Chapter 108

I hung up the phone.

"I hate this thing already."

"Oh, Jack, don't be an old grump."

"Hey. I thought Harpo didn't speak."

"Only in the movies, Jack."

We went downstairs and into the kitchen. Bozo was perturbed that I made him stay in the apartment. I figured it was bad enough being pussy whipped; I wasn't about to become dog whipped, too.

I'd seen Charlie's costume the day of the great spaghetti disaster over at John's. As far as pirates went, it was pretty good. Mary was supposed to be a captured maiden, his prisoner of love, but I hadn't seen what she was going to wear.

She had done something with her hair to make it look messed up and sexy at the same time. She was wearing a black dress, at one time probably down to or close to the ground, but it had been torn. The hem on the right side was about three inches above her ankle. The torn edge slanted up, not quite equally in the front and the back, to a point on the right that was just above the middle of her thigh. It was tight around her butt and there was a definite molding to her bust with an expanse of bare skin below her neck and to the lower middle of her back. There were arms to the dress, maybe down to the middle of her biceps, with material that sat on her shoulders, leaving about half of them bare. The material on her left shoulder was torn, as if someone had taken hold of it and pulled. Nothing was seen; everything was shown. My little sister was growing up.

"Looking good, Mary. Do you need a lift to Charlie's?"

"Nope, he's going to drive tonight."

"Wow. That's the first time..."

"Yeah, the first time since our incident."

"Are you going to be OK?"

"Yeah, I can't have you or Mom driving me around for the rest of my life. You can be damn sure if anybody swerves at us, we'll knock them off the road before we go into a ditch."

"How is Charlie about this?"

"Nervous, but he feels the same way I do."

"Well, good. I hope you two have a good time."

"I'm sure we will."

Sara came out with a big smile on her face. There was no way she found her costume at a thrift store.

"Did you get that at a Halloween store?"

"Nope, I made it."

"Get out of here. Really?"

"Really. I'm more than just a pretty face."

"I guess so. That's fantastic."

This was a tight dress, close to being a mini skirt. She showed a lot of leg. Heck, most of her legs. It was held up by a piece over her right shoulder and sloped down to just under her left armpit. It was cut to fit her body exactly, almost like a bathing suit. And it looked like it was made of leopard skin. She had a red wig on, done up in a bun behind her head. Her shoes were smooth cloth, almost like ballet slippers.

I couldn't help laughing when Chris came out.

"Nice pantyhose, Chris."

"Don't be an ass, Jack. They're tights."

"Yeah, whatever. Just watch where you bend over. Make sure Jeff's not behind you."

"Ha, Ha."

His costume was obviously another that didn't come off the shelf. It was similar to Sara's but brown instead of leopard skin. It wasn't as form fitting as hers, either. Chris looked like he'd gained a good thirty pounds; he was wearing some kind of stuffing or a pillow under the costume. He had a brown wig that made him look like Moe from the three stooges. His feet were in sandals.

Jill was looking them over. "I give up."

I looked at her. "Fred and Wilma."

"Huh?"

"The Flintstones."

"Oh." She still didn't look convinced. What kind of childhood had this poor girl had?

The four of us piled in my car and drove to school. Since it was cold out, we all wore coats. The other three left their wigs in the car and I did with my glasses and nose. Most of the people at the game were wearing coats, so it was hard to tell who was in costume and who wasn't. Some had wigs or makeup that made it evident. I noticed most of the Britneys were covered up, too, but the wigs gave them away.

Jill was disappointed in our football game. It was actually a pretty good game; the score was close and the lead changed hands several times until we scored a field goal with a couple of minutes to go. The other team just wasn't good enough to make it down the field in the remaining time. Jill's idea of a good game was her team being well ahead the whole game and winning by at least three touchdowns.

After the game, we went to the car and picked up our wigs, checking each other out to make sure everything was in place, and in Sara's case, that everything was covered up. Jill didn't have that problem, but I wondered how my sister would take it if some over-zealous chaperon took it upon herself to keep her out of the dance at Jill and Charlie's school. Got to protect kids from themselves, you know.

The attendance at the dance was disappointing. Only about a third of the kids there were costumed and the numbers seemed lower than at the two dances I'd been to last year. Standing on the sidelines with Chris, Jeff and our other friends, each bragging what we'd do if we got this girl or that one alone. And each afraid one of the girls would take it upon herself to come over and talk to us. There were a lot less Britneys at the dance than had been at the game. I guess they had other things than the dance going on.