Chapter 26

Friday morning, when I got to school, I started noticing the differences right away. People were generally friendlier to me, and two different girls in my accounting class actually came up to me to start conversations. After my real estate class let out a few minutes early, I was heading towards my car when a third girl approached me, asking my help with directions to a nearby camera shop. It was strange to be sought after, and nothing like that had happened to me before. I'm not sure what charisma is, but it draws people to you. It's almost like being rich in a way. I decided that I liked it, and that it would make my life better just like the voice had claimed.

When I got to Connie's house, she looked at me strangely, but didn't say anything right away. We were sitting in the restaurant, already having ordered before she said anything to me about it.

"There's something different about you, Jimmy, and I can't figure out what it is. It's like everything is still the same with you, but it seems different, better somehow. At first, I thought that you had gotten a tan, but that isn't it. Besides, it's February, where would you get a tan from?"

"I feel better now, maybe that's what it is. I hurt my back before, but now it's feeling better. Maybe I'm standing taller now because I don't feel the pain?"

Just then, our meals came, and we spent the next twenty minutes or so eating Mrs. Knott's fried chicken dinner together. Even though we weren't talking that much, every time I looked over at Connie, she was staring back at me. I felt like the last cookie in the bowl, with a houseful of hungry, screaming children around me.

"What time are we leaving tomorrow, Jimmy? I can't believe we're going to be together in a motel room like that. If anyone I knew found out about it, I'd just melt from the shame of it."

"I've been thinking about that too. Maybe it isn't such a good idea. If you're already that worried about it, perhaps we should try to come up with a different way to see if you've got control over your new emotions."

"Jimmy Gordon, I already agreed to do it, and I'm certainly not changing my mind now. I just meant that we needed to be careful, that's all. I want to be tested, so that I'll know, for sure. You even said yourself that we needed complete privacy to have a fair test. I was just being a little bit nervous, that's all it was."

"If you're sure, Connie. I've been a little worried that it might not be a fair test, just because it is so private. Normally, we'd never get the chance to be somewhere that private. I'm worried that it might affect the way that we act."

"I hadn't thought of it that way before. You mean that we might do more than we otherwise would, just because it was so private and we might never get another chance like that?"

"Like a prom date. Sometimes, girls get carried away by all of the expense involved, and the uniqueness of the experience, and go farther than they might have on just a regular date."

"You think this is like that? It would be unique, and it is expensive, I bet, but there is a lot more at stake with a prom, and all of your friends are there too. I don't think it's like a prom date. At the prom, all of your friends know what you're doing, or going to do. This is more private, a lot more private. It will be better than a prom date. What time did you say that you'd pick me up?"

"We can't check into our room until after eleven tomorrow morning. I'm going to go down and pay for the room, and get the key, around then. I could pick you up at noon or so."

"It would be silly to make two trips, Jimmy. Why don't you pick me up at around ten and we'll just drive there together to pick up the key? I don't mind doing that, really. In fact, I think it would be exciting being there with you when you pay for the room. I want to go with you then. Besides, doing it your way, it would be one o'clock before we got to the room and then we'd need to go out and eat something. We wouldn't even get started testing until almost three. I want to have enough time to make a complete test."

"Are you sure? It might be embarrassing for you to have the desk clerk see you, and then draw conclusions about what we were up to?"

"I'm sure. I don't give a fig either, for what some dirty minded clerk is thinking. I know what we're doing, and I'm comfortable with that. Let's go to the river, Jimmy, and work on those ground rules."

I paid for our meals and we drove back to Fullerton again. It was early when we got there, and we were the first car there. When we had the car parked and the radio playing our favorite music, we adjusted the seat as far back as it would go, and started kissing. On the drive over, Connie told me that she wanted us to do some kissing when we first got there, telling me that she had missed our time together, and that she wanted us to just relax and try to have a regular date too. I had already decided to really hold her off on this date, whetting her appetite for the following day's festivities. The more I fought her off, the more she pressed me. I finally had to pin her hands at her sides while we kissed, and even then, she started rubbing as much of her body against me as she could.

"Jimmy, let me go. We aren't going to start testing until tomorrow. Why don't you let me show you how much I've missed you tonight. I promise that I won't go past where we've already gone before."

"I'm not going to do that, Connie. I already told you that. Tonight, we can kiss all you want to, but I'm not going to let you touch me on my dick. I know that that's what you're trying to do, but you can't."

"I don't see why not. You let me before, and nothing bad happened. How am I ever going to know whether my emotions are under control if you never let me have any emotions?"

"I don't think it's your emotions that you're worried about here, Connie, I think you're just trying to get to rub my dick."

"Didn't you tell me that it was normal and natural to be interested in that kind of thing? Now you're being a hypocrite, Jimmy. If it's natural, then why not let me do it? Who's it going to hurt? You already said that you play with it almost everyday, and I almost never get a chance to play with one. It isn't fair. I'd let you play with mine if you wanted to."

"I want to play with yours too, a lot, but I'd be worried that if I ever did see it, and play with it, that my resistance would crumble, and I wouldn't be able to have the strength to stop us if we were going too far."

"Most guys would be happy to let me play with theirs."

"That's true, most guys would. I'm not most guys, Connie. I care about you. I don't want to see you taken advantage of like that. After I know that you have good control, I'll let you play with it everyday if you want to. First though, you have to show me that you do have control. Tomorrow, after you show me that you have control, I'll even get all undressed for you, and you can play with it until your eyes get crossed. Just not tonight. If I get undressed for you tomorrow, are you going to get undressed for me?"

"Really? I thought we were going to just test my emotional control, not get naked together. I hadn't thought about doing that."

"That's good then. We can skip that part. I was just trying to give you an incentive for being good tonight, anyway."

"So, you didn't mean it?"

"I meant it, but only because that's what I thought you'd want. It wouldn't be until after you showed control though. If we were both naked, there would be too much chance that something might get out of hand, in case both of us lost control at the same time."

"We'd both have to be very careful, that's for sure. Would you let me rub my body against yours if we were naked?"

"I don't know. It would depend on how much control I felt like I had. I got all naked with another girl once and she took advantage of me. I wouldn't want that to happen again."

"What did she do that took advantage?"

"It's embarrassing. I'm not sure I should tell you what she did."

"It can't hurt to talk about it, Jimmy. That way I can be sure not to make her mistake."

"All right. We were in her room, this girl and I. Her parents were gone out somewhere, and we were all alone in the house. We dared each other to get naked and then we looked at each other. Neither of us had ever seen someone of the other sex naked before. With a boy, everything is obvious, and right out in the open so you can see it. With a girl, it's not so open or obvious, so I complained that I couldn't really see that much."

"How old were you?"

"I was fifteen, and she had just turned sixteen. We were more friends than boyfriend and girlfriend. We hadn't ever kissed even before this day. Anyway, I was complaining, and I was laying on her bed so that she could inspect me. When she got done, she said that she had an idea of how I could get myself a good look. She got on the bed and sat down on my chest with her legs spread open. She opened her vagina up with her fingers, and then told me to look inside. There wasn't that much to see, and I got a good enough look pretty fast. She was getting heavy on me, and I asked her to get off, and told her that I'd seen enough.

Instead of getting off me though, she scooched forward and put her vagina right in my face. She had me trapped so that I couldn't get her off of me, and then she made me lick her, right between her legs. I did it, just to get it over with, and when she got off of me, I got dressed and ran home. She wasn't my friend anymore after that."

"Did that really happen? I can't believe that. I can't imagine what kind of girl would do something like that. How did she even think about doing that?"

"I don't know. She must have liked it though, because she kept coming over to my house asking me to come play with her again."

"Did you?"

"Not for a long time, but then I forgave her. I never trusted her after that though. She didn't have to trick me like that. If she had just asked me nice that first time, I might have done it for her. I've done it for other girls when they asked me to. It isn't the same as going all the way, but most girls like it better because they can't get pregnant from it."

"Did that girl that died, the one that you loved, did you do that with her?"

"All the time. She loved it. I told you that she was afraid of getting pregnant? I would do that to her for awhile, and she would have these tremendous climaxes, really strong ones. She said that it was better than anything she could do for herself, but after she had a few of those, she said that she needed me inside her. I always used a rubber though, because she didn't want to get pregnant."

"What I don't understand, Jimmy, is why you won't even let me play with your thing, when you already admit that you've done lots of things with other girls? What's wrong with me?"

"There's nothing wrong with you. It's just that I'm trying to be good now. Once you show a girl how you can lick them, that's all they want from you. I like talking, and going out and doing things."

"That was interesting, Jimmy, and it does explain some things about you that I've been wondering about. How did those other girls even know that you did that? I can't imagine how it would come up in normal conversation."

"Usually, it wasn't anything that we talked about beforehand. It was just something that kind of happened. We'd be kissing and making out and I'd be kissing their breasts or something, and then I might decide to kiss their bellies a little. I like kissing girl's belly buttons. Anyway, when you are kissing a girl's stomach, one or the other of you will think about what's right below and wonder how it would feel or taste. If a girl's already had that done to her before, she'll want you to do it to her. If she hasn't, well I usually start thinking about how much she'd like it, and then I start wondering how she will taste. One way or another, from there, it usually just happens."

"Is it considered normal making out, or is it considered going all the way?"

"You know, I've wondered about that myself. It isn't really just normal making out, because there are a lot of guys who won't do it to a girl like that. It isn't going all the way, because only intercourse is that. It's kind of between the two, like when a girl takes a guy in her mouth. It's more than making out, because he cums, but it's less than when he puts it inside her vagina. But, we're a long ways away from any of that. Right now we need to establish the rules that we'll use for the test. I think it should consist of five stages."

"Five stages?"

"Yes, the first stage would be just sitting together, to see whether you can just sit there and not do anything else. Now, I'm sure that you won't have any trouble with this one, so we'll make it a ten minute stage only.

The second stage will be both of us kissing. We'll kiss for a few minutes, say fifteen, and see if we can both resist doing any touching or feeling each other up.

The third stage will be harder, that's when we will kiss and do a little bit of fooling around. I'll touch your breasts, and let you do anything you want to above my belt line."

"That doesn't sound like a fair test. You get to play with me, but what do I play with?"

"That's in stage four, Connie. In stage four, I'll get undressed. Now, this is if you pass all of the other stages. We can kiss, and then you can touch wherever you want to, until I tell you to stop."

"How long is stage four going to be? As long as stage two?"

"No, not that long. I'll hold out until I feel myself starting to lose control, and then I'll ask you to stop. If you do stop, then we'll go on to the final stage."

"Which is?"

"In stage five, we'll both be undressed and I'll be kissing your breasts but you can't touch my dick or do anything else to me. After I'm done with kissing you, you can rub yourself all over me, but you can't touch me with your hands at all. I won't stop you from doing anything else until the time is up, as long as you don't try to use your hands."

"How much time? How long do I get?"

"Ten minutes. That's it, because any longer than that, and I might lose control myself. And, we can't begin stage five until after we've had a break from stage four, as long as it takes to get myself back under control."