Chapter 5

Elizabeth sat on the bed, wondering what just happened. Here she was, giving herself to Chase, her virginity, something she had held onto for so long, and he rejected her. It was bad enough to leave her alone on the bed in the nude, but he then fled the hotel suite. Tears welled up in her eyes and she slowly rose from the bed and gathered her clothes.

This was why she closed herself off to men and why she had barely dated in college. She couldn't deal with the rejection when a guy found out that she wasn't going to allow herself to be used as his fucktoy. And, here she was, finally opening up to Chase and entrusting him with her heart, and he tossed her aside.

She went into her room and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror-nude with mascara running down her cheeks. She began the shower, cleansing herself of his touch and smell. She scrubbed her skin to the point that it appeared red in an attempt to wash him away. The tears began to flow more freely as the reality of what had just happened began to sink in further. She leaned against the wall and cried herself out.

When there were no tears left to squeeze out and the water began to cool, she exited the shower and toweled off. She threw on jeans and a t-shirt and began heaving her clothes into her suitcase. When she had all of her belongings packed, she called for a car and took one more glance around the hotel suite. Well, it was nice while it lasted, she thought. The doorbell of the penthouse rang and the bellhop took her bag to the elevator for her. She closed the door and headed home.

Elizabeth stared out the window as the car drove into the country. Her expression was tired and blank. Her hurt would soon dissipate and turn into anger, but she knew that this could not happen soon enough. As soon as she got back to the castle, she would send Chase's belongings to London, so that she never had to see him again.

Chase didn't know where he was going when he left the hotel suite, but he knew he needed to get air. He wanted her so badly, but was not going to have her first time be a drunken romp in the sheets. He left the hotel and went across the street to Hyde Park, walking the paths illuminated by the moonlight. He needed to get his bearings. He knew he should have explained things to her before he just ran out of the hotel room, but knew that she would probably try to convince him to keep going, to take her virginity. Knowing that she was a virgin, that he would be the first to fill her, made him want her all the more.

He left the park and went back to the hotel bar. He knew he needed to go back up to the suite, but was stalling. He knew he handled things poorly and would need to again make amends. He ordered a beer and sat at the bar, frustrated. Why was he doing everything wrong with Elizabeth? He never had problems when it came to wooing women, why were they starting now?

A petite, pretty blonde came over and sat on a stool near him. She smiled at him and gave him a wink, but he strangely was not interested. He wanted to be upstairs with Elizabeth, he needed to explain things to her, and he left the bar without finishing his beer.

The penthouse was dark and quiet. He first went to his room, but she was not there. He then went to her bedroom, and saw that the dresser drawers were left open and empty. She was gone.

Four days later:

Chase stayed in London. Elizabeth had his bags dropped off at the hotel that afternoon, making it obvious that his presence was not welcome at the castle. He had tried calling her several times, but Gerard kept telling him that she was unavailable. So, he spent his days and many evenings in the studio, trying to finish the album.

But when he was alone, Elizabeth haunted his thoughts and dreams. He was miserable without her. He snapped at the guys in the studio several times. He was drinking a lot and basically feeling sorry for himself. Several women had made passes at him, but he showed no interest. He only wanted to be with Elizabeth and finally decided that he had sat around feeling sorry for himself for too long and needed to take action.

Elizabeth's hurt had finally channeled into anger, and when she was angry, she needed to keep herself busy. After she had Chase's bags taken to London, she began cleaning her room, and downsizing her possessions. It was obvious that she and Chase were not going to be, and she needed to find a job and a new place to live and rather quickly. She had several appointments to look at flats the next day and had an interview set up for the following week. She knew she could survive on her savings for awhile if she could not find a job, but hoped that she would not have to exhaust her finances.

In the meantime, she was separating the clothing that she was getting rid of. She had a pile that was garbage and another that she was donating to those who were less fortunate. A gentle knock rapped at the door before it slowly opened.

"Gerard, you can just throw the bags on my chair," she said, not bothering to turn around to look at him.

Footsteps slowly crossed the room and came to stand behind her. As they lingered, she could feel him, feel the heat he emanated on her body, and feel his eyes staring at her back.

"You can turn around and walk right back out the way you came in," she said blithely.

"I'm not leaving," he said, "There's a lot we need to talk about."

"I have nothing to say to you."

"Oh, I find that hard to believe. If nothing else, I know you wanna scream at me and call me an arse or whatever kind of British cuss words you can come up with."

"Arse does not even begin to cover it, but you aren't worth my breath."

"You know that's not true, I was worth a whole lot more than that the other night," he said, deliberately trying to goad her into turning around to face him.

Elizabeth winced at the mention of the other night, and through gritted teeth said, "I would suggest you not bring up the other night."

Chase knelt down behind her, "Why? It needs to be brought up. You and I both know you want to scream at me and you need to know why I left."

"I don't care why you left."

"Well if that's true, turn around and look at me. Tell me to my face that you don't care, because you and I both know that you are lying to yourself."

"Why are you here Chase? Are you here to humiliate me some more?" She finally turned to face him, "Maybe this time, you can actually shag me and then leave me lying naked on a bed, mortified. I get it, okay. I get that I'm a virgin and wasn't experienced enough for you and your rock star image. You didn't need to come here to tell me that again, so sod off and leave."

"Is that what you seriously think, that you weren't experienced and that's why I left? Are you crazy?"

"Are you going to sit here and insult me now on top of everything? You need to leave Chase; I don't want to hear what you have to say about how you rejected me."

"No, you need to hear what I have to say, because I may not have handled things properly, but I am not the bad guy here, and I'm not going to walk out of here with you thinking that. I left you that night, because I wasn't going to have your first time be some drunken romp between the two of us. I needed to get out of that suite, because I wanted to be with you more than I wanted my next breath, and if I stayed I was going to take you right then and there, and I wasn't going to do that because I know how important someone's first time is, especially when you've waited this long and have the notions about love that you do. I meant everything I said to you that night about how I felt about you. Yes, I fucked up, but I came back and you weren't there. I left you that night, but you left me too."

As much as Elizabeth wanted to believe everything he was saying, he had already hurt her, and she wasn't going to set herself up again. "Are you finished?"

"No, I'm not. I have missed you so much the past few days. I have been lost without you, and as much as you won't admit it to me, I know you've missed me too." Chase reached into his pocket and pulled the blue box out, placing it on the floor between the two of them. "I'm sorry that I hurt you, but I didn't mean to. I wasn't trying to. If you want me to spend my life making it up to you, I will, but you need to tell me so." Chase stood and walked out of her room and into the one that he had been occupying the week before.

Elizabeth sat on the floor, staring at the light blue box that said Tiffany & Co. Her hands shook as she picked it up off the floor and slowly pulled the white ribbon from it. She lifted the lid and gasped when she saw the three stone, emerald cut, platinum set engagement ring that was inside.

Her head became cloudy and she suddenly felt ill, running to the bathroom and kneeling in front of the toilet. She began dry heaving but nothing more, as she had not eaten that day. In fact, she had barely eaten anything since she left Chase in London four days earlier.

Chase had just laid down on his bed when he heard her heaving through the bathroom door. He sprung up and threw the door open dropping to his knees, and gathering her hair back and out of her face.

"Shhh, honey, calm down, it's okay."

Elizabeth tried to regain her composure when she realized she was still clutching the ring box in her right hand. "IT'S NOT OKAY!" she yelled at him, as she pushed him backwards off his haunches so that he fell on his ass. She then threw the ring box at him, hitting him in the chest, before it bounced to the floor. He stared down at the box. He knew she would initially be hostile towards him, but this was certainly not the reaction he expected.

She stood up and turned to go back to her room. Oh no you don't, Chase thought. He agilely leapt up from the floor and came up behind her wrapping his arms around her waist and lifting her off the floor.

"Chase, get off of me!" she screamed as she kicked at his legs. She made contact with one of his shins and he grunted in pain. He threw the shower door open and turned the faucet on. "Wh-what are you doing?" she demanded.

Chase's answer was to dump Elizabeth under the cold stream of water. She yelled out from the chill. "I think you need to cool off," he said smugly before turning and walking back into his bedroom, picking the ring up off the floor as he did.

Elizabeth slammed the faucet off and stalked into his bedroom, "You are a fucking wanker! Who in the bloody hell do you think you are?" She stood in front of him, scowling and demanding answers, her hands on her hips, dripping all over the hardwood floor.