Chapter 9

Carly made her way to Stephen and Paige's house. Rational thinker that she was, she was able to put aside for the moment the thoughts and feelings that had been plaguing her. She actually thought it was a good idea to step-out of what had become lustful mania for a bit and to refocus on something a bit more grounded in reality, like her son's marriage. She would deal with her emotions later. For now Carly would do her best to be a problem solver for her daughter-in-law.

"Hi," Paige said weepily as she opened the door to invite Carly into their home. She seemed to want to say more, but clearly she was holding back tears. As soon as Carly had set foot into the foyer and Paige had shut the door, Paige threw her arms around her mother-in-law and began to cry.

"Oh," Carly said in a genuinely soothing tone. "It's OK Honey." She held Paige and stroked her back, Paige's face tight against her shoulder. Carly sensed something different about Paige. Something about her looked and seemed different but she couldn't place it. They stood there for several minutes until Paige's crying settled. The two pulled apart and Paige beckoned her mother in law into the living room, where they took seats facing one another. "You're not doing so good, huh Paige?"

"Not so good," Paige said shaking her head. "Um, Carly? Wh-What has Stephen been saying to you?" If Carly could do one thing, it was think on her feet. She considered which details she could share without betraying her son, and certainly without revealing the course she and Stephen had been on to this very day.

"Paige, he's really hurting. He feels lonely. He feels very far from you." Paige gave her a painful look. "Paige, I'm not judging you in any way. I don't know anything from your side, and there are two sides to everything. I'm just giving you a basic idea of what Stephen has shared with me."

"I don't know what to do. I don't know how things got this way."

"Stephen said it seems like you're mad at him all the time. Does that ring true at all?"

"Yes, lately. I don't know if I've been more mad at Stephen or myself, though."

"Well, why are mad at Stephen? And, why are you mad at yourself?"

"Oh, it's so complicated, Carly. Things were just so different before we got married. Everything was relaxed and fun. We played around all the time. We were very physical." Paige looked at Carly and reconsidered her words. "Oh, I'm sorry Carly! I'm sure you don't want to hear physical details about your son!" Paige let a small laugh escape her otherwise sad face. Carly laughed inside at the irony of the statement, but simply smiled reassuringly at her daughter-in-law.

"It's OK, Honey. You can tell me whatever you need to. Don't worry about it."

"OK," Paige said. "Thank you." She paused again to collect her thoughts. "I just don't know what happened. We stopped talking. I stopped wanting to come home. Stephen spent more time at the office. I just felt so lonely."

"Well, Paige, that's pretty much what Stephen said to me about how he feels. He feels lonely. He wants to be close to you, but he feels like you're pushing him away. Is there any truth to that?"

"Probably lately. In the last few months, mostly. Something just kind of snapped in me three months ago." Carly recalled that detail from Stephen, that the couple had not had sex in three months. "That's how long since we've been together ... you know?" Carly nodded her head, although Paige didn't really know that Carly already had that specific information.

"Do you fight a lot, Paige? Lots of arguments? Yelling?"

"Sometimes. More often just silence. He doesn't want to talk. He doesn't want to touch me." Carly was amazed at how much the things she was saying were similar to the things Stephen had shared.

"Paige, I can tell you honestly that Stephen feels the same way as you. He said almost the same things to me this week."

"Really?" Paige said, seeming to see a ray of hope. Carly meanwhile, although feeling a sense of relief for her son's marriage, envisioned herself having to find some diversion to deal with what looked like a fleeting evening rendezvous, as well as any future intimate contact with "Eagerson." But again, she put this out of her mind in favor of the marriage.

"Yes, Paige. Really. I think you both need to talk honestly and openly. You have more in common in your feelings than you think."

"Carly? Can I ask you something?"

"Of course, Paige. Anything. Anything at all."

"Is Stephen seeing someone?" Carly froze and stared at Paige, working hard to maintain her calm.

"Um ... why would you ask that, Paige?" Carly was trying to gather more info.

"I don't know. It's just that, well, I've been really cold to him. Like I said, we haven't been together for three months. I sort of wouldn't blame him if he went somewhere else to get it." Carly felt pressure in her chest, but she calmed herself and continued to listen. She thought that Paige had something bigger she was waiting to reveal. "And then, this week..." Carly's chest felt pressure again. "He just seemed, different."

"How do you mean, different, Paige?"

"Just ... I don't know ... more relaxed. Not as angry. Not as angry with me. We still didn't talk much. And of course he was away for a few days. I don't know. I just had the wild idea that he was feeling better because he was seeing someone else." Carly fished in her brain for an appropriate answer.

Stephen hadn't really started seeing someone else. He really just flirted. Well, flirted and masturbated in a private room at the bank, while his mother watched. And he sent her erotic emails. And got a hotel room to be with her. But ... now Carly thought, she would put an end to that. She found she could now answer honestly.

"I'm sure he's not been with anyone," Carly said. "I'm almost positive he'd have told me."

"Yea," Paige said. "I'm sure he would tell you. He tells you everything, doesn't he?" Carly tried to identify Paige's tone.

"What do you mean, Paige?" Carly asked.

"It's just that, he always talks about you. 'My mom this, my mom that ... she closed another deal, bought another building, got her picture on another cover, doesn't she look amazing, she joined another board.'" She paused, seeming like her mind was far away and she was speaking mostly to herself. "Sometimes it seems like he's in love with you." The words hung heavily in the air. Paige then seemed to come back from her mental drift and she realized what she had just said. "Carly, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to say that! I really didn't. I don't know where that came from."

"Paige, Stephen and I are very close. He thinks highly of me and I do of him. But if somehow I'm getting in the way of your relationship, I want to change that. I really do. Your marriage comes first." Carly felt sadness saying this. She knew she was feeling more alive because of Stephen's feelings for her. Hearing Paige say the words that he was in love with her made Carly's heart leap. But she knew she had to put these feelings away and focus on the moment, on Stephen and Paige's relationship.

"No, it's OK. It's not like that. I didn't mean to say it, really." Paige seemed sincere and Carly let it go. "But you're sure he's not seeing someone?"

"Paige Honey, I told you he's not. Why are you so worried about that?" Thinking this reassurance would be good news for her daughter in law, Carly was very surprised when Paige began to cry again. "What is it, Honey? What's the matter?" Paige began shaking her head.

"I've been so mean to him. So cold. I haven't let him touch me. I haven't even let him see me naked for two months. He used to love to see my body and now I don't want him to see it." Carly was about to ask why that was. But suddenly she didn't need to. Carly knew what was happening and why she was sure she recognized something different about Paige when she came in the house.

"Paige," Carly began gently, "have you been seeing someone?" Paige looked at her and buried her face in her hands and began crying hard. "Oh shit," Carly whispered to herself.

"I didn't mean to!" Paige said through her tears. "He was just comforting me ... just talking to me and listening ... just holding me."

"But that didn't last, did it?" Paige shook her head.

"I really wasn't going to. We were just alone and I was really upset. He was so sweet and kind. He held me close. Let me cry and cry. And I just ... I just ... I started kissing him. He didn't even want to. But I kept going and finally he didn't tty to stop me anymore. It just ... happened." Carly knew all too well how that kind of thing could happen. And while she wasn't about to tell Paige that, she gave her an understanding smile.