Chapter 12

Real relaxation time, the kind where you kick back and get lost to the world, would not be on Jared Winslow's docket for this summer. It was the challenge that brought him to this stop of life and he more than measured up to meeting it. He knew other coaches and teams would do whatever they could to stand in his way. He had done his due diligence on the talent recruited by Sherm Woodard and maintained a promise to not touch any Vermont Valley Tech recruits he had lined up. However, a bulging notebook filled with newspaper clippings, notes from friends and allies of both he and his father, and letters from fans in general, gave him a road map for the summer that could bring him from coast to coast to talk to potential recruits. Being able to fill the place kicker and punter roles would be a summers worth of work and to have done it from within the student body made him glow. He also felt that he had, at worst, a back-up quarterback in Marvin Hudson.

At the second mini-camp Hudson came with a renewed interest in the position after going through the motions to appease his new coach at the first camp. He liked the thought of being a leader on the field. He was intrigued by the simple drills that Coach ran him through and asked him to practice before coming to the second camp.

Marv spent his spare time in the next few days back peddling with his arms raised as if signaling a touch down. He would back peddle 10 yards and then push off with his left foot to change forward to his beginning mark and then do the same and push off with his right foot. He found the more he did it, the faster he could do it and with great ease of balance. Coach had told him that when he got to the point where it seemed easy, start doing it with your arms akimbo (hands on hips). By the time he got to the second camp he was so curious by the drills he was excited to see how they might benefit him, only because he found how proficient he had got. He found with smaller choppier steps his balance and speed improved. He almost wondered if these were pass coverage drills. But when he got to the camp Coach threw him a ball and said "Let's have a catch.".

They threw the ball back and forth to each other for almost 10 minutes before Coach Winslow told him they would start throwing harder. Marv Hudson had no problem handling the coaches throws, even it they were hard and crisp. He only worried that Coach could handle his hardest at the 10 yards they apart.

But then Coach did something different from the stride and throw he had been doing. He dropped back in short choppy steps and then sprung forward wheel-housing the ball to Marv. The result was Hudson ducking away and flailing with his arms to catch the ball at his face. He went and retrieved the ball coming back smiling at the coach. When he got to the 10 yard mark he repeated what the coach had done, dropping back and pushing off his back foot as he reversed his momentum. The result was wide of the coach, but Winslow was able to reach and get a hand on the bullet pass.

"I get it, I get it!" He shouted to Winslow.

"Do you feel the power generation?" Jared said smiling.

"Yes, yes. Ohmigod!" He answered.

"Now, we have to harness it all and translate it to the position. Keep in mind that it isn't how hard you throw, it's how hard you throw accurately. Of the same mind, it's not how far you throw, but how far you throw accurately. This little exercise wasn't a parlor trick, it's simple physics. To spring something forward, it must go back first. To throw a ball underhand to me you would swing back first, the principle is just that simple. To drop straight back with the short choppy steps rather than turn your shoulders to your throwing side and side step back you're keeping all of your options open without having to do a hard pivot. If you see a hole in the line you can draw instantly instead of setting. But running the ball isn't your worry now. I want to teach you how to throw. Marvin, if I didn't recognize that you were a good athlete I wouldn't even try this out. But I can see by your play in the defensive backfield that you were probably a good soccer player, an excellent tennis player, and I bet you played the infield in baseball."

Hudson blushed and nodded his head. "I was the top seed in New England High Schools for tennis all through my junior and senior years. I couldn't participate in the Class A finals for academic reasons, but I've overcome those problems. I was in too many sports and my school suffered."

"Your athleticism should translate well to this position if you learn the basics of throwing and identifying defenses. You're an intelligent defender but now you'll have to think even faster on your feet. When you use the short choppy drop your feet are always in motion and that is much harder to read. You can roll left or right with an easy pivot, but your weapon is your arm and your feet and legs are the trigger. You call a 52 Hot Pass setting a wide out and the tight end as targets. As soon as one of them opens in your sight line, you plant and fire. But, because you have 2 receivers on the right side and your line is blocking in a fence, you know the defense is going to weigh heavy to that side and if the line has done its job your back may have gotten himself free. You pump, drop one more step and throw for a longer gain. Is it a broken play? No, not really because you save your trigger. Without having to reach back, which takes extra time, you can throw a 30 yard play instead of the 10 yard play you planned ... all because of the physics of it. You are power and speed in motion. You use that along with a well coordinated throw to speed your release and put that much more on the ball. The faster you get into your pocket and the faster you release the ball, the more you confound defenses. Am I making any sense to you?" Coach asked as Marvin nodded.

"I see the logistics of it all from a defenders point of view. If the quarterback keeps his shoulders level with the yard lines defenders never know which side he's seeing. If he never gets flat footed he's tough to wait on without losing your man or letting the zone wash out. Do any pro sets use this style?" Hudson wondered.

"Not usually, because once a QB gets to start at the pro level he's lost that extra quickness, but he still has his arm and knows how to keep his momentum trigger. A couple of pro's kept the style in their early careers, Spurrier, Namath, a few others. It's all about speed. Getting set quick, releasing the ball quick. What does that do to a defender?"

"You make him keep his options open, he can't commit as fast as he wants." Marv answered.

"And if he does guess and commit, what happens?" Coach asked quickly to get a quick response.

"If he's wrong the receiver either opens up alone in the zone or the quarterback runs for open field." Hudson fired back.

"That's because you were a good defender. Now I'm not telling you that you're going to be a quarterback for us, but I think you have all the tools and I've shown you a few of the things you can use to hone a skill. Keep practicing your throwing, always off your back foot, even if you just drop a step. Build up the memory in that muscle set. I'll look you up a few times in the summer and we'll have a catch. Get a friend or family member to catch you often. If you want to use a softball, that's OK. It keeps your hand open to build up the strength. With your hand closed around a baseball you don't stress the muscles and tendons as much where the ulna and radius bones meet the wrist." Coach told him as he pointed to his own arm and wrist. "That's where the snap of your wrist will come from and power the ball, like we just saw."

"Coach, I know you're telling me that if I work hard enough I can make this all happen, but if I can't start I... " He began to say and stalled not wanting to poke holes in the coaches plans.

"Don't worry Marvin, your job in the defensive backfield is safe. I wouldn't pull you from there to have you sit on the bench as my back-up quarterback. My back up will not sit because I need the roster spot. When you come to camp in the fall we'll evaluate everything. Just understand that learning the offensive and defensive sets will be a challenge and school will get no easier. Once I've shown you what you can do the decision will be yours when you come to camp." Winslow told him with serious conviction.

"Who do you think will be the starter at quarterback?" Hudson asked.

"I don't know, the boy Coach Woodard recruited seems to be better suited as a wide out. We will keep all options open." Jared said with a smile and a pat on the back to Marvin Hudson.

Coach Winslow knew in his heart that Marvin Hudson could start at quarterback some day for him. He just wasn't sold that he could learn enough about the offense and trust his capabilities to do it that fall. His defensive play, as a freshman, had gone un-noticed because of the low stature of the school. If he were with a Big 10 school a lot of hype would have been thrown his way. He had been shy about the fact that Coach thought he could do something he had never tried. He just didn't have the self-esteem to think of himself as the leader on the field, the quarterback. That was for the "cool guys and jocks" in High School. Now he was excited to think of himself in that role, his confidence growing already. Jared Winslow had lit a confident, competitive fire within him, and that was good.

Before setting out to see each player at their home with one of his assistants to personally follow up on their previous one on one's and mini-camp sessions Jared promised himself a couple weeks to get his life in order. He wanted to resolve Barbara Gaynes once and for all. He wanted so much to miss her and want her back in his life, but that fire had gone out. He felt sure of it now, although he didn't discount the fact that once he saw her in person it could change. The only urgency he felt at this point was the fact that she may have been holding great expectations of their reunion and leading her on was something he couldn't do. She was the favorite pair of jeans he couldn't just throw away. He would rather give them to the Salvation Army and hope they might get a good home rather than discard them. The memories flickered bright, but the flame was cold now. He regretted having to call her to let her know he would be in town.

The phone rang 4 times before the message played. He was discouraged to hear his own voice.

"Hello, You've reached the home of Coach Winslow and Barbara Gaynes. We can't come to the phone right now but sure don't want to miss your call. Leave your name and number and we'll get back to you as soon as we can. Beep."

He rolled his eyes and left a message.

"Hi Barb. I'm going to be in town for a couple days and I want to get together and talk. So, call me on my cell or car phone and let me know when you'll be around. I'm driving to my Mom and Dad's in a bit and then I'll pop down to see you on..."

"Hi Jared, I'm here. I was watching a movie and couldn't find the remote. I can drive up to your Dad's and meet you if you want. I have a few days to burn before we start summer sessions. It'll be fun." Barbara said as if nothing had happened between them.

"No, ... no Barb. You stay there." He said coldly, although he hoped it didn't sound that way. "I'll be in town on Wednesday and call you before I come by. Are you busy early or late that day?" He said hoping to give her a little preview of the tenor of his visit.

"I'll be here all day. You're going to stay here, right? I'll change the bed that morning and plan a special dinner for you." She said hopefully.

"No, don't go to any trouble for me Barb. I've got a room at The Radisson, I've got to see some of my football people and... " He began.

"Jared, this is your house, OUR house. Why wouldn't you stay here?" She interrupted.

"Barbara, it's YOUR house, and I'm not staying there because I don't live there anymore." He said emphatically.

"So you're coming to dump me in person?" She said, her voice cracking.

"No, I'm coming to talk to you and hope to get some things straightened out and better understood. Please, let's just talk when I get there. OK?" He implored.

Barbara sighed deeply and agreed and seemed uninterested at whatever else Jared had to say before she hung up.

Jared was glad the few days leading up to his confrontation with Barbie was a full slate to keep his mind off the situation. His first stop after the drive was at his parents house where he relived his childhood every time he went. Home was home and his Dad could not have been more proud. His Dad had failed a bit since retirement but he relived his coaching fire through his son. He couldn't wait to sit and read the notes and charts Jared had on his new team and truth be told, Jared wanted to hear his Dads input. His Mom doted on him and was disappointed Jared had opted to stay in a hotel, but he did plan to entertain some friends and disturbing his parents was not something he would do. His first and second days of the visit were great catching up vehicles, but the end of that second day was his late afternoon with Barbara and he became a man facing the firing squad as the day passed. He weighed the possible magic of seeing her and having his heart flutter with seeing her and finding the reaffirming feeling that his heart was no longer into the relationship. The latter scenario was not one she would weather well and the memory of the joy she once brought him made it seem so unfair that he had to hurt her. Only the truth his heart told him that she brought the separation about herself made it easier for him.

When he pulled into the drive he saw her home almost unchanged from when he left. She kept the yard and lawn as neat and orderly as always and he knew he saw her back away from the rear door where she had been watching for him. He took a deep breath and walked up the walk and looked through the rear door to the kitchen through the four paned window and saw her sitting at the table balancing her checkbook, or at least looking that way. He knocked gently and she looked up feigning surprise saying "Come in" loud enough for him to hear as she stood. When he came through the door she glided to his side and hugged him tenderly as he said his hellos.

She pulled back from her hug expecting him to kiss her but he loosed his grip and dropped his arms.

"Barbie, I know you expect us to pick up from where we were a while back, but I don't think I can do that." Jared said.

"I know it will take a while, but we'll get married someday, just like you promised!" Barbie said brightly with a big smile a hugging her head to his breast.

"Barbie, you're hearing what you want to hear. Would you want me to marry you even though I didn't love you that way anymore. Would you want me to be miserable and to make you miserable?" Jared asked pointedly.

"Are you telling me you don't love me anymore?" She asked pulling her head away and staring right into his eyes.

"Yes, I'm telling you that I love you as a person who is close to me, but not as the person I want to marry and make love to and have children with. Something happened to us. As we grew into our lives we went into different directions. Can't you see that?" He asked.

"No, I'm still your Barbie and you're my Jar-Jar. Look at our pictures together on the mantle, that's us, that's us in love." She defended.

"That was us at that moment Barb. We've drifted apart and you're making me say this as bluntly as possible. I don't want to live with you anymore now or ever. I've tried to miss you and my heart just isn't into it. These things happen Barbie. We grew apart and you won't admit it. Aside from the day I told you I was leaving we hadn't made love in weeks, ... months! If the paper hadn't leaked my leaving we wouldn't have made love that day. If you desired me it wouldn't have been that way. You want me to stay for your convenience, I don't think you love me like you think you do." Jared reasoned to Barbie as her eyes welled with tears.