Chapter 5

I forced my eyes open and tried to make out the dim outlines of ceiling above our bed. I was lying on my back, so the ceiling was the first thing I saw. I could tell from the light that it was fairly early. Mom fidgeted beside me. Her warm body was molded tight against mine, and her arm was draped over my chest. My arm was sandwiched between us, and I had a brief thought about how an amputee must feel. Morning thoughts are always interesting.

Anyway, I didn't remember Mom coming to bed the previous night. By the time John chauffeured us from Shay's and turned his car into the Greenwall driveway, I was ready to crash. Physically, the girls had put me through the ringer. However, it was the emotional roller coaster of the previous evening that really had me on the ropes. From the anxiety about Shay's parents possibly discovering Mia on our date to seeing Mr. Rapist and the Bitch at the restaurant to the confession about me and Mom, it made for a pretty draining evening.

Mia must have felt the same way, because instead of her coming back to the guesthouse, we went to her room. We made out a little on her bed, but she fell asleep pretty quickly. I almost joined her in the land of Nod, but since I didn't want to push the whole "sleeping together" thing, I woke her long enough to tell her good night, then went to bed in the guesthouse. I said good night to the parents on my way through the family room and into the backyard. They were watching some movie, all huddled on the couch, and seemed to be pretty involved in it, so we didn't chat.

Now here I was, lying next to my mother. In less than 24 hours, I'd confessed my sexual relationship with her to both of my girlfriends. Mia's reaction shocked me. I hadn't expected her to accept it so willingly. I guess her reaction spoiled me, because while I told myself that I couldn't expect a positive reaction from Shay, I was still disappointed that she didn't accept it as readily as Mia.

I took a deep breath to inhale my mother's scent. Her hair smelled clean, like she'd just recently washed it. That made me a little sad, because then I couldn't smell any of her other scents. There is a certain smell to a woman at the end of the day, a mixture of sweat, perfume, and other smells that have permeated their clothes, hair, and skin. I'm sure guys were the same, but I hadn't made an active attempt to notice by sniffing on any guys. Anyway, I found mom's end-of-day scent to be pleasant and comforting, and I'd grown accustomed to it when I woke each morning. Needless to say, that made me long for it even more.

Suddenly, I realized I needed Mom. Right then and there, I needed her. The less than enthusiastic reaction from Shay made my feelings for Mom murky. Throw in the facts that she didn't smell like Mom, and that we hadn't had sex since Sunday night, and I was having some serious feelings of doubt.

I rolled over, wrapped my arm around her, and pulled her body tightly to mine. Her face was buried in my neck and her breasts pressed firmly against my chest. When my morning wood pressed her mound, she hummed her approval.

"Good morning, Brody," she murmured happily, as she stretched.

I answered her by tilting my head to hers and firmly kissing her lips. She hummed into my lips and returned the kiss, so I quickly ratcheted up the intensity by opening my mouth and running my tongue along her lips. She tensed a little in surprise, but then accepted my offering. Her arms pressed into my upper back as she sucked on my tongue.

I rolled over on top of her, but she turned her head to break our kiss. She looked up at me. Her eyes were lively, her cheeks flushed, and her mouth so inviting.

"Wow, Son," she panted. "I thought those two girls would have worn you out last night. You sure were dead to the world when I crawled into bed."

"Mom, will you make love to me this morning?" I asked, before burying my face in her neck to nibble on that soft flesh.

"Mmm," she hummed, as she enjoyed my attention. "Why so intense this morning?"

I stopped my mouth work long enough to answer. "I just miss you, that's all. It's been a couple of days."

"But you've been with Mia and Shay."

"That doesn't mean I don't still want to be with you." I kissed up her neck to her ear and then her face, planting slow, wet, kisses on each eye. "There are some times I just need YOU, Mom."

Mom's hand on my cheek pulled my face in front of her. She looked deeply into my eyes, her expression a mix of arousal and motherly concern.

I felt a lump in my throat and could feel that tell tale burning in my eyes. Dammit, I didn't want to cry. "Please," I pleaded, quietly.

She looked at me for another few seconds, and I was sure I was going to lose it. But then she kissed my lips gently. I felt her hands working down between us and felt my erection being pulled through my fly. We shared ome more gentle kissing while she pulled her panties to the side. Then she locked her legs around my upper legs and pulled with them. When I felt my cock hit her warmth, I lunged into her. We both moaned into the other's mouth.

When my cock was fully embedded inside her, she pulled my head down so she could whisper in my ear.

"Make love to me, Brody. Make love to your mother."

I bit back the sob that almost escaped my throat. Why couldn't I love my mom the way we wanted without having to worry about what the rest of the world thought? Why did we have to hide it? Whoever said forbidden love was arousing was an idiot. I didn't want my relationship with Mom to be forbidden or hidden, or anything stupid like that. I kept my face buried in her neck so she wouldn't see my tears. Then we made love. It was slow and languid. I didn't vary my strokes at all, just taking long deep, slow, plunges into her. She cooed encouragement and love into my ear while we moved.

A full night's sleep does wonders to the rejuvenating powers of the young. We languidly made love for maybe five minutes before I could feel myself getting close. My moans became more urgent, but I fought the natural inclination to speed up my thrusts. I began to breathe through my nose as I reached my peak.

"Come inside me, Baby," Mom whispered, as she dotted kisses on my ear. "Fill your mother's womb."

I bit my lip to keep from crying out. With a tiny grunt, my hips jerked twice, just a little, before my cock opened up and poured my semen into her. I pushed forward with each spurted offering, and after a half dozen or so, I lay still on top of her.

Then I cried. So much for being a tough guy.

Mom rubbed my back, shoulders, and head with her hands, and my legs with hers. All the while she soothed and comforted.

"Shh ... Sweetie ... shhh ... it'll be OK ... shh..."

It was weird crying while lying in my mother's arms. I hadn't done that in a really long time, and I certainly had never done it while my penis was embedded inside her vagina.

After some long minutes, I had calmed enough and was just laying with most of my weight on my elbows and her lower body. She scraped her nails gently along the contours of my back, which gave me goosebumps and crinkled my nipples.

"You OK, Baby?" she asked, quietly.

I tried to say yes, but all that escaped was a croak. So I just nodded.

"You want to talk about it?"

I almost said no, but that was the Old Brody, the one who kept his feelings from his mother. I was a New Brody, matured by the experiences in my life, and the New Brody didn't keep things from his lovers.

"I told Mia and Shay about us," I whispered.

She didn't even flinch. She just kept caressing my back. "I figured as much. I take it the news wasn't received well?"

"Actually, it was received better than I expected." I continued to whisper, for no other reason than it felt like the right way to talk at the time.

She stopped her caressing. "Really?" I'm sure she was trying to match my words to my display of emotion.

"Well, Mia accepted it without question, even praising me for being a good, considerate, son." I could feel mom's body shake a little, and I knew she was chuckling at that. It was a silent chuckle, though. "Shay was surprised by the revelation. She wasn't turned off by it, but she had a hard time wrapping her mind around it, I guess."

"Well, that does sound like a fairly positive reaction. You probably just need to give Shay some time to digest the news."

"That's what she said."

"So, why the emotion this morning?"

"I guess I just think about how much I want to be able to be openly affectionate with you, but I can't. If someone who loves me has problems handling it, I'm pretty sure the rest of the world would absolutely flip out."

"This isn't news, Sweetie. We've talked about the taboo nature of our relationship."

"I know, but it just seemed to really hit me last night. I mean, when I have some public achievement, like winning a meet, graduating from school, or something, I'll want to thank you. I simple peck on the lips and a hug just doesn't seem like enough, not when I want to wrap my arms around you and kiss you with everything I have so that no one will ever doubt how much gratitude and affection I have for you and everything you've helped me do and be."

Mom was quiet for a long moment before sighing. "I'm so sorry, Brody. I was afraid of this when we became intimate. I was afraid that our mother-son relationship would be altered in every way. Not being able to share in those life experiences in the natural way our relationship demands was a sacrifice we made. That doesn't mean you can't express your gratitude and affection more intimately in private. It just means that public displays of affection need to be reserved."

"I know that, Mom. I just find it to be pretty shitty that two people who love each other have to remain so secretive about it."

"Now you can empathize with how so many people have felt over the years. For thousands of years people have had to suppress forbidden loves, whether because of religion, race, gender, or even familial ties." She pushed on my arm, so I rolled off her and lay on my back again. She sat up and put her weight on her hand so she could look down at me. "Every intimate relationship has its limits, Son. Even those in the most 'normal' intimate relationship can only express affection in public to a certain extent. Beyond that and it can be viewed as disrespectful, immoral, scandalous, and the like. Our relationship just has a different set of constraints in public."

"Yeah, I guess you are right," I said. "But that doesn't mean I have to like it."

Mom was quiet again for a while before ruffling my hair. She smiled warmly at me. "I'm glad you told Mia and Shay. They had a right to know. Never keep secrets from your significant others; it only hurts in the long run. As much as you may hate to hear this, as long as you plan to pursue a relationship with those two girls, our intimacy will take a back seat to that relationship. If either of them have a problem with what we do, we may need to consider stopping."

She leaned over and kissed my firmly. "I love you, Brody. I always have and I always will. No matter the physical nature of our relationship, I will always love you as my son AND as my lover. Even if we never make love again, you can't erase what we've shared."

I felt better, at least a little. I hate getting all weepy. I'm not one of those "Real men don't cry" types, but I still hate when I do. I get all snotty and my eyes get all red. "I love you, too, Mom. Thanks for letting me get emotional on you."

"Hey, that's what moms are for." She stood up. "Now get up. We don't want to waste the day!"

When I turned to head up Shay's walk, I seemed almost overwhelmed by anxiety. I mean, things weren't exactly roses when I left the previous night. Still, she called Mia's house this morning and told me her parents agreed to let her go Christmas shopping with me. Mia thought that was a great idea and roped Ana into lugging her to the mall to meet us. Ana convinced Kirsten, her best friend and swim teammate, to go with her so they could finish up their shopping, as well.

So here I was, heading up the sidewalk to begin my second trip to the local mall with a different girl than the first trip. This sucked, primarily because I hate shopping. Granted, I was with my girlfriend, so it wasn't a total loss. I'd be meeting my other girlfriend there, but that issue only added to my anxiety. Shay didn't want her parents to know she was secretly meeting up with Mia. Yet, we were playing with fire here. Parents aren't stupid, no matter how much we think they are. Mom proved that to me time and time again.

Those two factors—The Revelation from the night before and The Secret Rendezvous—were keeping me on edge. Imagine my surprise when an issue completely off my radar reared its head.

Doug Spurlock answered my knock with a stern expression. Without a word, he stepped aside and pointed into their living room. I suddenly wanted to vomit. Which pile of shit was he going to throw at the fan? Nervously, I stepped past him and went into the room.

"Sit," he said evenly, pointing to the couch. I obeyed. He stood over me with that stern expression weighing down on me. He was silent for what seemed like the longest time. Finally he stepped back and sat slowly into a chair. "Have you had sex with my daughter?"

Oh, yeah. I forgot about that little issue. Damn. I must have looked at him funny because his expression almost broke. I was sure the corner of his mouth almost turned up. Almost. But he kept it together and waited me out in silence.

How to answer that? What did Shay tell him? What did she want ME to tell him? That same old advice crept up again. Be a man. It seemed funny how that little pearl of wisdom was my constant companion as of late.

I sat up straight. "Yes, Sir."

I waited for the fallout. I anticipated being thrown out of his house or at least yelled at, though I was pretty sure he wasn't going to get violent. He did none of things, opting to stare me down instead. I felt supremely uncomfortable and wondered for just a moment if the sex was worth it.

Who was I kidding? Of course, it was worth it.

After what seemed like an eternity, he leaned forward in his chair. "How do you feel about my daughter, young man?"

That was an easy question. "I care for her a great deal, Sir, and my feelings for her get stronger every day."

"Do you love her?"

I mulled this over. I'd been asking that question for months, and I was confident that I did love her. But what exactly did that mean? I loved lots of people, and that love was different for every one of them. I was still pretty young. I wasn't entirely sure I knew all that much about the kind of love Mr. Spurlock was talking about.

"I believe so. I'm still a little young to know exactly how that kind of love is supposed to feel, but each day that passes strengthens my belief that, yes, I love Shay."

Now it was his turn to look thoughtful. He watched me for a long time before speaking again.

"Brody, I appreciate your honesty. I also appreciate you not trying to make excuses for your actions. I suspected that the two of you had sex, and I eventually wheedled Shay into confessing this morning. I can't say I'm entirely thrilled that she's engaged in sex at such a young age, but considering the things she's been through, it is not a complete surprise." He pointed at me. "Just because I wasn't surprised by it doesn't mean I condone it, nor will I just sit back and allow her to freely engage in this activity whenever, and with whomever, she chooses. I like you, Brody. From the moment I met you, I sensed that you were sincere, genuine, and a nice young man. I must admit, I'm more comfortable knowing that she is with you than I am with some of her other friends. I'm going to go so far as to say that I trust you with my daughter. Don't abuse that trust."

He stopped like he wanted an answer. "Yes, Sir. I mean, I won't, Sir." This seemed like a good time to at least express sorrow. "Please accept my apology for any disrespect I've shown to you and your wife."

He nodded and then stood. I prepared to stand, but he motioned for me to wait. He left the room and was gone for less than a minute. When he returned, his wife and daughter trailed behind him. Shay gave me a look of apology as she sat beside me on the sofa. I tried to reassure her with my smile, but then took her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, just as an added measure. I looked back at Shay's parents, who were seated in the two chairs opposite the couch.

"My discussion with Brody has been enlightening. I recognize that it would foolish of me to tell you to stop having sex. However, that doesn't mean I still can't attempt to place some constraints. Brody has given me his word that he will not abuse the trust I'm placing in him, trust that I hope will ensure your well-being, Shay. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"Yes, Daddy," Shay said, as she squeezed my hand, likely to let me know she really did understand. I was surprised to hear her use the slightly childish name for her dad, but given the current lecture, it probably wasn't that odd.

"Good. Now here are my expectations. Practice safety in all aspects. Take all the necessary precautions against pregnancy and disease. We would prefer that Shay participate in that activity here, in the controlled and safe environment of her home, rather than in a car or out in the open somewhere. Brody is here for only a short while, but while he is here, we will be restricting how much private time you spend together. Dates should be in public locations and should only be long enough for the activity planned. You can come back here to spend more time. As difficult as it is for us to do, we will allow you some private time during the rest of your visit. If we leave you two alone for a few hours, we expect you to be mature, trustworthy, and discreet in your actions. We won't ask what you did during those hours unless we have reason to believe that you have gone against our wishes. We also ask that you refrain from sharing intimate details with us."

For some reason, that last statement made me blush. While I was able to talk to Mom about intimate details of my love life, for obvious reasons, I still found it embarrassing to discuss it with other adults. So, even just thinking about sharing it was enough to make me blush.

Mr. Spurlock took a deep breath. "Is this arrangement acceptable to everyone?" He looked at Shay. Her hesitation brought one more comment from him. "I'm not asking if you like the arrangement. I'm just asking if you find it acceptable."

Shay sighed. "Yes, Daddy."

He looked at me. "Yes, Sir."

Then he looked at his wife, which drew a warm smile from her, before turning back to us.

"Thank you for your maturity in this. As we are all too well aware, healthy sexual activities require maturity and selflessness, things most young people—and many not so young—seem to be lacking. That leads to situations that are harmful." A sudden pained look crossed his face as he said this, but just as quickly as it appeared, it was gone. "Please, please, please be wise."

The plan was for Mrs. Spurlock to drive us to the mall and pick us up later that afternoon. We'd do some shopping and eat lunch. We'd part ways and spend Christmas Eve with our respective families. I was invited to come back to the Spurlocks' for Christmas dinner the next evening.

We travelled in silence for a few minutes before Mrs. Spurlock broke the silence.

"Your father only wants you to be safe, Shay," she said, as she looked at us through the rearview mirror.

Shay grunted. "I AM being safe! Brody's safe, Dad even said so. Why does he treat me like I'm going to sleep with everyone I come in contact with?"

"I'm not so sure he's as worried about who you CHOOSE to have sex with, as he is about putting yourself in situations where you don't get to choose at all."

"I've learned my lesson. Does he honestly think I'd put myself in that situation again?" Shay's lip began to quiver, so I squeezed her hand tighter. "I'm not stupid."

"He knows that, Honey," Mrs. Spurlock replied. "Please try to see it from his perspective. He felt so helpless and was so angry with himself after Thanksgiving, so much so that he acted irrationally in the aftermath. He hasn't entirely forgiven himself for not protecting you that night, nor for reacting the way he did."

Shay sighed. "Well, you think he would at least be willing to compromise or something."

"Trust me, Honey. This is a compromise. If he had his way, you'd never go out. Believe me when I say he is scared to death that something else will happen to you. I practically had to swear a blood oath that Brody would take care of you." I saw her eyes in the rearview mirror flicker to me. She looked back at the road and chuckled. "A part of him is just so glad that Brody has swept you off your feet."

I couldn't help but smile at that. However, when I glanced over at Shay, she was scowling.

"What's wrong?" I asked quietly.

"He's only glad you came along because you are better option than Mia," she said, loud enough for her mom to hear.

"Shay, that's not true!" Mrs. Spurlock exclaimed, then settled a little. "At least, not entirely."

"I knew it," Shay hissed.

"Shay, your father is conservative and a traditionalist. Part of him still holds out hope that you will eventually come to your senses and conform to his views. Still, he loves you and will ultimately accept the choices you make if they truly make you happy."

I decided to interrupt. "Mrs. Spurlock, you said that Mia wasn't only reason your husband was glad I'm here. What else is there?"

She didn't answer right away, but I noticed her eyes tearing up. "After we learned what happened to Shay, he became so scared that the experience would make it hard for Shay to be comfortable with intimacy and sex, something that's common for girls who have experienced what she did. We've both been amazed and pleased at how well Shay has come through this. That you two had sex is another sign to him that she is healing."

I looked at Shay again, and her expression kind of pissed me off. She was still scowling and had her arms crossed under her breasts. It was like she was refusing to hear anything her mom was saying. Shay was so sure that her dad was just some mean, unbending, ogre and only wanted to keep Mia away from her, that she wouldn't even listen to what I felt was a reasonable explanation for his actions. I wanted to say something to her, but I wasn't sure what.

We were all quiet for most of the rest of the drive. As we pulled next to the curb in front of the mall, Shay let out a dramatic sigh.

"I just wish Dad wasn't so restrictive," she said, in disgust.

Mrs. Spurlock turned to look back at her daughter. She had a warm smile on her face. "Yes, well, you wouldn't be the first teenager to have to live with restrictions, nor will you be the last." Her grin broadened. "Nor are you the first to bitch about it either."