Chapter 1: Ashley Returns

Ashley Wilson carried her martini to her uncovered rear deck to marvel at the vivid yellow sun seeking the Pacific horizon. Sunset falling through the spectrum of yellow to orange to purple and finally to gray. Relieved and happy, she had just finished a frustrating three-hour conference call with her volunteer board of directors. My God! I didn't think that call would ever end. Are they always that disorganized?

As the awesome spectacle of Southern California's Morro Bay framed the sunset, her thoughts returned to tomorrow's trip to her alma mater. She looked forward to partying with her friends. As the sunset turned from purple to gray in the fog, a similar dark cloud returned to haunt her. What will I say to him? How can I get out of this dreadful feeling of guilt? What if he doesn't come?

The flight to Atlanta was pleasantly uneventful. Her rental car was waiting for the hour's drive to the campus. Then she had to check into the hotel, dress, and be at the reception by seven. Plenty of time. Do I just apologize sincerely? You can't change from a slut to a lady with a simple apology, Ashley.

After a quick check in the visor mirror, she was satisfied and walked briskly across the campus parking lot to her triennial departmental reunion. She looked smartly professional in her royal blue suit with matching calfskin shoes, shoulder strap purse, and a paisley silk blouse that revealed enticing cleavage. Her brown hair was cut to frame her face and her luscious red lips. Even so, she still was apprehensive about that part of her mission. What if he doesn't come?

Every three years, graduates return in the spring for a reunion and celebration of their lives. Most other departments don't do this, but it has been a long tradition in Ashley's.

Upstairs, Bill Anderson worked frenetically to submit a research paper before the deadline. Suddenly, the department chair rapped on his door and said, "It's time for the reception, Bill."

"OK, Valerie, I will be there shortly."

These events usually bored him, but given his state of hunger, he was glad to go. The food looked good. The hospitality committee planned well. Sushi. Sashimi. Pinot Grigio. Many other tasty treats. Fifty or 60 graduates made a good turnout. The conversations and wine were planned for two hours.

Ashley saw him come in. With rising trepidation and the unsettled feeling in her stomach, her hand shook as she carefully lined up her sushi and sashimi portions with her chopsticks, and, putting the wasabi and ginger portions in the center of the plate, she was satisfied with her food art. He did come! Yes, you haven't seen him in years and you can barely hold your plate. She was relieved that he came, but dreadfully uneasy about his effect on her, and her ability to settle her issue.

She joined a group of happy alums catching up with each other's lives. Kim's eyes bulged as she said to the group, "My God, there's Erika. I didn't think she would ever show her face around here again!"

Then Kim said to Ashley, "You missed the big one last time. Erika came here on sabbatical and had this torrid affair with Dr. Anderson. They lived together for a semester, and then she told him that she had a husband in Germany. Talk about soap opera. He threw her out. She told him she was going home to get a divorce. Then, I heard that she was coming back to reunite with him. That woman has some gall!"

Ashley felt a chill run through her. She had no claim on him, but she had come here to remedy that. The very thought of that blond hair on his pillow brought on sharp jealousy. Now the blond beauty moved close to him and started an animated conversation.

After a chat, Anderson moved away from Erika to the buffet. He saw Ashley. Why does she affect me like that? Stunning in her business suit, a strand of pearls, pearl anklet, and tiny pearls in her earrings. She stood alone, but how could he approach her in his nervous state.

Ashley saw her chance. Do it now! She refreshed her wine and went to him and looked at him admiringly. She cocked her head making her pendant earring go perpendicular and smiled warmly, "... member me? I was in your classes, Dr. Anderson." She was into her wine.

He dissolved into her deep blue eyes, then stammered, "You're old enough to call me Bill." Then he smiled broadly, "No normal man could ever forget you, Ashley Wilson. Is it still Wilson?"

She was startled by the surprise compliment. "Wow! Thank you. I didn't think you ever noticed. It's still Wilson."

"I noticed you in every class. You are dramatically beautiful and your thesis won a prize. What else is there?"

"But I could never get your attention. That doesn't do much for a girl's self image." The wine must have brought that out.

Anderson blushed. "Oh, you had my attention. It was an ethics violation for me to ask you out while you were in my classes. I ogled you. I think about you often."

Did he really say that? Again surprised, "You do? Dance with me tomorrow night?"

"My great pleasure! Where are you working now?"

"Thanks to your coaching, I am effectively self employed. I do training services, mostly on the Internet. My father died last year and left me our house near San Luis Obispo. It has a glorious view of Morro Bay and the big rock. I live there and work from home. I have more work than I want to do and I still fit in my volunteer work."

"Sounds ideal."

"I would have preferred to keep him around. I loved him. We talked. He gave me a big ear or advice, whatever I wanted."

"I'm sorry to hear that someone his age had to go. He taught at Cal Poly as I remember."

"Yes. A month before he died, he asked me for advice about his girl friend. Given that I was a lot closer to her age, I think I helped. He made me feel valued. Living alone in my childhood home without parents is a little eerie sometimes."

"How did it happen?"

She replied sadly, "Old macho thought he could work all night in his lab with that girl friend, and then drive all the way to Tahoe. He almost made it, but fell asleep at the wheel and tumbled down the snowy mountain by Donner Lake. God knows how she survived without injury, but he didn't. I miss him."

"You live alone?"

"I get a little misty when I talk about him. I will tell you later." I can't let him just mingle. "Get something to eat. I need to fill my plate. There is a corner table empty over there."

They ate side-by-side. She looked at him for a moment, took a deep breath looking away, and then spoke softly, "This is awkward for me, but I must come clean. I became seriously infatuated when I met with you to discuss whether to go for the Master's program. You spent an hour and a half in details and answered all of my questions with respect in your soft low voice. I felt that you were on my side. You seemed totally honest, which is rare in professors. You listened to my concerns." Then, feeling relieved, she gazed at him. "I left your office wanting much more from you than academic advice."

"I remember well. I didn't want you to leave. I was nervous and much taken with you. I didn't know what to do or say next."

She was encouraged by his confession. Just then, Ashley noticed Erika's eyes fixed on her. She placed her hand on his forearm to hold him, and then she fed him a bite off her plate with her chopsticks. He smiled and enjoyed it. Making certain that Erika was still watching, Ashley held his hand as she fed him another bite. Then, she kissed him softly on the cheek and whispered, "Thank you for the nicest compliment I ever received."

Obviously shaken, Anderson said weakly, "It's easy when you tell the truth. Uhh, I guess we'd better mingle before we start gossip!" She rejoined her group and he slipped back to his office to beat the looming deadline. Just as he emailed the paper and completed the task, someone knocked. Valerie? Oh, God, not Erika.

He opened the door guarding the small opening and was relieved as Ashley came in and closed the door. He sat on the edge of his desk no more than two feet from her as she leaned on the door and took a sip of wine. She looked directly into his eyes, "Before I go to the party, I want you to tell me the truth. Do you think about me?"

"Time and again. Some days I don't until I'm ready to sleep. You missed the last reunion. Kim said you were engaged. I was jealous. I figured you were married by now."

Isn't he full of surprises tonight! "I will kill her. She did not tell me that you asked about me, but she did tell me about Erika. I would have called you. I was going through a breakup." She paused, pondered, and then blurted, "Did you sleep with Kim?"

"You'll have to ask her. Had you come, you would have had the chance to turn down my invitation to dinner and the dance. If I had known then what I know now, I would have chanced seeing you after the picnic."

She paused, and then asked uncertainly, "Is the dinner invitation still available?"

"Absolutely! Please sit with me."

She smiled broadly. "Bill?" She moved toward him as he put his arms out for her and she drew closer. They had deep eye contact, which led to a long passionate kiss.

She whispered, "I really want to be with you tomorrow night. " She felt the tears welling and quickly left to go back toward the reception. That was some kiss. I wonder if there are more. But, you didn't address the big issue.

She went to the ladies room to fix her eyes and looked in the mirror. Why do you still want him after all this time? Is it just because you couldn't have him back then? What are you trying to prove? Oh, what the hell. Might as well go for the jackpot. Then, she went back to knock on his door again. When he opened it, she smiled warmly, "Will you come with me to the party? It is at a private clubhouse with a DJ, food, and drink, and other faculty members will be there."

"Only if you are my date. I don't do those things well alone."

"I won't let you out of my sight!" What a relief!

He drove her to a large apartment complex and located the well-appointed party room. They found a group to join. Lots of laughs and good stories about peoples' lives. The music started with loud fast numbers and most people were dancing, including Bill and Ashley. After an hour the DJ played softer and more romantic tunes that gave him an excuse to hold her closer and for Ashley to nestle her head on his shoulder.

Surely, there will be an intermission soon and I can get rid of this burden.