Chapter 13

Lena jolted awake when the screams of her lover pierced her ears. Casey was drenched in sweat, shaking her head back and forth rapidly and her mouth was wide open screaming at the top of her lungs. Her eyes were clenched tightly shut and her whole body shook with tremors, her muscles taut with the extreme tension. Her arms were out in front of her like she was warding off blows.

Lena touched her and Casey swung an arm in her direction. Luckily she managed to duck in time. Casey's fist swished over the top of her head and slammed into the wall, denting it deeply. There was blood left in the divot from the cuts on Casey's knuckles. Lena didn't know what to do. She was physically afraid of Casey now; she slipped out of the bed and stood there covering her ears from the screams. Casey continued to shudder and spasm from her nightmare.

Then suddenly, Casey's eyes shot open glowing a deeper red than before, and the scream that came from her throat made the blood in Lena's body turn to ice water. There was something otherworldly about that primal scream, like two voices coming from her mouth; one that was Casey and one that wasn't human at all.

Casey flopped back onto the bed after that last scream, exhausted and breathless. She closed her eyes and started to cry, the sobs wracking her body, her voice hoarse from the screams. She curled into a fetal ball and sobbed and moaned so deep that Lena wasn't even sure if it was her making that noise. Lena was shivering from shock and fear. This was way beyond anything in her life. She had no idea what she could do for her. She didn't want to touch her again, fearing another flying fist.

Lena glanced at the spot on the wall and saw the bloody streaks and the crushed sheetrock. It looked as if a blood-covered hammer had hit it. Lena heard the wispy-hoarse voice of her lover trying to speak. She stepped around the bed to look at her and tried to hear what she was saying.

"What have I done? There's no going back."

Lena listened as Casey chanted this over and over again in a haunted mantra. Her voice sounding like it was issuing forth from the bottom of a grave. It chilled her bones to hear that voice. She was frightened for Casey and also for herself. She felt the need to comfort Casey but fear of physical harm stopped her. She could only watch as Casey's body shook with her sobs. They eventually faded and Casey rolled over and reached out for Lena but found the bed empty. This started her sobbing again.

"Oh, Lena. Lena, my love. Oh god, Lena. I need you."

When Lena heard this, she felt it was safe to get back into bed. She reached out for Casey.

"I'm still here, Casey. I'm here for you."

Casey reached out and pulled Lena closer to her before hugging her tightly. Her sobs echoed off the walls as she hung onto Lena for comfort. Lena wrapped her arms around Casey and squeezed her tightly. Whispering in her ear,

"I'm here, my love. I'm here for you."

Casey's sobs subsided as she hugged her and after a while, they faded into soft crying. Casey sniffled and shuddered.

"Oh, Lena, please don't leave me. I need you so much. I need your strength."

Casey whispered to her. Lena hugged her tightly and reassured Casey

.

"No, Casey, I won't leave you. I need you too and I don't ever want to lose you."

Casey nodded her head and kissed Lena's neck.

"What was that, Casey? You scared me."

Casey squeezed her tightly and shuddered.

"Oh, god, Lena. I don't know if I can tell you. It's so horrible; I don't want you to leave me. I'm afraid if you know, you'll leave. I couldn't go on if you left me."

Casey started to cry again. Lena listened to what Casey said to her and it scared her. What could she have done that would make me leave her? Oh, god, she hadn't had sex with Dagomarus again, had she? That had to be it. Lena felt sick to her stomach thinking about it. She didn't know if she could handle that if she were presented with the admission. She had to know the answer. If she didn't hear it from Casey, she would always wonder whether it had happened or not. She just had to ask.

"Casey. Did you have sex with Dagomarus?"

She almost gagged when she asked that question; her stomach seemed like a cold ball of lead as she waited for Casey's reply. Casey snorted and shook her head. Pure relief of seeing that reaction flooded through Lena's body with a giddy delight. She felt light headed, almost euphoric in her relief that Casey hadn't done that to her. What could be worse than that? She couldn't think of anything that would crush her more and make her consider leaving Casey.

"Casey, if it wasn't that, then what? Honestly, my love, if it wasn't that, I don't care what you did."

Casey shuddered again and shook her head.

"I don't know if I can tell you."

Casey sighed and kissed Lena's neck again. She pulled away and looked into her eyes. Lena met her gaze, although the red glow was still there, it wasn't as intense as before. Lena kissed the tip of Casey's nose and smiled.

"Its okay, my love. I am here for you. What's bothering you?"

Casey took a deep breath and told Lena about the beating she had received from Scott, the threat of torture, and her death. Then she told Lena what happened when she came out of her shift and discovered what she had done to Scott. She didn't go into all the gory details, just that while she was in her werewolf form, she had eaten parts of Scott's body. When she had finished, she was frightened of what Lena would do or say. Lena continued to stare into her eyes for a few minutes, not saying anything. Then she shrugged her shoulders.

"Casey, my love, I won't leave you because of that. It disturbs me, but I'm not about to stop loving you because of it. I am frightened of what you are capable of when you have these nightmares though."

Lena pointed to the bloody divot in the wall and looked back at Casey.

"You almost hit me when I touched you. I ducked and you hit the wall."

Casey kissed Lena and squeezed her tight.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Lena. I didn't know that happened. I don't remember you touching me. Dagomarus warned me that I'd have nightmares because of what I have done. He said that it might also take years to stop having them."

"When he asked me if you loved me, I told him that you did. He said that was good. Because having someone to hold you and love you—even when you screw up their sleep with your nightmares—is something very precious. He told me I should never let you go. Well, my lovely Lena, I don't ever want to do that. And I hope that you will still love me, even in the mornings after I've kept you awake with my terrors."

"Oh, my sweet Casey, I love you too much for something like this to break us up. Yes, you scared me, but I've never stopped loving you. I will do whatever I can to help you. Because the thought of what you did bothers you so much, I can't stop loving you over something that you all ready beat yourself up for. You have no control over that part of you, and yet you are torn up about it. Even after Scott told you that he was going to torture you to death, you still feel guilty for doing it. That must mean that you never wanted to take his life and that makes all the difference."

"Oh, Lena, I love with you so much, thank you for your understanding."

Casey kissed her softly and smiled.

"How many times have you had these nightmares?"

"Tonight was the first time. I don't know what set it off."

"Well, let's hope that you don't have too many of those again, but if you do, I'm here for you, Casey."

"Thank you, Lena. I don't plan on ever letting you go."

The hugged and kissed, sharing their contentment. Casey couldn't help but remember the other thing that Dagomarus had said. That one day Lena would drive her away.

They eventually fell back to sleep and didn't wake up until Casey's alarm went off. She groaned, slammed it down and went back to sleep. Two hours later they felt that they had slept long enough to recover from the night's activities. They uncurled from each other and sat up, stretching and yawning. Lena looked over at Casey and gasped. Casey heard her and looked over at her.

"What?"

"Your eyes. They're different. Go look."

Casey frowned and went over to the mirror. She jerked her head back and looked over at Lena, then back at the mirror again. Her eyes were different. They were a deeper green, almost forest green now, and the tiny flecks of gold that had been there, were a lot bigger. They gave the effect of gold leaf rubbed into a forest green canvas. They were iridescent and glowed with an inner light.

"Well, that's going to be fun trying to explain. Everyone knows I don't wear glasses or contacts, so that excuse won't fly. Any ideas, my smart, sexy Lena?"

"Well, flattery will get you into my pants, oops, I'm not wearing any. Okay, okay, sorry. Let me think about it for a few minutes. I haven't had my morning injection of caffeine yet."

Casey smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, let me go make some. Regular or fully leaded?"

"Make it high octane race fuel, please."

"One pot of race fuel coming up."

Casey walked to the kitchen and reached for her secret stash. She took out a sealed container and popped it open. She then retrieved the bag of Sello Roho coffee and scooped out enough to make a pot of high-octane coffee. Normally this was only available on the streets of Columbia, but she had bought this over the Internet. Starbuck's couldn't even come close to how good this stuff tasted; they were a pale wanna-be compared to this. The Hawaiian stuff she had tried from a friend came close, but this stuff had the caffeine equivalent of a six-pack of Jolt Cola.

When the coffee was brewing and Casey was automatically going through her normal breakfast ritual, Lena walked in.

"Oh my god, what kind of coffee are you making? You can't even see daylight through the carafe!"

"You said you wanted race fuel, so there it is. Don't judge it before you have tried it."

Casey continued heating the two skillets and got out her bacon and eggs. She peeled off a dozen slices and laid them out on the griddle before cracking six eggs into a small bowl. She put her bread into the toaster and then returned to the stove to flip the bacon. Lena watched her actions with amusement, and wondered if Casey really thought she was going to eat that much this morning. Casey turned and looked at her.

"What would you like this morning? I have some yogurt or there's oatmeal."

Lena's reaction to the amount of high cholesterol food that Casey was cooking amused her. Lena looked closely at Casey's muscle tone, noticing how much Casey's body resembled that of a gymnast's, no evidence of body fat but highly defined muscles.

"You are going to eat all this and you have a figure like that?"

Casey glanced down at herself and then back over towards the stove. She blushed and grinned.

"Yeah, I've been eating like this since I got back from the mountains. I also eat two, twelve to fourteen-ounce steaks for lunch and another pair for dinner. If I don't eat lunch, then I eat more at dinner."

"CHRIST! Casey, you should be putting on the pounds with that kind of diet. I can tell by looking at that beautiful rippled tummy of yours and that nice ass, you aren't gaining any weight."

"Nope, I worried about that too but I seem to burn it all off. I hate to flaunt it in front of you like this, but if I don't eat this much I start to feel sick and light headed."

"Wow! This is going to take some getting used to."

"Yeah, you aren't the only one. This is killing my savings account. I had to order a large deep freezer. I also placed an order at the butcher shop for a side of beef and a side of pork, roughly 400 pounds of meat. At the rate I'm going through meat; that might last for two months. I don't make that much money working for Steve. Which brings up something I was going to talk about to you last night, but you had something stuffed in my mouth."

Lena blushed and laughed.

"I can't get over how much you are eating. I can help you out if you need to get some more groceries."

"No, but thanks, Lena. I wanted to discuss something important with you. Let me finish fixing this and we'll talk. What do you want to eat? Besides that, you minx."

"I guess the yogurt, black cherry if you have some."

Casey nodded that she had and took it out of the fridge for her. She finished cooking her bacon and eggs. She then smothered honey-butter on her toast. Lena watched her in awe and still wondered how she could eat so much. When Casey wiped up the last of the egg yolk with her toast she popped it into her mouth and hummed contentedly. She sipped her coffee and felt the rush of caffeine hit her system. Lena sipped hers and smiled, Casey had been right, it was very dark and very rich but it wasn't bitter at all.

"Well, now that I don't have the raving urge to fill my mouth with eggs and bacon, we can talk. I saw that look, and I'll eat that for dessert, now hush. I want to run an idea past you, but I don't want you to feel pressured in any way. I'm thinking of quitting at the Acantha and trying to find something in Helena."

Lena beamed and snickered.

"You're trying to see if I want you to move in with me, aren't you? Well, the answer is YES! I would love it if you would move in with me."

"Well, that was part of it, and thank you, that really means a lot to me, Lena. I am serious about getting a new job, something that pays more so I can afford these trips to the butcher shop. I have briefly toyed with the idea of getting a high power rifle and start hunting. I can get a lot of meat from an elk or moose."

"That's great about the job and moving, but hunting? Are you sure about doing that?"

"Well, yeah, I was thinking about it, why not?"

"I don't know, I guess I just didn't see that one coming. It's not that I don't think you can do it, it's just that, well, I don't know. I am sitting here looking at you naked and trying to picture you with a rifle standing over a dead moose. It just doesn't add up."

"Silly, I'd wear hunting clothes! OW! Watch where you pinch, would you? Okay, seriously, yeah, I think I can do that and I wouldn't mind doing it. You know me; I love to go hiking and camping. Well, it'd be just like that, except with a gun and hauling back some meat for the freezer. I might even try a bow and go for multiple seasons and more meat."

"You are serious! Wow. Well, if you want to do that, I guess I wouldn't have any trouble with it. As long as you don't try and make me clean the damn things after you shoot them."

"Oh, good point. Cleaning them. I hadn't thought that far ahead yet. I'm going to have to find someone to teach me how. I really don't think something like that could be learned from a book. I'll ask Steve about it."

"What makes you think Steve knows anything about it? I've never seen him read a hunting magazine, let alone hunt."

"Oh, I guess I assumed since he was a guy, he'd know."

"Hah! Yes, Steve has a penis, therefore he's a guy, but when it comes to outdoor stuff, he's a wimp."

"Well, that only leaves one other penis bearer and I'm not real whoopee about talking to him again."

Lena chuckled at Casey's comment and shook her head.

"That's the second time you've made a comment that makes me think you've been reading bull-lesbian underground literature. You sure you weren't a lesbian before I met you?"

Casey stuck her tongue out at Lena and wiggled it at her.

"Ha-ha, very funny. No, I haven't been reading that stuff. I just used that term because it suits him. He's not a person, especially because of the way he's been trying to get into my pants and he can't seem to understand the term 'no' very well. He's a penis bearer."

"Okay, I believe you. Wow. I guess I don't have to sweat on that one either."

Casey frowned at Lena.

"What? Just because I used to play with those, you're worried I might go back for a quick fix or something? Lena, never. I guess you made a convert out of me. Although, it's weird, I say that because I forgot to tell you about Charlenne."

"Who's Charlenne, do I need to be concerned about women too?"

Casey laughed and stroked Lena's cheek gently.

"No, my love. I only have eyes for you. Charlenne confided to me at work yesterday. She had been informed of my status change by Faith, and had wondered if it was true. She tried a little come on attempt to me as well, but it was more of a way to find out if I felt the same as she did. I told her about us and I did invite her over sometime to meet you. Perhaps you can find her a playmate?"

Lena laughed at that comment.

"Well, well. You are bringing them out of the woodwork. I knew that ass of yours was irresistible, and now that your eyes look like that, you'll be beating them back with a stick. Oh, chill out. I don't know about finding her a date, but we'll see. Is she pretty? Got a decent personality?"

"Well, I would never use the term pretty for Charlenne. I'd say cute, as long as she is smiling and being her cheerful self. Otherwise, she's so plain she blends into the background. I know that sounds cruel, but she does, and she confessed to me she does it intentionally to survive the rigors of high school cliques."

"Oh, okay. So, not a hottie. That might make things easier though to get her a date. Girls around here that are looking don't want a sex kitten next to them. It brings them too much attention. Why do you think it was so hard for me?"

"Yes, I can see that. Your ass is so scrumptious to look at it made this straight girl cross over."

Casey grinned at Lena and reached over to caress it; Lena hummed and wiggled her appreciation.

"So, now that we know we love to look at each other's ass, what were we talking about?"

"Me moving in with you, silly. I still want to keep this house. It's paid for, thanks to dad's life insurance policy. So all I have to pay for is the taxes and homeowners insurance. I will need it for the down time after my monthly trip into the woods."

"Heh, the way you keep saying it like that, you make it sound like you have a bad case of the monthly cramps, not, well, you know."

"See, even you can't say it out loud. It's like if we don't say it, it won't be true. Yes, Lena, once a month my PMS goes all to hell and I turn into a werewolf."

"Yeah, okay. I guess maybe because I haven't seen you like that, it really hasn't sunk in."

"Trust me, Lena. Until Dagomarus teaches me to control the shift, to become aware inside myself when I've shifted, you don't want to be anywhere near me. I killed and ate someone who was near me last time."

"I'm sorry, Casey, I didn't mean to bring that up."

"No, that's okay. If I keep these thoughts inside, it'll make it worse. I do know how you can make it up to me, though."

"Oh, and how's that?"

"Sit on my face and tell me that you love me."

An hour later they were back in the kitchen getting something to drink. Casey blushed.

"I'm so sorry about that, Lena. I was trying not to laugh, sing that stupid Monty Python song in my head and cum at the same time."

"Its okay, Casey, I like it. I really don't mind it when you squirt like that. It tastes like you and its fun."

"You really don't mind?"

"Remember when I said I was a pervert?"

"Yeah, but I thought you were talking about your thing with my feet."

"No, that's a fetish. I like wet sex."

Lena waited to see if Casey was disgusted.

"You mean you like doing it in the shower or what I just did to you?"

"Oh my, Casey. You really did grow up in a small town. Casey, wet sex means that I like to be peed on, like all over. Golden showers?"

"Oh."

Casey wondered about that for a few seconds. Wow. Getting excited about someone pissing on you. Nope, it doesn't really do much for me thinking about it. Could I do that to her? That seems so degrading somehow.

"Why, Lena?"

"You mean, why do I like it? Well, I guess it comes from all those times in the locker room after soccer. We would sometimes pee in the shower instead of walking across the floor dripping water all over the place. Then it turned into a game of who could squirt pee standing up. Then it was a game of who could pee on someone else before they could do it to you. Now I get really turned on by it."

"Oh. You want me to do that to you?"

"Only if you want to. It's no fun if the other person isn't into it."

"Okay, give me some time to think about it. I'm not turned off by it, Lena; just not sure I could do that to you."

"I understand. Don't worry about it. I told you about that so you wouldn't be so freaked out about your squirting me in the face when you cum so hard."

Lena smiled and hugged Casey to reassure her that all was well between them.

When Casey walked into the office at noon she was chipper and content. She had spent the night making love, and although there had been that one bad episode, Lena had pulled her through it. Then that big breakfast. More sex, and then steaks, followed by even more sex. She still wasn't sure what to make of the wet sex thing that Lena talked about, but if that's what she's into, I'll try it for her. Maybe I'll surprise her with it some time, perhaps when we take a shower together.

She still hadn't taken off her sunglasses yet, and she didn't plan to. She figured that for today, she could get away with it, maybe. She was still grinning to herself when Faith popped out of her office and snipped at her.

"I still have a deadline, you know. It must be nice being able to come and go as you please."

That ruined Casey's mood right then and there. She almost growled at Faith, but she held back.

"Look Faith, just worry about your own time card, and I'll worry about mine, okay?"

Casey started to walk around her when Faith grabbed Casey's arm.

"I'm not losing my job just because you can't get it together."

Casey didn't even think about it when she did it, she took her sunglasses off and looked Faith straight in the eye.

"Faith, you touch me like that one more time and you'll have more to worry about than your fucking job."

She turned and walked to her desk. She booted her computer up and lined up what she needed to do to make up for her late start. It turned out that it really wasn't that much and she finished it quickly. Her mind focused on the task at hand with a steeled determination. She closed down the graphics program and brought up the word processor. She typed a resume followed by a letter of resignation. She printed them both before making several copies of her resume. She slipped them into a folder before folding the letter and slipping it into an envelope. She wrote Steve's name on the outside and got up from her desk.

She walked over to Steve's office and knocked on the door. She heard him talking to somebody inside and then he shouted out, "Wait a minute-'," through the door. Shortly afterwards, the door opened and Faith walked out. She shot Casey a triumphant look and walked straight past her. Casey just shrugged and when Steve noticed her and looked uncomfortable, she just smiled at him and handed him the letter.

"There you go Steve; all your troubles are answered. It's my resignation. I quit."

Casey turned, went to her desk and gathered up her things before heading for the door. Faith had just heard her announcement and she was pissed. She had wanted to get Casey into trouble and here she was walking out before that could happen. She had hoped to get her fired, but by quitting, Casey still held the high ground.

"Casey, wait a minute. Why?"

"Well, Steve, I have had it with that little bitch over there. I was in a perfectly happy mood when I came to work today. But when she jumped me three seconds after walking in and implied that I was trying to get her fired because I wouldn't let her finish the interview, which by the way, lasted over two hours yesterday. Then she had the gall to grab me physically, which I told her was a really bad idea and to not ever do it again. Since I was planning on it anyway, that just put the icing on the cake and instead of in two weeks, I'm out of here today."

"She didn't finish the interview after two hours? Then grabbed you?"

"Yeah, but it doesn't matter now Steve, I'm leaving."

"What if I fired Faith instead? Would you stay then?"

Faith went pale and started squeaking.

"Nope. I was planning on moving to Helena. I have an offer for a place to live there now."

"OH! That's great Casey! I'm happy for you! So, you really were planning on leaving, then?"

"Yeah, I was going to give you some time to look for somebody new, but, well..."

"I see."

Steve turned towards Faith.

"You're fired Faith. I won't have that kind of behavior in my building. You lied, manipulated me, and you slandered one of your own co-workers. That's it. Get your stuff and get out."

Steve turned back to Casey and arched an eyebrow. Faith huffed at being snubbed like that and then turned and quickly walked away.

"Well, the Acantha is going to be a little thin for awhile. Do you know anybody who could fill in for either you or Faith?"

"Yeah, I do, Steve. Ask Charlenne if she wants either job."

"Really? Charlenne? Why her? She just sits there and quietly does her work. She isn't qualified to do either of the jobs."

"I think you're wrong on that one. I thought the same thing until I had a little chat with her the other day. She's smart and she is willing to do the job, if someone would give her the chance to shine, I think she would."

"If you say so. I'll call her in now and see what she says."

"Steve, if she wants my job, I'll stick around long enough to train her. I'd do that much for you."

"You would? Okay, then. I'll tell her. Thanks Casey."

Steve went back into his office and made the call. He came back out a few minutes later with a strange grin on his face.

"When I told her a little of what happened today and offered her either position, she said that if you were the one to do her training, she would try her best and fill in for you and take the job."

"See, I told you she would surprise you. Don't worry, Steve. She's smart; she just hides it when people intimidate her."

"Ah, okay. I'm still without a reporter. Any more genius ideas?"

"Nope, you got my one shining example."

"I do appreciate that, really. Here, take this, you'll need it until you get settled in at your new place and find a job down there. I'll also write you up a good reference letter as well."

Steve handed her an envelope.

"It's a month's severance pay. You deserve it after having this crap happen to you."

"Thanks, Steve. I don't know what to say."

"You already did, and you're welcome."

Casey started to cry and Steve hugged her.

"Go on, go home and be here tomorrow morning to start training Charlenne."

Casey nodded and walked out.

She stopped by the bank and deposited the check, which gave her a huge nest egg. Since she would also get a regular paycheck while training Charlenne, she could afford to buy a little something else. She made one more stop.

She walked into the store and started looking around. She was in awe at all the various kinds of guns that adorned the walls and racks. Some looked rather beaten up and very well used, while others were sparkling clean and had a high sheen polish on the wood stocks. The store clerk had watched her come in and was quietly sizing her up. He wasn't sure if she was just looking for a gift or if she was some out of town nutcase looking for trouble. Casey finally made it around to the front counter where the clerk was standing and smiled at him. He smiled back.

"Can I help you find something, miss?"

"Yes, I would appreciate it if you could help me pick out a hunting rifle."

"Okay, we have lots of them. Is there anything specific your friend wants to hunt?"

"Oh, no, you misunderstood me. I want the hunting rifle for myself. I want to hunt elk and moose. Maybe deer, but mostly elk and moose."

His eyes bulged and then he smiled.

"Okay. Sure thing. Sorry about that comment. It's not every day we get a pretty woman in here shopping for a hunting rifle for herself."

"No offense taken. Really. I just need a good rifle to take down elk and moose."

"Sure. What distances are you planning on shooting from?"

"Hmmm, good question."

She thought about that for a second, and decided that she could get very close with her new abilities.

"Probably less than a hundred yards, sometimes further, but usually shorter."

"Okay, so you are planning on stalking them?"

"Yes, definitely."

He smiled at her confident response. Well, what the hell? Why not?

"Okay, so you won't need a scope or at least a big one."

"No, no scope. My eyesight is perfect."