Cw - How Do I Live Without You?
by Dr Know
Copyright© 2009 by Dr Know
Ralph's Story -
I sat in my pickup truck listening to my favorite country music station as I watched the house at the end of the cul-de-sac down the street. My truck was partially in the darkness outside of the cone of light thrown down by the streetlamp. Nobody could see into the truck's cab, so I could keep watch with no worry of being seen.
The radio was playing LeAnne Rimes' How Do I Live Without You. It was very apropos as to my current situation. I listened to the refrain with a tear blurring my eye.
And tell me now,
How do I live without you?
I want to know,
How do I breathe without you?
If you ever go,
How do I ever, ever survive?
How do I, how do I, oh how do I live?
My name's Ralph. Let me go back five years to when all of this started.
It all started in Cincinnati where my first wife, Cheryl, and I had lived. I caught her playing put-the-dick-in-the-cunt with my best friend, Chad. I'd had his snorkeling gear in my pickup's small rear seat for several months. I'd just closed a deal to rewire the electrical systems at a home not far from his place, so I figured I would swing by in hopes he was home. If not, I had a key that he had given me to watch after the place when he was away on his various business trips. I could let myself in and dump the gear in his garage.
As I pulled up in front of his house I saw something that made my heart stop. My wife's car was parked next to his in the driveway. The reason I became immediately suspicious was that very morning Cheryl had told me she was driving to Columbus on business for her firm and would not be back until very late in the evening.
I got out of my truck, quietly made my way to Chad's front door and used my key. All was quiet as I gently closed the door with as little sound as I could make. I listened for several seconds and then heard the sound that tore out my heart. It was the unmistakable sound made by Cheryl as she was about to cum. I then detected a male grunting sound. The noises came from upstairs.
I slowly made my way up the steps and tiptoed down the hall to the door where the sounds were emanating. I heard Cheryl's voice as I reached the door. "Oh yes, please, fuck me harder! Deeper! Fuck me deeper! Give it to me! Oh, shit, you're so much better than Ralph. He can't do these things to me. I won't let him. Only you can take my ass."
The door was slightly ajar and I simply pushed it open. There on Chad's king size bed was my wife with her ass in the air and Chad rocking back and forth sawing his dick into her rectum. There was dried cum all over her face and hair. The place stank of sex. Sitting across the room in a chair was Cheryl's boss, Mr. Gleason, masturbating as he watched Chad ram in and out of Cheryl.
Gleason's prick immediately started deflating when I yelled, "What the fuck is going on here? What the hell are you bastards doing? Cheryl, what the hell is this? What are you doing fucking these guys?"
Cheryl began crying and screaming, "Oh god, oh god ... it's not what you think, I can explain. Let me get dressed and let me talk..."
I cut her off yelling, "Not what I think? How the hell do you know what I think?" I stopped to draw a breath and saw Chad had backed away and was slipping on his pants. Gleason just stood there with his limp dick displayed.
I took a breath and went on as loud as I could, "Want to know what I think? I think Chad and I better never cross paths again unless he wants to die." I saw him blanch because he knows I carry a shotgun in my pickup.
I pointed at Gleason and roared, "I also think I'm going to own the fucking company you work for when they find out my wife is being fucked by her boss."
I turned my rage to my wife quivering in shame on the bed. "And finally, you want to know what I think? I think you better not come back home. Find somewhere to stay. Maybe here with Chad, eh, old buddy? Or go with Gleason and share his house with his wife and kids. Or better yet go sell your cheating ass on the street. I'll be putting your stuff in garbage bags that you and your fuck buddies here can help you haul off."
Chad had been making his way slowly toward me as I went off on each of them. I knew he was doing it and expected he thought he could jump me and overpower me while I was ranting at Cheryl. Little did he know what awaited his poorly thought out next move. He knew I had been in the Army, but I'd never said Special Forces or what that meant.
When he sprang at me, I turned my body forty-five degrees and as he went by me, he hit my cheek with a glancing blow. I absorbed the punch and karate chopped him along the base of his neck. Down he went with a moan. I was so full of rage; I turned him over and kicked him square in the balls. Several times, if I remember.
I know he was throwing up as I turned to leave the room. I saw a video camera on a tripod in the corner of the room with the record light on. These assholes were recording their repugnant activities! I went over and grabbed the camera and ripping it off the stand, made my way back to my truck.
I stumbled back to my truck and felt my stomach contents churn their way toward my mouth. After throwing up I sat in the cab for what could have been five minutes crying heavily as I felt my loss and my wrath build.
I heard noises and saw Gleason running out with his pants on but his shirt still unbuttoned and flapping in the wind as he ran. A few minutes later an EMS rescue vehicle arrived. I got a grip on my emotions and drove off before the cops showed up. I was sure they would arrest me for assaulting Chad.
Sure enough, I'd been home less than an hour when the police arrived and arrested me. I had new locks in my truck because part of my company did locksmith work. I changed out the door locks in less than ten minutes placing a new house key in the magnetic box I kept under my truck's fender.
I'd made good use of my time and threw all of Cheryl's clothes and everything from her drawers and makeup table out into the front yard. I then turned on the yard sprinkler system. And finally, I hid the video camera in spot behind an old lawn mower in my garden shed. I threw a canvas tarp over the mower. The camera was as hidden as I could make it.
When the cops arrived, I told them I would come with them peacefully and make a statement. They let me lock the house and put the key under the doormat for Cheryl. Actually I placed the old house key under the mat and palmed the copy of new one that now resided under my truck's fender.
I asked them if we could walk out to the police car without cuffs so as not to give the neighbors cause for rumors. The cops had been at Chad's and were aware of what had happened. They had sympathy for me and agreed not to cuff me. As we neared the car, one of the cops opened the rear door as I turned to the other one and asked how Chad was.
He opened his notepad and read what he had on his condition. I really didn't give a shit about his condition. I just wanted to divert the guy's attention long enough to drop the new house key in the thick grass along the curb.
Now Cheryl had no way to get in the house without drilling out the locks. She would have to deal with all of her personal possessions being strewn around the yard wet from the continuing watering. I'd not turned the watering system off when I left with the police.
When I got to the police station I asked for my lawyer. He showed about two hours later. I told him I was going to plea innocent by reason of temporary insanity. I told him where to find the video camera. I also told him I wanted divorce papers drawn up at once. Ohio allows adultery as cause for divorce and if the video tape supported my claims of her wanton adultery, it would be a slam dunk.
We then sat with the two cops for an hour as I gave them my statement. They eyed each other on occasion as if to say, "I'd probably have down the same thing."
It turns out Cheryl had been brought back to the house by her father. She was in no condition to drive so her car still sat in Chad's driveway. I'm sure she made up a good story to tell her folks on why her car was at Chad's — during the day — with another man present — and her husband not knowing.
She shrieked and fell to her knees when saw all of her stuff drenched and scattered around the yard. She went to door with her purse and tried her key. It didn't work. She looked under the mat and saw the key. She thought, good, the cops made him leave the new key. At least he can't lock me out. She picked up the key and tried it. It didn't work!
It was now almost dark. She and her father spent the time the last few hours of daylight picking up her personal stuff then she rode to her folks' house for the night. Tomorrow she would straighten this out. Ralph's just going to have to listen to me. I'll post bail and he'll have to listen.
The lawyer went to the house the next morning and found the video camera. He watched the tape's content and met me in a meeting room at the jail as soon as visiting hours started. He smiled at me and said, "It's a slam dunk. The camera caught everything. She has been doing this with Chad for almost six months. Apparently her boss found out about it and threatened to tell you unless she gave in to him, too. He also threatened Chad with telling you unless he could participate."
"I'd say you have a great case against Gleason that will get a tidy sum out of your wife's company. Oh, yes, as I reviewed the tape, I saw Chad try to jump you. I'm sure I can make case that you had shown remarkable constraint with being faced with the whole situation until he tried to jump you. A clear case of temporary insanity after being so provoked. Oh yes, I think you can go after him for assault."
With that the wheels were sat in motion. The last thing I'd done before the cops had shown up at my house was I'd logged into our online banking and transferred all of the savings and all but $3000 of the checking to my business account. My foreman and I are the only two who can write checks on that account. I signed a power of attorney for my lawyer and he canceled all of my joint credit cards with Cheryl. By the time I was arraigned and bail was set, it was late in the day. She could not raise bail until tomorrow.
She was shocked to find out about the bank accounts funds transfers when she checked to see how much money was available for the bail bondsman to post my bail.
The next day she came to see me and yelled at me that I was being unfair and hadn't given her a chance to explain things. I held up my hand and just said, "Be here tomorrow at one o'clock. My lawyer will escort you to a room here at the jail where we can all talk."
I contacted my lawyer and told him what I wanted. He agreed and would be at the jail before one o'clock. He also told me that Chad had lost one testicle and possibly the other might have to be removed. He also told me he and Chad's lawyer had reviewed the tape and it was in everyone's interest for Chad not to pursue his charges if I would not pursue mine. I agreed but made it clear that would be in Chad's best interest for him to decide to move somewhere else. Like maybe Australia.
The charges would be dropped by tomorrow afternoon. Until then I was the guest of the State of Ohio. So the next day at one o'clock, my lawyer and my soon to be ex-wife met in one of the small rooms reserved for lawyer to prisoner communications.
Cheryl started in, "Ralph, I'm so sorry. Those things you heard me say to Chad were just so much bullshit. He liked to hear me run you down and make him fell like the better man. I love you. It's only sex with Chad."
I raised my hand and stopped her. "No more. I've got something for you to watch." I pointed to my lawyer who flipped on the video. There on the screen was Cheryl coming in Chad's bedroom with Chad's armed draped over her shoulder and playing with her right breast. Trotting in behind them was Gleason.
As they watched the video, they heard Cheryl laugh, "My god you two are horny today. Give a girl a change to get naked before you screw her! I've been waiting for this all week. Ralph is such a piece of dog shit in the sack. I just love getting fucked by the two of you. I hope you plan to DP me today. I just love that full feeling. It's so evil and exciting."
They heard Chad, as he began to play with her breasts, say, "So Ralph can't meet you needs, my fine little slut?"
"No way. He's such a dufus in bed. I'd love to try and teach him some of this stuff we do, but it would make him suspicious. He's a boring lover, but he is my boring lover. I do love him, but I need this wanton sex you guys give me. Now shut up and start working on me."
With that the scene became one of naked seething bodies. Most of the possible positions of the Kuma Sutra had to on the video.
I waved to my lawyer to flip it off. "So Cheryl, what is it you want this dufus to understand? That I can't satisfy you? Or Chad and Gleason are much better sex partners than I am? That you LOVE me?
You have sex with other men, so you can't possibly respect me. If you have no respect for someone, you could never possibly love that someone. Now, I'm filing for divorce under the grounds of adultery. I want to take everything but my lawyer tells me that even as slimy as you are, the court will want you to have at least 25%. So that is my offer, and be damn glad I just want this over quickly and get your cheating ass out of my sight."
With that I got up and called the guard to take me back to my cell. As I left I saw my attorney hand Cheryl her walking papers. Later that day I was released as Chad had dropped his charges and I reciprocated.
That day at the jail was also the last time I saw or talked to Cheryl. At least, until one year ago. But let me finish bringing you up to date before telling about how Cheryl came back into my life.
I'd made a fairly good success out of a little business. I now employed four electricians and two general service maintenance men that performed a wide variety of projects for people with older homes needing upgrades. Since the economy had gone down the dumper people stayed in their current homes instead of moving up to a newer home. So many people now did add-ons and renovations to their existing homes. My company provides services to these clients.
For several years after my marriage to Cheryl had imploded, I didn't want much to do with women. Oh, I still went out and would seize on a woman giving me the eye for one night stand and then promise to call and immediately throw her phone number away.
Then one day I met "her". Francine was her name. A pretty little 5 foot 4 inch brunette with a great body and three degrees from institutions of higher learning. Smart, beautiful, sexy -- and seemingly interested in me. I was attending a trade show in Las Vegas on new "must have" electrical items every home needed. Actually they were all mostly bullshit but, with a 100% markup in the Manufacturers' Suggested Retail Price, a small company such as mine could make easy money from selling these items to a homeowner during renovation.
I was standing at one booth listening to a manufacturer's rep spouting horse manure about how their new air filtration system was indispensable in the modern world with its terrible air pollution problems. Suddenly, I heard a soft female voice next to me say, "What a bag full of goose crap. This guy is a real ass."
I turned and looked into the prettiest pair of brown eyes I'd ever seen. These eyes were set into the most beautiful face I'd ever seen. When she smiled her face lit up and my heart skipped a beat. She pointed at the man speaking and stated, "He's doesn't know his ass from his elbow. Half of his facts are wrong and the other have are suspect. I wouldn't sell one of these systems to my worst enemy."
I smiled back at her and replied, "I agree. He lost me as a customer when he misstated the atmosphere carbon increase percentages."
She stared at me and said, "My, you know those stats? Very impressive."
I impulsively asked, "Would you like to do some lunch?"
She seemed to hesitate. I continued on the offensive, "My name is Ralph Larson. I own a small electrician and home renovation company. And you are?"
She smiled extending her hand, "My name's Francine Doyle. I'm an architect. I design homes for the super rich."
We shook hands and then I repeated, "So Francine. How about some lunch? This hotel has a superb Wolfgang Puck's."
She smiled again and stated, "Well, I am hungry. Are we going Dutch treat?"
"Sure. We'll split the check." I replied.
"Then Mr. Ralph Larson, let's go." She said as she wrapped her arm through mine.
We had a pleasant lunch and began to know each other. I found out about her family with her three brothers and two sisters. I found out about her failed marriage. He'd cheated on her. She found out about my family of one sister. She learned about my failed marriage but none of the real gory details. We found out that we lived less than fifty miles apart.
I asked her to dinner but she said she already had plans. My heart dropped. She asked for a rain check until tomorrow night. My heart soared. "Okay, we'll go to the Pamplemousse Restaurant. It's a Las Vegas landmark and has a highly rated French cuisine." She gave me her hotel name and I told her I would pick her up at seven.
When she came down from her room to meet me in the lobby the next night, I was floored. She wore that "little black dress" you hear so much about. We had a wonderful time at dinner and then later at one of the all night dance clubs that Vegas is so famous for. From that night on we were an item. In our case, the phrase "what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas" didn't apply.
That night she invited me back to her room and we made slow sweet love. The scent of sex wafted through the room and increased the intensity of our couplings. We blew off the trade show the next day and the next. We would come up for air and order room service to regain our strength then plunge back into intense sex.
She blew me and swallowed my load several times, I ate her out to orgasm many times, we fucked tenderly and then roughly loving the intense feelings we achieved from both techniques.
Upon returning home, we were rarely apart for more than a couple of days at a time when one or the other of us has schedules that did not permit us to stay at each other's house. Ten months later we made it official and became engaged. The wedding was set for June. It was announced in the newspaper.
Two weeks later, Cheryl re-enter our lives. I say our lives since Francine and I were now all but married.
I was pretty much a creature of habit. Each morning on the way to my office, I would stop at the local coffee shop and have toast and coffee as I caught up on the news. On this particular Monday morning I'd just sat down with my newspaper and breakfast when I heard a familiar voice, "Hello Ralph."
My body went tense. I'd know that voice anywhere. Cheryl! I looked up with the coldest stare I could muster. "What the fuck do you want you damn slut?"
She seemed undeterred, "Can I sit down for five minutes? I've got to say some things and I promise it'll only take me five minutes. Please?" She pleaded in an almost terrified tone, "I've been seeing mental health professionals and they say I have to try to get you to forgive me before I can forgive myself and start healing. I'd like to explain what happened and why it happened and seek that forgiveness from you."
I replied incredulously, "Do you seriously think I give a shit about what the state of your mental health is? Do you think I could ever forgive you for turning yourself into a cheating slut? I tell you what you bitch. I'll give you ten minutes to say your piece. If you promise to leave my life and never let me see you're cheating face again. Deal?"
"Okay." She answered in a quivering voice.
I stare at her. She was still a beautiful woman. Beautiful green eyes, red hair, and good figure.
She sat down and clasped her hands together trying to gather her thoughts. Several moments passed in silence and I finally said in an exasperated tone, "Well, you've wasted thirty seconds of your ten minutes. Either talk or walk. I really don't care which you do."
She inhaled startled by my sharp voice. She started. "First Ralph, I apologize to you for the hurt and pain I know you felt. I desire every bit of hatred and anger you want to heap on me. I fucked up big time back then and it took my world collapsing to realize it. When you walked in the bed room door that day my own heart was stabbed knowing what I had done to you. You, my poor innocent husband, who never did anything but love me."
She took a breath and continued, "Chad and I started going to lunch and then dinner when you were out of town. At first he was just being a friend to keep me company on those lonely periods when you were traveling. Then one night, we had gone to a nice restaurant for dinner then on to a night spot for some dancing.
I had no intent on cheating on you that night; it was really just friends going out for some fun. And he was your best friend so I felt very safe with him. We both had too much to drink and in the cab on the way back to our house, we looked in each others' eyes and seemed to be drawn to a kiss. At first it was tentative but then it became almost sinful in its intensity.
I felt butterflies in my stomach as Chad moved his hand to my breast. I was horny as hell and he felt so good. His tongue probed my mouth and he smelled sweet and manly. At that moment I just wanted to be fucked. We stumbled in our house and I pulled him by his hand to our bedroom.
It wasn't an intentional cuckolding mind you. It just seemed normal to go to our bedroom. We stripped each other, fell onto the bed, and had sex for what seemed like hours. It probably wasn't because we were so drunk I'm sure we passed out shortly after our second coupling."
She stopped waiting for me to say something. I didn't, I was biting my tongue just wanting her to go away.
"When we woke up the next morning we were both in a panic. We had both cheated on you -- me as your wife and he as your best friend. We jumped out of bed and covered ourselves from each other and mumbled apologies and promised it would never happen again.
Chad called a cab and left and I showered for over an hour trying to wash the smell of cheating off of my body. You came home that afternoon and I attacked you with make-up loving for weeks trying to make amends for what Chad and I had done. After several weeks had gone by and you seemed to have no idea what had happened, Chad and I both relaxed and things seemed to back to normal."
"Chad and I had stopped meeting for lunch and dinner after that episode. We were still cordial to each other when we were around each other, but we were embarrassed about what had happened and didn't know ho to deal with it."
Cheryl stopped and asked if she could have a sip of the coffee I had as her throat was dry. I pushed the cup over to her without a word and waited.
She took several sips and, with a sigh, started again, "At your birthday party Chad and I ended up alone in the kitchen as I was putting the candles on your cake and he was filling guests drink orders. He looked over at me and said, "Cheryl, we've got to talk about what happened and figure out how to rebuild our friendship. I want us to remain friends but we can't hurt Ralph. So can we get together for lunch next week and talk things out?" I thought for moment and agreed because if things continued as they were you would figure something was wrong just be the way Chad and I tried to avoid each other."
"So the next Tuesday I met Chad at diner close to his office for lunch. He'd taken the rest of the day off work so we could talk things out. After lunch we walked in the park for an hour and then a thunderstorm came up and we had to run to Chad's car to get out of the downpour. We were soaked and our teeth were chattering. He suggested we drive to his place and dry our clothes and finish our talk. I stupidly agreed."
She stopped and looked at the palms of her hands for a moment. Gulping, she started again, "Ralph, I went there believing we would dry off, finish our talk and find someway to put what had happened in the past so we could all be friends again. What happened at Chad's that afternoon is a little blurry.
When we got there, I remember him throwing me his bathrobe in the guest bedroom and telling me to strip and him going to the other bedroom put on dry clothes. He then took our wet clothes and threw them in his dryer. He fixed us some drinks and we sat down on the couch to finish our conversation as our clothes dried."
"It was about twenty minutes after we sat down that I started feeling flushed and things seemed to be getting a little hazy. Another ten minutes and I started feeling hornier than I had in years. Chad looked at my flushed face and taking the drink glass from my hand he sat it on the coffee table.
He leaned over and kissed me. Not easy but brutally hard. As he did this, his hand slipped under the robe I was wearing and he groped my breasts. Remember Ralph, I was getting hornier by the second. He admitted to me months later that he'd put a GHB-based cocktail of drugs into my drink."
"He pealed the robe from my body and had his hands all over me. I was getting hotter and hotter and finally just gave into the sensations he was arousing in me. He led me to his bedroom and laid me on the bed.
He wasted no time with preliminaries by opening my legs and placing his penis at my opening. The head slid in passed my pussy's lips and he slowly worked in a few inches. He moved back and forth until I was wet and then he rammed his whole length into me in one motion. He sawed back and forth at a more and more rapid pace until he exploded in me. I felt his seed spraying inside me in spurt after spurt.
For the next few hours he took me in my mouth, pussy, and ass. He took pictures of us doing all of these sex acts. He took a video of us together and made me say that he was a much better lover than you were and you were a wimp. I was so screwed up on the drugs he had given me that I'd have said and done anything that day."
"He later told me that after our first encounter he'd fallen in love with me and wanted to get me for himself. He figured that he could use the pictures and video to blackmail me into having sex with him. And it worked. Ralph, I didn't know else what to do. He had all of these nasty pictures of me cheating on you.
I didn't want you hurt so I did what he said. We began meeting once or twice a week when he and I could get away in from our jobs the afternoon. When you were out of town, he stayed at our house and used our bed."
"Mr. Gleason became suspicious that something was going on by the amount of time off I was taking once an afternoon each week. So he followed me to Chad's place one afternoon and figured out what was happening. He threatened me with exposing the whole thing to you unless I put out for him.
I discussed it with Chad. He decided it would be hot to watch me fuck him and another guy at the same time and said to tell Gleason to start joining our sex sessions. I did and he did. Pretty soon it was always the three of us and they used me every way a woman could be used.
I actually got to the point that my body responded to the intense sexual activities. I'm sorry Ralph, but I started to enjoy the afternoons of being a total slut for them. It gave me intense sexual release."
"That's the way things went until the day you walked into Chad's bedroom. I know you heard what I said to those guys and, god forgive me, I meant those words. By that point they were giving me things that you would never be able to.
But Ralph, after I finally got away from them, and got my shit straight, I realized the sexual things they gave me were mere moments of pleasure with nothing in between. You've read stories where the cheating wife says, "Honey, it was just sex." Well Ralph, it's true. It was just sex. No terms of endearment, no love, just the mad rutting of animals."
"I pray that I can gain your forgiveness for what I did to you. Before I can ever heal and move my life forward, I have to forgive myself for being so weak and so unsure of your love that I would not tell you of Chad's blackmail.
Maybe you could have forgiven me back than and we could have worked through it. We'll never know. But Ralph, I've been nearly suicidal ever since you walked in on that scene of Gleason and Chad and me. I've got to get by this some how. Please ... Please, forgive me."
I cleared my throat. I hadn't expected her purging her soul like she had. I don't know if I believed everything she said. You know most people paint the truth in their favor a little. I needed a little time to digest what she had just dumped on me. So to buy time I asked her, "Cheryl why did you show up now and how did you find me?"
She broke a thin smile on her face. It was easy. I didn't know where you had moved to. I set a 'bot up on my internet search engine. Each day the 'bot searched the web for your name.
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