Chapter 5

Katherine woke up shivering, her head still pounding as she opened her eyes to darkness. At first, she thought she was dreaming, but the pain in her head soon ruled that out. Thoughts of blindness were quickly dashed when she saw light coming through the bottom of a door no more than a few feet away.

"Where am I?" She whispered in the space, surprised to hear her voice close around her.

Sitting up gently, she slowly reached her arms around, touching the walls on all sides. The room wasn't that big, just a few feet across on all sides, but it wasn't the smallness of the space that disturbed her, it was the darkness. Crawling across the floor, she ran her hands over the door, noting that it was smooth with no knob to open it. Giving it a hard push, Katherine let out a sob of panic when she realized it was locked.

"Let me out!" She cried, pounding her fists against the door. "Somebody please!"

Silence met her, but she screamed anyway, begging someone to let her out. It was too much like the Ocean Blue, too much like the little room she had been kept in for months. For a moment, she believed that Philip had found the other ship while she was asleep and handed her over.

The new thought caused her to stop her struggles, too afraid of drawing attention from Bega. She couldn't go through that treatment again, it was just too horrible, even four years after the fact. The waking in the middle of the night, the marathon of questions that would end in a slap or some form of abuse if she didn't answer fast enough.

It was always over the same thing too, something that Katherine had no clue how to answer. Her father had a treasure buried somewhere on a coastline, worth more and more each time the legend was told, but no one knew the exact location. To her, it was pure legend, things that her father had told her as a bedtime story, but to Bega, it meant a king's ransom and the only person that could tell him where to find it was kept locked in her little room.

Katherine remembered making things up, telling Bega that he would find what he was looking for on a certain piece of land or island. After months of fruitless searching, the threats against her became more serious. She still remembered the first time that he told her if she lead them to another dead end that he would give her over to the crew for their pleasure, and the horrible day that he finally went through with his threats.

Katherine let out a whimpering sob as she heard someone walking around on the other side of the door, their boots clicking off the wooden deck. She scuttled backwards into a corner, hugging her legs tight against her chest in fear that they would come to the door.

The person had stopped and was muttering something. Their voice was deep, but that's all Katherine could make out through the thick door. Her heart froze when the footsteps started again, heading straight for her little prison. She slowly let out her breath, whimpering as she curled up into a ball as the door rattled slightly, a key scraping as it slid into the lock. Katherine clamped her hands over her ears, squeezing her eyes tight as she started to sing an old sea shanty to herself.

Philip opened the door to the little storage room in this cabin, half expecting to get the full brunt of Katherine's anger, just as Anne had given him a few moments before. The blonde headed aristocrat had berated him and cursed as he stood laughing in the doorway. It wasn't until she took a swing at him that things turned serious. He took it upon himself to strip and bound the haughty princess and give her a place of honor on the main deck. Of course, no one in the crew was to touch her, but it was more than enough humiliation to keep her in check.

He was surprised when the light from the cabin shown on the woman in the corner. He stood in shock, watching as she rocked back and forth, singing a song as she tried to block everything out.

"Katherine?" He asked, fearing that he had driven her mad.

Katherine just shook her head, sobbing harder as she shut herself off more from the world around her. Philip stepped forward quickly, kneeling down beside her. He reached out and cupped her face in his hands.

"Beauty." He whispered, grabbing for her wrists as she lashed out, giving a cry of pure fear. "What's wrong, Katherine? I'm here. It's okay." He soothed.

Her hands were shaking uncontrollably as she gasped for air, her panic making Philip feel uneasy. He couldn't understand why she acted this. He reached out and took her face in his hands again, leaning in to give her a gentle kiss on the forehead.

"Please, don't give me to Bega. Please, don't make me go back." Katherine sobbed as she leaned forward, resting her head against Philip's chest.

"Tell me why, beauty." Philip whispered, running his hands up and down her back as he tried to ease her fears. "Tell me why you can't go back. Tell me why you have to hide who you are. Tell me everything."

"I can't." Katherine whimpered, pulling back to stare at Philip, her tears slowly coming to a stop.

"When will you stop playing these games, Katherine." Philip murmured as he stood up and walked out of the little room.

Katherine stood on shaky legs, reaching out a hand to steady herself with the wall as she slowly peeked her head out of the closet and looked around the small cabin. It had a large oak desk that backed up to a bank of windows. The ocean outside was calm and blue, disappearing into the sky as it met the horizon. A bed, almost like a bunk was on one wall, two chairs sitting against a wall along with three chests that were stacked to the ceiling. A door with a porthole by it was on the wall just to the left of the closet, the sound of the men on deck muffled by the thick wood. Katherine could barely hear Anne, screaming on deck as men jeered at her.

"What games?" She finally asked as Philip took a seat at his desk, unrolling maps and papers over its surface.

"You want me to spare you from going back to the Ocean Blue, but you won't give me a reason. You're messing with me, Katherine, playing a game and I don't like it. Just tell me why you don't want to go back and maybe I'll consider it."

"You're a fool, you know?" She stated, pulling a chair over to his desk and sitting across from him. "You know the legend. You know my story and yet you act as if you don't know my reasons."

Philip just laughed to himself and shook his head, looking over a map. "For all I know, Katherine, you were Bega's whore and you ran away because he treated you bad." Looking up, his green eyes locked on hers, a faint smile curling his lips. "Am I right? Did he fall in love with someone else, and suddenly Ocean Blue herself wasn't good enough?"

Katherine sat in stunned silence, her cheeks blushing at the mere suggestion that she and Bega had ever been anything more than occupants of the same boat. He had never touched her in any sexual way, she knew this to be fact. In truth, he was never taken by the redheaded beauty, but by a golden haired cabin boy, something that he fought hard to keep from his crew and the rest of the world.

"If only you knew." She whispered, shaking her head slightly as he stopped and looked up from the map to stare at her.

"He offered quite a reward for you. Some say that he was inconsolable with anger." Philip stated, reaching down deep to find the poetic language that was so teasing. "Now, that tells me that you are something much more than what you claim to be, beauty. Couldn't get your jollies with him, so you jumped ship. Made it to dry land and into the open arms of Lord Mickelson. Did you bugger him too?"

Katherine's face was a blank sheet, not betraying any of the emotions that were seething below her skin. "I am a respectable lady, Philip." She stated evenly, her voice tight with anger.

"Oh, really?" Philip asked amused as he started writing in his ledger. "Is that why you didn't hesitate to seduce me last night? Oh, beauty, if that's what you want in your life, believe me, the Ocean Blue will cater to all of your needs. I know for a fact that Bega has a pension for giving difficult ladies to his crew. Get all the loving you need from those men." He was outright laughing now, deep within his chest that brought a red hue to his cheeks.

"How dare you treat me like this!" Katherine shrieked at him, standing up out of her chair as she pounded her fists down on the top of the desk, making the maps jump slightly. "Like ... like some common whore! My father was a respectable man, my mother was a high classed lady. I may be a peasant but I'm not a whore." She growled, her eyes burning bright with anger.

Her eyes were dark with anger, her jaw clenched so tightly that Philip swore she would break her teeth. It was the look of a woman who wanted to kill someone, and he knew that that someone was him. He stopped his writing long enough to look up at her, his eyes as calm as the sea on a windless day.

"Beauty, calm down." He stated, keeping his cool as he sat there staring at her. "Your life on the Ocean Blue couldn't have been that bad."

"You have no idea what my life was like." She stated, her chest rising and falling quickly in a gasping breath as she fought to control her anger.

"I have no idea because you won't tell me!" Philip shot back, a laugh carried on his voice as he tipped back slightly in his chair, one leg lazily stretched out as it pressed against his desk. He laced his fingers together, placing his hands behind his head as he balanced the chair on two legs.

Katherine crossed her arms with a huff and turned her head to break his gaze. On the wall just beside the desk was a map of England, something so familiar to Katherine that it made her heart ache to think about it. It was then that she thought of a plan, her blue eyes widening slightly, a smile curling the edge of her lips. She turned her attentions back to Philip, all anger gone from her face. The look startled him, and he raised an eyebrow in curiosity.

"What if I can't tell you?" She asked, her voice even and emotionless.

"Why wouldn't you be able to tell me?"

Katherine grinned and laughed, a chuckle that was light and airy. She bent down, bracing her hands against the desk as she leaned across the papers, her face inches from his. "What if I'm not Katherine Moore?"

Philip snorted as he tried to stifle a laugh, the smile falling from Katherine's face as her eyes silently begged him to believe her. "You have no clue that your face betrays you, beauty. You could never tell a lie." He watched as her shoulders slumped and that tension returned to her jaw. "Besides, if you aren't Katherine Moore, then you are of no worth to me. I will drag you out on deck and shove you overboard without any thought. Believe me, Kit." He stated, emphasizing the name as his green eyes took on a harsh look. He let the chair fall back into place, a sharp snap resonating through the cabin as he leaned across the desk, his hands folded neatly in front of him. "The only thing that you have going for you at the moment is that you are, and always have been, Katherine Moore."

"You are a slimy bastard." Katherine whispered, pushing off the desk with a shake of her head. "You'd throw me overboard. Well, that's perfect, Mr. Montard. Throw the woman that you love to the waves. It would make a fantastic legend, I should know." She taunted.

"I never said that I loved you." Philip stated evenly as he shook his head slightly.

Katherine froze in place, her eyes wide with silent rage. Her lower lip quivered with emotion as she took a deep breath, unable to speak because she didn't trust her voice to be strong. The seconds seemed to tick by slowly, the only sound in the cabin was the sounds of the waves gently lapping at the side of the ship, the occasional call from outside.

"Then what about last night?" She whispered as she raised her gaze to stare at him. "You said it last night."

Philip could see the tears beginning to well in those crystal blue eyes. You're growing soft. He thought to himself as he felt a lump of sadness form in his throat. He cleared his throat and took a deep breath, preparing himself to lie to the woman in front of him, something that would probably break her heart into a million pieces that even he couldn't put back together again.

"When will you learn, Kit, that men do this for sport all the time. You're nothing but a conquest to me. Another notch in my belt. You're a smart lass. You could have figured it out in a heartbeat if you'd wanted. And I never said that I loved you."

Katherine felt like she had been slapped, her head swimming as she watched him calmly tell her that, his face showing no emotions to tell her it was untrue. She blinked her eyes quickly, trying to suppress the tears that threatened to flow at any moment. "You lied about everything?" She asked, surprised by how strong her voice sounded. "About this?" Katherine fished out the necklace from her dress, holding it out as if the sight of it would bring Philip to his senses.

"I didn't lie about that. It is my mothers, but about everything else..."

"How can you expect me to believe you?" Katherine cut him off suddenly, her voice shrill in anger.

"How can I believe you?" Philip shouted, finally having enough of this game of cat and mouse. "You lied to me, Katherine! You lied about who you were. You hid that from everyone. That's not what honest people do!" He growled, standing up out of his chair so quickly that it tipped over, hitting the floor hard with a crack as he gripped the edge of his desk tight to keep from slapping her.

"How dare you tell me what honest people do!" Katherine screamed.

Before she thought about it, she grabbed the necklace tight in her hand and jerked. Katherine yelped as the chain finally broke and she flung the jewelry at Philip as hard as she could. Philip barely had time to react as the pendent hit him in the face, landing in his open palm as it fell towards the desk. He stared at the broken links dangling from his hand, a mixture of sadness and rage flowing through his veins.

Doing a quick spin, Katherine flung her loose hair over her shoulder, a shower of curls greeting Philip as he looked up at her, the necklace gripped tightly in his hand. With purpose, Katherine strode forward, intent on leaving the dreadful cabin and finding a way off this ship. She pulled the ring on the door, opening it slightly with a squeal of wood. Suddenly, the door slammed shut as the ring was ripped from her hand.

Turning her head slightly to the side, she saw Philip's arm braced against the door, his white tunic brushing against her cheek. She could feel the solid wall of his body just behind her, the sound of his breathing loud in her ears. Everything was silent, her heart pounding loudly in her ears as she waited for him to speak.

"Don't leave the cabin." He stated, resisting the urge to hold her tight as he watched her thin shoulders shake with unshed tears. "I know you hate me, but I do this for your own good."

Gently, he turned her to the side, pressing her back against the door as he stared into her eyes. Two pools of blue that were rimmed with a crystal lining of tears stared back at him, her lower lip quivering with emotion. He reached up and caressed her check gently with the back of his hand, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead as he swallowed a tight knot that had formed in his throat.

"I mean nothing to you?" She asked, her voice sticky with unshed tears and wavering as her nose twitched with sniffles.

Philip sighed and turned his eyes from hers, staring down at the handle of the door. His mind warred with itself, torn between love and adoration for the woman in front of him and anger at himself for falling for another human being. Gritting his teeth, Philip reminded himself of the bounty that awaited him as he turned his gaze back to Katherine.

"I'm sorry." He whispered as he slowly shook his head, forcing himself to clench his hand tight in a fist to hide its shaking.

With a sniffle, Katherine shoved him to the side and silently made her way to the bank of windows just opposite the door. She stood there in silence, staring out at the blue waves as tears started to flow down her cheeks. Philip watched her for a few moments before turning and ripping the door open. The squeal of wood announcing the arrival of the captain to the deck before his angry voice started shouting out commands. Another sharp squeal and the door slammed shut, leaving her alone with her thoughts.

The thud of the door as it closed made Katherine jump and the dam holding back her tears burst. She made her way over to the small bunk and collapsed on the sheets in a fit of tears. She jerked her head up from the cool linen suddenly, running her hands lightly over the covers as she caught his scent.

Looking around the cabin, she spotted a little nook made by the end of the bunk and the wall. Crawling over, Katherine settled back into it, not wanting to be reminded in anyway of Philip. Leaning her head back against the corner, she wrapped her arms tight around her chest, fighting a chill that coursed up her spine. Folding her long legs against the other wall, she was virtually invisible to the cabin.

"Papa." Katherine whispered, her tears falling silently on her skirt, making dark spots on the fabric. "If you can hear me, please don't let me go back. Two lives were more than enough for mine and I don't want anyone else to die at Bega's hand. I'm not worth it."

She sobbed again, her heart aching more than she could have ever thought. She would never love again, she thought bitterly, leaning her head back against the corner of the small space, watching the clear blue sky over head as the ship slowly drifted off in an unknown direction. Soon, she had cried herself out, her eyes and head aching as she hiccupped and slowly drifted off to sleep.

Philip stood glowering behind his first mate, watching as the crew scrambled to avoid his anger. The necklace was tight in his hand as he clasped them behind his back, thinking about everything Katherine had said. There was no way that he was a liar, he couldn't be. He had never truly told her anything that would have led her to think that he loved her, nor did he ever actually tell her of his plans to kill the other crew. She was just over acting and emotional, he tried to convince himself.

"You work theem any harder, and you'll be facing a mutiny." Came Albert's voice through his fog.

Snapping his attention to his friend, he still harbored hard feelings against the Frenchman because of what he had done, and he certainly wasn't in the mood to deal with him.

"They shouldn't have let everything go to hell then." Philip muttered as the first mate set his course and stepped away from the wheel to avoid the fight that was about to erupt.

"Eet would be a lot better if you vould admit that you love her." Albert spat out at his friend, watching as the red cloud of anger settled over his face.

"I can't admit something that's not there."

"Bullshit." Albert said with a laugh, as Philip reached out and grabbed him roughly by the front of his shirt, pulling him close to his face. "I told you not to fall een love, Philippe. I told you not to fall een love with zee duchess, but you deed. Look how eet turned out. Now look at Katherine and tell me you feel nothing. Whether you want to admit eet or not, you deed fall in love. Eef you are going to break her heart, at least tell her zee truth."

Philip stared at the man in front of him for a moment, his green eyes smoldering before he finally let him go with a sigh. He looked down at the necklace still in his hand, the sight almost mocking him. It almost seemed to scream about his broken love and heart, reiterating everything that Albert had just said. He held out his hand, shoving the necklace into Albert's grasp.

"Fix it." Was all he said as he turned around to look out over the ocean from the bow of his ship.

"I can feex zhis, but only you can feex her heart." Albert whispered once more and was gone by the time Philip turned back around.

For a fat fellow, Philip thought, the man is surprisingly quiet. Of course, he had been in the wrong, but it wasn't something that he wanted to willingly admit to himself. After all, this was his ship and he was captain. His word was law and as long as everybody believed that, there would be no troubles. He would tell her the truth in time, but at the moment, all he cared about was finding the Ocean Blue and seeing if Bega's offer still held true.

It was growing late in the afternoon when Philip finally drug himself back to the cabin, his anger having been taken out on the crew. He was tired, beaten and wanted nothing more than to sleep in his own bed. Opening the door, Philip expected to see Katherine sitting there, still seething in anger, or at least all of his possessions to be destroyed in her fury. Everything sat as he had left it; nothing moved and nothing broken.

At first glance, the cabin seemed empty. It made his heart stop as he thought she had escaped or thrown herself overboard. As he began to tear apart the cabin, searching in every space, he continued to think the worst. Certainly she wouldn't be that foolish.

It wasn't until he saw a small piece of blue fabric peeking out from beside his bunk, that his heart finally calmed. Silently, he made his way over to the side of the bunk, a smile crossing his face as he saw Katherine tucked into the narrow space.

Her head was resting against the corner, her arms wrapped around her legs as she hugged them close to her chest. She was sound asleep, making no noise as she breathed in and out. With a sigh, Philip bent down and gently picked her up off the floor, cradling her in his arms as he moved slowly to the bed, trying not to wake her.

He stretched her out on the bed, watching as she snuggled into the sheets, never waking as he sat down next to her, running a hand through her loose curls.

"I'm sorry, beauty." Philip whispered, bending down to place a kiss on her exposed neck.

He sat there like that for a moment, just taking in everything about her. Her pulse just below his lips, the scent of the sea that seemed to come off her skin, the warmth of her flushed skin as she slept. His hand slowly reached for her breast, cupping it in his hand and marveling in the feeling of the flesh just below the fabric. He gave another sigh, his breath tickling her neck as he placed another kiss against her jaw, slowly kissing his way until he reached her temple.

It was there that he stopped, pulling away quickly as she groaned and turned on her side, unconsciously denying him. She would be angry and heartbroken, he knew, but there had to be something that would make her trust in him again. It was more than desire that he felt, although he didn't want to admit it. He felt alive, passion, and to a lesser extend, love. All of those things that he hadn't experienced since time with the duchess.

It was then that Philip remembered the chest that he had kept from one of the many ships his crew had plundered. It had belonged the wealthy duchess that he had a fling with, only to be rejected when her husband finally came to claim her while they were docked just off the coast of France. He had loved her, bedded her and professed that he would dispatch her husband and marry her himself. She always use to laugh at that promise as he made love to her on that very bed, but she had been leading him on the entire time. He cursed the woman after that; cursed her soft body and voluptuous form, cursed her head full of silken curls, and cursed his heart for giving itself over to a woman who could never love a simple pirate like him.

The duchess had left behind the chest, claiming that she could always buy more finery. She left him with a smile and a kiss from those blood red lips, promising one day, just maybe, she would be back. It wasn't meant to be and he found himself drinking away his sorrows in a seedy bar and soothing his aching heart with whore after whore. Philip had made a lot of money off the duchess' ransom, but it quickly ran out, the whole reason behind the hunt for the Ocean Blue while robbing small ships in an attempt to gain more wealth.

He stood up from the bed, careful not to disturb Katherine as she slept. Walking quickly to his desk, he drug the small chest out, expertly opening the lock and throwing open the lid. Inside lay a red dress, the silk shining slightly in the bright light that was coursing through the bank of windows. It looked to be about the right size, and Philip smiled as he remembered how Katherine had looked in red.

Taking it out of the chest, he gave it a shake and then draped it over his chair. Turning back, he looked over Katherine with a close eye, noting the worn condition of her shoes. They simply wouldn't do, so he gently removed them from her feet and pulled out the fine slippers from the chest, laying them out along with the dress. Silk stockings, made from more expensive material than even Philip owned, with garters of the same red color of the dress completed the outfit.

Stepping back from the chair, he looked over the outfit again with a smile. He could only imagine what it would be like to take her in that dress, the feel of the stockings as he made love to her on the bed. Just like the duchess, he remembered sadly as he gently ran his hand over the satin. "Maybe I'll love her just as much in time." He murmured to himself.

There's that word again! His mind shouted to him. You are not in love.

With groan, he turned and threw a blanket over Katherine's sleeping form, placing another kiss on her temple. At least this time she didn't pull away, he thought bitterly, as he gently tucked her in.

"Soon, beauty, you shall be more to me than any woman ever has been." He whispered, half believing that he was referring to the gold that she would bring. "Even if I don't love you, I'll still care for you." He finally admitted to the quiet room.

One more look at the red dress and Philip left the cabin, searching for Albert as he ordered a special dinner to be cooked for the himself and the lady in his quarters.

The smell of food and someone moving around brought Katherine out of her slumber. The cabin was warm as she slowly surfaced from her sleep, the feel of a blanket tucked around her made her smile at a distant memory, long since locked away in her mind. She slowly opened her eyes, yawning and turning on her side to see Albert hurrying around the cabin.

"Good evening, le petite." Albert said, smiling at her as he lit the lanterns around the room as the sun slowly set on the ocean, brightening the cabin with an orange glow.

"Le petite? Je suis le meme age que vous." Katherine said softly, gaining a booming laugh from Albert as he looked at her in surprise.

"Vous parlez fancais?" He asked, a huge smile crossing his face

"A little." She whispered softly, sitting up in the bed and rubbing the sleep from her eyes, still looking at him with a sense of wariness.

She looked so innocent sitting there rubbing at her eyes, her skin still flushed with sleep and her hair tousled into a million red curls, that it made Albert's heart sink with the thought of what he had done. With a sheepish look, he set the wick he was using down on the desk and walked over towards her, lifting her chin to look into her eyes.

"I am truly sorry." He whispered, his eyes saddened as he looked at the bruise on her cheek.

"Don't think anything of it." She said, looking at him with complete trust in her eyes, something that confused Albert. "It's not the first time I've ever taken a hit and I'm sure it won't be my last." She said softly as he released her chin.

"Never from me. You can count on that." He said with a smile as he quickly moved from the bed back over to the table, looking around everything once more with a critical eye.

Katherine stood up and stretched, slowly making her way over to the bank of windows and took a moment to take in the beauty of the sunset on the ocean. The water sparkled with a million fragments of orange light and the beams that streamed through the window quickly warmed her skin. A smile curled the corners of her mouth as she closed her eyes and silently took in the warmth.

"Everything seems to be in order. Except you, of course." Albert said from behind her.

She turned at that, looking at him in confusion. "Except for me? What do you mean by that?" She asked as he made his way over towards Philip's desk chair and held up the gown of red silk.

Katherine's eyes widened as her jaw dropped. She had never seen something so beautiful in her life and it made her wonder where he had acquired such a precious gown.

"I'll help you to dress." Albert said with a smile as he draped the gown over the back of the chair again, standing in the middle of the room with his hands planted firmly on his hips as he watched her intently. "Well?" He asked as she stood still, not moving an inch.

Katherine was taken back by his request, unsure of what he wanted at first exactly. It was then that reality hit her hard and she found herself laughing nervously, an embarrassing trait of hers that always came out when she was put in an awkward situation. She reached up and placed a hand against her throat, her eyes wide in surprise.