Chapter 1: The Auction

"What are you going to offer for the Auction this year Jane?" Matty asked me.

"Same as last time I suppose; '15 hours housework, no sex'. Not much else I feel I can offer even though it didn't make much money last year and it was pretty boring work."

"You don't feel up to offering yourself as an escort like Kathy?" Matty already knew I had strong views on that. She was trying to wind me up and I decided to ignore the remark. She went on, "You could make a lot more money for charity and for yourself. You might even find a boyfriend. What you get out of the housework bit won't pay for a phone call to enquire about a new car let alone buy one."

"Kathy doesn't seem to mind being a part time hooker. She'll probably get bookings for every night of the week and end up being a bit sore between her thighs. In any case I don't need another boyfriend, only just got rid of the last one. You'll do your usual barbecue I suppose? "

"Yeah, I enjoy them and Ken does most of the cooking. It was popular last time and brought in about £200 with the raffle and the games we played." I'd only paid in £45 for fifteen hours of grubby housework, clearing and cleaning the home of old man Hansen whose wife died several years ago. I think it was about the only time in a year he'd had the place cleaned.

The auction Matty referred to was the Auction of Promises the firm organised for one week every year. We were part of a big international insurance group but the auction was only for the U.K. branches. It was done on-line using the firm's intranet that outsiders would not normally have access to, although many small subsidiary and supply firms were connected to it as well so all in all the information reached several thousand people. On a web page we placed a photo ourselves and then gave the service we offered. Underneath people could place their bids for that service. The services ranged from flights in a private plane, to a boating weekend and right down to the lowly service of house cleaning that I offered. Half the money raised went to charity and the participant kept half although most often they gave the full amount to the charity.

Matty logged on and brought up the page. Already there were about fifty entries. Scrolling down she stopped at Kathy's promise. 'Friendly and accommodating escort service. Please state night required.' I noticed she hadn't ticked the 'no sex' box.

She scrolled on to her entry. 'Fun barbecue. Good food, fun and games. You'll have a terrific time. Friday evening only.' She'd ticked the 'no sex' box.

"What shall we put for you, Jane? We've still got that awful mug shot on file we used last time." It was my passport photo and I looked a bit grim in it. She typed in '15 hours housework' and ticked 'no sex'. Then changed it, 'Housework/slave for 15 hours' but left the no sex in place because she knew my views on that subject. My boyfriend had left abruptly with another girl after we'd lived as an item for eight months. I didn't want another relationship or even a one-night stand. "That might get you a better offer than Dan Hansen's," she laughed. Later that day I had an email to verify my entry and somewhat reluctantly I did so. I was still unsure about the 'slave' part but decided to give it a try and I wasn't forced to accept any of the bids.

Next day before work a group of us from the office checked what bids had been put forward. Kathy already had generous offers for three nights. "You'll be walking bow-legged on Monday," one of the girls giggled at her.

"Who said I let them screw me," Kathy demanded.

"We do," we all chorused together and fell about laughing.

Matty had three couples offering ten pounds each. "Not a bad start," she remarked, "Last year only a few booked on the first few days. Many wait until the weekend and discus it with their wives or partners."

Mine just had one from Dan Hansen offering £6 per hour the same as last year. I was disappointed. "It's early days," I said to the others and Matty gave my hand a squeeze. "You don't have to accept the bid," she whispered. I'd told myself that already.

Doreen suggested, "Uncheck the 'no sex' box and then you will get plenty of offers especially from dirty old men with plenty of money. They might even buy you the car!" Everyone joined in the suggestion and this gave rise to many fanciful and improbable scenarios that could happen. I adamantly refused to alter it and I was glad there was some system in place whereby once the 'submit' button had been pressed, the wording of the offer couldn't be altered although it could all be deleted. I was ragged even more the next day when another man had upped the bid to £6.20 an hour. They all seemed to think my photo put people off. Sylvia our supervisor called us back to work so we didn't discuss it further.

Dan had upped the price to £6.30 an hour the next day a derogatory increase according to everyone and their remarks made me feel very depressed and downcast. Matty tried to lift my spirits but didn't succeed. It was just one more thing I had to deal with. The car was my biggest problem. Without it my journey to work was not only expensive, it took nearly two hours because the rural buses didn't connect without a long wait. Going home was not much better although in theory it should have only taken an hour and a half, it was frequently late.