Chapter 19: And Baby Makes Three

Greta had already delivered her baby son right on time. She became a constant visitor to the Haggard household. "You know, Ruby, this little wooly booger looks just like his daddy," she told her friend and laughed. "He's got this mop of black hair, he's wrinkled all over and he's ugly as sin."

Ruby laughed, "I bet Stanley is a real proud daddy, isn't he?"

"I'll say. Man, when we go to temple that ugly little Jew is so proud he almost has the rabbi convinced you Christians made a big mistake and our Aaron is the Designated One." She popped out a breast and began to nurse her baby. Ruby felt there was more to Greta's visit than a social call. She had learned her friend did things in her own way and time. She waited.

The two All American Pit Bulls had begun to show their true colors. No stranger came into the house without their approval. Baby Opal napped on the floor with her two protectors. Ruby laughed at the memory of when Opal began to fuss. Jimmy started to grab his daughter up off the floor to comfort her and found two tense and ready to attack young animals staring at him. Ruby was afraid Jimmy would lose his temper.

Instead, he told her, "I guess those two and I will see eye to eye about how things are to be handled around here."

"Well, Opal has two young pit bulls to guard her and I have the biggest one of all to keep me safe..."

"Ruby," Greta interrupted her reminiscence. "What are you going to do about re-election? The oil crowd has put up a ton of money to fight you. They have started circulating all those lies again, that you were a whore."

Greta looked at her friend, "I know Jimmy will return from Washington to back you and of course Little Sis has all the young people ready to turn out and campaign for you."

"Our Mister X has about shot his wad as our sources have now started to dry up. Stanley is waiting for Mister X to make his next pronouncement. Things are so crazy right now.

"As you know, all the staffers in both parties walk around the State Capitol on pins and needles. The better ones have quit and gone elsewhere to seek employment. They refuse to work under all the paranoia and mistrust they must endure as they are spied on by their own bosses."

"Well, here is an exclusive for you; I am not going to run again." Ruby smiled at the look of astonishment on Greta's face.

Then she dropped her bombshell, "Greta, I'm too tired to fight any more." She leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes. "No matter what we do, the stupid hicks keep electing the pretty face with the biggest promises and never once look at who is behind those promises or what their previous records were. Besides, I have been feeling real miserable lately. I think I may be getting an ulcer."

She added as an afterthought, "Also, I want to go back to singing again."

"Well I'll be." Greta grinned at Ruby and tucked her breast away as soon as Aaron finished nursing. "It sounds to me like you're knocked up again. If you are, it ought to put those rumors to rest that Jimmy is impotent and sterile."

Fear thrills shot through Ruby's stomach. "What did you just say?"

"I thought Jimmy had called and told you by now. An aide to Brandon Carter, the Congressman from Iowa publicly accused Jimmy of being a cuckold. It seems he got some retired Army doctor to sign a statement that Jimmy was shot in the groin in France and couldn't father anything more tangible than an idea."

All the blood drained from Ruby's face. "What happened? Tell me."

"Oh, Jimmy did his usual and kicked the man's butt up between his shoulder blades and went to a doctor at Walter Reed Hospital. He demanded a complete physical examination."

Ruby's heart went "thud." She had trouble breathing. "Oh god," she whispered as she visualized her whole past coming undone. The thought came to her, "What have I done to Jimmy?"

"Oh hell, don't worry. After Jimmy got out of the doctor's he went hunting for one scared congressman. Jimmy whipped up on the man's bodyguards when they came looking for him to reason with him. Carter returned home in a hurry before Jimmy got to him."

"Wh ... what did Jimmy do then?" Ruby was filled with dread.

"Well, he also ordered the hospital here in town to release Opal's blood type from her records. Then he took the whole thing to the speaker of the house and threatened to personally dismember any other person who started rumors about him or his family."

She laughed at the memory, "Actually what he said was he would rip the guts and the nuts out of any other son of a bitch who tried to attack his family."

"How come you know all about this and I never heard anything?" Ruby sensed something more was missing, a whole lot of something. She also resented that Jimmy had not called to tell her.

Greta laughed, "Both parties are trying to keep the lid on this. That little weasel, Truman, wants it to all go away so we can all get along again."

She started on a different tack, "The problems starting up in Korea have everyone jittery, especially the old Raeburn crowd. Jimmy agreed to keep it quiet for the present in the interests of peace and harmony."

"Well I don't like it that he never said anything to me." Ruby frowned, "If it is all so secret, how did you learn about it?"

"Nobody thought to swear Carter's people to secrecy. One of his office staff called me and told me about it. My new TV show has started to take off. All sorts of people call me and let drop tidbits." She laughed, "I am now my own Mister X."

Greta looked out Ruby's front window and saw Jimmy come storming up toward the house. "Here he is now, you can ask him yourself."

Jimmy's hand missed the doorknob. He slammed into the door and splintered the frame. "God damned cheap doors!" he yelled. "Tell someone to come out here and put a better one in."

Ruby was scared. Jimmy's voice woke the baby and she started to cry. "Jimmy, you stop scaring Opal."

Greta could not believe the change as Jimmy went from angry man to loving father. He scooped up the baby, growled back at the pups when they warned him with growls of their own. Then he began to make shushing noises.

Both maids came running into the living room and stood between Jimmy and Ruby. "Don't you go hurtin' Miss Ruby," one told him.

Jimmy looked at the pair in surprise. "Who the hell said anything about hurting my wife?" he yelled at them.

He turned to Ruby, "Tell them I won't ever hurt you. Are they crazy?"

"Jimmy Ray Haggard, lower your voice. You woke up Aaron now." Ruby frowned at him.

"Aw, honey, I'm just a little bit out of sorts. This has been a bad three days and I didn't want to bother you until I had everything nailed down. I wanted all the facts and I got into a couple of arguments and..." He shook his head.

"Jimmy," Ruby frowned at him, "You are babbling. Now slow down and tell me what this is all about." She did her best to not let the fear she felt inside show.

Jimmy looked at the two maids. "Will you two go someplace else and leave us alone?" He frowned at them. They left.

"Yes sah," one of the pair said in a weak voice. They retreated back into the kitchen.

"Jimmy, I already told Ruby," Greta said.

"Told her what?" Jimmy asked.

"Oh, just what a little birdie told me about Congressman Carter's accusations. So I came over here and told Ruby." Greta gave him a self-satisfied smile.

"Then you already know." He looked down at Ruby and told her, "I never felt so dirty in my life as I did when I told the hospital to release our baby's records." He looked at her for a moment and cast his eyes downward.

"Well?" She was resigned to have him denounce her.

He looked miserable. "Honey, that bunch almost had me convinced after that army doc swore I could never have made a baby."

He shook his head. "Then the dumb fool said I could never even get it up, or do anything if it did get even a little bit up. That was when I knew they were a bunch of liars trying to take me down."

"Anyway I hope that was my dick I was using all those times."

Ruby stifled a laugh she felt build up inside her. "Jimmy, we have a guest. Stop that bragging right now."

Relief coursed through her body as she told him, "Now get on with it."

"Oh Ruby, I feel so ashamed I even started to doubt you even a little. But they all seemed so sure of themselves. I actually wondered if you had two timed me." Tears ran down his cheeks, "Please forgive me."

"Jimmy honey, everybody gets doubts once in a while. Now will you please continue?" She began to relax inside.

"Well, anyway, you remember the baby did not come when we figured it should have come." He let out a loud bellow of a laugh that scared the dogs. "That's because she wasn't in you until almost a month later."

He laughed again and continued, "You missed your time of month for a different reason, but you were not pregnant when we thought you were. I talked to the doctor that delivered our baby and he said our baby was too small to be a month overdue."

"Oh Jimmy," she sighed.

He laughed again, "Honey, you haven't heard the best of it." He took a deep breath and continued, "My baby juice is completely normal. You got the most common type blood there is and I have the most rare. I am what they call a universal donor. So is Baby Opal."

Ruby started to cry. "Please Jimmy, come hold me."

"Damn it, don't cry. I can't stand it when you cry. Please Honey." He took baby Opal in his arms and hugged Ruby awkwardly.

"Baby juice?" Greta looked up at Jimmy. "What did you just call it? Baby juice?" She grinned at him and let out a guffaw.

Jimmy's face turned red. He was embarrassed, as he told her, "I don't know the polite word for it. However, you got the idea. Anyway, the doctor at Walter Reed Hospital could not find any damage except for a bunch of scar tissue where I was shot down there."

"Oh Jimmy, baby, in that case it looks like I might be knocked up again." She started to bawl, "I am so god damned happy I could just..." She began to cry all the louder.

""Honey, are you sure we're going to have another baby?" He looked down at her with hope in his eyes. "Are you real sure?" A grin started deep in his throat and plastered itself all over his face.

"Jimmy Ray Haggard, I am either developing an ulcer or else I am..." She clapped her hand over her mouth and jumped up out of her chair. She barely made it to the downstairs bathroom when she let fly and emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet bowl.