Chapter 47

The school grief counselor came walking toward us, a big smile on his face, like a shark discovering a particularly tasty meal that has no chance of escape.

He held his hand out to Daddy. "Dr. Elliot Driscoll, District Grief Counselor."

Daddy ignored his outstretched hand. "My daughter is just fine. Keep your grimy mitts off her."

He stood up straight and with an offended look on his face said, "I'll have you know that I could prevent your daughter from graduating early."

Daddy looked over at the school secretary, who was trying her best to hide behind the in and out baskets on her desk. "Did you hear that threat?"

"Yes, Sir."

"I'll want a signed statement from you before we leave." He turned to Driscoll. "I am going to keep an eye on you, Dr. Driscoll. If there is even a hint of interference from you, either with my daughter or her plans to graduate early, you won't practice in California again, Sir. And you can take that as a threat or a warning, however you wish. Now go away and peddle your drugs someplace else."

Driscoll looked like he was all set to assert his rights, then glanced over at the secretary and changed his mind. He walked away like any bully that had been shown up; all show and bluster.

Daddy said, "I decided to pick you up before going over to the hospice. Do you need anything? You probably won't be back here today."

"I'll get my books and leave a note for Charlie to get my homework." I wrote a quick note to Charlie, then wrote down what had happened between Daddy and Dr. Driscoll and signed it. I asked the secretary to sign it as a witness. She looked relieved that I had authored and signed the statement. I asked her to make copies for me and her as well as one to put in Dr. Driscoll's box. She assured me that Charlie would get his note.

I left my laptop with Daddy and took a quick trip to my locker. When I got back, we went out to the visitor spaces in the teacher's parking lot.

There was a booster seat in the back of Daddy's BMW. Laurie climbed up in it and grabbed the loose seat belt, giving it to Daddy to put inside the buckle. Both of them looked like they'd done this drill before.

"That's a pretty neat chair you've got there, Laurie."

"I don't need a car seat anymore because I'm big."

"Good for you. Before you know it, you won't need anything."

"One more. When I'm four." She held up he right hand, the fingers spread, then pushed her thumb down with her other hand.

After we got going, Laurie started singing "Jesus Loves Me." We pulled into the hospice lot after the sixth or seventh chorus. There were more cars today but they were away from the building, out of the way, where employees would park.

Daddy asked me to help Laurie get out so I went around to the other side of the car. Once I had the belt unbuckled, she shoved the end over to the side and moved over to me on her knees. She waited just inside the car with her arms out. I picked her up and was all set to put her down when her hug made it clear she wanted me to carry her.

Daddy held the door into the hospice for us, then went ahead of us to the nurses station. He introduced himself and the nurse told him Ms. Patterson would be right with him and directed us to take seats.

We went to one of the conversation areas. I sat on a love seat, figuring Laurie would sit next to me. She stayed on my lap and turned so she could see Daddy and the rest of the seats.

"Did you have a good breakfast, Laurie?"

"Uh huh. I had cereal and milk."

"Good for you. What kind of cereal?"

"The one with the tiger."

"Oh. Frosted Flakes. I used to like that when I was a little girl."

"What kind did you have?"

"Oh, I don't eat too much cereal. Remember the peaches you had at my house?"

"Uh huh."

"Well, I cut up the rest of them and shared them with Jack. And we each had a banana."

She looked at my father. "Daddy John, can I have peaches for breakfast?"

"Sure, Sweetie. Talk to Mama Wanda about that. She's in charge of the food in our house."

A woman came into the room carrying a box. She was dressed in a suit — a skirt with a matching jacket. She looked to be somewhere in her forties. Her hair was pinned up and I could see the beginnings of some gray in with the dark brown. Though she would pass every test for being dressed professionally, she still managed to communicate her femininity.

Her face lit up when Daddy stood. She held out her hand and Daddy reached for the box under her arm and put it on the chair. He stood back up and pulled her into his arms. The way she wrapped her arms around him, it was as if she was the one who had just lost someone and needed comfort.

"Jenny, this is my daughter, Jill and her sister Laurie. Girls, this is Jenny Patterson."

She put out her hand and I started to shake it. Laurie wrapped both of hers around them and the three of us shook hands.

Daddy said, "Vivian was both these girls' mother."

"I'm sorry John. I knew you had a resident here but I didn't connect you with Vivian O'Hara until just now."

"We haven't seen each other for thirteen years."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be, Jenny. I'm beginning to see that she was right. There was no way we would have made it as a family. She had her chance to talk to me and Jill and straighten some things out and I'm happy about that."

"So many of our tenants move on without resolving things with their estranged loved ones. It's always sad."

I said, "I'm just happy that I decided to see her last night. Otherwise I would have been too late."

Jenny glanced at Daddy, then looked me in the eye. "I'm sorry Jill. I thought you knew. She would have waited for you."

I looked at Daddy. "I don't understand."

"Jill, she did things her own way, right up to the last. She used a bobby pin to keep the morphine drip open. She just went to sleep and never woke up. It was too late to do anything when her body quit."

"I gave her that bobby pin. She said she wanted to look pretty."

"Jill, don't you dare feel guilty about this. It isn't anybody's fault. Her insides were being eaten up; she was rotting away. She took care of the things she felt she needed to and then moved on. If there's one thing we both should know, it's that Vivian wasn't the kind of person who would stay around if she didn't want to be there."

Laurie said, "I want to see Mommy."

Jenny looked at my father and he nodded. "OK. Give us a few minutes."

She went over to the nurses station and made a quick phone call, then came back. "It won't be long."

Daddy and Jenny talked about the hospice for a few minutes until the nurse came up and told her the room was ready. Jenny grabbed her box and I stood up with Laurie still in my arms and followed the two of them.

I assumed they had moved her to some other room where the body would be on display for us. She was still in the room I'd visited her in the previous night. She was propped up in bed with the covers pulled up beneath her armpits. Her hair had been brushed and I noticed she had both bobby pins. The IV holder had been wheeled over to the corner and the hose was coiled around the top arm. There were two bags still attached; one was about half full and the other was almost empty.

Laurie took a look at her mother's body. She said, "She doesn't hurt any more." Seeing her totally relaxed body, I realized that the woman I saw had been in constant pain, her face grimacing continuously.

Laurie put her hands together as if she was praying and looked up. "I love you, Mommy." She turned to me. "She's in heaven now."

As we left the room, I admired the simplicity her mother's death was in Laurie's eyes.

Instead of going to the lobby, we turned down the hallway behind the nurses station. Towards the end was a door marked "Hospice Administrator." Jenny opened it and walked in the office. I saw a desk with a woman sitting behind it, talking to somebody over a headset. Jenny went past her and opened another door.