Chapter 18

Brenda had been upset with both her parents since the previous summer. She was mad at her mother for initiating the divorce proceeding. She was very angry with her father for his actions while he was her mother's trustee of the trust Mama had created, and for his later behavior playing the futures markets with money he didn't have.

Somehow, she believed that what they were both doing was being reflected back on her. We all told her that this wasn't the case, but as things worsened, Brenda became more determined in her beliefs concerning this. By the time Walt brought the bogus pay order to our bank for payment, Brenda was becoming sick with her worry, and seemed determined that she too had to share in their guilt.

This was such un-Brenda like behavior, that it confused all of us at first. We didn't really take what she was saying seriously enough in the beginning. When Brenda finally came to me, asking that I use her money to repay the company for the funds my Dad had used to make good on Walt's defaults, I knew we had a serious situation. I went to Joyce and asked her what she thought we should do.

Her advice was to wait and do nothing, and this was what I did. I told Brenda that I'd look into it, and let her know later what needed to be done. I did nothing, hoping she'd get over these unwarranted feelings of guilt.

Georgia wasn't helping things at all. She was constantly trying to incite Brenda against both Walt and Richard. While she blamed Mama for costing her ten percent of her money by appointing Walt to be the trustee of her spendthrift trust, she blamed Walt even more, suspecting that he had incurred the trading losses just to spite her. There was certainly a valid reason for her to be angry. Mama had appointed Walt in retribution, angry at Georgia for going out and hiring a lawyer to attempt to remove the spendthrift provisions contained in the trust.

Not being in any position to further alienate Mama, Georgia turned the brunt of her anger against Walt. Since Richard had chosen to let his father live with him, Georgia included him in her wrath. Brenda had always been close to Georgia, but she couldn't bring herself to turn on her father and brother.

Walt and Richard, using Richard's remaining inheritance from Uncle Bunny, continued trading grain futures. In the beginning, they even had a few nice gains. Enough gains to convince Richard that his father knew what he was talking about.

Two months later, Richard too was broke, and began selling off the purchases he'd made when he first came into his money. The big truck, with those grossly oversized tires, was the last to go.

In the divorce, Georgia had gotten the house, paying cash for Walt's share of their equity. Walt moved out of the house, and went to live in Richard's apartment. All of these events had taken place between late spring and Christmas, starting from the time that Mama set up the trust to give Georgia the three million dollars. The last thing I wanted was to have Brenda upset like she was, in the early stages of her pregnancy.

Brenda came to me again, while we were staying in Ridgeline, very upset at the way things were progressing with her family. Her brother had called, asking her for a loan, and her mother had somehow gotten wind of it, spending over an hour with Brenda, telling her not to help either Richard or her father. Brenda wanted my advice.

What complicated things even more, was that Brenda's money had grown rapidly through the trading program I was using. Even after accounting for taxes on the gain, she was still up over sixty percent on the money I'd originally given her. She could afford to be generous with her family, if she chose to be. If she helped her father or brother though, Georgia was going to be very angry with her.

"How much did Richard ask to borrow?" I couldn't imagine him asking for that much, given the relationship he'd had with his sister for the past three or four years.

"He asked me for ten thousand, but he said he'd understand if I only lent him a couple of thousand. He's looking for work, and so is my dad. They've stopped trading grains now. Richard needs a car to get back and forth from whatever work he finds. They are behind on their rent. I'm going to let him have some money, at least enough to get caught up with his rent, and for him to buy a used car. My mother is going to be screaming at me some more, but he's still my brother."

"Look, you don't need to get in the middle of all this. It would be easier with your mother, if it was either me or Mama that decided to help him. I'll hire him to help out Aunt Clara and Bea with their deliveries. I'll buy him another truck if he agrees to do it. We'll take the payments out of his pay every month. This way, your mother will just be mad at me. I'll loan him whatever he needs to get caught up with things, and he can start paying me back from when he gets his first pay day. I don't want you worrying while you're pregnant, and I'll have Mama talk to your mother about upsetting you again."

She'll know you're only doing it for me. She'll still blame me. She just wants to hurt both of them."

"Brenda, she'll be right if she thinks that, because that's the only reason why I would do it. I love you, and I don't like seeing you upset by this thing between your parents. I don't like your brother, but I don't need to like him to do this for you. Bea will keep him in line, and we really do need to get them some help with all their deliveries."

Brenda was moved by me telling her I loved her and that I was doing it for her. She seemed more concerned with how I felt about her, now that she was carrying my child. She was unsure about her place in my affections, even though I'd done what I could to reassure her on that score.

"I'm still worried about what my father is going to do. Richard says he's really depressed now, drinking everyday, and not even trying that hard to find work for himself. I think he's given up."

"I'll find something for him to do too. If he still likes to fish, we can get him a little bait and tackle shop over at one of the lakes. They don't cost that much. He knows a lot about fishing, according to what everyone says. It might do him good to get away from here for awhile. His pride has taken a big hit these last seven or eight months. Maybe he should go somewhere new and start over."

Mostly, I was just winging it. I really didn't have any reason to believe that Walt would even give me a chance to help him. We hadn't gotten along well, almost since the beginning. If he wanted to be too proud to accept my help, perhaps I could take care of it through Richard. I had no doubt at all that Richard would grab at any life preserver thrown his way.

This conversation with Brenda had gotten me thinking about things. Joyce and I were being remarried in our big church wedding. All the X's were bridesmaids, and, as it got closer, I began to notice that they all started acting different around both Joyce and me. We didn't know that Joyce was pregnant again yet, but we had found out about Shirley, Brenda and Emily already.

I already felt a little funny about having gotten all the X's pregnant. It wasn't really an accident, especially in Brenda's case, but it hadn't been something I'd thought through enough as to how it would complicate all of our relationships.

What I was seeing, as the date for the wedding approached, was three girls who felt bad because they wanted to be the bride and not just the bridesmaids. What I was feeling for them, as each one turned up pregnant, was more than it had been when they were just a group of my ex-girl friends.

That night I spoke to Joyce about Brenda's problems, and then about my feelings about the changing attitudes of all the X's. I told her I was getting worried, because it was a much greater commitment after you had fathered a child with a woman. I was feeling a much stronger bond with each of them already.

I thought Joyce would be angry with me, or, at least upset, and a little bit afraid that this would somehow weaken our relationship. She surprised me.

"Kenny, that's what I wanted. The only way to make this work well for all of us, is if we're all equals. Having these babies will do this for us. We should find some way to bring all of us together, like you and I are right now. Maybe not a regular marriage, but some sort of ceremony with all of us. I've always thought of the X's as your other wives."

"You can only have one wife, Joyce. You're the one that's stuck with being it. We can all sit down and talk about other things. I'm not opposed to having a ceremony of some sort, but I don't think we should refer to it as a marriage."

"They can still be treated like they are your wives, without you needing to be married to them. You need to spend time alone with each of them, and let them know that you consider each of them to be your wives too."

"Joyce, I don't see how that would help the situation. A lot of the problem is with them wanting what you already have. It's probably the worst for Shirley, because this is her second time for having a baby without having a husband. Emily's parents are pretty upset about her being pregnant too."

"Kenny, I talk to all of them everyday. Don't you think we've talked about this? The X's all wanted to have babies with you. They knew we were married. You love them, and they already knew they loved you. None of this was an accident, they all made their own choices. They want to live with us, to be our family. In a way, we're all married already. I don't expect anymore from you than what you can give to each of them. I'm not jealous of any of them anymore."

I still went to sleep that night troubled. I was beginning to understand just how complex things were when you had four women you loved. Even when everyone was getting along well together, there were constant ripples in the pond we were all trying to swim together in.

Bea and Aunt Clara were doing a great job giving away groceries. I made it a point not to meet with them both at the same time. I met with Aunt Clara first, telling her I was hiring Richard to make the deliveries for them, so they could concentrate on getting better deals on the food they were buying.

I later told Bea that Richard would need to be watched, to make sure he delivered the food to the right people, and that he didn't try to extract any payment from any of the recipients. I also told her that I was expecting an audit soon, and she had to make sure all the paperwork was in perfect order, in case they came by to check on it.

Aunt Clara and Bea had resumed their personal relationship, and were meeting every evening over at Bea's apartment. Bea was telling me what a pain in the ass Mildred was being about everything, and that she seemed determined to make Aunt Clara's life miserable because of her spending time with Bea. I told her I'd try to find a way to put a stop to that.

I went to see Richard at his apartment. It was a pretty nice place, fancier than Bea's was. When he opened the door and saw me, he was immediately on his guard.

"Relax, Richard. I spoke with Brenda, and I came over and see if you might be interested in doing some work for me." I had stood back when I spoke to him. Given our past history, I couldn't quite bring myself to feel confident that he wouldn't try to attack me.

"Did she send any money? She said she'd help me. The rent is due again in less than a week, and I still haven't paid for last month. She didn't send any, did she?" Already, Richard was turning sullen and defeated.

"I have enough on me to help get the rent caught up. Brenda said you needed another truck or a car to get to work. This job I have, you'd need a truck, because you'd be making food deliveries to people."

"I sold my truck in November. My dad still has his car. He lets me use it if he isn't using it himself."

"I'd get you a truck, Richard. You could make payments out of your pay."

"What kind of food deliveries? Not pizza?" He looked worried about having to deliver pizzas to his friends. "How much would it pay?" His expression wasn't too optimistic. I actually felt a little bit sorry for him. He had gone broke trying to help his father. He had sold off all his possessions trying to keep things going until they both landed some work. In a sense, he showed a lot more loyalty to his father than I would have thought him capable of.

"It is a charitable foundation, and we donate groceries to people with children. All you need to do is make about twenty deliveries a day, with a couple bags of groceries being dropped off at each stop you make. I'll pay you fifteen hundred dollars a month, and give you mileage for the use of your truck." I knew fifteen hundred was a lot more than Richard was hoping to earn with the kinds of jobs he'd been looking for. "We also offer full medical and dental coverage, and two weeks off, with pay, a year."

"Really? Is there a retirement plan?" Richard was smiling. I hadn't seen him smiling since the time he'd kicked me in the forehead.

"There isn't yet, but I guess it's something for me to consider. You'll be working for my Aunt Clara and Bea. You remember Bea, right?"

"Sure, I remember her. Weren't you and Mr. Parsons both doing her? That's what my mother said."

"Either one will have the option of firing you, Richard. Those are the kinds of stupid questions that might lead to that happening, too. Bea was my mother's companion. She's a family friend. I don't think it would be a good way for you to start out what would be a very short career, by asking her those kinds of questions."

"I was asking you, and I didn't mean anything bad by it. You take everything I say to you and turn it into some kind of an insult."

"Richard, let's not play the poor, misunderstood, victim. I came here today to help you. For Brenda's sake. I figured if I did it, instead of her, your mother might not make such a fuss with her. Same thing goes for your father. I was thinking of becoming a silent partner, with him, in a bait and tackle shop over by the Delaware River, or Perry Lake."

"He'd rather have a small boat rental concession over on the Republican River. There's this guy he knows who was selling the last twelve years of his concession, and all his boats and rafts. My dad said that would be an easy way to make a living, if he just had the money."

"How much did the guy want for it?"

"About fifteen thousand for the lease, and another twenty five or so for the boats and rafts. He only has eight to fourteen foot skiffs, but he's really busy in the summer. Dad said he could fix those boats up with some caulk and paint, and make them look decent again."

"Why didn't the two of you buy it when you had the money?"

"Because we didn't need to look for a way to make a living when we had money. I guess we didn't plan ahead too good." Richard's voice tapered off when he said that to me. I could tell he'd been giving things like that a lot of thought, now that he was broke again. I wasn't interested in making him feel worse. I just wanted to get the situation taken care of, then move on to the next one.

"So, do you want that delivery job?"

"Would I have to kiss your ass if I took it?" That sentence, in a nutshell, described the relationship Richard and I had developed with each other. As badly as he needed help, he still had to come out and say something like that. I had no doubt that he'd refuse my offer if I told him something equally smart ass. A year before, I would have, and that would have closed off the easiest avenue to getting this problem solved for Brenda.

"No. I love your sister, and she's worried about you and your father, because she loves you both. All I'm doing is trying to get her to quit worrying about you two. I don't want to have more problems with you Richard. We're both too old to keep on with all that. Take the job until you find something else you'd rather be doing. At the very least, it will give you time to look around for something better, without worrying about being evicted or anything."