Chapter 48

We took our leave of the aunts and Joanne and walked back to the motel, arms around each other as we used to. We didn't talk, just walked, her head on my shoulder. I missed Riekie; she should be on my other arm, making me feel like the king of the world.

The three rooms that Bob had reserved were in a row. We selected the middle one, for personal and public reasons -- the noise -- which turned out to be mine. When he reserved them, with typical Bob thoroughness, he had deliberately put me between Carol and her father. I stopped at the desk and made sure I had all three keys, and informed them Mr. Scott would not be using his room that night, but we would keep it for our privacy. I didn't want that old pervert coming back. Carol didn't see the rental car, so we assumed he was gone.

The phone was ringing when we entered the room. I picked it up and heard Diane on the other end. She was very excited and started talking all in a rush. I couldn't get a word in edgewise except to answer questions in the affirmative or negative.

"David? Is Carol with you?"

"Yes, but..."

"Good, I want to talk to her after. I tried to get you at the aunts' but you'd already left. Has she asked you to make a baby yet?"

"Yes, but..."

"Good. After she called today, I found her last letter..."

I did interrupt. "Letter? What letter?"

"Don't interrupt! Ask her, she'll tell you! Where was I? Oh yeah, between it and the phone call, I was getting pretty confused. Then Mom called from Montreal all excited! She spooked me right out! She said she had Seen something, something important and GOOD and wanted to know what was going on. The only thing I knew of was Carol's request — I'm still not sure why I said it was OK. I told her Carol wanted you to make a baby with her. I thought Mom'd be pissed at such a strange request, but she was ECSTATIC, and yelled it out to Dad and Val as if that was the greatest news in the world! David? They cheered!

"I told her I agreed to Carol's request, but I wasn't sure I liked the idea of sharing my husband with another woman, especially to make a baby, and she said. 'Don't be silly, Child. She's been sharing him with you for eight years, now she's just getting what is rightfully hers.' David, she said it with so much conviction, I believed her, but I don't understand it for a minute.

"Mom said what she'd Seen was something like that, but wasn't sure until I told her. She said you MUST do it, but Carol might have her timing off. Mom said you two must definitely try on Sunday, something about the moon and the Goddess and all that mumbo jumbo. I told her you were coming home Sunday, and she made me promise to call your work to book another day of annual leave. She was really being spooky, so I agreed. I did it, and now you don't have to be back to work until Tuesday. You're supposed to try as many times a possible to make this thing happen. Mom was very clear on that, and she made me promise to tell you. I should be mad, but somehow I'm not. Something told me it was the right thing to do. When I got off the phone with her, I felt completely wrung out, but I did like she asked, and called your work.

"Then something really, really spooky happened, that makes me wonder if we haven't all gone crazy. Rhiannon came home from Heather's where she was playing with Donny, and asked. 'Is Daddy making me and Jenny a baby brother with our other Mommy tonight?'

"I didn't know what to tell her, and wondered where she got that idea, and what was this about her 'other Mommy'? I didn't leave Carol's letter out for her to read, and she was at Heather's when I talked to Mom. I was really shaken up, as you can imagine! I asked her, 'What makes you ask, Honey?"

"Rhiannon said, 'I Saw it in a dream while I was playing with Donny. If he is, he shouldn't come home until Monday, because they have to do it right, the Goddess says so.' I didn't know what to make of that. I know Mom goes on about the Goddess, but now Rhiannon? And out of the blue? That child is only six and a half years old, but today her eyes looked positively ancient, like she knew things and could actually See things.

"Anyway, David that's the strange thing that's been happening here. What did Mom mean when she said Carol had been sharing you with me for eight years? That's how long we've been married."

I didn't know what to say — to tell her the whole story of the last twenty years in a few minutes over the phone wasn't a really viable option, especially when she was about to find out I hadn't told her everything about Carol, except that what we'd had, had been very, very special. And Diane knew about Riekie only as a special friend. This would be complicated. I tried to demur.

"It's a long story, Honey, too long for this, and I think I should be with you when I tell it, Mom and Dad, too, and Rhiannon, now, I guess. Can you wait until I get home? Will you trust me on this?"

"OK, I guess. It's funny... when I asked Mom what was going on here, she said the same thing: to trust you and wait until you got home for answers, but I'm scared, David that I'll lose you over this. Do you still love me?"

I had an epiphany, and the Power seemed to grow stronger. I hadn't had a real one in years and years, and I relished the sensation, realizing I had missed this. When I was with My Girls, I had them all the time, so much so I sometimes questioned my sanity. I realized a corollary to the 'Cosmic Moment' I'd had on Riekie's wedding day: It was possible to love not just two people at once, but three, and probably more, with equal intensity. An infinite soul has infinite capacity for love.

"Diane Marie Lloyd! I love you more than you can imagine! That is gold you can take to the bank. I'll tell you one grain of truth that you can hold and examine until I get home. It might make you uncomfortable and frightened until I see you, but you must know this: I love you with everything I have, no reserve, nothing held back. I also love Carol Anne Scott with everything I have, no reserve, and nothing held back..."

Somebody tapped me on the arm and shook her head. I went back to Diane.

"Hold on a sec, Carol Anne is telling me something." I put my hand over the mike.

Carol said. "Tell her my right name."

"Your right name? I thought I just did."

"No, my right name is Carol Anne Lloyd. I changed it legally years ago. When I was sure we wouldn't be able to get back together, I wanted something of you, so I took your name, and it helped ease the pain of what I thought that man did to me. By changing it, I wasn't reminded of him every time I had to say or write my name, but was reminded of the good we once had. At first, it reminded me of our pain, but the reason for changing it was to remember the good, and it really helped — therapeutic, I guess is the word."

I wasn't sure how Diane would take this, and wasn't sure of my own reaction.

'Oh."

I uncovered the mike and spoke to Diane.

"Diane? Sorry 'bout that. I was just informed that Carol Anne's name is NOT Carol Anne Scott, but Carol Anne Lloyd. Whatever her name is, I love her completely, as I do you, and have loved her for twenty years. Can you handle that?"

"David, that's a pretty tall order, but as long as you love ME that'll hafta do until you get home. That was another thing Mom said. She said, and I quote her because it sounded so strange when she said it, 'Be prepared for a monumental love that is shared several ways.' It sounded so mysterious, and somehow grand, but now maybe I understand her words a little better. I'm so confused right now I don't know what to think. I should get off here now, I imagine you two have a lot of catching up to do, and I still want to talk to Carol. Is there anything else you have to tell me?"

"A couple things. First, next time you're talking to Mom, and I'll bet it could be as early as again tonight, tell her she must start Rhiannon's training as soon as possible. Tell her she has the Sight, and it is powerful. That's really important. Mom will understand without a lot of explanation. You should also ask her to start yours, too. If you felt what we're doing is right, then you have it to some degree as well.

"Finally, if you're feeling lonely or scared by what's happening right now, take the girls to bed with you tonight and every night until I get home. There's nothing more soothing than the unconditional love of a child when you're hurting or scared, and Rhiannon's special sensitivity we call the Sight could be helpful. OK?"

"I thought I'd sleep with them tonight anyway. Thank you, David. Can I talk to Carol now?"

"Here she is."

Carol took the phone. I didn't listen in, so only heard her side.

"Hello? Diane?

"Yes, I'm sure.

"Yes I do, <A world of warmth in those words> for twenty years. When he tells you the whole story, you'll understand.

"Sunday? < Incredulous> Is that what Mom said?

"OK! Thanks for telling me! <Excited> I'll hafta rebook my flight!

"Oh, I wish I could! <regretfully> I'm dying to meet you, but I've taken too much time off work now, <giggle> 'specially with taking Monday now, too!

"No, I didn't tell him. I thought you were going to.

"Oh! I see! That's Ok. I'll tell him myself. <giggle> Something tells me that's the way it was supposed to be.

"A boy? <mouth open in surprise> How do you know that?

"She sounds like a very special child.

"Give my sister Heather a hug for me, too. <sigh, wistfully> It's been too long since I was home, but I don't know when I'll get there.

"OK. Give my love to Mom and Dad and Val.

"Ok, Diane Marie, and thank you from both Ben and me. Did you want to talk to David some more?... OK, here he is, and thanks again, By-eee!"

Carol handed me the phone and mouthed a kiss at me. Then she pantomimed she was going to get her bags from the other room.

"Hello? Diane?"

"David, she sounds so nice! I HAVE to meet her!"

"She's been through a lot. You two have a lot in common. I'd like nothing better than to get you together. I think you could help each other with your healing."

"You think? David, I'm beginning to put some things together, but I'll wait until you get home to hear your story. From just a few things Carol said, I know she knows more about your family than 'just' an old girl friend should. No, don't start explaining now. I'll be OK. I trust you, and strange as it may sound, I trust her. I just wanted to tell you I love you, David, before we hang up."

"I love you, Diane Marie, don't ever forget that."

"I love you, too David. Oh! I just love it when you call me Diane Marie! You've never done that before! And it sounded so sweet when Carol Anne used it too! I think I love her, too! Is that possible? So soon?"

"I'll explain the name thing as part of my whole story. Yes, it's not only possible I think in this case, it's probable, maybe even inevitable."

"Sounds even more mysterious. Gotta go! Jenny's starting to fuss. See you sometime Monday! I love you! And David? Make a baby! A brother for the girls! <giggle> Listen to me! A few minutes ago, I was questioning my decision to let you do it, now I'm cheering you on! What's come over me? Uh-oh! Jenny's really fussing now. Gotta go! Love you! Byee!"

"'Bye, Diane Marie. I love you, and we will."

We hung up together.

My mind was in a whirl! Something really strange was happening here! Not only had I felt the Power back in my life, it seemed to have taken things over completely, and was making psychic waves even Diane could sense! And Rhiannon! Mom had always suspected Diane was one of Hers, and now our daughter's ability almost proved it, for where else could it have come from?

I heard Carol's key in the door as she returned with her bags. She set them down and came to me for a kiss. We exchanged a warm tender kiss that almost wiped out twenty years of loneliness and pain. We still had a lot of ground to recover, but we were off to a good start, and Diane's almost unquestioning support was beyond price.

Carol's kiss was getting more demanding, and I felt my body responding. We broke from that wonderful kiss and stared into each others' eyes like we always used to.

Carol smiled and whispered. "I should change into something more comfortable."

I shook my head. "Not just yet, Sweetheart, we still have some things to talk about, and I want my wits about me. I have an idea what you mean by 'more comfortable', and I don't need that lovely distraction just yet. In a way, I guess I still have to talk to the Carol Anne who's been alienated for twenty years.

Carol looked uncertain and a little frightened, but I continued. These things had to be out in the open for all of us to heal.

"Carol Anne, I can't just pick up where we left off, much as I'd like to. I'd like nothing more than to turn back the clock to July 1, 1966 and turn my back on a certain bus, but that isn't possible. And while you've reminded me of a promise I made in all seriousness twenty years ago, I can't just turn that function on and off, either. I love you, and always have. I buried it for I don't know how many years, believing you lost to me forever. Today I got it back, but I also need to sort it all out, or at least start sorting it out. I had two missions this weekend: your mother's funeral, and to expose that man's perfidy. I never expected that exposing him would bring you back to me.

"So, I have questions. We have the entire weekend, and if need be, I'll take even more time off work to get through this."

"You make it sound so serious and you're scaring me that you won't make a baby with me."

"Never fear on that point, Love! It will definitely happen. Not only does Diane approve, her last words to me tonight were a direct order to make a brother for the girls. And Mom and Dad are, to use Diane's word, 'ecstatic'. I can't argue with those people. How does she know it'll be a boy?"

"Rhiannon told her."

'Oh, I'd forgotten that in the surprise of her call. Now, I have some questions for you. Diane mentioned she got a letter from you. I didn't see any letter, and I picked up the mail. The only thing in the mail today was a letter from her cousin."