Chapter 24

Mary got a big smile on her face and then stiffened up. I leaned over to Jack. "Is that the smell you were talking about?" I thought I said it quiet enough for only Jack to hear but I guess mothers are good at picking up stuff like that; it must be part of the package.

"Hush, Jill. Let her enjoy it." I would have probably said something stupid if not for Mom's hand on mine and the warm smile on her face.

I looked over at Mary. She was in her own little world and things were good. She was just sitting there, a dreamy smile on her face, looking at the spoonful of stew a couple of inches above her bowl, seeing nothing. Well, nothing that was in the kitchen, that's for sure.

I said to Mom, "You know she's going to be impossible to live with until Charlie calls. And once he gets the OK to come back with us, she'll be worse until we actually pick him up."

She said, "It's not that long ago that her brother was like that. You should have seen him when he got home the night you two met. And the morning after, wondering if he should call you at six in the morning or not."

"Yeah, I was probably just as bad. Daddy finally grabbed my shoulders and pushed me over to the phone. He stood there watching over me while I called 411 for your number and called Jack."

She turned to Mary. "I think it's about time the two of you graduated from the couch."

Mary snapped back into the present. "What? Who told?"

"Nobody told. Charlie's father observed. When you woke up, did you think your shirt worked its way up to your neck and your bra came undone after he covered you two up with the blanket?"

"Oh, God. I'm so embarrassed."

"Don't be. It's part of growing up."

"Now I won't be able to look his father in the face."

"Don't be silly, Mary. He didn't think any less of you. In fact, he commented that you were a lovely girl and he could see why his son was so taken with you. Seeing the two of you on the couch brought back memories of how things were with his wife, before she became pregnant and their lives changed."

"What about you? How did you feel when he told you?"

"To be honest, I think the first thing I felt was relief. And then I felt happy for you and Charlie. Up till then, I wasn't sure if you were ever going to find out that love and sex have absolutely nothing to do with what happened that night you two went out. And I was glad you were able to be with Charlie. A lot of women would push the man away who had been there when they were attacked. Being able to move forward despite what happened took a lot of courage. I was prouder of you at that moment than I've been in a long time."

Jack squeezed my hand and I noticed a couple of tears flowing down his cheeks. It wasn't until he reached over to me and gently brushed my check with his thumb that I realized I was doing the same thing. I looked around and saw that Mom and Mary both had smiles and tears on their faces. Mom held her arms out and Mary fell into them. The two of them just sat there, holding each other, June stroking Mary's hair occasionally.

Mom backed up a bit and looked Mary in the eye. "Have you been taking your pills?"

She hesitated a bit before she said, "Yes."

"Every day? No misses?"

"Mom, it's hard to remember to take them every day."

"Honey, you're going to need to. No matter what. How many have you missed?"

"I don't know. A few."

"When's the last time you forgot?"

"I haven't taken any since day before yesterday because Charlie didn't show up. I had too much on my mind, Mom."

"Mary, I can't let you be with him without some other form of protection. We don't need any babies around here."

"Maybe I can't get pregnant. There were five guys that night and I didn't get pregnant then."

"We don't know that, Honey."

"Huh?"

"Baby, we couldn't take any chances. When you went to see Miriam that day she did a D and C. She cleaned out your uterus, just to make sure."

"Is that why I was so sore after we saw her?"

"That's a big part of it. But I'm afraid you're going to find out that most gynecological exams aren't going to be comfortable. It's just another thing we girls have to put up with."

"But how could you let her do that to me without asking me about it?"

"Baby, there are times I need to make decisions that you can't make by yourself. If it turned out that you were pregnant from that attack, I don't know what I would have done. I'm sorry but I can't see myself just accepting any baby that was a result of that abomination. I know that the baby wouldn't have had anything to do with how it was conceived, but I'm only human. And you couldn't even talk to your brother without getting ill. I couldn't take a chance on you being pregnant when you were in that condition. And I don't think you were in any state of mind to make a rational decision about it."

"I guess. It still feels weird, though. I should have had some say in it."

"Well, it's over. If we knew for sure you were pregnant and I forced you to have an abortion, that might be different. I looked at it as a preventative measure, sort of like a tetanus shot if you stepped on a nail. But I know if I'd asked you to make the final decision, it would have been something you always wondered about. I just want to make sure you don't put yourself in a position where you're forced to make a decision like that again. What would you do if you found out you were pregnant with Charlie's child while you were still a freshman in high school?"

"I don't know. I wouldn't want to face that."

"I know. And it's something you shouldn't have to face. That's why we put you on the pill. But it doesn't do any good if you forget to take it. All it takes is one day without and you can find yourself pregnant. I'll call Dr. Davis tomorrow and see if she has any suggestions, but I'm pretty sure you and Charlie are going to have to use condoms until we can be sure you're protected. Maybe getting you a patch would be a better idea."

"I've heard about some girls getting a shot that lasts for six months. Could we do that?"

"I don't know. I'll talk to Dr. Davis. I've heard of one that lasts three months. You're pretty young to turn off your periods for months at a time. There's going to be a time when you'll want to get pregnant and we need to keep that option open. If you convince your body not to menstruate, it could cause problems down the road. And there are other side effects, too. Some women balloon up like blimps."

"What about an IUD?"

"I'll talk to Miriam. They're usually better for women with more experience than you have. I don't know if the rape would change that or not. Whatever we do, you're going to have to keep your end of the bargain. I'm disappointed we're having this talk. As far as I was concerned, we had it handled when you got your pills. You let me down, Kiddo."

I think that got to Mary more than the idea that she could have gotten pregnant if she and Charlie got together. She sniffed and said, "I'm sorry, Mama. I'll try to do better."

Mom held her a bit tighter and stroked her hair. "Shh, Shh, it's OK. I'm just glad we found out about it now rather than having you come to me in a few months, wondering why you were throwing up every morning."

I said, "Where do you keep your pills, Mary?"

"In my purse."

"If I did that, I'd probably forget them, too. You have to keep them someplace where you'll bump into them every day."

"Where do you have yours?"

"Right in front of the alarm clock. If I don't see them, Jack does and he gives them to me."