Chapter 9

(Mike)

I woke up feeling better than I had for a long, long time. The reason I felt so good was still asleep, spooning her cute butt into my waist.

Ever since Lisa and I started college, I wake up every morning at five thirty. This morning was no exception, but I don't feel the need to inflict early wake ups on others.

I extricated myself from the bed without waking Kelly, so I could take care of my morning needs.

After making sure Kelly was well tucked in, I padded naked, to the bathroom. I emptied my bladder, and brushed the fuzz off my teeth. Now for the important part. I went in search of the coffee.

I found the can in her freezer. Same place I keep it at home. I set up the pot, and hit the switch to start it brewing. Since Kelly had the same kind of coffee maker as I had at home, I knew it would take about twenty minutes to finish.

I went over to the bedroom door, and looked at the angel still laying there, curled in her bed. Her tousled golden hair, the only thing showing above the blankets in the pre-dawn light, had to be one of the most beautiful things I'd ever seen.

I remembered Kelly saying last night, that she needed to wake up next to me, so she'd 'know it was real.'

I quietly got back into bed, being careful to not let a draft under the covers, and snuggled up against her back.

Of course I fell asleep, again.

When I woke up again, the early morning sunlight was streaming through the windows, highlighting and illuminating a golden halo around Kelly.

She was sitting cross legged on the bed, with her robe around her shoulders, casting a shadow across my face. She was just looking at me.

When she saw that I was awake, she said, quietly, "Thank you. This is the first morning I've woken up since Daniel died, without pain. This is the first time, I've woken actually looking forward for what the day might bring.

I just looked at her a moment, trying to figure out my feelings. "Me, too," I said, with a sense of wonder. "I don't want to say I feel good, but at least I feel alive."

"Exactly." She was still looking at me, studying me. It was like she was trying to create a mental picture of me. "You made coffee. I poured you a cup a few minutes ago. I used milk, I don't have any creamer up here. It's on the nightstand, behind you."

As I reached for the cup, I asked her if she'd stuck her finger in it to sweeten it. Finally, a smile quirked across her lips, and, surprisingly, a blush across her cheeks. Ignoring my question, she said, "I'm glad you came back to bed, Mike. After you made the coffee, I mean."

"You said you needed me here, so I'm here. I love you, Kelly." I sipped my coffee, "Mmm, just right. Thank You."

"Would you like some breakfast? I can make something, or the coffee shop is open."

"How about we go downstairs after a bit. First, how about we talk about where we go from here?"

She sighed, and looked away from me. "Yeah, we need to do that, but I wouldn't mind putting it off." Then she looked back, and, with a catch in her voice, Kelly asked, "Mike, are you going to forget me?"

I saw the tears spring into her eyes, as she asked me that. Kelly looked so scared and forlorn, that I almost spilled my coffee, setting the cup back on the nightstand.

I rolled back and gathered Kelly into my arms. I hugged her into my chest, and started rocking her. "Oh, my darling Kelly, I could never forget you. You already mean more to me than air. Don't you understand? You've given me back my life!"

Kelly was quietly crying as I said this, but, somehow, I could tell that her tears were of relief.

"Kelly, I love you. That can never change. I will always love you, no mater what the future holds for us." I pulled her head back, and made her meet my eyes. "No. Matter. What," I said, with all the conviction I could.

Kelly was fast regaining her composure, and said, "I love you, too, Mike."

"Kelly, I don't ... Are you in love with me?"

Looking a little scared, again, she said, "Mike, I said I love you, but, no, I'm not in love with you..."

"Good," I interrupted, "Because that is how I feel about you, too. Don't get me wrong, it would be very easy for me to fall in love with you, but I feel that's not where we are, or need to be."

Kelly slowly nodded to show agreement with me, so I continued.

"If you are pregnant, we will have to figure out what is best for our child. But, for now, today, let's not worry about it, and just enjoy the fact that we found each other, and that we're alive. Okay?"

"Oh, Mike, that's exactly right. All of it. I was just so frightened that you'd disappear from my life, or, try to tie me down to you, or something. Heck, I can't even say just what I mean. I want you in my life, yes. But at the same time, I need to explore myself a bit. I need to find my place in the world. I just thank God we met."

"Best friends? Lovers, even. But not married ... And, like best friends, Kelly, You know you can call me any time, for anything, and I'll be there. I'll be — how did your Grandmama say it? - Quite peeved, if you don't."

Kelly laughed, "So how am I supposed to do that?"

"I'll give you one of my business cards. It will have all my contact info on it. Cell number, e-mail, the works."

I suddenly noticed that I'd been in every room of Kelly's loft apartment, and I hadn't seen a computer.

"Kelly, don't you have a computer? Aren't you on-line?"

"No, Daniel and I had one at State, but I guess I abandoned it when I didn't go back. I don't even know where it might be by now. I've never been on-line. I never really felt the need."

"How do you do your business? Your inventory, your ordering? Heck, how do you do your payroll?" I shook my head in amazement. "How do you stay in contact with your friends?"

"By phone. I use a service for payroll, and I call my suppliers with my orders." Kelly looked away from me, then, and said, "I don't have any friends other than people that come into the coffee shop. I ... Don't go out. I get up in the morning, and go to work downstairs. After work, I come up here and read, or listen to the radio. Then I go to bed, and do it again the next day."

Kelly looked back at me, again, and said, "It hurt too much to try and do anything else."

"Well, I'll just have to get you set up, then. That's what my company does, after all. I can do that this week end, if you don't mind my coming down to see you."

"You don't need to do that, Mike. Just bring yourself. That's all I'll be looking forward to, anyway."

"Kelly, you need to be on-line. It's the best way for us to stay in contact. You can even finish your college on-line. Best of all, I can write everything off my taxes!"

Kelly grinned at that. "Well, in that case, okay."

"Kelly, I don't know how religious you are. Do you go to church regularly?"

"We used to. Daniel's parents do, but, I haven't, since Daniel died. Why?"

"Because, I feel the need to go to Gods house, and thank Him, personally, for showing you to me. I haven't been to church, other than funerals, since Lisa was diagnosed." I looked at nothing for a moment, then said, "I need to apologize to Him."

"Then we'll go. I'll ask Dad if he wants to go. He'll refuse, though. I don't know when the last time was he went to service. He usually works the Sunday shift so the other cops can go, if they want. Would you mind if I asked Daniel's parents if we can sit with them? That way we'd be sitting with someone I'd be comfortable around, at least."

"No, I don't mind at all. In fact, I think that would be great." I took the opportunity to hug Kelly, again. She felt good in my arms.

"So that's settled, then," I said. "Shall we get ready to have breakfast? I need to get back home, so I can see if there is anything salvageable of my company. I've been ignoring it for the last six months."

"Okay, we can do that, but, I'm buying." Kelly said that last with a defiant look to her eyes.

"Oh, no argument, there. It's your place, after all."

It felt disgusting, to be putting on yesterdays clothes. Going 'commando' helped some, but I really wanted clean clothes.

While I was waiting for Kelly, I got out one of my business cards, and wrote all my numbers and addresses on the back. I needed to get her numbers, too. I wondered if she even had a cell phone. I'd have to get her one of those, too.

I grabbed my cell, and called the order line at my company. I left a message for Jules, my sys-op / system builder to start putting together a top of the line system, maxed out on memory and hard drives. I wanted it shipped for arrival no later than Friday. I wanted it here, for me to install Saturday.

Then I called my office manager's desk. I left Jennifer a message that I'd be in late, not to worry. I also asked her to make sure everyone was in the office, after noon, so that we could have a meeting when I got there.

Kelly came out, ready to face the day. She was dressed much the same as yesterday, except that her blouse was an old ivory color. "Shall we?" Kelly asked.

"After you, my dear," I replied.

We went down the other set of stairs, and out the front door. When we entered the coffee shop, it was a madhouse. It looked like every seat in the place was taken.

A waitress came up, greeted us, and said, "Kelly, your grandmother is holding a table for you and your guest. She told me to seat you there." Then she looked at me. I could tell she wanted to say something. Probably warning me to treat Kelly well, or something. But she didn't. She just grabbed a menu and started leading us.

"Uh, oh," Kelly said. "Well, I'm not surprised."

"Why uh, oh?" I asked.

"It's a small town. Your car is out front. I'm down two hours later than usual. She knows."

"Well, I'm not going to run back out the door, so you'll just have to introduce me. From what you've said, she seems a wonderful person."

"Oh, she is. She's, well, you'll find out. When it gets too bad, ask for a lawyer."

The waitress, Darla, guided us to a four place table near the windows, where Kelly's grandmother was sitting with her back towards the rest of the room, so she could see out the window.

I could see clear white hair, and tanned skin. Good posture belied her apparent age.

As we arrived, Kelly leaned over, and kissed her. Then Kelly introduced us.

"You seem a nice man, Mike. You may call me Ruth."

"Why, Thank You for the honor, ma'am, Ruth." I took her offered hand and turned it palm down, grasping just her fingers in mine.

"And gallant, too," she said. "Please, be seated, both of you."

I held a chair for Kelly to Ruth's right, then seated myself across from Kelly, at Ruth's left. I did these things Ruth called gallant, because that was the way my parents trained me from the time I first started eating at the family table.

Ruth caught Kelly's eyes with the same searching look as Ron had used. I could see where Ron got it from. She must have been satisfied with what she'd found, because she nodded once, and turned her gaze upon me.

It seemed a much gentler search through my mind, but, for all that, it was much more thorough. I knew without question, I had no secrets left. Ruth knew every single thing in my mind.

"Mike," Ruth said, laying her hand on my arm, "This is going to sound strange, but, I am so sorry for you. And, so happy for you both."

"You are right, Ruth. It does sound strange. I do, though, understand what you mean."

Though Ruth smiled fondly at me, I didn't expect what she said next.

"We are, and can only be the product of our experience. Coming through the fire as you have, made you a better person. It tempered you, if you will. It made you what both you, and Kelly need for you to be, right now. And maybe what Ron needs, too.

"I'm working form a position of advantage, Mike. You see, I knew you the moment I saw you. I know yours and Lisa's parents, intimately. I've seen your baby pictures. I was at your wedding to Lisa, and I have held Danny on my lap, once, when your mom was baby sitting for you.

"I know all about the hell you went through, first with Lisa, then with Danny.