Chapter 79

Marcus pushed the door open and carried his bag into the silent, empty house with a sigh. It wasn't supposed to have been like this. Hope's father had not been a great surprise, although, if anything, he'd been slightly more forgiving than expected.

Coming to Warwick to find that Shawna's mother didn't know anything had drained him more than he would have expected. Walking into his old house felt strange without someone there to welcome him. To give him permission, he realised.

Not just that, but the absence of noise made it even more clear that this wasn't home any more. Home was where Shawna and Hope were, but that was down the street now. In Stornoway it had been the same building, at least. It had been odd trying to get sleep without them, but he'd known they weren't far away.

He trudged up the stairs with his bags, stopping at the door to his old room. The bed was stripped down to a bare mattress. The walls had been repainted in a soft blue. In the corner, where his desk had once been, a three-quarters assembled crib waited the last few hand-made pieces.

"We weren't expecting you for a few days."

Marcus jumped in surprise at Ally's voice behind him. He turned to find her waiting with an amused smile and a handful of sheets.

"I didn't think you were in," he finally managed, taking the sheets from her.

"Obviously."

"Did you want the key back?"

He delved into his pocket for it, but she waved it away.

"Of course not. Why would we want that?"

"Well ... I don't live here any more, do I?"

"For now, no. After university you might again. This is still your room, you know." Marcus turned to stare at it again, obviously disbelieving.

"No, it's the baby's room."

"No, it's not. Nick's assembling the cot in here because I'm still decorating the nursery. Once that's finished he's going to set the desk up again.

"Even if he does, my room's in Glasgow."

"With a bigger bed in it, I understand," Ally said laughing, and Marcus managed to smile and blush at the same time.

"I was just thinking how it doesn't feel like home because Hope and Shawna aren't staying here."

"They aren't?" Ally's brow wrinkled and she took a step back. "Look, I'll go put the kettle on while you get your bags unpacked, and then you can tell me what's going on, if you'd like."

"Sure."

Unpacking his bags was deliberately uncomplicated. Within the suitcase he'd separated items into carrier bags which he quickly emptied into the relevant drawers. A few individual items and the previous day's laundry which went in the hamper in the bathroom on the way down the stairs, and he was in the kitchen by the time the kettle boiled.

"That was quick."

"It's unpacking. It's not like it takes much thought."

"No, I suppose not," Ally conceded, leaning back against the sink.

"How are you feeling?" Marcus asked, nodding towards her hands which were stroking over her stomach.

"It changes," she smiled, hugging herself. "I keep stopping to look in the mirror to see if I'm showing yet, but I don't know if I'll be happy or upset when I do. I'm paranoid about eating too much, or too little, or the wrong things.

"Mostly, though, I just feel alive. It's an incredible knowledge that there's a life growing inside me, even if I can't really feel it yet. I keep thinking it's kicking or pushing, but it's not big enough yet really. I'll know when it does."

"Do you know if it's a boy or a girl?"

"We don't know — and we don't want to know — but I'm figuring it's a boy," she said as she turned away to pour the water into the cups.

"Why?"

"Because girls never distracted me as much as this does. But, we're not supposed to be talking about me, or the baby. We're supposed to be talking about you," she said as she put his cup in front of him and settled into place on her own chair, "and why you're here and not at Shawna's house."

"She didn't tell her mum I was supposed to be staying. Or that Hope would be staying with us."

"Does Hope have anywhere to stay?"

"Yes, Shawna's mum has the spare room set up for her."

"Oh, not staying with you. I misunderstood."

"When I left, Shawna was in her room unpacking and Hope was going to introduce herself."

"And Shawna didn't tell her you were coming at all?"

"I'm not sure what she said. I think she said we were coming, but not that we were staying there. And not that we were with Hope now."

"And how is that?"

"Well, she didn't take it very well at all."

"No, Marcus..."

"What?"

"I meant, how is it with you and Shawna and Hope?"

"Oh. It's ... I walked in here and the place felt empty. I didn't realise you were here, but there was more to it than that. It didn't feel like home, not because I've moved out but because Hope and Shawna aren't here."

"That's so sweet."

"Sweet?"

"Don't go all manly on me and pretend like you don't think it's nice, too."

"I ... Maybe," he shrugged an acceptance. "But I wouldn't call it sweet."

"It is sweet."

"Maybe it is. I wouldn't call anything sweet."

Ally laughed. The doorbell rang and she started to get up.

"It's alright. I'll get it," Marcus said.

"Don't you start!" Ally pushed his shoulder, forcing him back into the seat. "It's bad enough having Nick treat me like an invalid. It's pregnancy, Marcus. It's happened before."

"I was actually thinking that I'd finished my coffee and you hadn't finished your tea yet," he pointed out.

"It'll cool while I'm walking," Ally mumbled sheepishly.

Shawna's mother watched the two girls depart her house with open-mouthed surprise. Shawna gave her a quick peck on the cheek, suppressing a smile, and linked her arm into Hope's as they stepped onto the path.

"What are you grinning at?" the smaller girl asked, as they pulled the gate closed.

"Just ... I think Mum's wondering when the pod-people replaced me." Shawna laughed, turning back to give a jaunty wave to the curtain that twitched shut.

"Because you're happy?"

"Because I'm up and about and human at seven in the morning. And happy," Shawna clarified.

"That's not that unusual."

"It is at home. Especially during the holidays."

"In that case, why don't you tell me why we're up and about and human at seven in the morning?"

"And happy," Shawna pointed out, disengaging her arm to spin around. "Don't forget the happy."

"Alright." Hope couldn't help but smile, grabbing Shawna's hand to bring her to a halt. "And happy. Why?"

"Unloading to my Mum felt good."

"Unloading? You mean honest to goodness actual talking. Telling her what's going on in your life? That sort of thing?"

"Yeah."

It seemed to take some of the wind out of Shawna's sails, and Hope squeezed her hand.

"It's good that you're talking. You're obviously happier with things in general."

"More like I've not fucked up so badly that I have to hide it from her."

"You could have," Hope pointed out. "Marcus and I aren't a situation many parents would accept, I don't think. Daddy didn't."

"But your Mum would have, wouldn't she?"

"Probably not, to be honest."

"You told your Dad she would."

"Well, I know. She'd have accepted it, after a while. She wouldn't have liked it, I don't think."

"Would she have been disappointed with you?"

"Maybe. No, actually, probably not. Daddy wasn't, really. Worried for me, but not disappointed."

"See. My mother is. Disappointed with you because you're a girl. With Marcus because although he's a guy he isn't the right guy. With me, because she just always is. I don't know what the hell she wants, but I'm not it."

"Maybe it isn't that you don't know what she wants," Hope suggested quietly, "but rather she doesn't know what she's got."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You don't talk to her. She doesn't seem to talk to you much, either. I'm not suggesting that this is a one-way thing, but she doesn't know where you're coming from. She doesn't know whether to commend things or despair of them because she doesn't know whether you're happy about them or not."

"It shouldn't matter. If she's got an opinion, give it."

"Don't you start on 'should' and 'shouldn't.' We get enough of that from Marcus."

"Speaking of whom," Shawna said and the spring seemed to return to her step, "hurry up or we'll be late."

"For what?"

"Marcus."

"Is he meeting us?"

"No, he's out on his run."

"OK. So he's not there, and we have to hurry to..."

"To be there waiting for him when he gets back."

"We could cook him breakfast!" Hope's smile spread, and Shawna had to check twice to see if she were joking.

"We could," she agreed after a moment's pause. "I was actually thinking of being laid out naked on his bed when he'd finished his shower, but if you want to cook I'll try not to take too long."

"Well..."

Hope flushed, but Shawna saw that there was as much excitement as embarrassment in it.

"And you're sure Ally and Nick will be alright with that?" Hope asked.

"Well, by now Nick is probably half-way to his first job of the day."

"What does he actually do? I never did ask Marcus."

"Gardening. Landscaping, mainly, but he also custom builds fences, pagodas, bandstands, that sort of thing. Half his time he spends doing work for the council in the parks, and the rest he goes to the big houses outside the city and rebuilds their lawns for them."

"Oh, that sounds cool. Will Marcus join him, do you think? To work, I mean?"

"Gardening is not Marcus' thing. He'd be happiest if his lawn were a paved one that didn't need mowing."

"Not green-fingered then?"

"I guess that particular genetic divergence should have tipped me off that Marcus was adopted, shouldn't it."

"Well, that and the fact that he doesn't look anything like Nick."

"Well, that's not saying much, is it? I mean, look at me and Lotty. Mum and I are both chunky red-heads. So's my dad by all accounts. Lotty's slim and dark-haired."

"You are not 'chunky, '" Hope argued, neatly avoiding the elephant in that room. "You're curvy. Voluptuous. I like that word. Voluptuous."

"Voluptuous. Wow, four whole syllables to say 'fat'."

"To say 'curvy'!" Hope snapped, nudging her ineffectually with a hip as they approached the door to Nick and Ally's house.

"Will Ally be up?"

Shawna stopped and peered at the house for a moment, her smile broadening a little.

"Let's not wake her. Come on."

Shawna led her round the corner to where a gnarled old elm rose up shading a bay window.

"Marcus' room is up there," she said pointing. She reached up to grasp the lowest branches of the tree.

"You want to break in?"

"Well, I've sort of got a standing invitation from Marcus. Have had since I was about thirteen."

"That's about the same age Daddy decided he wasn't happy about me going anywhere with boys, let alone into their room," Hope said chuckling and looking up at the tree. "I'm not really dressed for climbing trees, though."

Shawna, already pulling herself off the ground, eased back down to the floor.