Chapter 4

'Whaddya mean, leave?' I was outraged. 'We're halfway through the dam' year, Rosie. How the hell you expect me to find someone for just four months? What the hell's come over ya? Suddenly don't like it here?' I ran out of words and looked at her closely. Nice girl, or used to be, anyway. She was sitting quietly on the couch, looking calm.

'It's fine here, Doug, but God has called me and I must answer. I came to tell you that, and to say that I'll pray for you.' Shit, what can you say?

'Rosie, whyntcha have a coke or somethin', tell me what God said, stuff like that. Shit, girl, we known each other a while.' I talked some about Christian duty and she finally spilled.

Turned out she'd had the call, been thinking for a while, decided to answer it, spent months planning it carefully, was going to leave next day, go to Africa, join some mission, everything settled already, no arguments please. Hadn't told her parents, so as not to upset them. Hadn't told me either. No worldly possessions, nosirree, no problem with me keeping the security deposit, she knew it was an inconvenience but God's word was final, and did I know anyone who needed a car? I kinda tuned out. Hell, she was twenty-four, nice family, half-way through a doctorate, so why not just take off and live in a cesspit somewhere? Not my problem. Her car was another matter though. I knew someone who needed one of those suckers bad. I talked to her for a while, pointed out God moves in a mysterious way, stuff like that. Didn't say the person would be grateful as hell to anyone fixed up wheels for her. Didn't say I'd been thinking some about how to get her one. Didn't say this smelled like my dam' ability doing its usual ass-backward trick.

When she was gone I fetched a beer, thought kinda despondently about how life kicks people around: Rosie's parents, didn't know their daughter was going to disappear out of their lives, Rosie, blind to everything except God's word. Me, stuck with an empty room, no chance of renting it less I got real lucky. The poor bastards Rosie was going to be looking after, I guess. Better not to forget them. Hell, they probably needed someone like her to work their corner. God's pretty smart, getting good people to do his chores.

Couple more beers later I felt just as bad. I stood up, stared out of my bay window. Spring had snuck up while I wasn't looking: people in lighter clothes, brighter colors. Someone, somewhere was playing Frisbee. Day like this in my junior year was what it reminded me of. The day I finally realized what I was.

After that first night with Judy, the rest of my sophomore year was a fucking dream. Lot of guys had been watching her, taken their best shots and walked away with their ears smarting, so the first time she appeared for breakfast with me, looking like a tired and happy woman, you could almost smell the disappointment. They were pissed that I'd nailed the ice-queen, proved them all wrong, so I got the usual comments, had to deal firmly with a couple of persistent badmouths, but when she heard about that her reaction was real positive. Ice-queen, my ass.

Hell, I'd never been part of a proper couple before. I kinda forgot that I'd set the whole thing up, spent all that time pumping iron, studying just as if I cared, hating every minute, working on the fantasies, keeping my hands off my cock: I guess my brain just papered over the memory, wanted to believe she'd fallen for me all by herself. Beautiful feeling. And she was a conscientious girl too: grades first, then Doug. Meant I could take enough time out to keep it fresh, return the favors with enthusiasm.

I'd been kinda nervous about telling Annie, but she was way cool. Guess if you're a hippy and into free love and stuff, plus you got a steady guy as well as a college toyboy, you need to be tolerant. I spent a while telling her how nice it'd be to keep spending time with her, and I guess that tipped the odds a bit. She promised not to mark me up anymore, agreed not to come round to my place, said she'd be ready and waiting and would I please do that thing with my tongue before I left. Skinny little hippies sure have their good points. No problems anywhere: I thought I'd cracked it, was gonna be able to do it all my way. Didn't realize that my talent had a mind of its goddam own.

Like I said, catbird seat: from her birthday through to summer we cruised. I cut down some on the gym time, figured I was getting regular exercise anyway. Kept up the studying though: between Gary and her, I didn't have much choice. Kept up the imagining, visions of her and me trying new stuff together dancing through my head. When I checked the graph the lines were hanging in fine, running about eighty percent of the Patty Edwards high spot. Eighty percent and holding steady is better than a hundred percent once in a while, right? Happiest I ever been, I guess, looking back from here. I hadn't been honest with myself, that's why. Remember that: pure honesty is a killer. People can't handle it, and if they can't, neither will you.

I stayed at the apartment over the break. Mom and Dad were going through a bad spell and a small-town summer watching fights plain didn't appeal. I took a job stacking shelves, nights, Gary kept paying his share of the rent. I had a few nice times with Annie, smoked a little grass, managed an hour a day in the gym, hating every fucking minute, missed Judy some as well. She worked the whole break, interning in some child psychology department at a hospital on the coast. First week back we were at my apartment, kinda enjoying being together. At least, I was.

'What's going to happen, Doug?' she asked. She was propped up on one elbow, her head over my crotch, taking an occasional hesitant mouthful of cock. She'd raised one leg for me and I was doing much the same, teasing her a little, enjoying the build-up, the contrast of pale skin and dark pink pussy and trimmed auburn fur. Some of the rest of her was a different pink, little blotches where she'd peeled some. Redheads don't tan real well. She looked like she was color-coded.

'Right now? Gonna roll you over, practice makin' love the minute you say "Go". After that, depends. Then we can go get something to eat, then I gotta hit the library or you'll beat up on me.' Her lips slid down my shaft then up again.

'I guess I didn't mean right this minute. I'm a senior now, Doug. This year's going to be awful full.'

'And I'm a junior and I just changed my major. Gonna be pretty busy too. Hell, we can swing it. I'll be here for you, you'll be here for me, library's there for both of us.' She nodded absently, then took hold of my cock and ran her tongue teasingly over the head, peering up at me.

'You really like licking me, don't you?'

'You sure do jump around some. Lemme see, the answer is "sho' nuff". All the major food groups, great taste, great texture, great reactions, no calories. Perfect first course. You want me to show ya how much I like it?' No reply. Oh-oh. I reached round and hauled her up, settled her in the crook of my arm, hoping for a click. Nothing.

'There's somethin' more here, kid. Tell me what's buggin' ya.' She wasn't going to be coaxed.

'And you like it when I suck it, don't you? Why do you like it so much? '

'Jeez, Judy, what kinda question is that? Because it's fuckin' wonderful, is why. You want me to be serious, it's like a sign of trust, I guess, knowin'you ain't gonna bite down hard, stuff like that.' She thought about that.

'It's never felt like that to me. I mean I can do it now, and I know you love it, but I hate the taste, and the feel in my mouth, and my jaw hurts afterwards. It sorta feels like a chore.' She wasn't looking at me and her body had kinda tensed up. Still no click. Where's the dam' script when you need it?

'Shit, Judy, so don't do it. It ain't a dam' trade-off. You shoulda said. No problem if I keep right on with the food groups though, huh?' She shook herself and her old self smiled through.

'Whenever I want, Silvertongue, but right now I want it where I like it.' She rolled and straddled me, pinning my hands with hers, pale breasts swaying as she leaned over. 'Make it stand right up.' I flexed my cock, forcing it clear of my belly, and she shuffled backwards and managed to get it set right, then sank onto it. Looked pretty pleased with herself.

'See, mister, no hands.' No mouth either, I thought. Bummer.

'Good trick. Ya were readin' a book as well, that'd be prime time.' She bent forward and bit my nose softly, growling a little.

'No more talking.' Her hips began to tilt and I took her face in my hands, kissed her some while we warmed up. Soon we were moving together, feeling each other's needs as the pressure grew, and it was almost as good as before.

She'd rung a couple of bells though. When she'd left, cussing about the time, taking the car so she wasn't late for something, I went and turned on the PC. I'd bought it over the summer and transferred three years worth of ability data from my ratty old graphs onto a fancy spreadsheet program. I'd paid way too much for that sucker, didn't know why, but it looked kinda interesting. Business applications, but flexible, for cashflow, earnings predictions, floating variables, stuff like that. I'd spent some time figuring it out, then fiddled with it some till I found a way to factor all my stuff in.

That evening I ran it backward and forward, did my best to tighten up the parameters, thought about comments Patty had made, and Julie Anderson; Judy too.

'You know, there's a part of me that's been wanting this since last year. You caught me once, sneaking peeks in the library. Then when you fell down those steps, it was so weird. I mean, such a weird way to meet. You ever think that?' She'd said that the night of her birthday, first time we'd fucked, and the next morning she'd come back to it. 'Something kinda clicked when I saw you. Not straight away, more like gradually. Strange feeling, made me start noticing you more. If you'd hit on me, I don't think I'd have brushed you right off.'

I thought back to what I'd been doing and thinking back then, best I could, changed the weighting some, ran the program again, didn't like what I saw. I shut the machine off and went to find something to eat.

One of the things you have to understand about slackers is we don't think much beyond tomorrow. Worry is stress and stress is for other people. We kinda have enough self-esteem not to sweat it too much, believe we'll deal with problems when they arrive, manage OK somehow, stuff like that. Shit, it's in the Bible even: 'sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof'. Says it right there. So I let it alone, carried on the way I'd been: little gym time, some study time too, time thinking about Judy and how she looked when she was coming hard under me, how she tasted and smelled and felt. Funny thing, since I'd changed my major to History the studying came easier, caught my attention some. Twice I even broke a date with Judy so I could finish stuff up, maybe improve my grade. I knew it surprised her, but I got a reluctant nod of acceptance when I explained. Hell, she did it too, time to time. She didn't talk about BJ's again, and I didn't push. Annie went down on me like a fucking steamhammer every time I saw her, so I could handle it. Like I said, hippies have their talents.

Thanksgiving, Christmas, coming up to Spring break. You have to understand, nothing was bad, exactly. Hell, not like the year before, but the first six months of a relationship are always better, right? You're discovering new stuff, hot for a new body, new games, new everything. Even the new faults are adorable. How cute that she reminds me every day my hair needs cutting, till I go get it done in self-defense. How nice that she tells me everything twice, assumes I can't find my own butt without both hands and a map. How sweet she was upset that I went out with the guys for a few beers that time. It's a sign that she cares, right?

Hell, Judy wasn't like that, but you know what I mean. Stuff starts to grate after a while, no matter how good everything is. Often, the smaller the problem, the bigger it feels.

I guess we were jogging along. Everything was fine. Both busy, both still hot for each other, both unwilling to look around. Course, I was seeing Annie, but that was different. Didn't want to break her heart, and she and I, we laughed at stuff Judy didn't think was real funny. She was kinda quiet and thoughtful once in a while, but hell, senior year, she had a right. What I didn't realize was the important stuff. Important for her, I mean.

Saturday before Easter break I was out enjoying some early sun, playing Frisbee with some people, not thinking about much. When I heard a car horn, realized it was mine, I jogged over to her.

'Hi, kid. Come to collect me?' She smiled the way she did when she was being bad.

'Collect you, inspect you, strip you down and service you. You want to finish your game?' I was climbing into the car.

'What game?' She snorted and we took off.

In the apartment she was feverish. Pushed me onto the bed, stood over me looking down, eyes bright.

'We are going to screw this afternoon, and when we've done that we're going to screw again till we're too fuckin' tired to do anything else. You good with that?' She was stripping off her clothes as she spoke, and I hurried to catch up. I had my pants and shorts off, and was ripping at my shirt buttons when she landed on me. I ended up flat on my back again, her sitting astride me, outlined against the sunlight coming through the window. I squinted up at her, had the sense to keep my mouth shut. She never said "screw", and I remembered she only cussed when she was upset.

Upset maybe, but she was pumped, glowing with everything that was her. She knew I was staring, and she straightened up, put her hands behind her head, pushed her chest forward.

'You like what you see, Doug?' Her voice was soft and caressing, full of love, just a hint of something else hiding behind the soft purr. I wished I'd been putting in more gym time, having better fantasies, whatever. Not a click to be heard. Seemed like I was on my own.

'Ever since I saw ya the first time, Judy.' She smiled.

'Love that line. Me too, Doug. I love what I see.' She stayed there for a moment, like a carved statue. Her posture pulled her breasts up real high: the slight crease underneath them gone, just the soft swell of flesh, pale and freckled, familiar. Breasts I'd kissed a thousand times: nipples hard and pointy, the way they were when she was ready to go, small pink areolas pulled taut, pebbled and wrinkled, screaming to be soothed. Her breath was rapid and shallow, her stomach muscles tight, fluttering just enough so I knew she was full of something I didn't understand. She lifted herself onto her knees and pushed her pelvis forward.

'You like this, too?' Her knees were gripping my torso, the strong tendons in her thighs standing out clearly. Where her body forked I could see her pussy lips, full and plump, glistening with need. I wasn't entirely sure what she needed though. She lowered her hands and pulled herself wide open, thrusting herself forward even more. 'And this? You love this, don't you, Doug? Fucking it and eating it and making it feel so good.' Her voice was still a caressing murmur. I kissed the tip of my finger and laid it gently on the top of her slit. Still had the good sense not to say anything: this was her, and I'd do better listening than joining in. She shivered as I touched her, then swiveled so that her ass was facing me. When she spoke again her voice was different, still soft, but with an edge to it.

'This is for you, Doug, because I love you, and you better fuckin' not butt in.' I felt her take a deep breath, then her head dropped slowly and her lips closed round my slack cock, sucking me deep into her mouth.

Kinda took me by surprise, I guess, and it wasn't till her hand slipped between my legs, cupping my balls gently and stroking them, that I began to get hard. The big vein along the bottom of my shaft started pulsing and her top lip pressed down on it and her soft fingers rubbed it further down, behind my balls, right where the seam melts into the ass. My cock twitched and she began to work it with all of her, her head rising and falling, her hands fluttering over my balls and round my thighs and ass, her own ass sliding along my chest, out of reach. A hard, urgent aroma was coming from her, and her pussy lips were darker than I'd ever seen them.

I tried to reach out for her, but her hand left my balls and whipped round, slapped mine away. The rhythm of her movements accelerated, head bobbing fast, her tongue whipping round me, insistent pressure from her fingers. Her determination, all of her focused, pushed me right along and I was as hard as I'd ever been, straining upwards, trying not to fuck her mouth, spoil whatever she trying to prove. The warm slithery warning flooded through my groin and down to my balls.

'Uh, Judy... ' She took no notice, upped the tempo again, and my seed burst through my doubts, spurting into her warm mouth. She kept her lips closed tight, breathing hard through her nose, and when I'd finished she let my cock slip through them and straightened up, turned round again. When she was good and sure I was paying attention she opened her mouth and showed me my cum, white and thick, dribbling a little over her lips, then closed her mouth again and swallowed convulsively, her throat working as she forced it down, almost gagging but not quite. I saw her tongue running round inside, collecting saliva, and she kinda swished it round and swallowed again.

'That's how much I fucking love you, Doug.' Then the tears started trickling down her cheeks and I reached up and pulled her down and held her close against me, stroking her back slowly and feeling sorta helpless, not knowing what words would help her.

After a little while she quietened and we lay some more, not saying a word, then she twisted out of my arms and went to the bathroom. I heard her brushing her teeth and gargling for what seemed to be the longest time, then she came back and smiled brilliantly.

'Time for your food groups, I guess.' She climbed onto the bed and straddled me again, then kneewalked up my body till her pussy was over my mouth. She leaned forward and braced her arms against the wall above the bed, then let her body sink towards me.

'Go'. I went, wanting real bad to make it special for her. She was more than wet. Hell, her pussy felt like it had been dipped in a bucket, her taste stronger than usual. Funny, but I remember I noticed a visible pulse in the big vein in her thigh before my vision contracted and I dragged my tongue the length of her, the way I always did before the show. She grunted and settled herself, moving herself a little and her clit pushed against my nose straight away. Normally she wanted a little teasing while she warmed up, but not right now. I curled my tongue up and round, caught her low-slung G spot and began to work both sensitive areas the way she liked, trying for smooth, not wanting to force anything.

No chance. She took hold of the reins straight away, driving herself onto me, moving fast, pushing herself like a madwoman. Within minutes she was gasping, her thighs clamped round my head, the trembling of her orgasm beginning, then she cried out real loud and froze for a second before I felt her pussy contracting spasmodically round my face. Apart from that first sound she was silent while it flooded through her, and when she'd stopped and her body relaxed. I still didn't know what to do. Like always, her taste, experiencing her reactions, had got me hard again. She moved off my mouth and glanced over her shoulder, then rolled over and lay on her back, legs open wide, one hand rubbing her clit gently. Her belly was still fluttering.

'Now, Doug, and as hard as you fucking like.' Her other hand snaked out and grabbed me, pulling me towards her. Her breath was still fast, her breasts rising and falling, and I tried to kiss them, trying for calm, but she grabbed my hair and forced my head up.