Chapter 14

That Friday evening the four of us were sitting in the Palace. Since I knew Val was out shopping with Beth, I'd suggested that Brad pick me up. The ulterior motive my devious lady had come up with was simple: If Val and Brad seemed inclined, he could give her a ride home. If not, I'd ride back with him and Beth would have more time to talk with Val.

A beautiful plan. Now just to see if it would work.

Brad had been nervous driving out. "Tommy, do you really think Val will even talk to me? I mean, I kind of ran out on her last time."

Comments like that gave me the feeling Brad hadn't dated a lot and maybe his version of what happened on his date with Val was a bit exaggerated. Time would tell.

"Brad, I think the two of you just got off on the wrong foot. If it makes it any easier, don't even think of this as a date, it'll just be four people getting together for dinner." That seemed to relax him. I wondered if Beth was having the same conversation with Val.

Jeanie had put us in our special booth as she always did. I glanced at Beth and got a little shake of her head. I got the hint—neither of us would mention "Snuggle Booth."

We got our drinks—a Dr Pepper for Val and Cokes for the rest of us—and Jeanie had taken our order, pepperoni and sausage and onion for Beth and me— maybe it was time to start cultivating more of a taste for the damn things?, Brad and Val decided to split a garbage pizza; if nothing else they had the same tastes.

"Just how often are you out here? I mean there're a lot of pizza places closer to our side of town. Why here?" Val asked when it was obvious the staff all knew Beth and me.

"Well," Beth started, "Tommy brought me out here the first time shortly after we met. It was only after we'd been together for a while that we discovered our parents had been coming here for years, my grandparents too! Jeanie, our waitress, has been working here so long she knows all of them! How's that for weird?"

"Yeah, but that doesn't explain how you guys started coming here," Val said.

My turn in the barrel. "Um, I guess it's confession time. I learned about the Palace from a couple of the guys in the theatre back in high school and, besides having the best sound system in town, I just thought it was kind of special to be able to impress a girl by bringing her to a place most of our friends didn't know about. Sort of show her how well-travelled and world-wise I was. Sad, huh?"

"Did it ever work?" Brad asked with a grin.

"Well, it worked on me," Beth said as she wrapped her arm around mine and snuggled a little closer.

"Besides, they've got the best pizza in town!"

"And you should hear the stories about the parking lot out back!" I added. I saw a slight pink tint creep into Val's cheeks. Apparently Beth had already told her about the lot.

Val must have been paying attention to Beth's advice, as she was giving Brad plenty of room in the booth, being very careful not to show even a hint of possessiveness or lust. Meanwhile he was alternating between relief and disappointment at her lack of obvious interest.

Jeanie brought our pizzas and we all dug in. As we ate I noticed that while Val and Brad were attracted to each other, both were trying to be cautious and not push it.

It was fun to watch the two of them do their little "come closer, slowly" dance as we noshed. Beth was almost bouncing in her seat in excitement waiting to see how the evening would end.

By the time the pies were gone it was pretty obvious that Beth and I would have the Jeep to ourselves on the way home. Between the pizza and the conversation the four of us had been sitting there for almost two hours when Brad leaned over to Val and whispered something in her ear. With a slight blush she nodded.

"Um, Tommy, would you mind riding home with Beth? Val and I, er, well..."

"Hey, no problem. No offense, but I'd much rather ride with my lady anyway."

Jeanie came around the corner with the check. "So you kids have anything planned for the rest of the evening?"

"No, nothing special," Beth said as she handed Jeanie her plastic. Brad and Val just stood there not saying a word. Jeanie, being a keen student of human nature, realized what was going on and chuckled. "Well, have fun anyway," she said as she walked away.

I was roused from a nicely erotic dream by the evil spawn of A.G. Bell.

"Hullo?" I croaked.

"Tommy, it's Brad. Can we talk?"

"Um, sure." He could talk, I'd listen. I've found social discourse much easier after some caffeine and enough time to get both eyes open and focusing.

"I'm just leaving Val's now. Tommy, we slept together last night."

Oh, shit. What next?

The what turned out to be Beth's phone ringing.

"Um ... hello?" My lady sounded as out of it as I was. "Oh, hi, Val."

What the hell was this, a real-life When Harry Met Sally?

I climbed out of bed and listened to Brad try to explain what had happened. "Tommy, I was just going to drop Val off. I mean, she was acting normal and I didn't want to push my luck. Anyway, she asked me to come in for a while and I almost said no, but something made me go in with her. Anyway, one minute we were sitting on the couch talking about school and stuff and the next thing I knew I was waking up this morning with her curled up in my arms."

"So you slept with her but didn't 'sleep' with her, right?" It was too damn early for puzzles. I stumbled into the kitchen and started the morning coffee. Maybe that would help.

"Yeah, and you know what—it felt good, felt right."

"So are you going to see her again?"

"Um ... yeah, she asked me over for dinner tonight!"

He talked for another few minutes before I could gracefully get rid of him. I wasn't trying to be rude and I was genuinely interested in how the two of them were getting along but some things just take precedence. Coffee in hand, I stumbled into the bathroom. My body was telling me that since I was vertical, it was time.

After finishing the three "S"es and brushing my teeth I went back in the bedroom to get dressed, only to find Beth still on the phone. I love my lady dearly, but I'll never figure out women's fascination with talking on the phone. I DID recognize a situation where my presence wasn't needed.

My coffee mug and I made our way back to the kitchen. I rooted around in the refrigerator and came up with a tube of ready-to-bake cinnamon rolls. That's it—food! I managed to get the tube open, got the rolls on the cookie sheet and into the oven without dropping any on the floor, and felt pretty good about my achievement. Ug, me man. Get food for woman.

I'd just pulled the rolls out and put them on the counter to cool when I heard Beth in the shower and figured she was done talking to Val. I went back to the morning paper. My dad once told me that reading about the rest of the world's problems first thing in the morning was a hell of a way to start the day. Not that it stopped him from doing just that. He was right, but I'd picked up the same bad habit.

I was just finishing the Opinion page when my princess wandered in, obviously done with her three, er two, "S"es—I doubted she needed to shave—dressed and looking ready for the day.

"So how's Val?" I asked as Beth grabbed a cup of coffee and a roll.

"You mean besides panicky about tonight? Brad did tell you he was going over there tonight for dinner, didn't he?"

"Yeah. Why was she panicked? I mean it's just dinner, right? Or is something else in the air?"

"Tommy, sometimes I wonder about you. Well you and men in general. Don't you get it? The first dinner she cooks for him is a big thing. I mean, what if she messes it up? She wants to make a good impression and she's worried because she doesn't cook very often."

I was about to make a chauvinistic comment about all women being able to cook when I remembered the last time I made an assumption about men's and women's roles in society—something about assuming my lady wouldn't be able to help me with a mechanical design problem—and decided keeping my mouth shut was safer.

"So what did she say about last night ... and this morning?"

"It was kind of funny listening to her. I mean, one second she was panicking about dinner and the next she was all dreamy about waking up in Brad's arms. Oh, you wouldn't understand. Or maybe you would..."

I thought back to that first morning, waking up with Beth in my arms, and found myself having to wipe a silly grin off my face.

The next morning I was waiting for Brad to call ... which he finally did, just before noon.

"Tommy, I don't know what to do!"

"Why, what happened?"

"I slept with Val last night. I mean really slept with her!"

"You didn't push her, did you?" I was pretty sure he wouldn't, but it never hurt to check.

"No, it just sort of happened, but I think I might have hurt her."

"What! What did you do?"

"Well, as soon as we were done she ran into the bathroom, and I could hear her crying, but when she came out she said everything was alright. Tommy, I think she was a virgin. There was ... well ... there was some blood on the sheet!"

Val a virgin? It was going to take me a while to get my mind around that one.

"You didn't leave right after did you?"

"No! We just cuddled and then fell asleep. Tommy, I'm worried. I didn't use any protection! I never thought anything would happen and didn't have anything with me and now I'm worried. I mean what if she gets pregnant?"

"First of all, don't panic. Maybe she's on the Pill and even if she's not it doesn't mean anything happened."

An unlikely thought weaseled its way into my head. "Brad, was this your first time, too?"

A long pause then, "Yeah, I guess I was."

Guess? How can you guess about that?

"Brad, don't panic." Not until it was necessary, anyway.

"Tommy, I think Val's the right one for me."

I was going to give him the old shpiel about not rushing into a relationship, but I thought back to Beth and me and just couldn't do it.

By this time Beth was awake, listening to my side of the conversation, anxious to pump me for the whole story.

"When are you going to see her again?"

"I'm still here, Tommy. I haven't left yet! Should I take her out for breakfast or something?"

Either that, or lunch, I thought, looking at my watch.

"Yeah, that would be a good idea. Why don't you take her out and call me later."

"Oh, okay." And I was left holding a dead phone.

"So what happened? It sounded like they did it."

"Yeah, they did."

"Did I hear you ask Brad if he was a virgin?"

"Yup. He said he thought so."

"Thought so? How can there be any question? Oh, this is going to require some study."

I went on to relate everything Brad told me, knowing full well that Beth and Val were going to be having a long conversation this afternoon. The only question was which would call the other.

Val settled that by calling later Sunday afternoon. I was going to listen in on Beth's side of the conversation until I got The Look and remembered something I had to do in the garage, or at school, or maybe Timbuktu.

I decided to stop over and see how George was doing. By now he was pretty much back to normal. At least physically. His attitude toward life had certainly changed. As I was about to find out.

"Tommy, can you and Greg watch the house for a while?"

"Sure, George, is anything wrong?"

"I'm going to be gone for a while."

Not back in the hospital, I hoped.

"I'm taking a cruise. I've always wanted to see Alaska and, damn it, I'm not getting any younger!"

"Hey that sounds great! How long will you be gone?"

"Well, I really don't know. I found one of the cruise lines offers an open-ended package that'll let me get off one ship, travel around for a while, and then return on another ship. So depending on what I find to do up there, I may be gone for a while. Is that a problem for you kids?"

"No, not at all. Beth and I will be gone, but I'll let Greg and Cindy know. How about your mail and stuff?"

"I'm going to stop the mail and the paper. I think that's everything.

"Damn it, Tommy, I've been stuck in this house for too many years. Always worrying about money and things. My little trip to the hospital was just the jolt I needed to show me I was existing, but not living. I'm fixing that right now!"

"George, that sounds great. It's kind of funny, you're going north and we're headed south."

"You two going back to that island you told me about? Damn, that must be nice. Maybe my next vacation will have to be down there—all the warm sun and girls in those tiny bikinis. Yeah, I've got to do that!"

We talked for another hour or so and I found out George had never really taken a vacation. Oh, there'd been family trips when his parents were still alive, but no real vacations, just jaunts to see out-of-state relatives.

Our conversation was interrupted when Brad called back. I told George I'd see him again before he left and walked back across the alley listening to Brad describe everything about the afternoon ... right down to what they had to eat.

"So Val's okay and she's not mad at you or anything?"

"No, she's not. Tommy, should I have done it?"

"Brad, it doesn't sound like you pressured her into anything, it just happened naturally, right?"

"Yeah, I guess so..."

"Then you don't have any reason to feel guilty. Just treat her right, oh, and don't go blabbing it around or you'll have a very pissed-off girl on your hands.

"By the way, when I asked you if it was your first time you said you thought so. How can you not know? I mean either you had or you hadn't."

"But you see ... Tommy, I was going with a girl in high school and one night we were parking out on a country road. We were in the back seat, clothes all over the place, and well, it just happened. I got it in maybe an inch and it hurt her so much she screamed. I pulled out right away. So am I or aren't I?"

Damn, another philosophical question I didn't have an answer for. "Brad, why are you worried about it?"

"I'm afraid Val will ask me some time. I mean, if last night was her first, she's probably wondering about me, too."

Ah, hah, now we're getting to it. "Brad, I guess I'd say last night was really your first time. I mean, an inch only counts if that's all you've got, right?"

"I guess so, if you look at it that way. Thanks, Tommy. I feel better now."

We finished our conversation and I checked my watch. It was probably safe to go back inside. I love my lady dearly but she gets a little single-minded at times and I've learned to just leave her alone when she gets that way.

"Tommy, what are we going to do with those two?" was her first comment.

"Good question. A better one is: do we do anything? Remember way back when you told me we were only responsible for us? Should we do anything, or just let nature take its course?"

"Yeah, but..." oh, oh, here it comes: the rationalization for sticking our noses into—well, further into—our friends' lives. "I feel a little responsible for Val and I just ... oh, I don't know what I feel! Can we go for a ride? Maybe that'll clear my head out."

"Sure, let's go. Um, where?"

"Where do you think?" Beth said as we got in my Jeep.

"To the farm it is!" The weather had been great this Spring and I figured things were probably pretty well dried out.

I started to tell Beth about my conversation with Brad. We had just turned onto 81 when Beth brought up the question of the day. "By the way, what did Brad mean he thought he was a virgin?"

I told her Brad's story and my take on his situation.

"'Only if that's all you've got?' You really told him that?" Beth was giggling over my answer.

"Well, I didn't know what else to say. I mean is he or isn't he? What do you think?"

Beth sobered up as she considered my question. "Damn, Tommy, I don't know. I guess under the circumstances that was probably the best answer. I mean, it's not like he's just trying to add another notch to his bedpost or anything like that."

"Speaking of notches, he said he thought Val was a virgin, too. Can that be? I mean, the way she was coming on to me and how easy she was with her nude posing? How could she be?"

"Yeah, she was. Tommy, I can't explain it. It's almost like there were two Vals—the one you first knew and the ... I don't know ... the 'real' Val? All I know is she was a virgin until last night. Blood, pain and all."

"About that—Brad's afraid he hurt her. Now he's worried about her getting knocked up and what she'll think of him. Did she say anything about him?"

"Yeah. She's hooked. She doesn't want to lose Brad and she's afraid her reputation, deserved or not, will get back to him."

"Did we have this many problems? I don't remember them if we did," I said.

"I don't either. I guess we were just lucky."

By that time we were at the farm. We got through the gate and drove to our favorite spot. Beth got out, reached in the back of the Jeep, and pulled out a blanket. Not our scratchy old standby, but a new one. Nice and clean—not a sticky spot in sight!

Beth saw me eyeing her latest addition to the Jeep's "survival" kit.

"I saw this and realized we were due for something new. The label says it should be much easier to clean. And it's a lot softer, too."

She was right, no more scuffed knees, butts, or shoulders.

As we lay there, watching the sun set, my lady rolled over onto me. "Tommy, do you think Val and Brad will stay together?"

"I don't know. I guess we'll just have to sit back and see," I said as I started exploring my lady's fascinating topography. You never know, I might have missed a spot.

A week later I was climbing into my Jeep after school when my phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Tommy? This is Joe! I got a call today from the magazine!"

The magazine? The magazine! "What did they want? Are they going to review my stuff?"

"They wanted to verify that your gadgets were real products and that they could be ordered through the web site. I guess they've gotten stung a few times."

"Did they say anything about whether they liked them or not or when a review would be published?"

"Nope, just verifying that they were really in production. Apparently some small companies have a habit of sending in a prototype and hoping mention in the magazine will result in enough orders to justify production. Basically, they're using the review to do their market research. Enough of those have flopped, leaving customers holding the bag, that the magazine has started checking before publishing anything."

Damn! More waiting.

"Thanks for the call, Joe."

"Wait, Tommy, there's more—how long would it take to get some more extenders and heads ordered?"

"What! Are you telling me you've sold all of them?"

"Well, not all of them, but the pile's getting smaller. Between people buying them in the store and the web orders I've got maybe five of each left. Oh, and about half of the extra mounts."