Chapter 7

We paused to recover a bit after that. Sara remained in Seth’s lap. He held her there affectionately. It made me feel warm all over to see them together that way.

It was several minutes before Jeff turned to me and said, “I think we would all like to hear about what has been going on in your life in the last two days.”

There went the good feelings!

I thought about the things that have happened to me, especially the things that happened today. I really don’t want to do this. But I said, “You know everything, Jeff. I held my breath and listened in shock as Dr. Carter told you what he has put me through. Do you really want the kids to hear what happened to me, especially the things that happened today?”

He smiled and said, “I doubt if you can top Sara’s story. But Dr. Carter didn’t go into a lot of detail. I’m interested in learning how you felt about what has happened to you and how you feel about it now. And the kids have heard bits and pieces. What you’re going through has a big effect on their lives, too. If at some point they start to feel uncomfortable they can say so.

“All three of us are stunned at the huge change in your behavior and your attitude in only two days. It affects our entire family. I want to hear how this happened and I imagine the kids are wondering, too.”

“But Jeff, some of what happened today, it’s pretty ... it’s ... the kind of thing you don’t want your husband or your kids to know about. I couldn’t believe it when he told you about ... Dawn.”

I saw Seth and Sara glance at each other when I mentioned Dawn.

Jeff looked at me. He looked over at the kids. Then he smiled and said, “We are sitting here naked. We just listened to our teenage daughter describe her sex life with her brother. Everything that has happened to our family today has all come about because of you, because of the changes Dr. Carter has brought about in you in only two sessions. Our lives have changed drastically. I’m not going to force you to tell us what happened. But I think you should. I think you owe us that. If it helps, I know we’re all happy about the change in you, no matter what’s responsible for it.”

I took a sip of my mixed drink. I’m still aware of the effects of the drug I’m taking. I suspect the effects are being amplified by the alcohol. I have to be honest. I’m nervous about how my family will react to what I’m about to tell them. But the things I did, and the things that were done to me today were so very exciting. And the excitement hasn’t faded as the hours have passed.

I enjoyed an epiphany with Dawn today. My life changed in that far too short a time I spent on the floor with her. It was such a momentous event in my life that I feel like I need to share it with someone. I’m just not sure that the people I should be sharing it with should be my husband and my children. But I guess I have to agree with Jeff. I owe them an explanation.

So I told them everything. There wasn’t much to tell about what happened in his office yesterday beyond my reactions to meeting Dr. Carter and the revelations about my stunted fantasy life.

But today was a different story. I told them about undressing in front of a man for the first time in my life. I told them in great detail about the time I spent on the floor with Dawn. Jeff already knew about it, though not in as much detail as I provided that evening. But the kids found out for the first time that those momentous, breathtaking orgasms I enjoyed thanks to Dawn were the first ones I ever experienced.

The hard part was explaining what an emotional breakthrough it had been and what I was thinking when I was experiencing those life altering “exercises,” as Dr. Carter referred to them.

I was also very embarrassed when I described masturbating for the first time. Then I tried to explain to them how humiliated I was when they came to his office and found me there, nude.

I mentioned how surprised I was, how strange it seemed to me that he was able to sit in his chair and remain so aloof, so detached, so apparently unaffected as he witnessed everything I had just described.

My tale wasn’t nearly as erotic as the one that Sara told earlier. But there was a long silence that followed while we all collected our thoughts. And then we all turned to look at Jeff.

He took a sip of his drink before saying, “I’m afraid there isn’t much I can say. The first half of my discussion with Dr. Carter was over my head for the most part. He used technical words and phrases I’ve never heard before and cannot translate into English. The second half of our discussion involved his plans for future exercises. I promised not to divulge them because that might affect the outcome.

“I will say that some of what he has planned is pretty shocking and I’m not sure unorthodox quite covers it. If he hadn’t achieved such amazing results in two days I’d be tempted to put a stop to it. But I can’t argue with the results I see right before my eyes.”

He looked at me and said, “For the first time in sixteen years you wanted to make love to me tonight. That’s what we were going for. But he said it’s quite likely the changes will not be permanent if we don’t stick with it and complete the treatment plan he has laid out for you.

“Rebecca, some of what he has planned...”

He sighed and gulped down the rest of his drink. Then he tried again. “Some of what he has planned is beyond outrageous. I’m supposed to encourage you to continue. I want this change in you to be permanent. But I have to tell you, I will understand if you can’t do what he asks. If, on the other hand, you do what he wants, it is just as important that you understand I won’t hold against you anything you do as a result of his treatment plan.”

I sat back and stared at him. The look on his face, the tone of his voice, he’s scaring the hell out of me! I paused for a long time, not even really thinking anything before I said, “That isn’t scary at all! What am I supposed to make of that?”

Jeff put a lopsided smile on his face and replied, “That I love you and I want you to get better. But that I will understand if you can’t do some of the things he wants you to do.”

I thought about it for a moment. But then I said, “Remember what I promised you earlier?”

He wasn’t sure what I was referring to. So I repeated it. “I’m going to spend the rest of my life trying to make amends for the last sixteen years. I meant that. I’ll do whatever it takes to become the wife you deserve.”

He’s obviously touched. But he leaned forward, took my hand in his and said, “I appreciate the sentiment. I really do. But there may come a time in the next nine days that you are ordered to do something so truly outrageous you cannot do it. I want you to know I’ll support you, no matter which way you go. I want you to be changed, cured, not damaged. I love you.”

I appreciated the out he’s giving me. But that only made me more determined to do whatever I have to do. I want this change to be permanent. I want to make mad passionate love to my husband and make him the happiest man in the world. I owe him so much. And the fact remains that it’s impossible to argue with the phenomenal success Dr. Carter has already had in treating me.

I leaned down and kissed his hand. Then I looked him in the eyes and asked again, “Do we really have to wait until Saturday?”

I know the kids will know what I’m talking about. But I don’t care.

Jeff smiled and said, “Trust me, darling. It’s going to be much harder for me than it is for you.”

In a voice so low she was almost whispering, Sara said, “There are other things you can do.” Then she blushed and offered, “Or I could help.”

Jeff almost fell out of his chair. I laughed and said, “You can see how he feels about that. But maybe we can work on him. I hate to see him all wound up like this.”

Jeff looked back and forth between us and finally exclaimed, “Have you two completely lost your minds?!”

Sara shrugged and said, “There are things we could do ... things I’ve done with Seth. I like doing them. It’s exciting. And if mom doesn’t mind what’s the harm?”

He looked to me for help but I didn’t. I smiled and said, “I wouldn’t mind, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Jeff covered his face with his hands and muttered, “I must have slipped into some strange, parallel universe. These are not the same two beautiful females I’ve known all these years.”

Then he put his hands down and said, “It’s time for you kids to go to bed. Go! There are too many tits at the table. I’m getting uncomfortable!”

We all understood perfectly. They got up and the kids started to clear off the table. I told them I’d take care of it and sent them off to bed. As I did I wondered whose bed I was sending them off to. I can’t imagine that after this sexually charged afternoon and evening they won’t be spending some quality time together.

After they went inside I asked, “I think there’s a great deal Sara could teach me. If you won’t make love to me, we could try some of the other things the kids do for fun. Those things I’ve refused to even consider all these years suddenly don’t seem like such a bad idea. You can’t believe how exciting it was, once I calmed down, when I knew you were watching me play with myself at Dr. Carter’s office.”

Jeff sighed and said, “I hate myself for doing it. But I gave him my word that I will do nothing more than hold you in my arms, comfort and support you until Saturday.”

I’m feeling very antsy now. Horny, actually. I’m not happy about having to wait to satisfy my newfound sexual appetite. But the doctor said it’s necessary so I’ll force myself to wait. The man is obviously a genius. It doesn’t seem fair, though, that Jeff has to suffer with me.

I took his hand in mine again and said, “I really wouldn’t mind if you want to take Sara up on her offer. And I’m kind of amused at how eager she is to volunteer her services.”

He shook his head and said, “No. I can’t do that. I won’t even try to lie to you. She’s sexy as hell and it’s a tempting offer. But I don’t think it’s possible that there won’t come a time when she’d resent me for doing something like that if I were to cave in. If I were to look into her eyes someday and see that well-earned resentment it would break my heart.”

“I think you’re wrong. I don’t think she’s like that. I learned today that I don’t know my daughter nearly as well as I thought I did. I’ve been very impressed. I would give anything to be half as well adjusted as she is.”

Jeff got up and said, “Come on, let’s go to bed. You have a hard day ahead of you tomorrow.”

I stood up. But before I cleared off the table I asked, “Those things the doctor has planned for me ... do you think they’ll help me?”

Jeff shrugged and said, “I honestly don’t know. If he hadn’t changed you so much already I’d put my foot down and say find another doctor. But it’s hard to compare the woman you are now with the woman you were two days ago and not think that the guy is on to something. I had the same expectations you did before you went to see Dr. Carter. That you’d require years of therapy. That it would be a long, slow process and change would be maddeningly slow in coming. But look at you! Look at all four of us!! The man is a magician!”

I’m scared silly because of the way Jeff feels about what he knows the doctor has in mind for my future treatment. And I’m scared because I don’t know how much of the change I’ve undergone is a result of being drugged though I can’t deny the calming effect of the drugs has surely helped me get through the difficult treatment he has put me through.

But I keep coming back to my heartfelt promise. I’m going to spend the rest of my life trying to make up to Jeff for the last sixteen years of denial to which I’ve subjected him. If the things Dr. Carter has planned for me tomorrow are going to be hell on me, well, maybe I deserve it. No, forget about “maybe.” I’ve put my loving husband through hell for sixteen years. Nothing Dr. Carter can subject me to can be any worse than that.

For the first time in our marriage we cuddled together in the nude when we went to bed that night. It was pleasant except that I can’t stop focusing my attention on the hard cock pressed between the cheeks of my ass and thinking that I should insist that he let Sara do something about that.

I know. That isn’t a very motherly thought to have. I suppose the possibility that I could harbor an idea like that has something to do with the twisted course I have taken to this point in my screwed up life. I honestly don’t have a problem with my daughter doing something to help my husband out.

We were both still awake nearly an hour later when I heard movement in the hallway. I knew what it was. By the direction of the quiet footsteps I’m able to figure out Sara is returning to her bedroom from Seth’s.

I reached a decision. This is silly! And I owe him this. I got up and said, “I’ll be right back.”

I went down the hall to Sara’s room. She looked up when I tapped on her open door. She knows I’m aware of where she has been for the last hour. She grinned sheepishly and asked, “You aren’t mad are you?”

I smiled and shook my head. I said, “I knew where you were going when you went upstairs. And I don’t blame you.”

I entered her room and closed the door behind me. I leaned against it and asked, “Were you serious when you offered to ... you know, with your dad?”

She smiled and nodded.

“He’s afraid that if you do what we’re talking about a day will come when you’ll regret it, when you’ll resent him for it.”

She smiled and said, “No one in this house has ever done anything to me that I didn’t want done. You know me pretty well. Do you really think I don’t know any better?”

I crossed to where she’s standing beside her bed and took her in my arms. I hugged her and kissed her forehead. Then I said, “God no, sweetheart! I truly respect and admire you. If I wasn’t there when you were born I’d refuse to believe you’re only fourteen. You’re so mature, so intelligent. I’d give anything to be more like you. You truly impress me.”

She laughed quietly and said, “I’ll be fifteen in less than a month. I can’t drink or drive or legally have sex. But I’m reasonably intelligent and I’ve been raised well in a loving home. I know I’ve profited from that and while I don’t pretend to be an adult, I believe I’m more mature than most of the kids I know, especially the boys.

“I’m not making this offer in a vacuum. I know how to please a guy without going all the way. I know how because I’ve been doing it with Seth and I really do enjoy doing it. If dad will let me I’d love to do it for him.”

I squeezed her tight and said, “I’d give anything if I could be more like you. I wish I could go back in time and be the girl you are now instead of the warped little bitch I was.”

She smiled and said, “The big difference between me and you when you were my age is our parents. Thankfully you didn’t screw me up the way your parents screwed you up. But I have to say, I really like the change in you in the last couple of days. I’m very impressed. I’ve always loved you. But I have to say, I feel so much closer to you now. I love the way our whole family has changed since you started seeing Dr. Carter.”

I kissed her forehead and said, “I love the changes, too. Let’s keep them coming. Your dad doesn’t know I’m in here. But we’ve been lying in bed for more than an hour now. He has a hard-on and he’s wide awake. I don’t know what he’ll do when he sees you. But why don’t we go in there and rape him? We may fail. But it won’t hurt to try.”