Chapter 5

Though it was no later than 4 p.m, not a ray of light could be seen in Sophia's bedroom. There were dark, heavy blankets covering the window and the door was shut. Even though the computer was on, its monitor was shut off. Sophia herself was sprawled across her bed, staring up at the ceiling that she couldn't see. There were times in her life that she found the darkness to be suffocating. Now, however, it served as a private, timeless haven. The absence of light felt pure because nothing contrary to that feeling could be revealed.

There were only two sounds that could be heard in the room; the first was the depressing rock music that emanated from the speakers of her computer. The second was coming from Sophia herself. Though her eyes had long since run dry of tears, the occasional dry sob leapt from her throat. Were there light, one would surely notice the wet streams on her face where the tears had fallen only moments before. She made no attempt to stop the crying and no resolve to control her emotions. Indeed, she barely even noticed when a sob escaped from her lips. Her mind was far too occupied with embracing the nothingness that surrounded her. The blackness allowed her to feel completely numb, which was all that she wanted.

The only thing that had the potential to distract her was the melancholic songs serenading her. It had served its purpose in enhancing the atmosphere, but now it was corrupting the purity of the haven, forcing her to think about the lyrics. Just as she found the strength to sit up, a ringing coming from beside her made her jump with surprise. The rapid flashing light that matched the pattern of the ring reminded her that she had set her phone next to her head in foolish hopes that her ex-boyfriend would call. Yet, perhaps she was not so foolish after all.

"Hello?" She answered, unsuccessfully forcing her voice to sound as though it wasn't hoarse from crying continuously for the past two hours.

""Hey sweetheart," came a female voice from the phone. It was Amelia.

Sophia froze. She had not expected a call from one of the girls.

"Hello?" Amelia said after a moment of silence.

"What do you want?" Sophia said as matter-of-factly as she could.

"You know, your attempt to sound cold only make you sound more cute."

"Fuck you," Sophia said calmly, without a hint of anger in her voice.

"What's your problem?" Amelia said, offended.

"What's my problem? I'll tell what my problem is," Sophia retorted while staring into the nothingness in front of her, "That little stunt you pulled cost me my boyfriend. He never wants to see me again. Or either of you."

"What the fuck? Just cos he passed out at a -"

"I told him."

"You... told him."

"Yes."

"You stupid fuck. What's wrong with you? What did you think would happen if you told him?"

"Maybe..." Sophia paused to mask the tears that were coming back to her now, "maybe relationships mean something to you and little miss whore-toy, but to me they're based on trust." She held her hand over the receiver after saying this to hide the sound of the sobs.

"Trust? What makes you think that just because Estelle and I have a healthy sex life that there isn't any trust involved? That's a hell of an assumption for you to make. And by the way, are we keeping score, because I have a friend who says that your boyfriend and her had -"

"It was only one time!" Sophia yelled before she could stop herself. She added, more calmly, "It was a mistake. He swore he'd never do it again."

"Yeah, well he lied."

Amelia must have known that this statement would cause an extended pause because she made no attempt to break the silence. Sophia's mind tried to process the motive behind this statement. She knew that if she could convince herself that Amelia was lying then she wouldn't have to feel its effects.

"Why would you say that?" Sophia said, returning to her matter-of-fact voice.

"Because it's true."