Chapter 24: Revelations

The next morning, I made a decision that would affect all of our lives. That night, I spoke to the two most important people in my life. After supper, I called Mom and Lisbeth into the den where I'd built a small fire. The leather couches we'd bought surrounded the fireplace on three sides, and I thought the atmosphere would be right for this momentous a discussion. I'd opened a bottle of white wine and offered each of them a glass. Lisbeth's eyebrows went up, but she took the glass.

I dropped the bomb right away. "I've decided to marry Donny."

Lisbeth smiled and said, "He is kinda handsome."

Her blush gave her away and confirmed that she had a crush on him. 'Okay', I thought, 'one down, one to go'.

My mother sipped her wine and said, "Does he know?"

"Not yet, I'm going to tell him Christmas Day. I'll be his present."

Mom laughed out loud. "He'll love that."

"I hope so."

We finished the wine and chatted about household things, and Lisbeth informed us how she was doing in school. She didn't mention Aubrey.

Later that night when Mom and I were cuddled in bed together, Mom asked, "Are you going to share him with anyone?"

I'd thought about it, but no specific person had come to mind until that moment.

"I'd share him with you."

Mom was quiet for a long time, and I thought I might have offended her.

Then she said, "What a novel idea. I haven't had a man in my bed since your father died. Are you sure you won't mind?"

"No," I said. "I don't think he'd mind either, but I don't know how to broach the subject with him. Any suggestions?"

Mom nodded. "Before you get married, sit down with him and tell him the truth about us. Be honest, don't be ashamed and answer any questions he asks. Also talk, really talk, about the kind of marriage you want to have. Who pays the bills, who takes out the garbage and who sleeps with who. He may want to add a man or a woman besides me to your sex life; it's up to you to accept that or not. He may not want to share you with anyone, you don't know, but make it clear before it happens."

Christmas in our new house was perfect. We held a Christmas Eve party for our friends, kind of a replay of the housewarming, and people I hadn't seen in years showed up. Tammy, Barb, Linda, Shelley, Christine and a score of others rehashed all the good times we'd had, and of course they brought up Charli. Evan and Angel were there, and Beej and Lauren dropped by for an hour or so. The emotions ran high, but I got through it with some help from Donny and my mom.

Elmer and Diedre came and dropped off some packages for Lisbeth. I wouldn't let them leave until I'd introduced them to everyone and had them eat.

Christmas morning we opened our packages after breakfast, and I gave the first one to Donny. He had been my rock and salvation all through Charli's death, moving to a new house, and all the ups and downs of life in general. He'd spent the night before in my bed at my invitation, and my mother was hiding a smile.

I handed him an envelope with a card in it, tied with a pink bow. He smiled and opened it, then looked at me with confusion written on his face.

"What's the card say?" I asked.

"'yes' " he said.

"What question did you ask me a while back?"

His face went from puzzlement to hope, and he gave me a half-smile. "You mean it?" he asked quietly.

"Ubetcha!" I grinned, using the current North Dakota slang for an enthusiastic 'yes'.

Smiling and fighting the happy tears, Donny knelt in front of me and said, "Let's make it official." Handing me an opened ring box, he said, "Hannah, will you be my wife?"

I lost it and started bawling with happiness. The ring was magnificent and quite large.

"How much did you pay for this thing?" I asked. "And when did you buy it?"

"None of your business," he replied smugly.

We set the wedding for June 15, 1998, and Mom started making plans. Lisbeth wanted to be a bridesmaid, and I considered having Beej give me away. Lauren could be my matron of honor, and this would give her a chance to dress up and be in public in her new persona.

Donny and I celebrated by making love for three hours.

The four of us celebrated New Year's by staying at home. Donny guaranteed a good relationship with Lisbeth by taking her outside at midnight and letting her set off a few fireworks he'd brought. Mom had cooked most of the day and we ate buffet style. Chicken strips, roast beef, pizza, raw vegetables, chips, dip and several other assorted dishes littered the dining room table, and wine bottles were strewn about the room. My heart swelled with joy; I was with my family!

The first weekend after New Year's, Donny moved in with us. I invited him, and at first he declined, telling me it was improper. Mom and Lisbeth persuaded him to stay; I don't know what they said to him, but he smiled a lot.

The next weekend, I bared my soul.

Mom had helped me make a tray of finger food, and I laid a fire in the den. After opening the wine to let it breathe, I dressed in one of my fancy nightgowns, a gift from Charli. There was nothing under it but me. Mom had told him I wanted to have a serious talk, and had kept him occupied during my preparations. I was freshly bathed and coiffed, I'd had a manicure and a pedicure — from Mom, bless her — and the little makeup I wore was immaculate.

Sensing it was time, I called, "Donny, would you come in here please?"

Donny walked into the den, shaved and combed, looking great. He even smelled good.

He looked around at the food, the wine, and then he let his eyes linger on me.

"Wow," he said. "Sweetheart, you're very beautiful tonight."

I blushed slightly and replied, "You tryin' to sweet talk me, you handsome devil?"

He laughed with me and I motioned for him to sit down. I offered him a glass of wine and pointed at the food; he speared a chunk of apple with a fork and chewed.

A moment later he said, "Your mom says you want to talk about some important stuff. I'm ready when you are."

I'd thought about what I was going to say and I'd even gone as far as writing a few things down, but seeing his trusting face in front of me, I spoke from my heart.

"Donny, Mom said the key to a good marriage is communication. I want to talk about us and the kind of marriage we want. Nothing is off limits, and no holds barred. I'm going to be painfully honest, and I'd like the same from you."

He took my hand and said, "I'd like that."

I took a deep breath and said, "Mom has been a part of my sex life since my dad died. I feel so close to her that if I couldn't be near her I'd lose my mind. She's just as important to me as Charli was. In some ways, she's more so."

He didn't blink or pull away; hell, he didn't move. There was no sneer or expression of disgust or revulsion; he just looked at me.

"Is that all?" he asked.

"No, there's more. I need to know if you want to share us with others. A man, maybe, or another woman. If you need that, I'd be okay with it."

"I've never thought about it," he said. "Would you need anyone besides your mom?"

I smiled and said, "If he's the right one, I'd consider a man. I've never seen two men make love."

He slid closer and hugged me, turning me so I was sitting in his lap. I've felt awkward and clumsy most of my life because I'm tall, but in his arms I felt like a child. He kissed my ear.

"Hani love, I don't want to share you with another man. I don't care much for men anymore, not since I met you."

"Why?" I asked. "You admitted you were bi."

"Yes, I did. But I've been thinking about that, and I've talked to a counselor at work. He suggested I might have behaved in that fashion for the wrong reasons."

I took a swallow of my wine and asked, "Such as?"

Shamefaced, he said, "Wanting people to like me, doing it to alleviate my loneliness, things like that."

I kissed him and lay my head on his shoulder. Very softly, I said, "I love you."

He hugged me and we cuddled for a time, enjoying the closeness, the feeling of oneness.

He ended the silence by asking, "Do you need other women? Besides your mother, I mean?"

I giggled. "I don't need them, but if I'm attracted to someone, I'd let you know and we can decide together whether she's right for both of us. I won't go off and have sex with anyone behind your back."

"You'd want me there with you?"

"And taking part," I said. "I love you, and we could make a sandwich with you."

He laughed. "Some sandwich; stale man on rye, with mayo and pickles."

After I stopped laughing, I said, "Do you like my mom?"

"Sure," he replied. "She's a nice lady and classy as hell. She's very pretty, too."

"She might trip you some day and land on your dick; how would you feel about that?"

"As long as you knew about it and didn't object, I think it would be okay."

"That's what she wanted to hear. She hasn't had a man since my dad died. She needs to have a man like you; gentle, considerate and loving, like my father."

"I'll do my best, but I want you to know my heart is yours. Love is one thing and sex is another; if it ever gets uncomfortable, let me know and we'll stop. If you need private time with her, I understand."

I gave him a few kisses, and each one got a little warmer. I put his hand on my breast and used my tongue a little bit, testing the water.

He reacted like I thought he would, so I rolled on top of him, straddled his hips and whispered in his ear, "Make love to me. Now."

He did, magnificently.

Work continued to be interesting and enjoyable. I caught the girl who was sluffing off and took her to Bobbi. Bobbi fired her on the spot, and a few days later I had a new person to train.