Chapter 20

Once we were both able to stand without fear of our legs collapsing under us, we grabbed the little soaps and the only remaining washcloth and started scrubbing ourselves clean. There wasn’t much room for both of us, and at first, we kept bumping into one another for that reason. After a few minutes, it became obvious that she was bumping into me for other reasons too. However, my mind was too preoccupied to consider her reasons properly.

Jordan had told me that Danielle would be a wildcat in bed. So far, she was right. Danielle and I had gone almost as many times as Jordan and I had in less time. Though the thought of so much sex didn’t worry me, in and of itself, the thought of what was really happening did. Was this more proof of powers I never knew I had or did the two of them plan this? All of the little details told me that this wasn’t something they planned. Danielle wouldn’t have gone and gotten into a fight with Roger simply to have a daylong tumble in bed with me, and Jordan may have had a very different idea about why she was having sex with me but that didn’t have to mean that was the only reason.

I was distracted when Danielle turned around and ran her soapy-slick hands over my chest. She rubbed my nipples, making me jump, moan, and rise all at the same time.

Danielle looked up, a huge grin on her face. “I love that.” Before I could respond consciously, she tweaked both nipples. I couldn’t stop my reactions, any of them. She looked down at me where I was poking her in the belly. “I never knew a man could be so sexually excited by his nipples.”

I smiled but didn’t feel any humor. “Just lucky, I guess.”

Her lips were slightly parted, and she ran her hands over my pecks and ribs. Having never been close to anyone, and never having anyone attempt to tickle me for fun before, I was surprised by the sensation.

I pulled away automatically, the smile on my face a reflection of the burst of laughter that was continued to ring in my ears. I didn’t mean to be so loud and stammered an apology.

Danielle studied me with a mix of curiosity and mischief. “Why are you apologizing? I like the fact that you’re ticklish.”

I swallowed because the look of mischief overrode everything else on her face. I watched her as she tensed up, hands out, ready to attack.

All at once, she was on me. Her hands were small and quick. I chased feather light touches in one place only to find empty air and wriggled away from caresses in other places. I couldn’t move fast enough to catch her, nor could I stop the knee jerks or spine-bending twists her touches caused. I laughed harder than I remembered ever laughing. I tried to plead with her to stop, and ended up bear hugging her to pin her arms to her sides so I could have some relief.

Danielle rubbed my sides with the flat of her hands, soothing away the sensations. “I’m sorry Seth, I couldn’t resist.” There was laughter in her voice that I liked. It wasn’t mean, like I had heard so many times before, but in a tone that made me feel she was actually laughing with me.

I let her go and pulled back just enough to see her face. Her eyes, though dark in color, glowed with the exuberance while she calmed down. Even without any makeup and with her hair flattened to her head with water, that glow made her more beautiful than I had previously thought.

While we stood there staring into one another’s eyes, she brought her hands around and up. Her fingers lightly rubbed my nipples and for the first time since I noticed the change, I didn’t mind.

However, it reminded me of what Jordan had been trying to convince me. Was this truly a result of a magical bond between us, or was it some late-bloomer development I never could have dreamt of? Then again, standing there with Danielle in the shower, looking into her eyes while she was looking in mine, why was I thinking about Jordan?

Apparently, I had been thinking too long because Danielle asked, “Where are you?”

I blinked at her, not sure how to explain myself. “Just ... thinking.”

She closed the short distance between us and rubbed her belly against me. I was once again excited. “And just what were you thinking about?”

I was in trouble and knew it. It was one thing to meet someone and have sex, another to end up in bed with different people on different occasions, but I was caught in that conundrum of having slept with two women who were friends and feeling like I was about to be asked to choose between then. I was confused and a little scared. I wanted to explain it honestly with Danielle, and yet not talking would probably keep me out of trouble. The real problem was, she continued to watch my eyes and waited for an answer.

I knew her patience wasn’t endless; we couldn’t just stand there forever. She proved it when she squirmed against me again and said, “I won’t be upset if you were thinking about Jordan.”

I may have been confused about whether to tell her the truth or not before, but her statement didn’t help me any. She had talked about asking Jordan to join us earlier, but she’d been joking, right?

I had been raised to believe that someone was only supposed to be with one other person. Yet, what she implied contradicted that idea and confused me. “Why wouldn’t you be upset about me thinking about Jordan, especially considering...” and I wiggled around to indicate our current position and proximity.

The glow in her eyes faded. “Were you thinking about her?”

I shook my head. “Not the way you think I was.”

She reached down between us and gripped me. “Then what’s this?”

I dropped my hands to my sides and stepped back. From the way the glow left her eyes and the tone in her question, I wasn’t just in trouble, I was about to be punished.

Pain and fear washed through me, but I wasn’t a child anymore and I wasn’t simply going to stand there while someone verbally scolded me or did worse. First, I was going to get in what I had to say. “Alright. Fine. You and Jordan have had your fun, and I’ve had enough.”

Needing to put some distance between Danielle and me, I pulled open the curtain and got out. I was half expecting to find Jordan in the bathroom with us, sharing in on the fun. She wasn’t though, which only made it easier for me to grab one of the motel’s miniscule towels.

Danielle turned off the water and pulled the curtains open more. “Seth, what are you talking about?”

I shook my head and left the bathroom. Danielle called after me, but I refused to answer. It had all been too good to be true, meeting Jordan, going to the party, even losing my virginity. What made the idea especially confusing was how Jordan had talked me into having sex with her own friend. Why would she do that?

Danielle came out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her head and hair but nothing else. “Seth, what did you mean in there?”

I dropped my towel and gathered up my clothes. Anger was quickly replacing my fear. “I knew meeting Jordan was too good to be true, but I don’t understand why she would encourage me to be with you, or why you’d be with me in the first place.”

She stood there watching me with her arms akimbo and feet slightly apart. She looked like she was getting ready for a fight. I thought it was extremely unfair of her to argue with me while she was naked. I couldn’t stop myself from looking at her, even though I wasn’t in the mood.

She took a step forward, but didn’t close the distance. “Seth, I don’t understand. I thought you and I were having a good time together.”

I finally peeled my eyes off her long enough to get my pants on. Once they were fastened and zipped, I sat on the bed, shaking my head and said, “I don’t even understand.”

For a moment, she stood there and watched me while I put on my shirt and one shoe. I had to get down on the floor to fish my other shoe out from under the bed. After I collected it and sat on the bed again, she stepped closer. “Seth,” she said in a softer voice, “If you’ll talk to me, maybe we can work it out, together.”

I sat there with my shoe in my hands and looked up. She was close enough to touch but I stopped myself from reaching for her. I wanted to hold her, to feel her skin on mine, to rub as much of my body against hers and feel the same in return, but I didn’t dare touch her. I was too scared of those urges and confused by what I had always thought a relationship with a woman was supposed to be like versus the past two days. I held on to my shoe to keep my hands busy. Until I resolved the conflict in my mind, I wouldn’t feel right about what we had been doing. “Can we just talk?”

She stood there studying my face for a moment. I didn’t know what she was thinking, but she didn’t look upset. “I didn’t think guys could talk when there was a naked woman in the room.”

I shook my head, sighed, and said, “If you don’t want to talk, that’s okay. I’ll just get out of your hair.”

She shook her towel-laden head and picked up the towel I had dropped. She wrapped it around herself and sat on the bed. “Before you go, can I call the front desk and ask for more towels?”

I sat there, trying to calm down so I could think. She was covered up, but the urges I felt weren’t going away so easily. She was within easy reach and I wasn’t sure how long I could go before doing something I didn’t want to do. I nodded to her question and kept my hands on my shoe.

She nodded in turn and then turned and crawled across the bed for the phone. I looked away so I wouldn’t be tempted by the sight of more skin and only listened while she talked to the front desk. When she hung up, I felt her move on the bed. Her hands ran up my back and to my shoulders. At first, I wanted to pull away, to put some distance between us again. I don’t know what made me stay, the lack of wanting to fight or the fear that we would if I did. Sensing I wasn’t going to run, Danielle moved in closer behind me, her legs straddling me and her body pressed to my back.

For a moment, we sat there like that, just being calm. Danielle squeezed and rubbed my shoulders, trying to ease away any tension I felt. It felt good, but at the same time, I didn’t want to relax completely. I had things I needed to talk about, questions I needed answers to. I reached up and put my hands on hers, stopping her. “Can we talk, please?” I asked again.

She leaned in against me and rested her chin on my shoulder. “Sure,” she said. “So, what upset you so much?”

I felt a little awkward with her sitting behind me where I couldn’t see her, but something in her tone and the feel of her sitting behind me was relaxing. I knew she was studying psychology, but I seriously doubted any of her classes had instructions for the kind of sitting position we were in. It did make one thing easier though. Since I couldn’t see her without putting in the effort to turn and look, I wouldn’t be distracted or lose what little nerve I still had.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I was thinking about Jordan in the shower, but not about sex. I was thinking about some of the things that she’s been telling me since ... well, since we did it the first time. And then I thought about what you and I were doing, and what Jordan might think of that, and what you might think about me being with Jordan, and I was confused and scared...”

“And you lashed out,” Danielle said.

I tensed. “I didn’t mean to.”

“Seth,” she said, rubbing her hands up and down my back, “Relax. I’m not mad. I was confused but now I think I understand.”