You're Not Wearing Any Clothes! - Cover

You're Not Wearing Any Clothes!

Copyright© 2007 by Ton8ty

Chapter 1

Humor Sex Story: Chapter 1 - A private secluded Nude Day for two. What could possibly go wrong?

Caution: This Humor Sex Story contains strong sexual content, including Ma/Fa   Fa/Fa   Consensual   Romantic   Reluctant   Mind Control   Lesbian   Humor   DomSub   Humiliation   Oral Sex   Anal Sex   Masturbation   Exhibitionism   Voyeurism   Doctor/Nurse  

Jack

"And I'm horny!" says my lovely significant other as she loosens her firm grip on my manhood. Normally, hearing this sweet GILF (that's a second generation MILF) whisper something like that in my ear would bring a prompt response from me, but today has been a trying day, to say the least. We are sitting in the hot tub on our back deck, overlooking the scene of the crime. The almost full moon above the mountains in the distance is painting contrasting shadows over the deck. Laura has just returned from a quick reconnaissance of the main house and a peek at the security cameras. She dropped her lithe naked body back in the tub with a generous splash and has given me an update as to where everyone is and what they are doing. It sounds like we might have a little happy time to ourselves, but, the way the day has gone thus far, I am half expecting a Navy Seal Team to rappel down ropes into the pond from a hovering chopper and assault the utility building.

But, this is actually almost the end of the story and I really do need to start the narrative at the beginning. Today is Saturday, July 14th, and, for some reason, Laura had decided a week ago that we were going to celebrate Nude Day today. Like most captive males, I have learned long ago not to question my mate's declarations when they were made in "that" tone of voice and, besides, I thought at the time, "what could possibly go wrong?" We live on a secluded piece of country property that is very private, so I thought that we could enjoy a quiet day together without clothes. Little did I know!

Laura and I - oh, by the way, I'm Jack H. - met at an AA meeting in town a little over six years ago when she moved to southern Appalachia to be with her eldest daughter and first grandchild. She was at the Monday night open meeting of my home group to check out the situation for this same daughter. What she saw in me, I'll never know. I'm a rather nondescript guy, fifteen pounds overweight on what was once a six foot frame, but now is probably barely 5' 11", approaching 60 years old way too fast, gray haired, and somehow all the extra poundage seems to have settled to my waistline. What used to fit into a 28" waist size, now takes a crowbar to cram into a size 34.

My ex divorced me while I was in rehab and I had carefully avoided the fairer sex for most of my time in sobriety. So when Laura deftly cut me out of the herd and laid claim to my soul, I was shocked, amazed and mystified. I must admit that I didn't put up much of a struggle. Since then, I have earnestly proposed marriage on a number of occasions, but she doesn't want to chance ruining a good thing, and I'm willing to settle for joint custody.

She is a wonderful example of what a mature woman can be with a little effort, great genes and proper planning. She is tall at 5'7" and I won't risk physical disfigurement by revealing her actual weight, other than to say that it's less than 150 lbs., or, at least, that's what she tells me. There is just a hint of lines at the corners of her wide set icy blue eyes and around her charming smile. Her hair is short and naturally curly, I think, but only her hairdresser knows for sure. It's currently blonde, but that is subject to change without notice. Old photos of her display a variety of hairstyles and colors and she carefully removes any other body hair, so there's nothing to compare. If you look closely, her body shows the toll that the years and gravity have taken on her figure. There is a gentle outward curve to her belly, and a delicate web of stretch marks around it, a slight droop to her delicate breasts, and her hips are certainly a little heavier and wider than what her college pictures show, so that's why I don't look too closely. She'll never see her fiftieth birthday again, but somehow I seem to add years to my age more frequently than she does.

Laura was married to an abusive drunk who fathered her two daughters. He managed to end their suffering by wrapping his car and himself around a tree at a high rate of speed. Her younger daughter had still been in high school at the time, so Laura took over what was left of the family business and put it back on its feet through sheer guts and determination. After she put both girls through college and got them married off, she sold the business for a tidy sum and moved here. When she decided that we were going to be a happy couple, I sold my house in town and we bought a piece of property on the side of a mountain in the middle of nowhere. The closest neighbors, who you will get to meet shortly, live three miles down the road in the valley.

The property we purchased included an old, one story house that we fixed up and lived in while we built the main house. It boasts two small bedrooms, a simple bath and a large open space that serves as living room, dining room, and kitchen. Out behind the house is a small tobacco curing barn that became the garage and utility shed. I added a covered extension down the side of the back of the barn that now serves as a parking area for guests and our small fleet of ATVs and electric carts. When we were laying out the main house, we realized that there wasn't enough level ground to both build the house and to provide room to turn a car around, so we simply trucked in topsoil and covered the gravel construction access drive with earth and sod after the house was finished.

The carts and all the ATVs, except one, have wide, flat, low-pressure tires, so the grassy route between the houses looks more like an extension of the lawn than a thoroughfare. It's only 150 yards or so on a slight upgrade and around the side of the hill, so we often just park in the barn and walk. But when we have groceries or guests to haul, we have what I call "the golf carts" and, if we're just feeling lazy or in a hurry, the ATVs can get us up the hill quickly. I have chased Laura's lovely ass up that hill on every form of transport available at various times when she's been in a frisky mood. Being the gentleman that I am, I always let her win the race, knowing that I can corner her in one of the bedrooms and ravish her properly.

The main house is two full stories plus a third floor master bedroom suite. We have two guest bedrooms and a bath in the west wing of the ground floor, the kitchen in the center under the master bedroom, and a large open living room and dining area in the east wing. The basement has the office, the mini-gym, and the laundry/half-bath under the guest bedrooms, a large, open recreation room in the center, and our one excessive indulgence in the back corner of the east wing. That extravagance is a home theater with a large screen high resolution monitor, plush rocking armchairs and a superb sound system. The room is well sound proofed, so we can enjoy ourselves whether we're watching sports on TV, a movie, or a hard-core DVD.

The hillside that we built the house on slopes from north to south, so the basement recreation room opens onto the ground floor deck while the main foyer on the northern side of the second floor is at ground level. The southern exposure is mostly glass and provides a panoramic view of the mountains in the distance and the valley below as well as ample sunshine in the winter. Large solar panels mounted on the roof provide a slight surplus of power so, if we're careful about our usage, the monthly electric bill from the local utility is minimal. We have a small bank of lithium-ion batteries and a little gasoline generator to provide backup power for my servers and for when a tree limb comes down on the overhead lines somewhere.

Our water comes from the spring just up the hill that keeps the swimming pond clear and cool. I had an existing small pool enlarged to the size of an Olympic swimming pool and lined with neoprene. The pond isn't more than eight feet deep at the deepest and an assortment of floats get used regularly. The end of the pond nearest the house and deck has a sand beach that was trucked in, so it is quite pleasant to lie out in the sun most of the year. This secluded hide-away seemed ideal for a leisurely day of private nude relaxation. I wasn't in the least bit worried. I had even arranged a little surprise for my lover.

Laura

I'm always slightly amazed when I wake up curled up next to him in our king size bed. I love to watch him while he's in the last minutes of sleep in the morning. He seems so peaceful and content that I have to pinch myself to make sure that I'm not still dreaming. Jack hasn't had an easy life and now he seems to be so happy that my heart wants to jump out of my chest. He has been so good to me in the years that we've been together and I now have everything that I could have ever wished for.

He is stretched out on his back which means he was probably snoring loudly enough to raise the dead at some point during the night. The sounds of the morning invade my senses as I carefully remove my earplugs and put them away on the headboard where they live during the day. Small compromises allow us to share ourselves and our worlds in harmony. The birds are chattering loudly just outside in the sunlight that is pouring through the glass wall of the bedroom. It looks like our nude adventure day is turning out to be everything the weatherman promised: sunny, clear and moderate temperatures.

I slip out of bed without disturbing my man and pad quietly into the master bath to relieve myself. We both sleep in the nude, so we're already set for the day. After I slip back into the bedroom, I carefully collect the clothes that Jack was wearing the previous evening and stuff them into the closet. He is such a meticulously habitual man! I could predict his every movement if necessary. He always arises after our morning lovemaking, freshens up in the bathroom, and then puts on the underwear, socks, pants, shirt and shoes that he had laid out for himself the night before. I can tell you which pocket his car keys are in and which one his wallet is in. His pocket change and his AA chip are always in his right front pants pocket and his pocket knife is in the left front. Always! The man is so predictable and that's one of the things that I adore about him.

I manage to ease back into bed without awakening him and survey the scene. A handsome, naked man with the beginnings of a morning erection showing through the sheet is enough to get my juices started. Sliding my hand gently down his chest, I manage to slip the sheet down his wonderful body until I can rest my palm on the inside of his thigh just below his balls. I can hear his breathing become a little quicker and I can feel that I don't have much longer to play with him before he is awake. My nipples are already beginning to report for duty in anticipation of the pleasures we'll soon share. The delightful tension makes me warm and soft inside. I carefully cup his ball sack in my hand and lower my lips to the head of his circumcised penis. I pause to enjoy the manly aroma of his genitals. God, I love this man!

My tongue sneaks out from between my lips and I gently lick the crown of his manhood. His cock begins to stiffen further as his breathing becomes deeper and more regular. Though I can't see, I'm sure that he is awake now and looking down at me with those deep blue eyes. He is certain to be thanking God for another day, because that is what he always does first thing in the morning. But, that doesn't stop me from sliding his gorgeous cock further into my mouth as it reaches its fully erect seven inch length. Not too big and not too thick, it is just the right size for me. This cock has been the source of so many orgasms that I've lost count. I know he is awake when his hand gently strokes down my spine from the back of my neck towards my ass. He loves to fondle my ass and I never complain when he does. It's always the first place his hands search out whenever we have the least bit of privacy, and I mean the least bit! He is so predictable! Just as I get my mouth as far down his love tool as I can handle, my damn cell phone rings.

SHIT! Who could be calling at this hour? I roll over and grab the obnoxious device and glance at the caller ID. It's my dear eldest daughter, Post-partum Annie. What the hell does she need? Oh my God, maybe something has happened to the baby! Smiling at Jack, I whisper, "Its Annie. I'd better answer it."

Annie

I think, "One of these days, I'm gonna strangle that Son of a Bitch!" as my husband and the father of my children slips out the door with a wave of his hand and a sheepish grin on his face. "How can he abandon me at a time like this?" is my next thought. The tears start flowing down my cheeks. I'm left with a six year old daughter, twin five year old nephews, and a new-born to care for and the bastard promised to stay home this Saturday and help. My heart is racing and I really don't know how much more of this that I can stand! Ever since the baby was born, I've been on the verge of absolute despair. And now, with my sister Deni out of town and her boys to mind as well, I'm gonna lose it. I just know it! "Come on, Mom, please answer the phone. PLEASE!" I beg silently to myself.

Finally the phone on the other end stops ringing and the familiar voice says, "Hello, sweetheart. What's up?"

"Oh, Mom! I need your help! George just ran off to work and I've got all the kids to care for." Panic starts to creep into my voice and I know that I sound shrill. "The bastard promised to help with the kids today, but as soon as his boss calls, he bugs out! I don't know what to do!"

"Well, honey, you can bring the kids out here, if you want. But, today we're celebrating Nude Day, so we plan on going naked all day," says the voice on the other end of the phone.

"Oh, Mom! I can't do that! My body is so fat and ugly right now, I couldn't possibly do that!" I croak.

"Why not, honey? It'll just be us here. And I'm sure the kids wouldn't mind skinny dipping in the pond."

"Are you sure, Mom?"

"Of course, dear. We haven't invited anyone else over. We had planned on a quiet day by ourselves, but we'd love to see you and the grandkids."

"Ok, Mom, I'll call you when I'm on the road. Thanks. You're a lifesaver."

Jack

I reach over as she slams the phone closed and gently put my fingers under her chin. Without saying a word, I lean toward her and our lips brush together. My cock had started to lose its hardness when the phone rang and, by now, was drooping.

"Would you like me to fix you some breakfast, my dear?"

Her face brightens and she replies, "You don't mind, do you?"

"Are you referring to fixing breakfast, the mob coming over, or not getting my morning blow job?" I respond and, before she can reply, continue, "No, of course I don't mind. I'll meet you in the kitchen, darling." The smile in her eyes tells me she appreciates my attempt at humor. Before I climb out of bed, I reach over and gently pinch her left nipple, bringing a moan from deep in her throat.

"We'll have ample time together later on. I promise," I say, not realizing what the day has in store for us.

I'm momentarily stunned when I can't find my clothes where I always leave them. Glancing over at Laura, I notice a huge grin on her face. Tossing my pillow at her, I head for the bathroom to empty the bladder and make myself presentable. When I get downstairs to the kitchen, I see my lovely mate's naked body already at the sink.

"Would you like bacon and eggs, cereal or a bagel, dear?" I ask as I sneak over and wrap my arms around her. I bend down and nuzzle the side of her neck as I gently cup a breast in each hand.

"Hmmm," she whispers, "I know what I really want to taste."

"Well, I'm not on the menu," I reply, "and, unfortunately, neither are you. And I'm going to have to be careful today."

"You're right," she replies, feeling my dick start to stiffen against her ass cheeks. "We should have plenty of chances to slip away for some relief during the day."

I asked her again what she would like for breakfast.

"Surprise me," is her reply, little knowing the surprises that are in store for all of us.

I fix a hearty breakfast of scrambled eggs, bacon, toast and juice and as we're finishing up, her cell chimes again.

"Annie?" I ask.

"No, it's Maria."

That's interesting, I think to myself as I clear the breakfast dishes and head for the sink. Maria is our ultra sexy young Puerto Rican housekeeper who thoroughly cleans both the houses for us on Mondays and Thursdays. I wonder what she might want. She regularly flaunts her generous boobs while working around the place, her work blouse unbuttoned as far as she dares. It would be too much to ask for to have Maria working around the house in her birthday suit.

Sweet Jesus!

Just the thought of her undressed is enough to give my dick a rise. I suspect that I may have to make a few trips to the pond to cool off today. Maybe I'll have a quick dip before the kids get here, I consider, as I finish the dishes and wipe down the counter. While I'm gazing out the window, deep in thoughts of smooth, young, dark brown Puerto Rican skin, my sweetheart sneaks up behind me, reaches around my waist and eases one hand around my dick and the other around my balls.

"Maria needs to take Monday off to pick up her sister at the airport," she says in a throaty voice. I'm instantly half erect. By the time she finishes saying, "I hope you don't mind if she comes by to clean the houses today, and, yes, I did tell her about Nude Day," I was hard as a rock.

"Today could turn out to be a difficult day for this old man," I think to myself. Aloud I announce, "I'm going to go take a swim."

Annie

By the time I get all the kids and their things loaded in the van in the driveway, I can't see through the tears pouring down my face. I've already yelled at Ashleigh to where she is sobbing and I don't know how I'm going to be able to drive. The baby is screaming, even though I just changed him and he's been fed. Everything is going horribly wrong and I just can't cope. I almost jump out of my skin when an arm slides around my shoulders. Spinning around, I see that it belongs to my neighbor, Julie.

"Are you OK?" she asks in genuine concern.

"NO!" I scream and then collapse into her arms. "I don't know what is wrong with me. I can't cope!" I sob between the tears.

"Here, let me help you. I know how hard it is right after you've had a baby," Julie says in a soothing voice. "Just sit down and breathe deeply."

Julie fishes baby John out of his carrier and holds him to her shoulder. The tiny traitor immediately stops crying and snuggles into her neck. Julie chats easily with Ash and pretty soon has her and the twins laughing at her simple jokes. The deep breathing seems to help. I'm starting to calm down and my eyes aren't as full.

"Thank you, Julie. You don't know how much I needed that. You're a real friend. Would you stick around for a few minutes while I call Mom? I promised that I'd call her when we were on our way."

"Oh, you're going up to the mountains?" she asks.

"Yes, George went in to work on his day off and left me alone. He promised to help me take care of the kids today and then he just abandoned me!" I croak as the tears began to flow in earnest again.

"Easy there, dear. It'll be OK," she soothes. Baby John is already asleep in her arms. "Call your Mom."

The phone only rings a couple times before she answers with her usual, "Hello, sweetheart. What's up?"

"Hi, Mom. I've got the kids in the van and we're almost ready to leave. Do you need me to stop and pick up anything on the way?" I volunteer, but I'm relieved when she insists that she has everything she needs. I know I couldn't handle a stop along the way. Not one where I would have to get all the kids out of the van and take them into a store somewhere. My nerves are almost completely wrecked. What is wrong? I wasn't anything like this after Ash was born. I think I'm going insane.

"We'll be there shortly," I say and am relieved when Mom says goodbye and the call ends. Julie has tucked John back into his carrier and I give her a huge hug when she steps away from the van.

"Have fun today," she whispers in my ear. I'm still really apprehensive but I don't really have anywhere else to go. Julie works from her home and I can't impose upon her for any of her valuable time. And I'm sure not going to tell her that I'm scared to death to go to Grandma's and spend the day with no clothes on. God, I would absolutely die if anybody else were to find out. Little did I know what was in store for us today!

Jack

Laura's lovely naked body is standing on the beach as I finish my eighth lap of the little pond. The sun is well above her left shoulder and her silhouette is very pleasing to my eye. I pull myself up out of the water on the ladder of the little dock that juts out into the pond. I'm pleased to note that I'm all shriveled up and not likely to embarrass myself.

"Annie called," she says, "they should be here in fifteen or twenty minutes."

"I guess we both had better wander down to the old place to collect them," I say, saving her the necessity of asking or ordering me to come along with her. Her smile is my reward for having made her life easier once again. Now, don't get me wrong; I don't understand women any better than I understand God, but I've been around long enough to know a leading statement or question when I hear one. And I love the woman more than anything and enjoy the rewards I reap from keeping that love obvious.

"Do we need to take anything down with us?"

"I can't think of anything. The carts are down there, so we should be able to walk," is her reply. She holds out her hand as I come off the dock and I take it in mine. Twisting it gently around her back, I pin her to my chest and kiss her luscious lips hungrily. My other hand wraps around her waist and drops down to fondle her ass. The lady puts up no struggle and just melts into my arms, her tongue slipping between my lips and dueling with mine.

"We may just have to celebrate like this more often," I remark as we break our kiss.

"We really should get moving before you need to take another swim, honey," she says softly.

"Yes, dear."

We stroll leisurely across the deck and around the side of the house to the grassy lane that leads down to the old house. Fortunately there are enough trees and plenty of undergrowth on either side of the place to screen us from the road. Besides, we will be able to hear an approaching vehicle long before it is right at the driveway that cuts between the foliage and curves around the house to the barn. There is little chance of our being spotted walking through the shadows holding hands. We could probably pass for teenage lovers from a distance. Well, maybe if the viewer's eyesight was really poor. At that moment, we don't have a care in the world.

I punch the combination to unlock the house into the keypad at the back door and we step inside. After checking around to make sure that all is in order, we wind up back in the middle of the kitchen wrapped up in another lip lock. I am going down for the third time when the security system lets out the little beep that signals that a vehicle has come into the driveway.

"That must be Annie and the kids," she bubbles and whips out of my grasp to peer out the window.

"That's not Annie's van!" she exclaims. "What is a florist van doing here, I wonder?"

Oh, crap! The delivery wasn't supposed to happen until after lunch. I try to look as innocent as I can.

The van pulls up to the front of the house and the driver pulls a long box out of the truck. He walks up to the door, opens the screen and knocks firmly.

"Who's there?" asks Laura.

"Delivery for Laura Martin," is the reply.

"Please leave it on the porch," she stammers.

"I need a signature."

Laura looks at me while I'm examining a nonexistent speck on the ceiling. Steeling up her courage, she opens the front door and reaches out to take the clipboard the delivery man is holding. She calmly signs the delivery receipt and hands it back to him. It isn't until he hands her the florist box that his jaw visibly drops and he gasps, "You not wearing any clothes!"

"Thank you," she replies as she closes the door. Turning around and boring holes through my body with her eyes, she calmly asks, "Now, who could have sent these?" Putting the box down on the kitchen counter and opening it carefully, she pulls out the large arrangement of cut flowers.

"There's no card," she notices, holding the flowers to her chest.

"You really shouldn't have," she whispers as she puts her arm around my neck. Kissing me gently, she adds, "They're lovely. Thank you very much."

Laura

"I can't believe that he did that," is my first thought followed closely by, "I can't believe I did that!"

I just stood in an open doorway in front of a complete stranger in my birthday suit! Somehow I'm shocked that I didn't feel any more embarrassed. I boldly stood there as if it was completely natural! I don't even think I blushed.

"Did you see the look on his face?" I ask Jack.

The next thing I know we are both dissolving in gales of laughter. Thankfully, the pretty bouquet of flowers is on the kitchen table, because the next thing I know, we are sprawled on the sofa howling like banshees. I'm laughing harder than I have in years! As our mad laughter begins to die from lack of breath, the arriving vehicle beep sounds again. Gasping for breath, I say, "Now who could that be?"

"Probably Jehovah's Witnesses," he jokes.

"Oh, Lord, no! That's all we need," I say, straightening up enough to peer through the side window and see Annie's van pull around the back.

"It's the grandkids!"

We hustle out the back door just in time to see the van back into one of the covered guest spots. Annie climbs out of the driver's door and I embrace her in a long and tearful hug.

Jack

I slide open the side door and extricate the kids, one by one, from their car seats. "Hi, Papaw," greets Ashleigh, melting my heart. She is the cutest little girl that I've ever had the pleasure of knowing, but I may have to admit a little bias. She's so much like her mother and Laura that it's impossible not to notice. Curly light brown hair frames her round face and the wide set big blue eyes could tame any man. Her innocence is so genuine that I just want to hug her forever once I lift her out of the van.

"You're not wearing any clothes, Papaw," she says to break my reverie.

"You're right, sweetheart. We're all going to enjoy a day without clothes," I respond with a chuckle as I ease her down to her feet. "Now, you run on into the little house and get undressed."

"Oh, goody!" she squeals and dashes off toward the back door. Telling Ashleigh to take her clothes off is like telling a child they can have free run of a candy store. When she was a toddler, she could pull her outfits off almost as fast as her parents could put them on. Definitely a free spirit.

"Hi, Papaw," chime Harry and Gerry as I unbuckle them from their safety confinements. Neither needs any assistance in clambering out of the van. Again, the family resemblance is unmistakable. They too dash off in a flurry of youthful exuberance to follow their cousin.

I see that Laura has baby John cradled in her arms, so I take the opportunity to hug my almost step-daughter. Annie is an almost exact copy of her mother. Maybe an inch taller, she has the same slender frame, pretty round face with blue eyes and a head of curly hair that is red this week and pulled back carelessly into a stubby ponytail. Red looks good on her, but, her face is puffy and her eyes are bloodshot from her crying. There are bags under her eyes and she looks unkempt and disheveled. Her normally slender body is overloaded with the weight she gained during her recent pregnancy and even the loose maternity gown she's wearing cannot hide the rolls of fat around her waist and hips. Her normally petite breasts are almost twice their size due to breastfeeding. Pretty much what I would expect a new mother to look like. Poor girl. What women are willing to endure to continue the species always amazes me.

"We'd better get inside before the little darlings have time to destroy the house," I caution, and we head for the back door.

Laura

Seeing my daughter looking like she does makes my heart sink. She isn't making any attempt to care for herself and I think the post-partum depression is tearing her apart. Remembering back to when her younger sister was born, I can remember how overwhelmed I felt with too many cares and not enough support. But, Annie has lots of friends and family to help. My fear is that she is isolating herself from her support group and that her self-esteem is really low.

"I'm going to have to talk with her doctor," I vow to myself.

But, holding a two week old grandchild in my arms is the most wonderful feeling in the world. The baby is so cute. What a joy to behold. My emotions are riding a roller coaster right now, going from extreme worry to giddy joy. Jack starts pushing us toward the house. Oh, well, back to reality.

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