Chapter 48

"Elaine, this is Cheryl. Hope I'm not calling too late."

"Hi, Cheryl. Is there a problem with Cal?"

"Oh, no. Sorry. Didn't mean to frighten you. Listen, I'm calling from Claire's so Cal can't hear me. Cal is going to ISN headquarters for an interview."

"Really?" Elaine exclaimed. "Wow!"

"Well, that's not exactly his reaction," Cheryl cautioned. "He's afraid they're going to try to make him look like a villain because of Renton."

"Then why is he doing it?"

"The coach really wants the publicity. He pretty much ordered Cal to go. The network just confirmed it for Wednesday morning, and he's going to stay over tomorrow night. Cal insisted that we make all the travel and lodging arrangements, and we've done some other things to make it harder for them to make him look like a bully."

"So, I assume you're going with him."

"That's why I called. I just can't take off tomorrow, or Wednesday, either. I want to in the worst way, but you know how tight my schedule is. Could you meet him there? Bud is flying him and Robin will go along, but it isn't the same."

"Absolutely," Elaine almost shouted. "Oh, Cheryl, thank you for thinking of me."

"Here are some of the plans we've made..." They talked for another half hour before Cheryl had to get back to studying.

Darlene and Hal had managed to avoid each other pretty well on Monday. Tuesday morning was the earliest that Julia could fit Darlene in, so Darlene arranged to miss a few hours of work and sat in Julia's office at nine.

"So, you think you ended the marriage Sunday night?" Julia asked after Darlene had recounted the confrontation. "Are you upset about that? Sad? Terrified? Or maybe relieved?"

"Can I be all of those?" Darlene asked.

"I would expect some very mixed emotions," Julia assured her. "The question is, what are you going to do? Are you going to file for divorce? Are you going to try to patch things up? Are you going to do nothing and see what he does?"

"Doing nothing is not an option," Darlene said firmly, "and I don't know what good it would do to patch things up. If I move back into his bed, I'll still be nothing but a body to squirt his stuff into."

"You haven't made any more progress with him, then?" Darlene shook her head in response. "I need to ask you, Darlene: will you be better off with no sex at all. At least now, you get intercourse."

"I've asked myself that as I tried to sleep in Cheryl's bed the last two nights. Lately, when he's in me, I feel more frustration than stimulation. I keep thinking about what he won't let me have. I guess I would be better off without that."

"I just need to be sure you are ready for what's ahead of you if you separate. You don't have another man waiting for you, and it's not that easy to find another partner."

"I can hardly believe I saying this, Julia, but I'm at the place where I won't demand marriage as a condition for sex. I won't break my vows while we're married, but as soon as we're divorced..."

"Wow! That is quite a change for you, Darlene. Do you know what was significant in what you just said?" Again, Darlene shook her head. "You mentioned your vows, but you did not mention being faithful to Hal. That tells me that mentally, you no longer consider him you husband."

"Oooohhhhh!" Darlene moaned. "Do you think I'm terrible? I know you always try to save marriages."

"Yes, I strongly favor reconciliation, Darlene. But I am realistic, too. I know that some marriages cant' - shouldn't - be saved. I just need to be sure that yours is one of those."

"Do you still think Hal could be changed?"

"Not without professional help - probably lots of help. Since he won't talk to anyone, change seems pretty unlikely. There is one thing to consider. The shock of actually starting a divorce might spur him to get help. If he does change, could you reconcile at this point? Do you still love him?"

With her eyes tearing up, Darlene said "It has been hard for me to admit, but I don't think Hal and I ever had real love. At least not like I see all around me. My own daughter; the Banners; the way you talk about your husband; that's what I've missed out on all these years.

"My life isn't over, Julia. In some ways, I feel like it's just starting. I want a chance at real love. If I can't get it from Hal, I need... I need to free myself so I have a chance.

"I don't know how to answer your question. I guess the best answer is that I never loved him like Cheryl loves Cal or Elaine loves Martin. I didn't know I was supposed to. I didn't know that I could. Now, I want to love someone that way, but Hal won't let me. Does that make sense?"

"I'm afraid it does, Darlene. You have been more honest about your feelings than many of my patients ever get. If you want to move ahead with a divorce, this is what I think you should do. It won't be easy, but when it's over, you will feel that you took the high road and gave Hal every possible chance." The rest of the session was spent on plans and strategies.

When Darlene gave Matt her car key and asked if they would eat out Tuesday for dinner, he and Shelley knew instantly what was about to happen. They both hugged their mother and Shelley could not suppress the tears.

Darlene waited until they had finished a conversation-free meal before she dropped the bomb. "I want a divorce, Hal. I'm sorry, but things just aren't working out."

"Why after twenty years is what we had not enough for you?" he demanded, surprising her. She had expected him to say almost nothing.

"What we had was never enough," she said softly. "It just took me twenty years to realize it."

"Well, if we hadn't let Cheryl live so loosely; if you hadn't insisted on getting a job, none of this would have happened," he complained.

"In other words, if you had been able to just keep me in the dark - is that what you mean?" she asked, working hard to keep her voice calm.

"That's not fair!" he almost shouted. "None of this is fair to me!"

"What's not fair is what we both were taught about sex and marriage. What's not fair is what you learned about what makes a real man and how a man should treat a woman."

"So you're blaming my parents?"

"And mine."

"But why do you have to fall for all these new-fangled ideas?" he complained. "Maybe our parents are right. Who says this 'sexual revolution' business is right?"

"It's no revolution, Hal. It's as old as the Bible. Dig out our old copy and read Song of Solomon. You never treated me like that. I don't think you ever thought of me like that. It's not immoral. It's the way it's supposed to be between men and women."

Now, he went into silent mode. He was up against something that he had no answer for. "It would be easiest if we worked with one attorney. I don't want us to part as enemies."

"Then why part at all?"

"Because I want a chance to find what you won't give me. I can't cheat on you while we're married."

"What happened to 'til death do us part'?"

She gave out a long sigh and nodded. "Part of me says that I should just accept my lot and be satisfied. I've tried, but I'm afraid I will go crazy."

"That psychiatrist bitch has got you all screwed up!"

"If you knew how hard she tried to keep me from divorce, you wouldn't say that."

"Do what you want. You will, anyway!" he snarled as he got up and stomped out of the room.

Darlene was still sitting at the table with all of the dinner dishes strewn about when the kids returned. Both of them just started cleaning up, not trying to get her to talk. They were sure the talking and the crying would come later.

Cal had insisted on finishing practice before leaving on Tuesday, so Elaine was already waiting in the hotel room when he arrived. Bud and Robin were staying right next door. They went out on the town, but Cal had to get ready for what he expected to be a battle in the morning.

"We need to be at the TV station at seven for make-up. Judy Morrison arranged this with someone who owed her a favor," Cal explained. "It's a short cab ride from the ISN headquarters."

"Doesn't ISN have makeup people?" she asked, and he explained the concern about changing his appearance. "They almost withdrew the invitation when I insisted I would arrive already made up. For some reason they must really want this. I've dug in my heels several times. Part of the reason I wouldn't let them pay for anything was so I could walk away with a clear conscience if it came to that." By the time he showed her the fake glasses and the classy shirt and tie he would wear with his blazer, she could see that he was really quite worried about the interview.

Even though it would be an early call, mother and son lay awake talking for a long time. He was too nervous to sleep, and she was just reveling in the unexpected chance to be his support at a stressful time. She was certainly happy with his great relationship with Cheryl, but a mother never stops looking for mothering opportunities, even at the strangest of times.

"I'm going to make him look younger," the makeup artist told Elaine when Cal sat in her chair early Wednesday morning. He was too amazed by the complexity of the process to enter into the conversation. "When I'm done, I'll show you how to do final dusting and brushing. You may have to do that a few times during the shooting. From what Judy said, you may have to be a bit of a bitch and keep their makeup person away from him. Can you act like you're experienced at this?"

"Doesn't every woman think she's good at it?" Elaine joked.

"But you don't look like you even have to use makeup," the woman complimented Elaine.

"Why, thank you! Now, make Cal look like he's about fourteen and I'll feel even better."

"Hey, wouldn't that be overdoing it?" Cal protested.

"Not according to Judy's recommendations. That lady usually knows what she is talking about. Here's a kit you can take with you."

Cal could barely refrain from grinning and Elaine let a giggle escape at the expressions that greeted them when they entered the ISN offices. He looked for all the world like a high school nerd all done up for his first dressy date, 'aw shucks' grin and all.

"G... good morning, Mr. Banner. I'm the producer for the show." Cal shook his hand and made sure to bring him just to the point of pain. "If you will step into the prep room, we'll take care of the final makeup."

There were several people hanging around, but Cal decided to follow the plan anyway. The producer's attempt to go back on the makeup 'deal' was just what it took to get him in the right mood. The schoolboy disappeared in a flash, to be replaced by a mouthy, belligerent tough guy.

"Listen. Don't start any of that bullshit. I told you last night that you don't touch the makeup. What'd you think? Promise the stupid kid anything and you'll get your way when I get here? I will have no problem walking right out of here, and you can run NFL Classics or something tonight. Are we clear?"

"But we have to be sure things are right for our lighting and..."

"I'll give you one more chance to start over," Cal said with a snarl that made Elaine shiver, though she half expected it. "I know exactly what you hoped to get out of this charade, and I'm telling you now it's not going to happen. Do you want me to stay? My mother has a touch up kit and she will take care of it."

"I don't understand why you are being so belligerent about things," the producer whined.

"Oh, give it up it!" Cal said, staying in character. "Who is doing the interviewing?"

"Angela Reese," the producer answered.

"Just great!" Cal spat out, recognizing the woman as working for ISN's parent network. "An info babe who doesn't know shit about sports. She's never done a positive interview in her whole fuckin' career. She's probably got a burr in her ass about violence in football." He and Elaine had had a rather heated discussion about the level of crudity he should employ. He insisted that it was necessary.

"How dare you speak about me that way!" Ms. Reese yelled as she walked into the office, obviously having been just outside.

Cal had to improvise pretty quickly at this unexpected encounter. Purposely insulting people was totally against his nature. Doing it to someone's face was like a crime to him. "Because I've seen what you do. Since you never bother with normal politeness with your 'victims', I don't feel any obligation."

"I'm going to enjoy tearing you a new one, you insolent jerk!" she screeched. It took quite a bit of effort, but Cal managed a pretty convincing belly laugh.

Turning to the producer. "Still going to deny you had a hatchet job planned?" The producer was livid, but he could not decide what to say. "This is supposed to be a sports network. How did they talk you into this garbage?"

"They own us. They call the shots," the producer finally mumbled.

"So, give me one good reason why I should go on camera with her" Cal demanded with a contemptuous wave toward Reese.

"Your coach agreed," was all the producer could come up with.

It looked like Cal would be going home early, since there was no way he would subject himself to Angela Reese. His confidence in his verbal skills just wasn't that great. Just then, he was surprised to see a familiar face in the doorway. It was the reporter that he had chatted with at Cheryl's game. He had assumed that she was local, but apparently she worked for ISN. He had a sudden inspiration.

"You've got two choices. Either you haul out your NFL Classics, or she does the interview." He pointed to the young woman in the doorway. "I'm sorry, I don't even know her name, but I do know that she is easy to talk to and that she knows something about sports."

"But... but she's doesn't do on-air!" the producer protested.

"I was assigned to do this spot! You can't just give it to some gofer!" Reese shouted almost simultaneously.

"You're the ones who tried to make a bully out of me. Don't blame me if you get nothing out of this," Cal said. He turned and took Elaine's arm to lead her out of the office. Over his shoulder, he said. "There's a coffee shop in the lobby. We'll be there for fifteen minutes if you change your minds."

Elaine was blown away by Cal's performance, but when the arguing started before they were out of earshot, she broke into laughter, having to hang on to Cal for support. He stopped and waited for her to settle down, then gave her a hug and tried to give her a kiss.

"Hey, hey. Don't mess your makeup. I'm really not that good at the touchup."

"Doesn't look like I'll be needing it," he said rather cheerfully.

"Yes you will. We should probably wait for the producer right here," she predicted.

Sure enough, he came out in less than five minutes. Standing in the hallway, in front of the elevators, he said "OK. I'll admit we were planning, uh, an expose. Ms. Reese has agreed to do a straight interview with no agenda."

"Not good enough. Having her do any interview on your channel is an insult to college football. I won't be part of it."

"You're killing me, here!" the producer complained. "I can't just go against the corporate guys."

"You're down to choosing what kind of trouble you're going to be in. It's what you get for agreeing to such a dirty trick in the first place. You either get no interview at all, or you get a good one with the wrong interviewer."

The producer groaned pathetically and looked toward Elaine with a pleading expression, as if she could change Cal's mind. "Don't look at me," she said, "I'm just as pissed at you as he is."

With another groan, the producer said "Wait here. If I come back with my head still attached, we can work something out."

After fifteen minutes, Cal had just decided to give it up and leave when Reese went stomping past and the producer came out, shaking his head in disbelief. "I'll be damned! The boss grew a set of balls! Oh, sorry, Ma'am. None of us liked what was going down. We really do want to be a sports network. He didn't even check with corporate." He continued shaking is head in wonderment.

"Pru... that's Prudence Rice, the woman you met, just came in work clothes, and she's all worried about her hair and everything."

"Hey, let's keep it casual," Cal suggested. "It's a sports show, right? Have you got some ISN T-shirts around? I'll wear one of those."

"Pick a nice tight one, Hon," Elaine blurted out, then blushed brightly.

Chuckling, the producer said to Cal "That would be perfect. My boss is on the phone. He wants to talk to you."

"Mr. Banner," the man on the phone said, "I'm the general manager of ISN. First, I want to apologize for the shameful way we tried to steamroll you. I see that we had no more luck than those kick returners. Are you sure you want Miss Rice to do it? We have more experienced on-air people in the office?"

"I chose her on the spur of the moment. I knew it would piss off Reese, and I did enjoy talking to Miss Rice. She seemed like she was genuinely interested in my answers. As long as I've messed up your plans, let's go with her." Cal had the fleeting feeling that he was running the show and he rather liked it.

"God! I never expected anything like this!" Pru exclaimed as she and Cal sat side-by-side getting their makeup finalized. He had decided that there was no longer any reason to be belligerent about it. All of their careful defensive planning had been discarded. The fake glasses would not be used, and he wore a network logo T-shirt that he could just barely get on. It clearly showed the outline of the corded muscles on his torso.

"Let's just have fun," Cal told her. "I've got a studio disk with all of my plays on it. We can run that to make some points. Let's do less talk and more action, OK?"

"Th... this is like a fairy tale," Pru mouthed, as if she had not even heard Cal. "I thought it would be years before I got on camera, if ever. They let me go out last weekend kind of to throw me a bone."

"Hey, don't worry about it," Cal said. "I'm at least as nervous as you are. We'll pretend we're just talking, like at the volleyball game."

"The sports media has unanimously referred to you as the man who wrecked Rory Renton's shoulder. How do you feel about that?" Pru asked after a brief introduction.

"I wish they'd get it right," Cal said with a dramatic, sad shake of his head. "It was the coach on the sideline who wrecked Renton's shoulder. If that coach had not been too close, there would have been no problem. Actually, he was just the unlucky one. Show clip #1 at the thirteen second mark - there! See all of the coaches and support people right up close? That's not safe."

"So, you're saying that if the coaches had all stayed a safe distance back, Renton would not have been injured?" Pru asked.

"That's right."

"But you up-ended him. Wouldn't he have been injured just from hitting the ground head first?"

"OK, let's step the action ahead very slowly until just before Renton crashes into the coach. Look there. See how his hand is extended, reaching for the ground? He would have been able to control his fall and maybe even somersault himself back onto his feet. Remember how he did that one-armed handspring in the end zone last year after an interception return?"

"Do you think he really could have done that?" Pru asked in honest amazement. "That seems almost impossible!"

"You have to remember what an exceptional athlete he is," Cal said seriously. "I have no doubt that he could have been an Olympic gymnast if he had chosen that sport. Back up the clip to that little fake he made. Show that in real time, please. Again. A human being should not be able to make a move that fast."