Chapter 35: Half Way to Heaven

All told, we must have watched that movie at least six times. Each time it was played we saw some new detail we'd missed the last time, a certain look Charlotte gave at a certain point, or a certain hand gesture, a sparkle in my eye. It was wonderful. None of us were getting tired of watching it either, which was odd, considering it was only a few minutes long—five at the most.

Somewhere in the replays however, we looked up and saw that Mick and Janine were gone. We hadn't even noticed them leave, but they had apparently wandered downstairs for some beautiful love-making of their own. I leaned over, looked down the basement stairs, and saw Janine sensuously bobbing up and down on Mick's erection. They were on the bed with the lights dimmed. I said as much to the remaining folks upstairs and they giggled, sighed, and grinned.

Then we watched it again.

Charlotte was clinging to me like a drowning woman clings to a life preserver. She held my arm tight, kissing my shoulder over and over and over again, shaking her head in quiet awe, and then hugging me tightly. And she kept whispering in my neck, more to herself it seemed, than to me:

"I love you so much. I love you so, so much. Oh my god, I love you so much..."

It felt so good to hear her say that, especially after the near catastrophe we'd come through in our short little love life. I turned every once in a while and kissed her on the forehead. And the movie played on.

"You notice how the pan slows when the curve of Charlotte's waist dips low, and speeds up when it comes to her hip again?" Steve said, pointing with eager fingers at the screen.

I hadn't noticed that, but I nodded. It was a cool effect.

"Sheila did that in editing. The original pan was smooth as butter. I swear! Awesome..."

"Looks cool though," I said.

"Definitely!"

Steve was grinning and talking excitedly, like he was reviewing some famous Hollywood director or something. Amy was meanwhile astonished. She'd only found out we were even doing this thing less than 48 hours before. Now here we were in larger-than-life color. It was amazing to watch. We were all dazed.

Steve was the next to leave. He got up slowly while the credits rolled after a few more reviews and looked over at Charlotte and I. He seemed happy.

"I should get going. Mom's been wondering where I've been all week. Since we're done now, I guess I can go."

"Is everything all cleaned up and reset down there?" I asked.

"Yup. All the footage is on the hard drive here, and all the system settings have been returned to the way they were. I wrote them all down before we started. I cleaned the Trashcan of all deleted files, and deleted us from all the recently used document lists. Everything's clean. I even moved the cameras back to point in the same directions they were pointing before we started. I think Janine even washed the sheets, just in case."

"That's awesome, Steve. Thanks, man."

"You're welcome. It was fun."

"So this is the hard drive here? This is everything?"

There was a little white object on the coffee table, about the size of a Kraft Dinner box. It apparently contained the hours and hours of footage of Charlotte and I fucking and sucking and licking in every possible way.

"Yup. We just plugged one of them in before we started and worked off of it. Then we just popped it out and here it is."

"Cool."

Charlotte was kissing my neck now and I was getting mind-boggling little shivers all over.

"I love you so fucking much..." she whispered, not hearing a word Steve said.

"Well, I'm gonna go. Don't be a stranger around school."

He headed for the door.

"Steve," I said.

"Yeah?"

"There are no other copies? Just the one DVD and the hard drive?"

"That's all Sheila made, as far as I know. You'll have to ask her."

"Kay. Cool. Thanks man."

"Nice to meet you, Amy," Steve said. And then he was gone.

Amy was watching the movie again, rewinding and replaying Charlotte's final speech about how love is really about finding yourself. I watched her watching it. She looked entranced, like she was sitting at the feet of some prophet, hearing a message from God or something. Then she'd rewind it again, and play it once more.

It was after the third time that I finally noticed she wasn't even really hearing the words. Up on the screen was a shot of me smiling happily at Charlotte, and leaning over to kiss her on the cheek right as Charlotte said " ... no matter who we have in our lives..." and the camera panned down Charlotte's curves as my hand slid slowly off her shoulder and down her waist to her hip. " ... love won't make you suddenly flawless and perfect but it'll take away your fear..."

Amy was watching my hand on screen. Amy was watching my eyes. Amy was watching my smile. She didn't look sad or upset, but she didn't look happy either. She looked like she was seeing something, something I'd missed. It made me curious.

"Getting' tired of staring at us yet, Aims?" I asked.

She slowly raised her palms to her cheeks and slapped them onto her face as though finally getting something. What though?

"Look," she said. "Don't you see that?"

"See what?"

My hand was caressing Charlotte's chin now. Then the camera did a slow zoom into our faces.

"What do you see, Amy?" Charlotte asked. Now she was curious too. She turned away from my neck and looked at the TV. Amy looked at us like we were both blind and crazy. But then her confused look faded and she just stared at us for a moment, sitting there on the couch, almost on top of one another.

"What?" Charlotte asked after a moment. "What do you see?"

"Nothing," Amy said. "It's just a really nice movie."

But there was a tear in her eye all of a sudden. What the hell?

"You okay, Aims?" I asked.

"I'm alright. You know what? I get it now. It all makes sense."

"What!? What do you get?" Charlotte said. "You're confusing me!"

"Me too."

"Don't worry about it," Amy replied. "Everything's gonna be okay in the end."

Funny. That's what Sheila had said.

"So why are you crying?" Charlotte asked.

"I don't know. The movie's just so beautiful I guess. You guys are beautiful. It all makes sense now."

"I've definitely missed something," I said.

"Yes you have. But it's alright. I think you were meant to miss it. I think she knew. I think she planned it that way."

"She? You mean Sheila? What did she plan?"

"Never mind. It's alright, you guys."

But she was still crying. Not sobbing or anything, but tears were flowing down her cheeks. She was smiling, nibbling her finger, looking awed, awed at some secret Sheila had planted in the movie that everyone except Charlotte and I could apparently see.

"Alright, if you insist. Maybe we'll figure it out later."

"Maybe you never will. It's alright though. It was meant to be."

"Okay..." Charlotte said, raising an eyebrow and scanning my face to see if I knew what the hell was going on. I didn't.

"I'm gonna go upstairs and call my mom. You two probably want some privacy anyway."

"What I really want is to watch this movie a few more times," Charlotte said. "I'm feeling like an idiot here, not seeing something that's obvious to you."

"Just look at how beautiful you two look. That's all you need to know."

"I still don't get it," I said. "But we'll figure it out."

Amy sighed, long and happy. She just stared at us for a moment more. Then she smiled.

"Sheila is so awesome."

Then she disappeared up the stairs. Charlotte and I were alone.

"Do you have any idea what she's talking about?" Charlotte asked me. She rewound the movie to the part Amy was watching and we both watched it again.

"No clue, Char."

"We do look absolutely beautiful though, don't we? This is everything I dreamed it would be, and a thousand times more."

"It's amazing how she can say so much without even showing any privates or anything X-rated."

"I was amazed! The girl really is a genius."

"Absolutely."

"But what's this big mystery? Are we just idiots?"

"I guess."

"We definitely got a reaction out of Mick and Janine, that's for sure."

"And Steve apparently."

"I'm sure he's rushing home to jerk himself dry of every drop of fluid he's got."

"I'm glad he was so cool about everything."

"Me too."

Then the movie was done once again and it went into stop again. Suddenly Charlotte was lit in the blue light of the DVD player's menu screen. We just stared at one another for the longest time, sometimes smiling, sometimes looking frightened, sometimes sad, but mostly awed.

"I still say you look most beautiful in real life, right in front of me," I said.

"Very same ... me ... much ... feel ... can't even speak though. Sorry."

I leaned in a pressed my lips onto hers. Her eyes didn't close, her lips didn't purse. They were just soft, warm, and accepting, and her breath tasted sweet as honeyed flowers. She whimpered this little half-gasp, squeaky little whimper, as though overwhelmed with awe all over again. She still didn't close her eyes, and neither did I. We just pressed our lips together and gazed, tasting one another's breath.

Then I reached out with my tongue and softly, gently touched the tip of hers. My insides were instantly flooded, awash with every emotion a man can experience in one single moment—fear, desire, gratitude, contentment, hunger, pride, arousal, lust. There were tinges of anger and sadness in there too I think, but they were drowned out in the overall waves of goodness and purity.

And we were barely even kissing. I felt the slightest tremble of her tongue against mine, and mine against hers, barely even perceptible, but definitely there. We breathed and gazed, and sat still. Her hands were on mine, mine were on her thighs. Then she slowly pulled away.

"When we were dancing on Friday," she said. "I honestly thought it was all over. I've never felt so horrible in all my life. I thought I'd lost that thing you do to me forever. I thought I'd killed it. I was trying so hard to convince myself that everything would be alright, that I could just go back to being wild and free, but it just felt wrong somehow. Guys kept hitting on me and I was trying to decide which one I might wanna get with or whatever, just to get back to the old me, you know? But everything felt wrong inside me."