Chapter 8

Karen talked it over with her mother, and they reached a compromise. They decided between them that a wedding between Christmas and New Year's would be the way to go. Since we were living together anyway, that was fine with me.

We didn't have a lot of money, so we didn't plan a honeymoon. Alice and Bob wouldn't hear of that, so they gave us (all three of us) a honeymoon trip to Bermuda.

Although it had taken five months to plan and arrange, we had a small wedding. There weren't more than fifty people there. When I teased Alice about it taking so long to plan a small wedding, she informed me that it took longer to plan a small wedding than a large one.

"Think about it, Jed," Alice said. "If we wanted to hold the guess list to fifty people or less, including the wedding party, we had to be very careful in who we invited. If it had been a big wedding, we could have invited the local dog catcher, and no one would have even noticed."

I guess she had a point. When we were ready to say our vows, Karen and I shocked everyone present. Went it was my turn, I said, "I, John, take thee Karen and Becky to be my lawfully married wives."

I don't think the preacher even realized what I had said. Karen did the same, and I could see Becky, silently mouthing the same words. The preacher pronounced us man and Wife, which we silently translated to WIVES. I even kissed both of my brides. That the preacher noticed. He was standing there, open mouthed, as we walked away.

Bermuda was wonderful. Warm winds and sunny skies were the norm for the entire week we were there. There were miles of beaches, many of them were clothing optional. Of course my exhibitionists opted for no clothing.

There were quite a few college kids in the hotel we were staying at, and on the beaches. As a surprise to Becky, Karen and I had bought her wedding and engagement rings that exactly matched Karen's. Even the wedding rings didn't completely prevent them from being hit on by several of the college age guys.

We went dancing on two different evenings and we dined on five star meals at our hotel and nearby restaurants. We spent a lot of time on the beach, and a lot of time snorkeling. We made a vow that we'd be certified for scuba diving before we came back.

I have no idea how many times we made love that week. When three people are completely in love, and totally uninhibited with each other, you can come up with some very interesting combinations. I think we tried all of the known ones and invented a few more.

We were a weary group as we boarded the plane to take us back to winter.

Ah, winter. Snow and slush. Mrs. Johnson was very pleased when Karen showed her her wedding ring. Our landlady had gotten to know Becky over the last few months as well. At first she had been hesitant about Becky staying with us, but when we explained that Becky was my sister and was escaping the dorm, she relented.

Now, Mrs. Johnson looked at Becky's finger and asked, "So, did you get married, too, Becky?"

Becky laughed and said, "No. It's these damned college boys, Mrs. Johnson. They've been driving me crazy, hitting on me. We got to thinking that if they thought I was married, they'd leave me alone."

"But, child, I'd think you'd like to be dating at least some of them."

"I want to be a biologist. I'm facing at least six or seven more years of school before I can even think about getting started in research. I just don't have time for dating."

Hey, it sounded like a good excuse to us.

Karen and I were juniors and Becky was a sophomore, when we had our first problems with other people at Ohio State. Becky was now living with us full-time. It was a two-bedroom apartment we were in at the time, but since all three of us slept together, we had made one bedroom into an office.

We had made several sets of friends over the last couple of years. Most of them were couples. Midterm exams were just completed, and we wanted to celebrate. We invited two couples to our apartment for snacks and drinks. Sally and Jordan Phillips were a very driven couple. They were both business majors, and their goal was to be millionaires by the time they were thirty.

Tina Williams was a classmate of Karen's. Her boyfriend, Bob Thompson, was a math major. Neither were as I driven as the Phillips, and both of them were a lot of fun to be around.

We got a call from Sally Phillips just a couple of hours before they were due to arrive. She said that her cousin, Buffi Farnsworth, had come to visit, unexpectedly. She said they could either bring Buffi with them, or they would need to stay at home. Karen told them to bring her along.

I knew immediately I wasn't going to like Buffi. Becky and I were raised on a farm. Karen is one of the most down to earth people I have ever met. Those are the kinds of people we normally gravitate to. Buffi wasn't like that. Buffi was, or thought she was, high society.

She acted as if she smelled something rotten, when she looked around the apartment. We tried to make her feel welcome, but it didn't do much good. She didn't talk much, as if our conversation was too unimportant for her to notice. Sally seemed a little embarrassed by this, but maybe a little embarrassed by us as well.

When Buffi made a comment about anything at all, it was biting. I thought on a few occasions I was going to have to pull Becky off of her. Although, after she had been there for an hour or so, I was almost ready to grab her by the hair and throw her out of the apartment myself.

Jordan, Bob, and I were discussing Ohio State's chances in the upcoming Rose Bowl, when Buffi announced loudly that she needed to go to the bathroom. Karen told her it was down at the end of the hall, on the right.

Buffi came back in a few minutes later, and asked, "I only see one bedroom here. You people said that the three of you live here together. Just how do you arrange your sleeping?"

I must admit, my heart sank when she asked that question. Becky acted as if it didn't affect her in the least. She looked Buffi in the eye and in her best Southern Bell voiced said, "Why I do declare, I don't think that is any of your business."

Buffi I started to make some retort, but Sally broke in and said they had to go. The evening was still young, but I have to admit I was glad they were leaving. Bob and Tina decided to make it an early evening as well.

"So, did we screw up or what?" I asked after everyone had left.

"I guess in a way we did," Karen said. "I don't think any of us thought about someone going through our house and discovering we only had one bedroom."

"We've been lucky so far and everyone else who has been here had a little more class than Buffi. I think she's probably the first one who didn't have enough class to refrain from opening doors," Becky said. "I'd like to pull her hair out."

"Well, maybe it's time we started coming out in the open a little more. We're all of age now, so at least we don't have to worry about that. If we don't admit that Becky is part of our marriage, there's not much of a way they could prove it. As for sleeping arrangements, the couch makes out into a bed, so we just say that Becky sleeps on the couch."

"If we say that Becky sleeps on the couch, how is that coming out into the open?" Karen asked.

"I think maybe it's time we start talking to people about one of the issues we want to change. Pick one. Maybe nudity to start?"

"I've been having some thoughts on that," Becky said. "I've been doing a little research on it in my spare time. It seems to me that most of the laws prohibiting nudity do so because the legislators feel that seeing someone nude is bad for you. Of course the three of us think that is a crock."

"Doesn't it say in the Bible that nudity is a sin?" Karen asked.

"No way. When Adam and Eve where in the Garden of Eden, they were naked, and it was good. Got didn't see anything wrong with them being naked. It was only after they sinned that they realized they were naked. They tried to hide from God by covering their nakedness with fig leaves. It was their decision, not God's, that they should be covered."

"It seems to me, if I remember correctly, that even Jesus went naked at times. Doesn't it say he was naked for a while at the Last Supper?" I mused.

"I do believe I remember the same thing," Becky agreed. "Also, when he left the tomb, he left his garments behind."

"I think the most interesting thing I came up with was the fact that it is not illegal to be naked on federal land. Our Constitution doesn't forbid nudity, nor does it guarantee it as a right. Therefore, it is up to state and local governments to make and enforce laws against nudity. I think California is probably the most liberal state in that respect," Karen said.

"So how do we go about starting a campaign to make public nudity legal?" Becky asked.

"There are thousands of resources for us," I said. "There are pamphlets and brochures about the advantages of nudity. Maybe we should start with making up our own pamphlet that we could distribute on campus. College students are probably the most open-minded people we could target. The only problem is, college students tend to think of nudity as something risque. We want them to think of it as something natural."