Week Twenty Nine

BOWLING — THE STEPLADDER FINALS

Friday — The First Final — 10^th-The Mariners v 9^th-The Bulldogs

The first thing we — Camilla, Robert and I — noticed on arrival on Friday night was that extra temporary stands had been erected doubling the size of the crowd from two hundred to four hundred. The second thing we noticed once discussion of the match — Robert and I had both come to the conclusion that the Bulldogs would win a tight one — and the interviews with both teams were over was that pressure could, and did, make a difference to the standard of bowling. Just the thought of the extra money to be gained by moving one rung up the ladder when combined with the knowledge that defeat meant elimination from the competition was enough to make the one-two pocket for left-handed bowlers or the one-three for right-handers seem just that tiny bit smaller. And that's just how the first game played out.

In that first game an unusually high number of open frames — there were eleven — was the perfect illustration of how a finals atmosphere and four hundred noisy people, many of whom were scantily dressed, can affect any bowler. Now while there were five splits, all caused by hooking the ball too early, there were two single pin misses, both the five pin right in the centre of the deck and both missed by Eva Collis of the Bulldogs. The Mariners were a combined 81 pins below their team average with Allan Morris the only one making his average while the Bulldogs fared a fraction better being only 69 pins below average. The end result of that first game was that the Bulldogs won by 14 pins with three close individual wins giving them a 6 points to 1 lead.

Things improved marginally in the second game for both teams with the Mariners turning the tables for a close 5 to 2 win meaning that game three would decide which of the two teams would take on the Hawks tomorrow afternoon. The close game was a direct result of father Peter Jones and daughter Kim turning a combined 63 under average first game performance into a 49 over second game, a turnaround of 112 pins that was entirely responsible for the Mariner's 6 pin win.

The third game finally produced something near the sort of bowling both these teams were capable of. For the Mariners 15-year-old Anna Wilson opened with eight straight strikes spared the ninth and struck out for a 278 one short of her season best while 16-year-old Kim Jones struck in six of the first seven frames before three spares and a final ball 9 left her with a good but not great 233. And when you added Kim's father Peter's 11 strike and 9 spare 279, it could have been more than enough to make up for Allan Morris's disappointing 22 under average game. That it wasn't was due entirely to Evan Collis who picked an opportune time to bowl his third 300 of the season and his first since perfect games in rounds nine and ten. Oh he did have a little help, his wife Eva bowled a scratch 257 two pins short of her season high to get within two pins of Anna Wilson's handicap score while Alice Busby matched Anna's 278 to give the Bulldogs a convincing 60 pin win, an overall final result of 16 points to 8 and a clash in tomorrow afternoon's second stepladder final with the Hawks.

In the interviews the Bulldog team were happy to have made it to the second final while the Mariners were simply grateful to have made it to the top ten and happy enough to add the tenth place prize money to their week by week earnings. Then it was time to interview the two participants in the fuck fest; first up it was the Mariners Allan Morris who, being nude and minus nine, had an appointment with a tall and plump and big breasted blonde from the audience. As was often the case she was already naked by the time she was standing next to him and laughing while holding his cock in her right hand and encouraging him to play with her breasts.

I turned to Allan Morris and Eamon McMillan who, at nude and minus six, had Millie waiting for him to fuck her. "So, is this the upside of finishing nude and minus plenty?"

"It sure takes the edge off it," said Allan moving behind his blonde partner and tucking his hard-on between the cheeks of her fleshy arse while reaching around and taking a breast in each hand.

"And what about you Eamon," said Robert Miles, "not only do you get to move on to the second final you get to have sex with Camilla. How good is that?"

He didn't have to answer the broad smile told us all we needed to know. And in a matter of two or three minutes both Millie and the blonde were on their backs on side-by-side mattresses with their legs in the air while Eamon McMillan and Allan Morris knelt at their hips and drove their cocks in and down into warm, wet and welcoming pussies.

All in all while the first two games were less than exciting the last game and always entertaining sex show more than made up for it.

Saturday Afternoon — The Second Final — 9^th-The Bulldogs v 8^th-The Hawks

"So what do the two of you think will happen in this afternoon's match?" Camilla turned to her boyfriend Robert Miles. "Would you like to go first Robert?"

"Okay," he smiled, "my first thoughts are that both these teams are very evenly matched, both have two A-list bowlers and both have a bowler who falls a couple of average points below that. To my mind though it could very well the two lead off bowlers, Eva Collis for the Bulldogs and Millie Swan for the Hawks the supposed weak links, who might just hold the key to this match. Eva proved last night with that game three 257 just what she is capable of under pressure and Millie has a high game 268 and a high series 780 on record this season. Ultimately though I think the heavy scoring potential of Alice Busby and Evan Collis coupled with the current good form of Eva Collis should be enough to get the Bulldogs another win." Robert turned to me. "What do you think Justin?"

I looked from Robert to Millie before I turned to face the camera. "I couldn't agree more, and the fact that they were able to win with little or no input from their anchor bowler Eamon McMillan leads me to think that they have a second to none chance."

"So there you have it," said Camilla to the camera and our viewers, "our resident experts think that the Bulldogs will win the right to play in tonight's third final against the Kangaroos, stay tuned and see if they are right. Watch with us as we find out who will be the heroes and whose lack of success in the strike department will earn them a place in the sex show."

Starting with a two pin advantage courtesy of the handicaps the Bulldogs jumped out to an early lead in the first game that they would never relinquish thanks mainly to Evan Collis and Alice Busby's continued good form and an improvement from Eamon McMillan. Evan, after matching his direct opponent, fellow A-list bowler David Jefferson, strike for strike through the first six frames continued on right through to the end for his twenty-seventh successive strike — he rolled three in the last frame of his second game last night — and second successive 300 while Jefferson spared the seventh and tenth frames.

With Peter Craven's solid win over Eamon McMillan courtesy of a marvellous 278 and Millie Swan's win over Eva Collis cancelling out Evan Collis's big win the first game was ultimately decided by a season low game by Debra Mills of 169 that contained three open frames and only five strikes including just one double. When matched against Alice Busby's seven strike and four spare 245 Debra's ultimate seventy-two pin loss was enough to give the Bulldogs a 60 pin 5 points to 2 win and send Debra nude along with her teammate David Jefferson and the Bulldogs Eamon McMillan.

After discussing the game and just before the second game was due to start, Camilla posed both Robert and I a couple questions neither of us had thought of that certainly gave us cause for thought. "Did the fact that they played last night work to the Bulldogs advantage in this first game, will the Hawks be better with that game under their belts and will the winner of this afternoon's game have an even bigger advantage tonight against the Kangaroos?"

"Well on paper it certainly seems to be the case," said Robert, "I guess this afternoon's second and third games and tonight's first one might very well give us a further clue." He turned to me. "What do you say Justin?"

"I'd say that we both have different reasons to be curious. Next Friday night Robert, your team will have had two weeks off but you'll be playing the winner of final four after they've had a week off, for our team it'll be a different story next Saturday night, we'll be coming up against a team thoroughly warmed up after an afternoon of bowling and a short break to freshen up."

"Which," said Camilla, "should make this afternoon's remaining two games and tonight's match against the Kangaroos interesting in more ways than one." She looked out toward the lanes. "No time for more discussion though they are getting ready to bowl."

In game two the Hawks came out firing and took quick advantage of open first frames by Eva Collis and Eamon McMillan despite an open first frame by Millie Swan, and by the third frame they led by thirty four pins. At that point they looked some chance of winning and making inroads into the Bulldogs big lead, however a disastrous big four split — the four-seven-six-ten pins — to Millie Swan when she went straight through the head pin and picked up just one with her second ball for a seven count set the Hawks back on their heels. And when you added successive spares to Debra Mills and David Jefferson in the fifth and sixth frames and a split for Peter Craven that he failed to convert they were left with a thirty pin deficit from which they failed to recover.

Taking advantage of these lapses were Eamon McMillan who was in the middle of a six strike run, Evan Collis whose run of strikes was finally broken with a six spare in the third frame but most especially Alice Busby who took over where Evan left off by rolling her own 300 game.

The end result was that the Bulldogs matched their first game 5 to 2 first win, this time by 56 pins. This left the Hawks with the almost impossible task of winning the third game by one hundred and nineteen pins to take the overall and three of the individual contests if they wanted to advance to the third final against the Kangaroos later tonight. The Hawks also looked like supplying the only participant for the fuck fest, Debra Mills who at nude and minus seven had a confirmed booking with a yet to be announced member of the audience.

By the third frame of the third game successive spares in the second and third frames to Millie Swan and Peter Craven and a spare in the third to David Jefferson left the Bulldogs with a lead of 36 and the audience, along with Robert and me, the opinion that the match was over as a contest. However we reckoned without the Hawks fighting spirit. Debra Mills added another nine strikes to her opening three for a perfect game — bowled nude and minus seven which was no mean feat — to wipe away the memory of her bad first game. Add to that Peter Craven's nine strike finish, David Jefferson's eight in nine frames and Millie Swan's double in the fifth and sixth, three in the tenth and split pick up — the five-seven — in the seventh frame and we finished with an unexpectedly close finish.

That it finished so close came about because of two open frames by Eva Collis, an unexpected open frame to Eamon McMillan and a number of spares that prevented the Bulldogs bowlers from stringing many strikes together. In the end with all four Hawks bowlers striking out in the tenth frame the three points for the overall and therefore the result of the match was decided by Evan Collis three last frame strikes on the back of a strike in the ninth.

During the interviews with the Bulldogs team we discussed the closeness of the game, the value of three well-placed strikes against a 300 game and whether going into tonight's third final would be of greater benefit to them than the week off for the Kangaroos. The general consensus from the Bulldogs team was that with the same friendly oil pattern in use for the finals that had been in use for the whole season it shouldn't make any difference, not with the likes of Jill Pepper and Peter Rorke in the Kangaroos team.

Finally the Bulldogs interviews were over and it was time to talk to the Hawks' Debra Mills the single participant in the Fuck Fest from either team, her effort in the final game was a first this season. It was impossible to wipe the smile off her face despite the fact that she was standing next us naked and was about to be fucked by the winning ticket holder a plump but extremely enthusiastic middle-aged man.

"Congratulations," said Robert giving Debra a hug and taking a cheek of her bottom in each hand, pressing his flaccid penis against her stomach, "I think that was a first tonight, I can't remember anyone bowling every frame of a 300 game naked."

She smiled as she moved into my embrace and allowed me to take the same liberties before moving back. "Well I suppose the fact that I finished the first game nude and bowled that second game that way probably helped," she grinned as she watched the winning ticket holder being led closer by a tall, physically intimidating female security guard, "and besides earning two thousand for the team there are other benefits." She turned her head and smiled at the nervous man as he came within reach. "Talking about benefits would you like a hand to undress?"

The man nodded as he looked Debra Mills up and down his smile broadening at the same rate as the bulge in the crotch of his slacks increased, and so the interview continued while Debra undressed him. Then as soon as she had removed his briefs to reveal a nice sized erection the interview finished allowing Debra to grab a condom and lead him away by his hard-on.

Saturday Evening — The Third Final — 9^th-The Bulldogs v 7^th-The Kangaroos

Tonight's match, the Bulldogs third successive final, was going to prove one way or another whether continuous bowling was helping the Bulldogs maintain their focus while a week's break and the pressure of a final could make a team like the Kangaroos rusty.

Robert and I differed for the first time in this finals series, you see while Robert thought that the form of Alice Busby and Evan Collis plus staying match hardened would help the Bulldogs get over the line I thought differently. To me the pressure of surviving two finals and playing their third final in the space of twenty four hours would likely take the edge off them and give a fresher Kangaroos a really good chance.

By the seventh frame of the first game it looked like Robert's expert analysis would prove correct with the Bulldogs increasing their 14 pin handicap start by 63 pins to lead by 77. That they did so was due to the Kangaroos Ellen Waltham opening her first two frames and their A-list bowler Jill Pepper her fourth while only sparing the second and the Kangaroo's second A-list bowler, anchor Peter Rorke, only sparing the second, third, fifth and sixth. And when you added Ashley Gifford's five spares in a row after opening with three strikes it seemed liked the Kangaroos were in a heap of trouble.

However the one thing about bowling in four man — person? — teams is that if one team starts striking and the other stops what seems to be a sizeable lead can disappear quickly, and that is exactly what happened. For the Kangaroos Jill Pepper finished off with eight straight strikes after her open fourth frame and Ellen Waltham produced eight of her own plus two spares after her devastating opening two frames. Add Peter Rorke's 6-bagger and it didn't really matter that Ashley Gifford could only finish spare-strike-spare, not when the Bulldogs team could only manage one strike each over the last two frames. To the amazement of the 400 spectators, to Robert and me, and I suspect to the large television audience the Kangaroos had turned a 77 pin deficit into a 16 pin 5pts to 2 first game win. I guess the next question to be answered was were the Bulldogs beginning to feel the pressure or was it just one of those games? Oh, and for those that are curious the Bulldogs' Eva Collis finished the game at nude and minus 2 due to her 188 game against Jill Pepper's 248 and looked to be a definite candidate for the fuck fest.

It turned out that the first game went into the latter category, just one of those games. In the second game after a start in which open frames to Ashley Gifford and Peter Rorke gave the Bulldogs 40 pins to add to their 14 pin handicap the Kangaroos recovered quickly and the second game became a close fought affair with the lead changing hands four times. The Kangaroos reeled in that 54 pin deficit by the fourth frame and led by 9, lost the lead in the fifth and regained it in the sixth only to lose it again in the eighth. The Bulldogs held the lead in the ninth before the crucial tenth frame in which one open frame decided the game.

Alice Busby's three strikes for a splendid 279 matched the three Jill Pepper bowled for a fine 257 while Eamon McMillan rolled two strikes and a nine for another great game this time a 278 against Peter Rorke's three strikes that gave him a game one better than Jill Pepper. Then when Ellen Waltham for the Kangaroos and the Bulldogs' Eva Collis had twenty and nineteen respectively in the last frame it all came down to Evan Collis and Ashley Gifford. When Ashley opened up with a strike Evan had either to match the strike or roll a spare and hope that his opposite number didn't double-up. Unfortunately it wasn't to be and a groan went through the whole audience when his first ball hooked early hit the head pin dead on and left the all but impossible seven-ten split, and when Evan could only take out the seven pin it didn't matter whether Ashley bowled a follow up strike or not. In the end that split was enough to give the Kangaroo the second game by three pins and another 5pts to 2 win for a not insurmountable match lead of 10pts to 4.

In the nudity stakes as predicted Eva Collis did find herself in the fuck fest after finishing the second game at nude and minus 6 while Ellen Waltham also finished the game nude but only minus 1.

In the third and final game of the match the Bulldogs never really recovered from two open frames and two spares in the first two frames, and when Eva Collis could only spare four of her last five frames and Eamon McMillan opened six and seven they were a beaten team despite a solid 269 from Alice Busby. Chief architect of Kangaroos 58 pin win was Peter Rorke with 279 with good backup from Jill Pepper's 245 and Ellen Waltham's 247.

The end result was that the Kangaroos ended the Bulldogs run with an emphatic 18.5 to 5.5 win while Eva Collis at nude and minus eleven was joined by Ellen Waltham who finished at nude and minus five despite that third game 247.

During the interviews the Bulldogs were as happy as losers could be, their $9000 for eighth place plus the evenings haul of $1400 when added to their season's earnings all added up to a nice pay packet even when split four ways. As for the Kangaroos they were happy just to get away with a win and were simply looking forward to playing the Eels in tomorrow afternoon's fourth final.

Finally it was time for the sex show, Eva Collis with a solidly built 22-year-old redheaded man and Ellen Waltham with Robert thanks to a toss of a twenty cent piece that decided that it would be him fucking her and not me. Not that I was disappointed about missing out, with mum and dad hosting their traditional Saturday night orgy I figured I would simply go home and find me a vacant pussy to fuck.

Sunday Afternoon — The Fourth Final — 7^th-The Kangaroos v 6^th-The Eels

After our on air chat about the game during which Robert and I both agreed that the Kangaroos would win fairly comfortably; we interviewed both teams' nominal captains, Peter Rorke of the Kangaroos and Lynn the mother of the Eels Fulton family team.

Robert turned to Lynn. "Let me first offer my congratulations for making it to sixth spot in the final ladder, and ask your thoughts on this afternoon's match?"

"That's funny Robert because as a family and a team that is exactly what we discussed over a light lunch in the restaurant," she moved closer and placed an arm around Peter Rorke's shoulders, "win, lose or draw against Peter's Kangaroos team we plan to enjoy something we may never get to experience again."

"Oh and why is that?" asked Camilla.

"Simply because if anyone had told us before the start of the season that would finish in sixth spot and taking part in the finals we would have laughed, remember we were ranked 24^th out of the 28 teams. Performance wise we would just like to bowl to our capabilities," she leaned across and kissed Peter Rorke on the cheek, "so that Peter and his team will have to bowl well to beat us and so that we give the crowd here and the television audience a good match."

I smiled. "Thank you Lynn we all hope that too." I turned to Peter when Lynn moved back a step so he could take his turn. "Last night's performance must give you some confidence going into this afternoon's match, Peter?"

He smiled. "Well of course. Winning three games and the overall will do that for you, but there is no way that we will underestimate a team like the Eels who have proved capable of matching it with any team all season."

"Good point Peter, with two A-list bowlers, mother Lynn and son Robert, both capable of bowling series in excess of 800 and father and daughter both capable of stringing a good number of strikes together we could be in for a good afternoon."

After bringing Lynn back in the three of us wished both teams' good luck and good bowling before we headed back to the commentary box.

Game one of this afternoon's fourth final quickly developed into a contest between the four A-list bowlers, Jill Pepper and Peter Rorke for the Kangaroos and the Eels aforementioned A-list bowlers. That it happened that way was because the scores of the remaining four bowlers, Ellen Waltham and Ashley Gifford of the Kangaroos and Michael and June Fulton of the Eels cancelled each other out.

In the end the Kangaroo A-list bowlers proved just a little too good. Jill Pepper spared her first frame before rolling ten strikes and a finishing nine for a 289 that Lynn Fulton, she spared her first two frames before finishing with ten strikes of her own for a 279, couldn't quite match. Peter Rorke was the real catalyst though with twelve magnificent balls for a marvellous 300, the fifth of what was proving to be an eventful finals series. It was a game that the 16-year-old Robert Fulton, a potential world champion if ever there was one, came so close to matching. He rolled eleven perfect strikes but it will be his fifth frame, he missed the head pin for a six count and opened to finish with a 264, for which he will be remembered.

Of course apart from the result, 5pts to 2 and 30 pins in favour of the Kangaroos, the four high standard games did affect their direct opponents in the dress, or should that be undress, stakes. Daughter June and father Michael Fulton both finished at nude and minus four courtesy of Jill Pepper and Peter Rorke while for the Kangaroos Ellen Waltham finished at nude and minus 3 and Ashley Gifford nude and minus one thanks to mother Lynn and son Robert Fulton.

When Peter Rorke opened the first two frames of the second game, Ellen Waltham spared the same two plus the fourth and Jill Pepper the first it looked like the Kangaroos just might have conceded the Eels too big a start. This came about because mum Lynn opened with three strikes and daughter June, the supposed weak link of the Eels, produced three in a row after sparing her opening frame to give the Eels their good start.

Of course it was to be expected that the Kangaroos would rally after a poor start and they did. Peter Rorke, not surprisingly, came back with nine strikes in a row to turn 18 after two frames into a finishing 257 while Ellen Waltham produced six strikes in seven balls and Jill Pepper five in a row. For the Eels only Robert Fulton could match that sort of consistent striking while his father Michael, who just could not find any sort of consistent form, with six spares, two open frames and only three strikes finished with a 46 below average 173. In the end it was probably that game that gave the Kangaroos another 5pts to 2 win, this time by thirteen pins. As for the four bowlers who finished nude and varying degrees of minus they all found themselves having to take part in the fuck fest, June and Michael Fulton at minus seven and eleven respectively for the Eels and the Kangaroos Ellen Waltham and Ashley Gifford both at minus five.

A 10pts to 4 lead with a 43 pin advantage might seem a healthy edge after two games of a three game match. However as both teams agreed when Camilla, Robert and I spoke to them in the brief break between games two and three — the equivalent of American baseball's 7^th innings stretch — we thought it wouldn't take much, based on yesterday afternoon's Bulldogs-Hawks match, to turn things around.

In that third game that is exactly what happened; the Kangaroos started off pretty much the same way they did in the second when they found themselves down by 73 pins in the second frame, this time though the deficit was an insurmountable 115. That the lead was that much was because of opening doubles to daughter June and Son Robert a triple from mother Lynn and an opening four-bagger from father Michael that helped the Eels add 84 pins to their handicap advantage of 31.

For the Kangaroos two open frames, four spares and only two strikes in Ashley Gifford's first eight frames when combined with an open frame and two successive spares by Ellen Waltham would prove too much especially with their direct opponents Lynn and Robert Fulton bowling 279 and 278 respectively. Even the talents of Jill Pepper and Peter Rorke couldn't rescue the Kangaroos from what was a massive defeat.

The result, the Eels finished up winning by 118 pins giving them three points for the game and another three for the overall levelling the match at ten points apiece. That left the individual games to decide which team would survive into the second week for a Friday night appointment with the Eagles in the fifth final. With Lynn and Robert winning their matches easily, by 57 and 65 pins respectively and father Michael going down in a close one to Peter Rorke the match finishing up being decided by a mere two pins. When June Fulton rolled a perfect strike with her first ball of the tenth frame whether her immediate opponent, Jill Pepper, rolled three in the tenth would amount to nothing if June could manage a nine count with her next two balls. An eight with her second ball after Jill Pepper rolled a second strike meant that even if Jill made her third strike all June had to do was hit one pin to tie the game to give the Eels the match by 12.5pts to 11.5 or spare it to make the result 13 to 11.

In the end to the roars of the crowd who had suddenly become very pro June Fulton and the Eels team June spared the five-eight — not the easiest two pins to pick up in a pressure situation — with comparative ease to give the Eels that 13pts to 11 win.

In the unofficial race to see whom of four bowlers would finish nude and minus the most it proved to be a tie between two Eels bowlers, daughter June of the D-cup tits, the cuddly physique and the fuck me hips and father Michael of a very erect 8-inch cock. Both finished at nude and minus a massive thirteen and both had beaming smiles on their faces as they contemplated the close come-from-behind win and the prospect of fucking teenage ticket holders. Close behind those two were Kangaroos pair Ashley Gifford, minus eleven, and the chubby blonde Ellen Waltham who finished at minus ten. The four members of the Kangaroos team proved to be good sports; indeed it was Ellen who was responsible for Michael's erect state while June Fulton's magic fingers brought Ashley's nicely sized penis to full erection.

All in all it proved to be a good afternoon, one three-hundred, seven scores in excess of two-fifty with five of those better than two-seventy-five and four bowlers and four members of the four hundred strong audience giving the enthusiastic crowd and a large television audience a show to remember. So what could be better? More of the same next week starting on Friday night with an enticing clash between the Eels and Robert Miles Eagles team in final number five that's what. It was a clash that would require a change in Foxtel's commentary team a change that could become a double one should the Eagles make it to a clash with my Tigers team in final eight on Sunday afternoon. All I knew about my potential Friday partner was that the regular season replacement, Peter Craven of the Hawks, had taken the opportunity of his team's Saturday afternoon loss to make an interstate business trip he had been putting off and wouldn't be available which made the potential replacement an interesting one, little did I know how interesting.

THE REST OF THE WEEK

SUNDAY SEPTEMBER-18