Chapter 1

Sara

Jeremy went on business trips three or four times a month, usually flying. But sometimes his destinations were close enough so that he could drive. They were usually short trips, maybe a hundred miles each way, so he would be gone and home again in two days.

But not this time. He had been gone for three days without even calling me. I have two young kids and a Lab dog, but I'm still scared of being alone.

"Dad," I said. "Jeremy hasn't returned. He was on an overnight trip and it's been three days!"

I didn't call my dad that often. He doesn't live far away, but we just don't talk that much. He and my mom split many years ago. I guess I sort of hung out more with my mother than my dad after the split, but she died just a year ago. My dad lives alone and doesn't have any significant other. Once in while I ask him to watch Jeremy Jr. and Michelle.

"Are you ok being alone?" he asked. Of course I spend many days alone, but what sustains me are when Jeremy calls, and knowing that he will be home soon.

"I'm scared that something terrible happened to him, Dad!" I answered. And started crying.

"I'll stay with you for awhile," he said. "OK?"

"Ok!" I blurted out between tears.

When he arrived, I greeted him. I don't often hug him, but this time I did, and immediately started crying, literally, on his shoulder.

"Do you think he got in an accident?" Dad asked. "Maybe his car is in a ravine somewhere! he could be hurt, or more!"

My father has never been crazy about my huband, but I knew he wa genuitely concerned about him now.

After three months, I still hadn't heard a word from Jeremy.

My Dad moved in with us. The kids are crazy about him, he's there when they come home from school, and he's helping me out with the mortgage and bills. He owned a small condo, and checked on it once in awhile. Of course I told the police about Jeremy, thinking foul play had been involved.

We have a finished basement, which we converted into a guest room, and that's where Dad stayed. One night, actually past Midnight,

I went downstairs to check on him. The kids were upstairs, asleep. I could see the light flashes under the door, and so I knew he was watching television. I knocked, softly, thinking he might have fallen asleep. The flashing lights went out.

"Come in" he called softly.

"Hey Sara!" he said. "You ok?"

He was propped up on pillows in his bed, shirtless, but wearing pajama shorts. My dad is sixty, but could easily pass for a man in his forties. He works out regularly and is tall, lean and muscular. When people see us together, they know I am his girl. I think the reason I rarely hug him is that when we're alone, I sorta get vibrations, like... well like he's looking at me in an... unfatherly way.

And it has made me a bit uncomfortable and uneasy, especially since we hadn't been all that close.

My dad could tell that I had been crying. I had taken a late shower and was wearing a bathrobe. A brief glint in his eye told me he liked how I looked.

"What's wrong, baby?" he asked, reaching out for me. I can't remember the last time I did this, but I moved into his reaching arms.

"I know," he said, "It's been three months!"

"Dad," I answered softly, "there's something I never told you. When the police asked me about Jeremy, one question

they asked was " do you think he might have been seeing someone else?"

"I told him I had found out from a friend that Jeremy was secretly getting involved with..."

Now I was trembling real hard.

"Do you know who she was?" my dad asked.

"Dad!" I cried, "it was another guy! A man!"

"Jeremy is gay?" my dad exclaimed.

"Dad," I replied, "I suspected it for a long time. After the Jeremy and Michelle were born, he rarely showed any interest in me sexually. And he would get mysterious calls from guys now and then. But I loved him... still love him... and needed his support!"

" Jeremy is gay!" dad repeated.

"Yes!" I cried.

He was hugging me tighter now. Almost hurting. And I was sobbing more.

"And you think he went off with his lover!"

"I know he did, Dad. And that's why the police backed off. They did their own investigating.

"Have they found him? "

"No!," I said. "And if he's never gonna come back, I need financial help from him!"

It was right about then that I noticed my father was getting hard.

I backed up just a bit and asked him what he was watching on TV.

"A movie I copied from HBO," he said quietly.

"I'll watch it with you," I suggested. "I can't sleep!"

"Uh, I don't think you would want to watch this with me!" he said. "we can watch something else."

"Why not?"

"It's uh sort of R-rated,"he gulped.

"Alot of sex and nudity!"

Now I gulped.

"I'll watch it with you!," I suggested bravely.

My father's face reddened.

"Is it 'straight'?" I asked.

"Of course," he answered.

"Then let's watch it!" I told him. "I'm not a kid. I'm 32, you know!"

And so he turned the TV back on. Right into a hot and heavy love scene.

There were no chairs in his bedroom, so I had no choice but to prop myself next to him on one of his pillows. I can't explain why.

We watched the unedited "Lolita Revisited" for about ten minutes, when I started crying again.

Humbert Humbert was fucking a very young girl.

"Aw, honey!" my dad said, turning into me.

He held my head and drew it to his.

We have the exact same eyes! Very dark, almond shaped, and mediterranen. My dad is of Italian descent.

And very sensual.

But it was me who moved my lips into his. Again, I can't explain why.

It wasn't a smoldering kiss of passion.

More of a thank- you- dad- for- being- here- kiss. Sweet and innocent. But he knew I wasn't wearing anything under the robe because my heaving breasts were about to burst out.

As I backed away from his lips, he followed me. And in a moment his mouth was all over mine, consuming me.

"Uhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! Uhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! No Dad!!!!!!!!!!"

I whimpered his hand slipped under my robe, his fingers gently tweeking my left nipple. My nipples become huge when aroused!