Chapter 22

My after lunch visit home with Marilyn degenerated into an all out fuckfest. I managed to hold my own again but after I'd given them all a good ride I was as wasted as they were. We didn't even get up and go to supper. We just cuddled up together and dropped off.

It was odd, but before I'd drifted off I was sure we'd wake in an hour or three and go to the kitchen to at least fix a snack. We didn't though; we slept through the night. Of course we woke at sunrise. I didn't know about the girls but I felt slept out when my eyes opened.

We headed for the master bath to get started on the day. Neither the shower nor the hot tub would hold all of us, a fact I intended to have Charlie remedy today sometime. While I was at it I might as well have him enlarge the bed too. We made do this morning with four women in the tub and three in the shower. Of course I had to alternate to keep from showing favoritism.

After the girls had themselves presentable I had Charlie move us to the mess hall and we took a table. We were here so early that no other customers had been allowed in yet. That didn't signify to Jane though, or Jocklyn either. She came right over with a pot of coffee and started taking orders right away.

The girls did a little teasing while we waited for the food, but I think it was mostly to keep themselves in shape since they went pretty easy on me. I took it like a man, with my mouth shut and my face red. Then Karen had a question.

"How is Charlie coming along with his interviews?" she asked.

"I haven't checked in about them yet. Why don't you ask him?" I asked.

"Because I didn't think of it. I haven't had my phone in my head as long as you and I'm just not used to it," she said, and then stuck her tongue out at me.

"What's this phone in your head deal?" Jackie asked.

"Yeh, and what interviews are you talking about?" Marilyn asked.

"Things are moving so fast we can't even keep up. Charlie can put a cell phone, or something like it, in your head and you can talk to other people that have them without even opening your mouth. It's really fun for a while but pretty soon you get used to it," Karen told them.

"The interviews she was asking about are for all the women. You'll probably have one too. He's going to ask you about any of the men here you know about. It's a little like questioning suspects on the TV detective shows, except you aren't one of the suspects. He wants to get hints about the men that have committed crimes so he can satisfy some rule the aliens have about sifting through their minds. I think it's like probable cause the TV shows are always going on about," Wanda said, and then they all looked at me.

"That's exactly what it is. Their laws don't allow them to just read everything that's in a person's mind just in case they find some wrongdoing. They have to get at least a hint some other way first. After they get a lead they can communicate with a judge and get permission for a full fishing trip inside the suspect's head," I told them.

"Well what if they don't find anything?" Marilyn asked.

"I don't know. Think the question to Charlie and see what he says," I said.

"Is he reading my mind already?" she asked, slightly alarmed.

"No, he just finished installing your phone and you might as well make sure it works," I said.

"I didn't feel anything," she said.

"He tries to keep you from feeling it, and he does a damned good job. At least he did on me," I said.

I guess she asked him right then, because he came on and said he'd just tell us all at once, and proceeded to. It was basically the same thing I'd told them but in more of a legalese type tone. I could pretty much tell they were nearly as tired of it by the end as I was.

"Wow, will this phone work anywhere or do we need to worry about how many bars we have," Jackie asked.

"No, it will work anywhere, and if you are in danger you can just tell Charlie to bring you home, and he will. Of course that won't help if you're in trouble with me," I said, and got a chance to laugh at them for once.

"Excuse me Billy Joe. I've received a message from above. The chief administrator of the department that controls this experimental project has arrived and he wants you to come up and talk to him," Charlie said.

"Please ask him to turn his palms up," I said.

"What? I don't understand," Charlie said.

"Please ask the chief administrator to turn his palms up," I said, repeating it.

"But how will that help?"

"Then he can want in one hand, shit in the other, and see which one gets full the quickest," I said.

Charlie didn't sound like he thought the old joke was very funny, but at least the girls all giggled.

"I don't really think we would be wise to do it that way Billy Joe," Charlie said, trying to use a tone that sounded insistent.

"Very well. You can pretty much spell any phrase from earth can't you Charlie?" I asked.

"Of course," he said, and sounded slightly huffy about it.

"Good. I'd like for you to print a nice message for the chief administrator of the department and send him the printed version," I said.

"Very well. What should the message say?" he asked.

"FUCK OFF."

"But Billy Joe, he is a very important man. That position is very high in the bureaucracy," Charlie said.

"Can you defend us from the surface against anything they might attack with," I asked.

"I can from anything they currently have in orbit, and even as high as the administrator is, I don't think he can just call a military ship of the line on a whim," he said.

"Good. Send the message I dictated. By the way, maybe you should check in with the union men again. Are any of the crew of the new ship union members?" I asked.

"Of course. The vessels here are patrol types, they are not combat units. All of their crew members except for the officers are in the union, and all the AI's are also," he said.

"Then if push comes to shove the officers are going to have hell giving us any problems aren't they?" I asked.

"You are certainly correct on that score. The union members would like nothing better than to get involved in documented illegal orders, especially if they are intended to be carried out against civilians, of any species.

"Oh, excuse me for a few seconds. That is unfortunate, or very fortunate - depending on your point of view," Charlie said, and sounded odd for a few seconds.

"Mind explaining?" I asked, after a minute or so of silence from Charlie.

"The chief administrator did not appreciate the humor of your FUCK OFF message. He had his ship's captain release a virus attack against me," he said.

"And?"

"Oh, it didn't have any chance of succeeding. It was written by a biological being. It is considered an act of war though," he said.

"Will that make any difference?" I asked.

"Well it probably will make a lot of difference to the chief administrator and all the naval officers aboard the two ships. Participating in an act of war without proper authority and authentication is treason. The law is very narrow and very specific. The penalty is death.