Chapter 2

The gist of LostGirl's story began with her father, Sergei, an ethnic Russian engineer transferred to Estonia during the Soviet era. Sergei, like most Russians who transferred or otherwise immigrated to Estonia was not welcomed by the Estonians, who resisted what they considered the 'Russification' of their society. Sergei understood this and worked hard to fit in, finally wedding a beautiful young Estonian woman named Kaisa. Rather than help Sergei, this marriage alienated Kaisa from most of her family and friends. The other ethnic Russians eventually accepted Kaisa, but Sergei lost out on opportunities for advancement when he decided to remain with his wife in Estonia.

The couple was blessed with two children, Toomas and his younger sister Kristel. The large number of Russians in Estonia required a separate school system as most Russians spoke little Estonian, and many Estonians spoke no Russian. Sergei's friends were surprised Sergei sent Toomas to the Estonian schools. Sergei hoped that this would help Kaisa regain some favor with her family and was disappointed when this didn't happen.

In the beginning, Toomas was not accepted by his classmates. Slowly, he found grudging acceptance at school, but became defiant and argumentative with his parents. Because of Toomas' open rebellion and the lack of acceptance that the young couple found from the Estonian side of the family, Kristel was sent to a Russian school to begin her education. Kristel and her brother became quite close in spite of their growing cultural and educational differences.

Kristel's initial discomfort in the Russian school was soon replaced with a love of learning. Even though the school had political courses, such as scientific communism, it also offered a wide range and freedom of course material that allowed students to specialize as early as high school. Kristel loved the study of the past; history fascinated her. She researched the history of Estonia and the Baltic region and decided that she wanted to become a historian. Her grades were top drawer, and if her school had ranked students she would have been in the top ten in her class.

In 1991 with the break-up of the old Soviet Union, Estonia became a free and democratic country. Even though that break-up was peaceful, it provided no solution for the Russian's living in Estonia. The conditions of the break-up provided only for the soldiers and sailors stationed at bases in Estonia, allowing them to eventually return home. No provisions were made for the engineers, doctors and other professionals who were mainly concentrated in the cities located in the northern part of the country. These Russians who made up nearly 30% of the population had no where to go, so they stayed.

Kristel and her brother stayed in their separate schools as things changed around them. By the time her brother graduated the dual systems gave preference to Estonian students for positions at college and at technical schools. Toomas, who had been only an average student, was given a position at a vocational school to become an automobile mechanic.

Kristel, with her fascination of Estonian history, was in a tougher situation. The council that ranked Russian students for the few scholarships available gave more weight to science and math, as those technical areas were more in line with the needs of modern Estonia. The council also did not see much future for an ethnic Russian becoming an Estonian historian and so did not offer Kristel even a partial scholarship at any of the state supported universities. Her parents offered to help, but Kristel knew that a four-year university degree was beyond their reduced means. Kristel decided to work instead, and after almost a month searching, her mother was able to secure her present position at The Three Sisters.

At that point in her story, LostGirl / Kristel realized that we had been talking for almost five hours. Bill apologized for monopolizing her day off and asked if they could talk later. She told him that she wanted to hear more about his life but had a family obligation for that evening. Bill asked if they could talk after her work some evening and she told him she would be off about 7 PM the next day (which was about 11 AM his time). She told him she would probably eat first and talk to him afterwards. Then she was gone.

Bill spent the rest of the day searching the Internet for information about Estonia. He found The Three Sisters Hotel, which was one of only two five-star hotels in Tallinn. The hotel didn't look like a five-star hotel, but the prices 300 - 600 Euros per night sure did. Bill wondered how much of that was paid to housekeepers. He studied everything that Wikipedia and other online sources had on Estonia and found that most of what she had told him was typical of the current situation although most online sources didn't have any information on the current bias against emigrated Russians.

They IM'd almost every day for the next several weeks and LostGirl, now Kristel, was adamant that Bill tell her everything about himself as she told him of herself and her world. Bill's world, as it existed, was confined to the computer and to his home. Kristel was as good a listener as she was storyteller. Cautiously, Bill didn't tell her of his Lotto winnings but did relate the loss of his wife. She was sympathetic and gradually drew him out about it and helped as he dealt with his unresolved feelings. Through this Bill found that she was a warm and caring person, very unlike her LostGirl nickname. Their talks became the focal point of each of their days. Kristel passed up opportunities to go out with friends to stay home and talk with Bill who left the management of his investments early to spend additional time with Kristel.

Surprisingly they spent almost no time talking on the telephone. Kristel told him that her written English, broken but improving, was much better than her spoken English. Bill knew almost no Russian, and so they communicated with their fingers. The first time they spoke on the phone her voice was very hesitant, almost shaky and yet very feminine. At times, he had to strain to hear what she said. Kristel was unsure of her English and Bill knew even less Russian. There were many awkward pauses, the most awkward was toward the end of one call, when Bill quietly said, "I love you."

The pause after that voiced hope was almost painful to Bill. There was no way to move back from having said it and yet as the pause lengthened he was sure that he had spoiled their relationship, sending him into a near panic. Then in almost a whisper, he heard something, something obviously not English. It sounded like "ya lublue tibya" and was followed by the click of her hanging up the phone. Bill struggled to write down what he thought he heard and then nervously Googled it. Google returned, "Did you mean: 'ya lublu tebya.'" He then clicked on the new phrase which returned many entries, the first of which was "'Ya lublu tebya' say the Russians... 'I love you', say the English." His emotions finally broke and he wept with joy.

Bill had a million thoughts. He knew she was at work on her break and also knew it would be several hours before he could talk with her online. What would it be like? Would she regret having said it or did she even mean it? Maybe she was just translating what he had told her? Bill just hoped that she would be online today so he could talk to her about it. He was so excited that he just could not sit still, he had to be doing something. On a whim Bill started looking at airline bookings.

Bill's passport was several years old, so he dug it out to make sure that it was still valid. Estonia was a part of Europe, but he wasn't sure if entry or exit visas were needed. He found out that they were not for up to three months travel. The round trip flight was expensive at over $6,900 for business class, but money was not really a problem. Bill decided that he would look for a residence when he entered the country, but would book a week or so at The Three Sisters. The only question in his mind was 'Would she want him to come?'

The time passed slowly. It was amazing how slowly time passed as Bill watched the clock. Bill decided that he had to do something or go crazy so he put on his suit to go swimming in the pool. That led to the discovery that the pool badly needed a cleaning, which pointed out a need to back flush the system and adding new chemicals. That required a trip to the store to buy pool chemicals, which Bill was in line to buy when he looked at his watch and panicked realizing that Kristel had been off work and home for 20 minutes, probably wondering where he was. Bill ignored the strange looks he received as he walked off, leaving his buggy full of pool chemicals in the line. He was home in ten minutes, luckily not hitting any speed traps, and had his computer up in another two minutes. He smiled when he saw that Kristel was online waiting for him.

Although Bill had waited and tried to stay busy, the one thing he had not thought about was what to say to her when he saw her again. Bill wanted to affirm his feelings but at the same time didn't want to scare her off. He felt he had moved pretty fast, maybe too fast for her. He didn't want her to feel smothered and yet on the other hand, didn't want to act as if he had cold feet. Bill decided to play it cool and work the conversation around to their feelings. There were the normal greetings, and then she typed, "Did you say that you loved me or was I dreaming that?"