Chapter 11

"I suppose I'd better start at the very beginning," said Wendy. "I wasn't a virgin when I started with the agency. I'd lost it to Ronnie eighteen months earlier."

Theresa nodded.

"You don't miss much, do you Mum? Anyway it was painful, quick and messy in that order and I thought I wouldn't bother again, thank you, until I met someone I was in love with. That didn't happen. The only man I really loved and respected was Dad and nobody I met matched up to him. There was nothing incestuous about my love for him. I just wanted to do my best for him and to do things that would please him. That's why I decided to go for aeronautical engineering. It would be something we would have in common and possibly I might be able to work for him, as a research assistant or something.

"So I did all the right things at school and got a place here to read the subject. I was so happy and I met up with Sally and we shared digs. We were very different but over time a friendship developed. Then Dad died and the bottom fell out of my world. Oh, Mum, I know it was worse for you."

Theresa smiled comfortingly. "We both got over it, darling."

Wendy nodded. "The trouble was that you, Mum darling, had to cut back on my allowance and I had to find work. So I took that part time job at the library. That wasn't enough and I had to look for more. As I told you, Mum, I couldn't run two jobs and give the time I needed to my studies. Then a girl told me about this escort agency. I thought that's all I would do: look pretty and hang on the arm of someone at a do where he wanted to impress or needed female company. I was quickly disabused on that score and realised that without sex I wouldn't really be better off than working in the library whereas I'd get £250 for spending a night with a guy. So I took the job."

She sobbed and Theresa squeezed her hand.

"The first guy was OK and treated me with respect. The second treated me as rubbish but wasn't violent or anything. The third was like a rabbit and kinky. He left me bruised, sore and frightened. I hated it, particularly the last but, for Dad's sake, I had to keep going. I was a bit frightened about going to a private house and," she smiled at Bill, "I got a pretty intimidating welcome but after that you were sweet to me. As I said to you, it turned out to be more pleasure than business. Then you came up with that wonderful offer.

"I was overcome with gratitude and even more so when you routed the stalker so I started to go out of my way to please you much as I used to with Dad. I also became very fond of you and in many ways you became a substitute for him. Then, because of our love making, which wasn't out of gratitude, and after you reunited me with Mum I fell in love with you. The trouble was that I was pretty sure that you didn't feel the same way about me. Oh, I knew you were very fond of me and found me attractive but that was all. I talked to Sally about it and she said that you didn't think you were right for me and would hold me back from my ambitions. All the same, I still went on loving you."

She looked down and nervously twisted her hands. "You're probably not going to like the next bit, Bill. When Stephen and I started working together properly last term I hoped it might make you jealous but it didn't seem to. He started to complain about all the distractions when we were working at your house: the noise of the television, the piano, clattering in the kitchen, you and Sally talking loudly and so on. He persuaded me to do the majority of our work at his place. He obviously had designs on me but played me slowly and gently. Apart from our shared interest in aeronautics we didn't have much in common but I became fond of him and, because you were showing no reaction, I let him lead me on. In the end he persuaded me to move in with him. The whole time I kept hoping that you would come and claim me.

"The first week was fine but then he slowly became more and more possessive. He didn't want me ringing you and Sally. He didn't like me talking to other men at uni. One day, he caught me trying to ring you. He snatched away my mobile and jumped on it. He spanked me too but only with his hand. It still hurt though, even through jeans. After that he became more and more possessive. I wasn't allowed out alone and on campus he'd even follow me to the loo and wait outside the door for me. He also made me cancel coming to see you at Easter, Mum. That was the first caning I had because I refused. Again I was wearing jeans but he gave me ten strokes. He made me count and apologise after each one. It really hurt.

"Anyway, on Easter Sunday I asked him if I could phone you, Mum, to wish you a Happy Easter. He refused me, I argued with him and he completely lost it. He dragged me upstairs, forced me to strip, tied me to the bed and flogged me. I lost consciousness.

"That convinced me I had to get away. I couldn't get out of the house without his knowing and he'd have caught me immediately. In any case he never let me out of his sight. Then on Tuesday morning, I was up but only wearing my nighty and he said he was going to get a paper. I thought he reckoned he'd be back before I could get dressed and run away. I took my chance to ring you, Bill. Actually it was a trap. As soon as he heard my voice he came back in through the front door, grabbed me round the mouth and tore the phone away from. He was absolutely furious but did remember to replace the receiver. He flogged me again but this time he did it in stages, letting me lose consciousness but wading in again when I had recovered a bit. Before he started each flogging he gave me a lecture about belonging to him and not disobeying him. Each time he hit me he said 'You're mine' or 'Obey me'. He was just leading up to the third time when, thank God, you and the police arrived, Bill."

She stopped and putting her head in her hands began to weep. Theresa was already doing so. Bill, biting his lip to control his emotions, put his arm round her. They stayed that way for many minutes. Finally, Wendy shook her head vigorously. Bill gave her his handkerchief and she wiped her eyes and blew her nose.

"Anyway," she said, "it's over now and there's no use crying over spilt milk. I'm just sorry that I've caused you, the two people I love most in the world, such grief and worry."