Chapter 5: Hot Magenta and Canary Yellow

Leia and Jessica Christensen had been friends for years. After Leia's ability started kicking in, she was never quite sure if people really liked her or if maybe she was influencing them somehow. In retrospect, she could see where she might have changed the way people looked at her, but Jessica had been her friend before all that. She knew she had never influenced her, even accidentally, because she had liked Jess just the way that she was and wouldn't change a thing.

Leia had felt nearly her whole life that she didn't fit in. Too white for some people, too black for others, and no matter how much her parents loved her (and each other) they couldn't protect her from the people around her. Leia knew growing up that she was lucky to live in the era that she did, but it was small consolation when she was the only girl not invited to a birthday party or to go skating on Friday nights.

Jessica had never seemed to look at the color of her skin, at least not as a bad thing. Growing up, they had played with make-up and done each other's hair. Leia would tell Jessica she wished that she had her long blonde hair and Jessica would say that she thought Leia's skin was so pretty and smooth. They had been like sisters. She was always invited to Jessica's parties.

When Leia had hit puberty, she'd realized that boys were not as disgusting as they'd used to be, and she had found herself noticing them more. Unfortunately she had also found herself noticing girls. She'd felt more isolated than ever, and it made her angry. Her ethnicity was different from everyone's at her school, she could do things with her thoughts that nobody else could do, and now girls aroused her. Sometimes it had seemed like the deck was stacked against her.

She had been terrified when she'd faced the fact that she was in love with Jessica. Whenever she pictured the perfect girl, it was her friend that she imagined. But she had been afraid to think about Jess in that way; after the thing with Brian it had almost escalated to a phobia, but she could not imagine ever really hurting her friend.

Unfortunately, that's exactly what she'd ended up doing.

A few days before the end of summer vacation, Jessica invited her over to hang out by the pool, and (although Leia didn't need further incentive) she mentioned that her parents were gone for the weekend, and that meant that the bar was officially open. Jess laughed and added that maybe they could skinny-dip, too. Leia knew she was kidding but loved the image that sprang to mind.

When Leia got there, Jess was wearing a pink thong bikini and it was nearly impossible not to gape. Of course, Leia looked whenever she knew Jess would not notice. She felt herself becoming aroused and tried to fight back the images that started to pop into her mind.

She went to change into her yellow bikini. When she emerged from the bathroom, her friend let out a wolf whistle. Leia blushed and Jess laughed. "You look soooo sexy, Lee," she said in a joking tone, then added, "I would love to have a tiny waist and big hooters like you!"

The girls headed outside, and the afternoon was spent getting pleasantly drunk, swimming, and hanging out poolside. As the sun was setting, Leia looked over and noticed that Jess had fallen asleep. The song on the radio played quietly, We were born before the wind, also younger than the sun ere the bonnie boat was won as we sailed into the mystic, and the sun on Jessie's skin made her look lit from within. It reminded her of how she'd felt that night.

She found herself touching Jessica's face with her fingertips, finally tracing the outline of her lips and imagining what she would taste like. Jess was the only person that had ever understood her and accepted her, and she wanted to kiss her just the one time. She knew it might be a mistake, but she wanted Jess to be the first girl that she ever kissed — even if her friend would never know it.

She leaned over and lightly pressed her lips to the blonde girl moaning slightly at the taste of her friend. She tasted of Pina Coladas and a unique flavor all her own. Leia could not help but deepen the kiss, pressing the tip of her tongue into the opening between Jessica's lips, wanting that moment to last forever and knowing it would have to last a lifetime. She would never have the courage, or the chance, to have that moment again.

Just as she was about to pull back she felt her friend wake up and struggle. She pushed Leia aside and sat up, pulling towel to herself. Her eyes were huge. "My God, Lee, what were you doing?"