Chapter 16

"Dan! What a pleasant surprise. Come in," said Marsha opening the door and showing him into the small living room. "Let me get you some coffee. How about some pumpkin cake."

"Thanks, but no. I just came by to share some news. I talked with Chris right after school and asked him not to mention anything until I could talk with you."

"Oh? What news?"

"I'm moving. I've been offered a position with a small college in Nebraska. They had a sudden vacancy and I've accepted. I start next term which is coming up right away. I'll be leaving Tuesday."

Marsha felt as if she had been hit in the chest by a boulder. "Nebraska? But that's halfway across the country!"

"I know. I wish it weren't so far, but -- to tell you the truth I've been thinking about making a move for some time. I've waited because of Chris but now that he's fifteen and seems to be doing so well I thought this would be the time."

"But, we need you."

"Thanks for saying that, but Chris is developing into a fine young man and you and Randy..."

"Things are the same with Randy and me. I had hoped all these years that having Chris would make a big difference. It seems to have made little if any difference at all."

"Still you remain married."

"I know it doesn't seem to make any sense. It's just that I -- well I've always been so opposed to divorce and..."

"Understandable and admirable. But things do seem to have stabilized with the two of you and I feel I need to make a fresh start, just as you did."

Marsha winced to think how her new start had failed to make any real difference and then Trent's taking her by force only a week and a half ago. Inside she was miserable. A husband who was largely indifferent toward her, a rapist for a son-in-law and now the one man she had always adored and felt she could count on was walking out of her life. She suddenly realized how she and Chris had dominated his life and perhaps how badly Dan needed to get away and finally establish a real life of his own. So she decided not to share her misfortunes, but rather to support this wonderful man who needed to hear from her that his going would be all right.

"Of course, you're right, Dan. All these years you've given Chris and me far more than we ever had a right to expect. You've been wonderful. I'm happy that you can now find a life for yourself."

"It isn't that I haven't enjoyed the last fifteen years..."

"I know, but you've been a great godfather and an even greater friend. You're right. Things may not be perfect with Randy and me but we're getting along and Chris is developing into a fine young man."

"Yes, he is. I'm proud of him and proud of you for raising him the way you have."

"I've had a lot of help from a very good friend. Chris and I will be fine. You know I wish you only the best of luck."

"Thanks, Marsha," he said, getting up to leave. Now that the news was broken he didn't want to prolong the goodbye.

"You will keep in touch?"

"Of course. I'll write and call, and there's always e-mail."

"You take care," she said hugging him tightly, "good godfathers are hard to come by."

He smiled sadly.

"And I expect you and Chris to let me know how you're doing."

"Deal," she replied, smiling to cover the tears.

He reached over and kissed her on the forehead.

"Bye, Marsha."

"Dan..." He had turned to leave but turned back when she called his name. For one fraction of a second she came close to breaking down, telling him everything including the fact that she had been secretly in love with him all these years, of asking, pleading with him to stay, to becoming her lover, perhaps eventually even her husband. But she considered it all a pipe dream. She was committed to a marriage and a family. She could not simply walk out, no matter how unhappy, how unfulfilled she might feel. "Uh, if you need any help with packing, Chris and I could..."

His face was also filled with disappointment. "Thanks, but the movers are going to take care of all that."

"Oh," she said and they shared a moment of deep sadness.

"Then this is really good-bye?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Dan, I can never express..."

He shushed her with a finger to his lips.

"You've meant every bit as much to me as I have to you. Let's leave it at that."

And with that he turned and walked silently away.

Even after sobering up, Trent was still enraged at Marsha for not responding to him then telling him to get out and not come back. He would show her. Maybe he'd wait and go back when he had another opportunity. No, there was no telling how long that might be and if she simply went limp again she might even be able to claim that she had won -- rebuffing him even if he raped her.

No, it would need to be something much more sinister. Now let's see. He had predicted she would screw around on Randy. Yeah, but how? And who? He thought about getting several friends of his to drop by and gang bang her, but that wouldn't be her choice. No, it had to be Marsha voluntarily getting it on with someone. Trent thought through several possibilities as he sat drinking coffee at a local diner.

Suddenly, it hit him. Yeah, perfect! he thought. It would take some time and work but ... definitely worth a try. He smiled to think of the end result.

"Hi, you Chris?" said Trent leaning out the car window as the fifteen year old walked down the front steps of the school and started down the sidewalk. Trent asked it as a question but he had done his homework and had acquired photos as well as other useful information about the boy.

"Yeah, I'm Chris. Do I know you?"

"Not really. I'm your half brother Trent."

"Yeah, I recognize you now. I've seen your picture in Dad's photo album."

"I just thought it was about time we got to know each other. Hop in, I'll give you a ride."

"Well, uh, okay," said the boy opening the car door and sitting beside the man, fifteen years his senior. "But why now? I'm fifteen."

"Yeah, I know. I should have come around before but I've lived and worked away from here, besides I've always felt guilty about your mom."

"Guilty? What do you mean?"

"Well, let's see, how do I put this? Let me ask you a question. How are things between your dad and your mom?"

"Well, okay I guess. At least that's what Mom says."

"So you've asked her how things are? Doesn't that mean you've noticed things aren't quite right?"

"Well now that you mention it."

"I can tell you that things haven't been right between the two of them for a long time. Your mom was -- is -- a lonely woman. Our dad is okay as dad's go, but he doesn't give her what she needs."

"You mean attention and all that."

"That too, but what I'm talking about is the kind of attention only a man can give a woman."

"You ... you mean... ?"

Trent nodded with a sad smile on his face he hoped was convincing.

"See, I stayed with them a short while before you were born. I became aware of how lonely she was real quick. That's when I noticed her trying to let me know what she wanted."

Chris' eyes bugged out.

"She what?"

"Oh, there were just small things at first. You know, a smile when Dad wasn't looking, paying me lots of compliments..."

"But Mom pays me lots of compliments. My ball playing, my grades..."

"Ya see? She's beginning to let you know the same way she let me know."

"But..." Chris was confused.

"Hey, it's normal for women who aren't getting the attention they deserve to look elsewhere. It's not that Dad's a bad guy or anything, but he just can't give her what she needs."

"But you said you felt guilty. About what?"

"Well, like I say, while I was there she started sending me signals. It started as little things and then they got more serious. I was just a kid at the time, like you are now and I didn't realize until later how much I could have helped her, been there for her, given her what she needed," he lied.

"But that's the thing, I don't know what she needs and she just keeps telling me everything's okay, even when I know it isn't."

"Mom's are subtle about these things. Sometimes you have to take charge -- like I should have."

"What do you mean?"

"Pay her some compliments. Tell her how great she looks. Let her know that at least you notice how good looking she is."

"Mom is beautiful."

"I know. You need to remind her of that."

"But shouldn't Dad... ?"

"Of course he SHOULD, but he doesn't. He takes her for granted and pretty soon she starts thinking she isn't"

"You're saying I should tell her she's sexy?"

"Sure. She needs you, Chris. Needs what she isn't getting from Dad."