Chapter 68

"Marcus?"

He turned to see Ally and Nick in the doorway and nodded them in with a wan smile.

"Didn't last long, did it?" he observed bitterly.

"Is it over?" Nick asked, sitting on the end of the bed, pulling Ally down onto his lap.

"Yeah, she's found someone else."

"She'd still be with you if you'd let her, from the looks she's giving you," Nick pointed out, and Marcus just nodded. "What's going on, then?"

Marcus struggled to explain for a moment, until Ally stepped in to help him through it.

"Hope's the other person."

"As in that Hope?" Nick pointed back toward the main room. "Oh, boy." He paused, contemplating that for a few moments. "You came back to our house for some space. You still need it?"

Ally tensed, Marcus saw.

"No, thanks. This is... You've taught me enough that I can find my own way. Besides, you've got a real family to take care of now."

"I figured she'd tell you." Nick turned to Ally with a warm smile, then back. "You are real family. You know that, don't you?"

"I am, but... It's different. You and Ally have been good to me. It's time for you to have your turn. You put off having your own children until I was out of the way —"

"Marcus, I never said that!" Ally cut in.

"I know. You'd never say it, but it's true. He said he had to make sure I was alright before he'd think about it, and you were prepared to wait for him."

Nick just looked away, ashamed, and Marcus leant over, hugging them both.

"You need space. You need to enjoy your time. You've given me everything I needed. It's my turn to give you something. I need to go and decide if I want to be an uncle or a brother."

"What?" Ally giggled, surprised at the show of affection.

"Nick's more like a Dad than anything, but... I'm sorry, Ally. I know you're his wife, but you're more like a big sister." She flushed at that, kissing his cheek, and he sat back.

"Just labels, Marcus." Nick told him. "Remember... you're just... ours. It doesn't have to have a biology, or a role, or a name. Just be you, and know that we care for you. There's no limit on caring, you know. You can always come back. It'll need rearrangements, but... More love around the house can only be good for junior." He rubbed his hand across Ally's belly, and Marcus nodded his appreciation of the offer, but they both knew he wasn't about to take it up. Ally, though, was gnawing gently at the edge of her cheek.

"Alright, Mr. Share-the-love. My turn." She pushed herself off Nick's lap and shoved him towards the door.

"What?"

"You wanted me to talk to him, right? Well, this is a big-sister, little-brother thing. Your ears'll catch fire if you listen to this." He was gone like a shot, and she turned as she closed the door behind him, focussing on Marcus. "Do you still care for Shawna?"

"I always have. I probably always will," he said, without even needing to think, continuing to fold t-shirts.

"What about Hope?"

"What about her?" he said, freezing.

"Do you care for Hope? Like that?"

"No. Hope and I have never been anything more than..." He shook his head. "We are friends — good friends. If Shawna hadn't been around, maybe, but she was." Ally nodded, seeing the guilt in his look, realising the truth hidden behind that.

"See, they kind of got off this easily." She pointed at the bag. "You're leaving, letting them get on with it."

"I think it hurt them, too," he acceded, after a moment's thought.

"I think you're probably right. What are you going to do?"

"Leave. Let them get on with it without me in the way."

"Is that what you want?"

"This is me, Ally," he said, not looking her way. "What I want has never been high on the list of what happens in the world."

"Maybe it should be."

She crossed the room to wrap her arms around him from behind, and he barely flinched at all.

"Maybe... The world doesn't seem to be listening."

"So shout. Fight. Make it listen. Shawna's special to you; fight for her."

"If... I haven't got anything to compete against Hope with. She turned away, Ally. She found someone else. If she wanted me she would have stayed."

"Do you think she loves you any less?" She turned him around. "Do you think Nick loves you any less now because I'm around?"

"You did, didn't you?" Marcus pointed out, quietly. "You thought he would love you more if I wasn't there."

"I thought he'd show it more without you. He doesn't. I know he loves me with everything he has, whether you're at home, or here, or wherever. He has more time for me when you're away, sure, but love? No."

"There's no limit on caring," Marcus recalled.

"There's no limit on loving, he means. He's cute when he's shy, but it would be so much easier sometimes if he said what he meant."

They fell silent for a moment, and she gently let go, stepping away from him towards the door.

"So, what was your flaming hot, ear-burning advice going to be?" he asked, turning back to the case on the bed.

"Done it." She smiled. "He'd get it, with all his 'no labels' stuff. Marcus. There's one thing you can say that will make this right."

"I can't just accept an apology, Ally. It... I...

"It can't go back to how it was. That's what an apology would be trying to do," she confirmed. "One thing... one person. They're all just labels, Marcus. Just make sure they're your labels." She eased the door open, and ushered him out.

"Hope?"

Mr. Nakata wasn't tall, but he towered over his daughter, and the crossed arms and deep frown just made him seem to loom taller over her.

"Alright." She slumped against the wall, and Briana was there like magic, a cup of tea and a supportive smile at the ready. "Thanks, Bri."

"Who was blackmailing you, Hope? What... what were they blackmailing you with? What for?"

She sipped the tea, seeking time for her answers, feeling the pressure building behind her eyes.

"Sex, Daddy. With sex, for sex. They... They had a video. Of me."

"Wh... how... Did they bring you to this?" He pointed across the room at Shawna and waved towards Marcus' room. "Him and that... that..."

"Slut." Shawna put in, not bothering to turn, as Nick emerged from the bedroom.

"Yes. Slut!" he snapped, turning to Hope. "Did they?"

"No, Daddy. I did this all on my own. All my own stupid fault."

"Well, it's... We'd have been upset, but... You can seek forgiveness for that, Pumpkin."

She smiled, then, looking over at him, knowing she was about to break his heart, while he was trying his very best to make it all better.

"Thank you, Daddy... really, but... You'd have been more than upset, Daddy. This video... it... I..."

"Who was this boy? He didn't force you, did he?"

"No, Daddy... The boy with the video, he probably would have, but Shawna stopped him. Shawna and Elspeth and Bri and some friends. And then Marcus, later..."

"They... oh..." He paled, looking over at Shawna who just shrugged, wiping at the tear-stains on her cheeks with a tissue as Lorraine helped her up off the floor.

"Well, who was he? Is he... did you..." he took a deep breath and calmed himself. "I'm trying not judge, pumpkin, but you aren't... This must be difficult for you."

"It wasn't a he, Daddy," she whispered.

"Wha... what?"

"The video... I wasn't with a boy. I was... with... with a girl." Her voice trailed off to a whisper, her shoulders hunching as she closed in herself, wincing even before he started.

"You... I... That is it. We didn't bring you up this way. It's this place. You're coming home right now."

"I was already packed."

"Hope..." Shawna whispered, moving closer, but Mr. Nakata stepped between them.

"YOU! You should be ashamed. You brought her to this."

"No she didn't." Hope said and pulled his hand down from where he was pointing at Shawna. "I... This is who I am, Daddy. You can take me home, but I'll be the same person. I... I like girls. I'm not ashamed of that... I'm ashamed of... today." She stared across at Shawna, and they both turned as Marcus emerged behind Ally, a wary, set look on his face, jaw clenched tight. "Very ashamed of what I did today."

"Oh, today is so different?" Her father didn't notice the comings and goings around him, focussing on her. "What perversion did you get up to today?"

"I slept with my best friend's girlfriend," she said clearly, back straight, but she looked straight at Marcus as she said it. "And I am so, so sorry."

"What sort of... Look, I don't agree with it, but at least they were lying together as man and woman, like God intended. Are you leaving, boy?" He demanded of Marcus, realising he was there, and then turned back before he could answer. "I don't understand where your mother and I went wrong, but..."

"Why are you sorry, Hope?" Nick said, cutting across him.

"It hurt two people I care about," she told him. "Hurt them more than I can ever make up for."

"Hurt them? Hurt yourself, hurt your mother, God rest her soul. It was a perversion!" Mr. Nakata interrupted, grabbing Hope's arm.

"Leave her alone," Marcus said stepping forward, glowering as he moved between them.

"It wasn't a perversion, Daddy," Hope told him, stepping alongside Marcus, refusing to hide behind him. "It... I hate how I did it, but it was wonderful. I've never been so certain that I loved someone in my life."

Shawna's crying got louder, and Marcus felt his heart tighten that he couldn't do anything about it, that he wasn't sure he wanted to. He wanted it to hurt, wanted her to feel bad enough to change her mind.

"Come on, Hope. You're not staying here any more. This place has twisted your mind. You can't stay here with these... these..." He grabbed her wrist again, and Marcus placed his hands on the man's arm, lifting it out the way.

"These what? Perverts? Freaks? Weirdos?" he snapped, pushing him back out of the way. "Shawna and Hope found love. Your God is supposed to like that." He held up his scabbed arm. "I've fought, bled for both of them, and I'd do it again.

"You're daughter isn't a freak, and she isn't a pervert. She's an incredible, warm, smart, funny woman.

"You don't want her to be happy because you have these little labels flying around in your head. Boxing people, compartmentalising them, shutting out anyone who doesn't fit into the roles you've defined."

"Young man, this is between my daughter and me." Mr. Nakata finally got over his shock to get a word in.

"No, it isn't." Marcus sagged as he gave up the last of his hope. "It's between Shawna and Hope. They don't accept your limit on 'man and woman like God intended.' There isn't a limit... on..." He trailed off, the anger suddenly gone, and as the silence gathered close. Ally giggled. "There... There isn't... There isn't a limit."

"Are you quite finished?" Mr. Nakata stepped round him, reaching for Hope's arm again, but Marcus' arm jutted out, taking her hand first.

"No... No, we're not finished," he said, swallowing hard. His face had shifted from the anger and loss of earlier to something else. Fear was there, Hope could see as he turned, but only Shawna recognised the hope. "Would you excuse us, for a moment," he muttered absently. Towing a compliant Hope behind him he turned to Shawna. "You wanted to talk?" She nodded, not trusting herself to speak. "Let's talk." He held out a hand for her.

"Use the kitchen," Elspeth said, stepping out of the way of the door. The only other option was Hope's bedroom, and that had all sorts of bad associations for them. Shawna hesitantly took his hand as he passed, squeezing it tightly as though she were afraid he was about to let go.

He led the way in. The girls followed him, and before Mr. Nakata could step in to follow them, Tony, Briana and Elspeth had placed themselves in front of the door and pulled it tightly shut.

Marcus moved hesitantly around the table, holding chairs for them both to sit without thinking about it. He hoisted himself up onto the counter, biting at his lip as he thought about where to start.

"Marcus," Hope whispered, and he looked up, not really hearing her. He looked at them both, and plunged in.

"I love you, Shawna. I have for... for years. You hurt me today, and not because you were with someone else — you've been with other people — because I thought it was just us, now."

She swallowed hard and nodded.

"And I thought, Hope, that you were our friend. I thought I saw something between you two, but... I'm Marcus. We all know I'm not good at reading those sorts of signs, so I ignored it, told myself I was wrong. But I wasn't wrong. I'm bad at reading people, but I can read you, Hope. You look at me — at us — like I do at Shawna, like Shawna looks at me.