Chapter 10: Confessions and Revelations with Ice Cream

"And then I see a darkness
Oh no, I see a darkness
Do you know how much I love you
Cause I'm hoping some day soon
You'll save me from this darkness"

- I see a darkness (Will Oldman as Bonnie "Prince" Billy)

It was Sunday and even though we all woke up reasonably early, at least for what we had done the night before, we ended up cuddling in bed until noon. We would probably have stayed in bed and cuddled or had even more sex if not Sandra's mobile phone had not rung. Apparently, there was a problem with one of the security systems her company had installed and her presence was required. She dressed quickly, kissed us good-bye and left the apartment in a real hurry.

Without Sandra, Jessica and I decided to get up and get something to eat. Since neither felt like cooking, we decided to order some pizza. I've never been a lazy person and really enjoyed cooking so I hardly ever ordered any food. Ordering take-out pizzas at noon on a Sunday made me feel decadent.

"I'm not all that hungry. Perhaps we could share a large one. What kind of pizza would you like?" I asked her while looking at the menu from Paradise Pizza.

"You decide. My preferences do no matter. Remember that I'm allergic to nuts though."

"Jessica. We have been over this before. Tell me what you really want."

"I really want whatever you want me to eat."

"Ok. Suit yourself, but I am not ordering you to eat it. If you don't like it, you don't have to eat it," I answered. Since I was concerned by Jessica's lack of free will I decided to provoke a reaction. A reaction that would make her acknowledge that she had a free will.

I picked up the phone and called the pizza place. I ordered a large pizza with salami, loads of olives and extra cheese. I knew that Jessica hated olives. She once went ballistic in the office when someone handed her a lunch sandwich with olives on it. I had been careful not to order her to eat it and there was no way that she would eat them. She would remove the olives before she ate and I could prove my point to her.

We were really going all out on our decadency so we only put on robes instead of bothering with dressing. When the pizza arrived, I ordered Jessica to get it and pay for it. She happily did so. I was not a dominant personality and it was hard to order her around, but I had to remember to do it. She would be very unhappy, otherwise.

Jessica smiled when she came back carrying the pizza. Her robe had opened up a bit and one could almost see her nipples.

"My robe opened up a bit by itself and I think the delivery boy noticed since his eyes popped out. He was so distracted that he almost forgot to take my money," Jessica said giggling.

"I bet pizza delivery will be faster next time," I said as I thought about how much Jessica had changed. The Jessica from three days ago would have made sure the delivery boy would lose his job because he stared at her breasts. Today she had instead taken it as something to joke about.

Jessica smiled at my comment, put the pizza on the kitchen table and said, "After what he saw, it better be."

We sat down and I split the pizza in two. I lifted half of it to her plate and the other one to mine. It looked really delicious and it was filled with black olives as I had ordered. This was it. This was when I could prove that even though she pretended not to have one, she had a free will. There was no way a little brainwash could force her to eat olives.

I watched Jessica closely as she cut a slice of the pizza and started eating it. She had not removed the olives, she just ate it. The worst thing was that she seemed to like it. I was baffled.

"I thought you hated olives."

"I did."

"Then why are you eating them?"

"You seem to like them and that is all the reason I need."

Her words truly scared me. Her brainwash must be a lot stronger than I had imagined. She was changing into different person right before my eyes. A person formed by my desires and it scared the hell out of me. Not wanting to think about it more I started to eat some pizza myself. Noticing the awkward silence I decided to change the subject.

"We should buy a bigger bed. Sleeping was very intimate but a bit too crowded. Three really is a crowd in that bed."

"I don't think that will be necessary. I was thinking that we should all move to the villa. It is much larger and we wouldn't make the neighbours sleepless."

"What about your mission? You said you couldn't leave the apartment," I said in shock.

"The mission ended yesterday so I'm once again back in control of myself."

"Then why are you still acting like my personal slave?"

"That's a tough one. Simply to say, I did not like the old Jessica very much. When you ordered me around, I found out I liked being docile and submissive. I guess I want to be the new loving Jessica, a Jessica that is willing to do anything to please you and Sandra."

Not believing what she had told me I said, "Are you certain that you still aren't under some kind of control?"

"Positive."

"Can you tell me about your mission or are you still prohibited to do so?"

"There is nothing keeping me from telling you about it, except my own embarrassment. Originally, I had hoped that I would never have to tell you this, but as it is now I guess it is unavoidable. The only thing is that I don't even know where to start."

"Try the beginning. That is usually a good starting point."

"Well I need to think for a few moments. Let me get the ice-cream desserts from yesterday so we can enjoy them as we talk."

I simply nodded and Jessica fetched two gigantic bowls of ice cream and various fruits covered in dark chocolate. It truly looked delicious and I could not keep myself from digging in on it.

"Well this will be a long story, but I guess I should tell you everything. You know about the rape. Ever since the rape, I have been going to this counsellor to help me get over it. Four weeks ago, my old counsellor died in an accident and I got a new one, a woman. She is very bright and almost immediately taught me something that I had not known about myself. I was terrified of losing control, especially to a man. This fear led me to try and dominate every person in my surrounding. She suggested that the only way to get over this was to face my fear. To give up control to someone completely, preferably a man. She also taught me this technique called autohypnosis in order to let me control my own fear. A technique I quickly found myself very proficient with."

Jessica paused for a while to eat some dessert and I was beginning to suspect part of what had happened, but I was still confused how things ended up this way. My speculations were interrupted by Jessica's voice, "I was planning to give up control to Sandra sometime this week, but something happened last Thursday. It was shortly after I had yelled at you at the office. I had been angry because you at first didn't want to come in over the weekend and I was thinking on how to punish you for your insolence. It was late and I was about to head home, but I had to go into the ladies room. When I was there, I heard Carla and Linda gossiping. At first, I didn't pay attention but after a while, I understood that they were talking about you. They were talking about how you had been so upset that you almost cried when you had left my office. I also found out how badly I treated you and everyone else in the office. I felt guilty. I just sat there for a while and cried. I decided to drive over to your place and apologise, but you weren't home yet. It was then I realised that an apology would not fix everything that I had said to you over the last year; it had to be something else. A plan formed and I left a letter in your mailbox. I don't know if you got it or not but it was something to ease the pain I had inflicted."

"I got the note. I simply forgot about it when you showed up naked."

Jessica smiled at my comment and continued, "Well, anyways. I went home and decided to use my hypnotic skills to hypnotise myself. I had no idea of how well it would work out but it was worth a shot. Outside your apartment I had decided that I needed to be punished by you. I would throw myself at your mercy, I would in fact be your slave. Since I also wanted this to be some kind of therapy, I decided that I should remain your slave until you had done something sexual with me. Thinking that you were a man and that I had a pretty hot body, it would definitely not take long before you took advantage of me. To be certain to get it over with quickly, I ordered myself to show up naked. I also gave myself some other orders so I could not back out of it. Since I did not want to face you at work after all of this were finished, I took out three weeks of leave. The rest of the story you know."

I just sat there engrossed with what she had told me. The culprit that had made her do all this was actually herself. She had done it to punish herself and in some attempt to overcome her past. In some kind of twisted way it actually understood why she had done.