Chapter 3: Margot Alone

Initially I'd shut myself in my room with the hours passing timorously.

When I did emerge to face up to Guy, I found just his note.

It told me he had flown off to his pal Ralph at the Manor: to think things through. The message relaxed me. It showed Guy felt shaky too.

Oddly, the following day I felt that somehow Guy's actions had ended a long period of emotional isolation for me. Suddenly I felt more alive; at the centre of something. I needed to see Guy: to start afresh together. Without him I was simply alone.

Then out of the blue an unexpected letter arrived. It was from Iris Carlton- Hawes of the Carlton Estate. Its content was exciting yet it raised ambiguous questions for me also.

6^th April 1942

I regard Guy as a wonderful chap and so enjoy his company here at Carlton Manor. In fact Guy has asked me if he could work here on the Estate?

Iris and I were reclining in sun chairs, secluded by shrubs and flowers.

Here on the Carlton Estate it all felt

far from the madness of war.

After my reunion with Guy the lads had gone off to play cricket.

It was an opportunity to chat quietly about Guy's expectations.

Iris was attractively sophisticated and I felt naturally at ease with her.

Even on the awkward topic of coping with an amorous son her cultured tone drained the topic of any shame.

"It's about maintaining your respect and their obedience Margot," Iris was saying calmly, "And you will surely lose that if he thinks he's in love with you Margot?"

Iris clearly realised I was in an affair with Guy and responding to her logic, I said sheepishly, "Oh ... I see."

And then needing Iris to understand, I confessed weakly, "I had wondered why he'd been so difficult with me lately Iris. I just seemed to loose all control."

Iris smiled caringly, "They get the bit between their teeth and you can't pull them up. I know and that's not what you need, is it Margot?" she said softly.

Iris was offering me to unburden my sin with her.

"Oh Iris ... he's become so sturdy ... I tried to stop him... " my voice faltered as relief enveloped me.

Iris put a comforting hand on mine and with wry understanding said, "Don't worry Margot, Ralph flustered me the same." She gave a sly grin. "But now I know how to handle him. It works out fine ... you'll see."

After a quiet moment or two, Iris was brightly recalling a conversation she'd had with a friend in London on the topic pubescent boys.

"Apparently, with the absence of fathers at war, incest at home has really grown in England." I blinked at this blithe reference but was agog while she paused to sip her drink.