Chapter 4

Charles picked me up Saturday morning. He was visibly happy when I answered the door. He gathered my bags and loaded them into the car, while I reassured my family that I would be ok. "Really Sam, This is what I want." I knew he could see it in my eyes, because he backed up and let Charles take my hand. "I'll call you if I need anything. I promise."

"Charles, I expect you to take care of her." Sam laughed, but we all knew it was a real warning. "I'll see you both on Monday morning at the office." I had taken the freelance job with the newspaper, but had promised to help the advertising company with a couple projects next week.

Charles drove to his house, talking the whole way. He proceded to tell me how nice it would be to have company in that big lonely house. The horses needed to be ridden, but he had been lax on their exercise, not wanting to ride alone. The house was in need of a females touch and he could certainly use a home cooked meal now and again that wasn't burnt or undercooked. I found it funny that a man could live alone so long, when he loved to talk this much. It didn't bother me. I loved the sound of his voice. I let him rattle on until we pulled into the drive.

He smiled and looked at me with those beautiful eyes. "We're home" The words hung like a cloud in my mind. 'Home' Other than the farm we grew up on. I don't think I had ever felt this way before. It wasn't just the house, but the company. I took in a long breath, closed my eyes and listened to the sounds around me. "Are you ready to go in?" He was sweet, a big teddy bear of a man. I opened my eyes and smiled at him.

I can't remember smiling this much in Iowa. I was always to afraid to smile.

The house was warm and inviting. We brought my bags to the spare room, my room.

As I unpacked, I thought about all the things I had left behind in storage. Oneday I would have to return to get them. Maybe when I had my own place. After all, I could stay here forever. Could I... ?

Months had gone by and we had stayed true to our word. We were friends living in the same house. Nothing more and certainly nothing less. I could not say that I loved this man, but I could honestly say that I loved everything about him so far. I loved his gentle voice, his caring nature, his humor, I even loved the way he needed me. He was not perfect, not by a long shot. He could not cook, he took his job a very seriously, and he was easily stressed, as he felt he needed to be perfect. Some times he let his mistakes eat away at him like a poison. While these things would occasionally cause us to argue, I knew it would be up to me to reassure him and return his confidence to him. It was a job I became accustomed to and even enjoyed.

One evening as we ate dinner, I noticed that he was unusually quiet. I tried repeatedly to get him to open up to me. And yet he still held something back. We finished our meal, and I stood to clear the dishes. I felt his hand wrap tenderly around my wrist. He looked up at me. His eyes were sad and I thought that he might be close to tears. I instinctively dropped to my knees beside him. "What is it Babe? What aren't you telling me?" I placed my hand on the side of his face, caressing his cheek with my thumb. "You know that you can tell me anything."

"You have your job at the paper. In fact, you are quite successful. I hear everyone talking about your incredible photos." I was confused. I had thought that my success was a good thing. "Sam says you will be looking for your own apartment soon." He pushed his face deeper into my hand. "You will be leaving me."

Sam was trying to soften the blow for Charles. He wanted to remind him that one day I may leave. "Sam was wrong," saying my thoughts out loud I had even managed to surprise myself. But it was true. I had not even considered leaving. "I will stay with you as long as you will have me." I stretched up to kiss him on the cheek, as friends would. He turned to meet my kiss and held me there. Lips touching, no tongues lapping at each other. Just a kiss. It took my breath away.

"Would you share my bed tonight? I need to feel you beside me." He paused before adding, "I just want to hold you while we sleep."

We finished clearing the table and filled the dish washer in silence. I marveled at the tenderness and sensitive nature of this big strong man, that had become my protector, my hero. All man, and yet soft enough to know how to make me feel needed. No, he did not just make me feel needed. Needs are things one must have to survive, not necessarily enjoyed. He wanted me. He chose me to be with him. This man could have any woman cook and clean for him. I've seen many women, giggle and flirt with him. Beautiful women tease him and try to get his attention. But he chose me. I was more than the damsel in distress on the side of the road. More than someone to cure his 'dry spell'. I was the one who nearly brought him to tears at the thought of him leaving.

We curled in his bed watching the evening news. As the news ended, he clicked the remote and settled in next to me. Drifting out of consciousness I thought I heard a soft voice whisper in my ear. "I do love you Dee." His lips touched my neck as I resigned to my sleep.

Upon waking in the morning, I found myself alone in his bed. The shower was running and I knew he was getting ready to head off to work. I pulled my self together and dragged my tired body to my own room. Getting my clothes together, I thought about the last words I had heard. Was it just my wishful thinking or did he really say that he loved me? I stepped into my own shower and let the hot water pour over my body. I knew I would have to hurry to get to my photo shoot in Tacoma. I would be documenting the opening of a new assisted living center. And the last thing you want to do is make elderly people wait on you.

My day dragged on, seemingly uneventful. I had wonderful shots of Grandparents playing with their grandkids on the centers park like grounds. Pictures of the spacious rooms, and occupants meeting their new neighbors. I had nearly filled my memory card, when I turned to leave. That's when I saw them. They set on a bench gazing into each others eyes, smiling and laughing. They had to be in their late eighties, but they were in love. I snapped a couple of shots before they noticed me. I strolled up to them with a great need to hear their story. Inviting me to join them, I sound that her name was Emily and his was Edger. Their story was right out of a romantic fairy tale. They were in love with different people when they first met. Emily was married and Edger engaged. Time went on and they became good friends. At the age of forty, Emily lost her husband in an accident. Edger lost his wife three years later. They resisted their love for many years, until Edger had a stroke. "I nearly lost him." she said shaking. "I knew I couldn't let another moment go by without telling him." She giggled like a school girl. "Turns out, he had fallen in love with me, too." They both laughed and rubbed noses.

"We just got married last year." piped Edger. "Technically we are still newly weds." He elbowed her gently, and the giggles began again.

I thanked them for their story and walked away. Looking back I saw him reach over and tickle her. I couldn't help but think about them as I drove home. This couple is so happy together and they wasted so much precious time denying their feelings. It was a shame.