Chapter 7

Nedia will never know how long she stayed in the bathroom, leaning back on the door with her eyes shut, trying to calm down. Time was passing and all she could do was standing there thinking "What am I going to do."

A knock on the door startled her. Nedia stepped away from it and answered, "Yes?"

"Nedia?!! Is everything okay in there?"

"Ah- yes. Yes, I'm just drying my hair." She said the first thing that came to her mind.

She heard him take a deep breath before saying "Okay. Bu..." He was about to say something, but he changed his mind.

Nedia stood there holding her breath until she was completely sure he was gone.

"Okay Nedia, change your clothes quickly. You can't hide in the bathroom forever," she ordered herself as she started taking off her clothes.

After Jessy's visit, Nedia had to go see Noah. She couldn't wait any longer. She called Kate and asked if Nick could stay at Kate's house until she finished something she needed to do. She didn't tell Kate about Jessy's visit. She wanted to go to Noah quickly, besides telling Kate what happened with Jessy would probably take an hour or more. So she dropped Nick off quickly and went straight to Noah's.

When she stopped her car in front of his building, she started having second thoughts. At that exact moment, the picture of Noah watching Nick sleeping in his bed two days before encouraged her, and she decided to do it, regardless of how easy or hard it might be.

Thinking about the easy way and the hard way brought her back to the bathroom and what she was doing.

"Oh it's cold!" She murmured while reaching for Noah's shirt. She held it for a second taking a close look at it.

"Oh my..." was all she could say. She looked at it again. "I know this..."

Nedia thought for a minute then put it on, She opened the door and walked to where Noah was sitting. He didn't notice her at first, lost in his own thoughts. Nedia stood, silently watching him for a moment. He was sitting there on the couch with his head in his hands.

He looked so sad, and it hurt her to see him like this.

"I love you so much" Nedia whispered. She didn't want him to know she still loved him until he told her everything. She wouldn't tell him about Jessy's visit. "I'll just wait for him to tell me the truth" she thought.

Eventually, Noah sensed her presence and when he looked up, their eyes locked.

"Hey," he said, "sit down. I turned on the heater. It will be warmer in a few minutes."

"Thanks, Noah. About the shirt,... is it... ?"

"You remembered it??" he asked then smiled sadly.

"Yes. I..." she didn't know what to say.

"I... Never did wear it again. Not after our date. I... sort of... Uh I just kept it in my closet. If you don't want it I'll get you another one"

She sat down next to him on the couch. "No, its fine..." she smiled then asked "So what do you do? I mean did you go to law school? You wanted too, four years ago." She asked, trying to open the subject but she didn't want to be the one answering the questions, she wanted to be the one asking them.

"I wanted a lot of things four years ago." He smiled again but this time ironically. "You can't have everything huh??"

"You can. You just have to try hard."

Noah got up, took few steps forward "Nedia..." he turned around and in a second he was on his knees in front of her "I swear, I knew nothing about Jessy's phone call."

"Noah you expect me to believe you?" she asked, wanting to show him how bad she felt four years ago. "I don't think you would believe me if you were in my place. Just look at it as I see it. After our date, after we made love, and after I told you I loved you. All you said was I need time to think. Back then I thought, 'yeah sure this is new to him- like you said- you should give him time to think about it.'" Nedia paused, thinking carefully about her next words. "Noah, if you hadn't told me, that night in front of my house, that you loved me, I wouldn't have felt so bad. But you did!! You said you were starting to fall in love with me. You said you wanted me in your life. You said you were going to call me..." Tears started running down her face. She got up, took few steps away from him and turned to continue.

"You can never imagine the way I felt when you didn't call. You can never imagine the way I felt, staying near the phone all day, and the next day, waiting for your call, and in the end, I get a call from Jessy, telling me, 'bottom line, Noah hates you.' It felt so bad, Noah, you'll never know how bad it felt."

"I'll never know??" Noah replied, dumfounded. "Come on, you left me, five days after you said you loved me, after I told you I loved you. You don't think I had feelings too?? You don't think that you broke my heart when you left suddenly like that. You don't think I felt as if someone had put a knife in my heart when I went to your house to find you gone? You were so angry because of a stupid phone call, while I was angry because of something else, something bigger than that..." he was going to continue but stopped and thought for a moment. "Nedia, I meant every word I said that day. I wanted you in my life. But..." he took a step towards her and stopped. He held out his hand for her.

"Come sit down. I'll tell you everything."

Nedia knew that touching him would probably be a very bad idea. 'I have to stay away till he clears everything out'. She took one step forward then turned to sit on a chair far away from him. "I'll sit here. You can say what you want."

"Okay," he smiled but this time not sadly.

'Oh the way he looks when he smiles!!!' She thought.

"I'll start from the second I kissed you goodnight that night; let's see, I drove my car back home. I so wanted to be alone and think..."

"Noah..." she looked at him kindly. "Just tell me what happened."

"Uh- okay. I got a call from Jessy when I got home that night. She said she wanted to meet me. I tried to convince her that everything between us was over, but she chose not to listen to me, like always. I told her that I would meet her the next day. I went there early because I wanted to get things over with, so I could go back home and call you, like I promised. But when Jessy got into my car she..." Noah closed his eyes as if trying to remember the whole scene.