Chapter 3

(15 years earlier)

Not sure he was up to reliving it, Glen still could not refuse his little sister. She was certainly old enough to know about the problems of love. "I don't think I can talk about it unless I have a beautiful woman in my arms."

With an honest tone of disappointment, Ellie told him. "Oh, sorry. I'll go see if Mom will stay with you." She was actually starting to get up when he pulled her over on top of himself. The two had always been close and affectionate, but this was a new level of body contact, particularly so scantily clad. Glen typically slept in just some cut off sweats.

In the darkness, Glen could not see his sister's face, but could sense her wide-eyed amazement at having her chest plastered against his side with his arm around her. "I'm sorry, Babe. Does this make you uncomfortable?"

There was a long pause before Ellie responded. "No, um... I'm... a... maybe too comfortable." As she felt him ease his grip on her, she decided she wanted this kind of comfort and wriggled herself into him. "Hug!" she told him. When he did, she boldly threw her leg over his, her pussy now pressed firmly against his hip.

Waiting a few minutes to enjoy the closeness and to compose himself for the trauma, he told his sister everything, answering many questions along the way. He could not avoid tears, and she joined with him. She was a little surprised but enormously pleased at the more intimate revelations, and her love for her brother swelled along with her sympathy.

The siblings lay quietly for many minutes after the talking and the tears ended. Ellie thought he had fallen asleep when he piped up, "Ellie, is this a good time for an 'I told you so?'" The fact that he was awake surprised her, but his calling her 'Ellie' surprised her even more.

"Wh... what do you mean?"

"Well, remember when I first started calling you 'Babe'?"

"Sure! God, I was a gawky freak then."

"Remember why I called you 'Babe'?"

"You, uh, said someday I would be a gorgeous babe just like Mom."

"Right. I told you so!"

At a loss for words only for a moment, she gave him a light swat and protested "Flatterer! You're just saying that 'cuz you've got me half naked in bed with you!" She was glad he could not see her grin. She did not realize she was grinning so hard he could hear it.

"Not at all," he told her. "Look in the mirror much? Tell me what you see."

"Gle-en! That's embarrassing!" She was almost beside herself with excitement, but she certainly could not let on to him.

"Seriously. Start with your face. What do you see?" he urged her.

This put a little damper on her excitement, because she was not happy with her face. "Well, it sure isn't any movie star's face," she said rather glumly.

"Ever smile at yourself in the mirror," he demanded.

"Uh, I don't think so. I'm usually not that happy with what I see."

"Well, try it some time. You won't need any other lights on in the room." That produced a little giggle from her. "Seriously, Babe, you've got a beautiful face, and a killer smile. Be sure to use that smile a lot." His last comment took away the momentary glum feeling. "OK. Tell me about your neck."

The conversation continued for quite a while, with Glen asking for her detailed impressions of each body part. He worked through neck, shoulders, arms, hands, feet, legs, and tummy - all the publicly visible parts. He would not let her gloss over anything, usually getting her to admit that each part was attractive and sexy. As they traversed her anatomy, Ellie was getting excited and a little fearful about the private parts. Surely he wouldn't ask about them, would he?

He certainly would. "OK, Babe. How about your butt? What do you think of it? Are you happy with it?" By the time he had convinced her how sexy her butt was, she was almost bouncing up and down waiting for the next part.

"Well, not too many parts left, are there, Babe? Are you starting to believe my 'I told you so, ' now? Course the best parts of all are still to come, aren't they. What do you see when you look at your boobs in the mirror?"

She knew it was coming, and actually wanted it to, but she felt obligated to feign indignation, which she did. He was undeterred. "I've got to admit, I've spent a lot of time looking at them, Babe, and I am really impressed. 37 C, or maybe D are they?" She was unable to squeak out an answer. "Tell me about the nipples. I never had a chance to see them. Are they light or dark. Do they turn up a little or not. I guess that's not common on boobs as big as yours, huh? How long are they when they're stiff." He was laying it on for all he was worth, now.

"God, Glen, all these questions! Why don't I just take off my shirt and show you?"

Softening his tone to one of sincerity and reverence, he told her "Ellie, Babe, if you ever chose to show me, it would be a wonderful gift, and I would be honored." Both were quiet for a moment before he totally changed the mood again. "I guess that only leaves your pussy."

"Gle-en! Please! Not until you tell me about your c..." She froze before she finished the word. "You sneak! I thought I was here to comfort you. You're not heartbroken, you're just a pervert." She tried to sound angry, but her heart wasn't in it.

"Ellie, Ellie. You can't imagine how much your being here has helped me. My heart really is broken. But it's also full of love for my wonderful sister. The one beautiful thing you can't see in the mirror is your heart, and it's beautiful just like Mom's. I just want to be sure you realize how beautiful you are all over."

Of course, there was no way Ellie could hold off tears after such an emotional exchange, and she didn't really try very hard. After thoroughly watering his shoulder, she finally murmured "Why did you have to be my brother?"

"I know just how you feel, Babe. Please tell me your feelings for me haven't kept you away from other guys."

"No, not really. 'Course it hasn't been a problem 'cause the guys aren't showing a lot of interest."

"Are you doing everything you can to get them interested?" he asked gently.

"Um, maybe not," she admitted.

"Well, we need to talk about baiting the man trap better. You've got some awesome bait there, and once you get serious, the guys won't have a chance."

"You really mean that, don't you?" Ellie asked. "God, I love you!" She blurted out as she burrowed into him as hard as she could.

"I love you, too, Babe, and thanks for being with me tonight. Um, one other thing. Maybe you were joking about my cock, but if you're ever curious about anything, don't be afraid to ask. I mean anything, OK?"

"Thanks. Sometimes I feel pretty naive. Guess we'd better get to sleep, huh?"

Ellie suffered the same fate as her mother had the night before. Neither sibling had enjoyed much restful sleep by time they had to get up. For Ellie, at least the high from their intimate conversation was enough to carry her through the day. For Glen, he would be running on sheer nerve even if he had been blessed with good sleep.

Terrible as was Glen's grief, he at least had a loving family who did everything they could to support and assist him. Julie had no such advantages.

Later, Julie could not remember how she made it through the rest of Sunday and Sunday night. Monday morning, both parents attempted to get her to let them in, citing her need to go to school, and promising to help with whatever her problem was. Her only response through it all was to tell them to go away.

Whatever else they were, the Menconis were not stingy, and Julie's room was well-equipped, having a stereo, TV, and private phone line. Except for food, for which she as yet had no desire, there was no real need to leave her room. All day Monday, she found some way to pass the agonizing hours. Twice more, she retched into the toilet with nothing left to throw up. Afterward, she huddled in her bed until the shakes passed.

What Julie needed more than anything was a friend, some one to whom she could tell everything. Lately, that had been Glen, but Candy was still like her substitute sister. Julie could hardly wait until Candy got home from school so she could call her. She felt like she was bursting from the pent-up despair, with no outlet for it.

Julie did not have to call, because Candy beat her to it. "Hey, Jules! Where were you today? And what's wrong with Glen? He looks like shit?" That threw Julie into a paroxysm of sobbing and another retching bout, all while Candy waited on the line, frightened for her friend. While still quivering under the covers, Julie began spilling the whole story to her friend. She left out the encounter in the kitchen, something she decided no one else should ever know about.

Candy was one of only three friends who knew anything about Julie's home life and her monumental temper. While still amazed, Candy could at least believe what had happened. There was nothing she could do about Julie's plight, but she could and did listen. For nearly two hours, much of it spent in wordless tears, Julie exposed her anguish to her sympathetic friend.

"Candy, I don't know what I'm going to do. Everything is ruined. I can't stand to see my folks, but there's nowhere else I can go. I think the only answer is to end it all."

"Julie! Julie! Don't even think that. Come and live with me! We'll really be sisters, then."

"How can I do that? What about your parents?"

"They love you, you know that. It'll work, believe me. Tell you what. You get everything packed. When you see a chance to get away, just call me. I mean it. Will you do it?"

A goal, something to work toward, is as good as anything to blunt the pangs of grief. The chance to get away temporarily brought Julie out of her semi-aware state. "I... I'll get ready," she assured Candy as they finally ended the call.

Concerned that her mother might hear the sounds of packing, Julie did nothing about it until well after they went to bed. During the evening, both parents had tried several more times to talk to her, but she still said no more than 'Go away.'

Packing turned out to be a blessing, because attempts to sleep brought torment. She would start to drift off, and images of Glen's stricken face as she screamed at him would jar her awake. Other times, it was him emptying his stomach at the curb. Still other times, she would drift off to sleep to dream endlessly of forever chasing after his disappearing car.

There was surprisingly little for Julie to pack. She had a fairly full closet of good quality clothes, only a small portion of which she actually wore. Theresa had, of course, tightly controlled her daughter's clothes purchases, and her choices were generally embarrassing to a contemporary teen.

Ever since starting High School, Julie had been within walking distance of school, and Candy's home was on the way. The two girls were the same size. Candy graciously shared her much less extensive wardrobe, and Julie added what little she could manage to buy on her own to the common pool. Julie would wear her own clothes- her mother's, as she thought of them - to Candy's house, then change before heading to school. For some reason, Theresa had not caught on to how few clothes Julie had acquired over the past four years.

When Candy's mother first became aware of the daily clothing exchange, she had been faced with a moral dilemma. She did not like the idea of assisting with the deception of a fellow mother. On the other hand, she had never met Theresa and loved Julie like an extra daughter. Julie had actually inspired her own Candy to levels of tidiness she had never expected, and Candy's grades were by far the best of any of her children. Many times, Julie had wept out her pent-up frustration on her shoulder or her husband's.

Candy's mother had to admit that the clothes Julie wore to their house were more appropriate for her than for her daughter. It took several bedroom discussions, but both of Candy's parents agreed that their best role was as a true refuge for Julie. Thereafter, they helped as much as they could with the clothes and anything else Julie wanted kept secret from Vince and Theresa.

The nice set of luggage that Julie had used only three times was unfortunately not in her room. She would have to sneak down into the house to get it. Planning how to get her luggage led her to think about food. Though the thought almost made her ill, she knew she could not go on indefinitely without it. She decided to go foraging after her parents were asleep. The master bedroom was on the main floor, and she would not need to go too near their room. The stairway had the usual squeaky places, but she knew them all. She would make it work.

From the time she heard her parents retire until after 2am, Julie busied herself with selecting the few clothes she would take, and sorting through her non-clothes possessions. While arranging her cosmetics, she suffered another bout of crying when she came to her birth control pills. Her period was just underway, which was good because she probably would have forgotten to take one that day. Although she could not envision any future need for them, they had become a well-ingrained habit, and she set the container and two months of backup supply with the things she would pack.

In the wee hours, when she was as sure about her parents being asleep as she would ever be, Julie set out to forage. Actually smiling slightly when she thought of it, she stripped before heading off, but put on tennis shoes for the bare basement storage room floor. She thought that if she happened to encounter her father, his shock at her nakedness would give her a chance to flee back to her room. There was just a slight tickle from the string of the tampon brushing her upper thigh as she moved.

Knowing that she was taking a chance, she went immediately down the short hall to the master bedroom after reaching the main floor. She stood motionless with her ear against the closed door for several minutes, but heard nothing to indicate wakefulness. The nighttime air made her bare flesh uncomfortable, but she pushed the feelings from her mind.

After easing down the stairs to the basement, she felt it safe to turn on a light for the first time. In the storage room, she found her luggage. She also came across some large plastic storage bags and a picnic cooler, which she set out. She went through the storage room and a couple of downstairs closets looking for other possessions she might want to take.

Since talking to Candy, Julie had convinced herself that she would be moving out for good. She had no idea how she would exist, but the need to get away overpowered any other concern at the time. Her friends would help her all they could, and the Vosses - suddenly, she was in tears again. Thinking of safety and refuge brought up images of Glen and his family, and the scope of her loss overwhelmed her. She sat huddled on the cooler for several minutes, trying to get her emotions under control.

It took three cautious trips to get the luggage and a few other items up to her room. She went back once more and brought the cooler to the kitchen. Taking a huge chance with noise, she very, very slowly filled the bottom of it with ice cubes. Then, she put in some soft drinks and put some orange juice and milk in plastic containers. She found some apples and bananas, and grabbed a box of cereal, some chips, and some cookies. Looking at her haul, she had the sense to go back to the refrigerator and take some cold cuts for a little protein.

After two more rather nervous trips, Julie had completed her foraging, and got busy packing. She was very tired, but actually welcomed the escape from troubling sleep. Nibbling uncertainly at her food supply as she worked, she packed and arranged until daylight started to illuminate the room. Then she stopped, not wanting her folks to suspect what she was planning.

Forcing herself to eat some cereal and milk first, Julie collapsed in bed, and actually fell asleep in the the watery dawn light. Perhaps an hour and a half later, her still-futile chase after Glen's car was interrupted by her mother pounding on the door. As she struggled awake, the horror of her situation again overcame her, and she raced her rising nausea to the bathroom.

In the hall, Theresa heard her daughter retching, and was struck by her own horror. "Oh God? Julie! Are you pregnant!? Oh, no! Oh, no! Please tell me you're not pregnant! Julieeeee!" Theresa's pleas trailed off into sobs.

Julie was struck by her mother's tears and the evidence of her genuine alarm. It was a reaction she was not at all used to. Authoritative and controlling was the demeanor Julie almost always encountered, and Theresa's obvious anguish was a revelation. Even through her own discomfort she was moved by it. Of course, it would not do to let on that she was not pregnant, so Julie just gasped out her standard 'go away' response.

Tuesday was a very long day for Julie. Her mother only left the house twice, and not for very long. As she heard the car leave each time, she resumed her packing, trying to get ready for a rapid exit. Theresa's first act upon returning was to check on Julie, each time pleading to know if Julie was pregnant. Julie, of course, gave only the same 'go away.'

During the times when she could not pack, Julie thought about her mother's paranoia with possible pregnancy. It was not something she had ever considered. She had never slipped up in over a year on the pill. Pregnancy was to her, like to most teens, the biggest bogeyman of all.

The fact that her possible pregnancy caused her mother near hysteria made Julie start thinking of it in a new light. Initially, it's possible value as a tactic lay in the effect it would have on her mother. Then, she began to see other advantages.

All the while she was packing, Julie was troubled by the long-range implications. She was a thoughtful, careful person by nature, but she was about to take the most impetuous action of her life. Candy's family could not take her in permanently. How long could she stay without being a burden? Where would she go from there? Could she find a job? Was there a girl she could room with?

As she thought about possibilities, Julie realized with a start that college had not even entered her thinking when wondering where she would live. Of course, her mother's fear of her pregnancy centered around the impact it would have on future plans, primarily college. If college was a reason to avoid pregnancy and she was not going to her parents' college no matter what and there was nowhere else to go, then...

What if she was living with Glen? What if they were a family - married? That had been her ideal future ever since they had started dating. What if it was now? If she was pregnant with Glen's baby, there was no doubt he would marry her. The idyllic vision conjured up by that scenario was shattered rather quickly by the realization that she had ruined any chance of Glen impregnating her. She had probably ruined any chance of him even talking to her. She had been half asleep while musing, but a new wave of nausea had her on her feet rushing for the toilet once again.

When she was back in bed, shaky from her throes, Julie fantasized about getting married to Glen. It struck her that he was her only hope - her only chance of escape from home and from loneliness. But he was no hope now that she had destroyed their relationship. This time, she avoided the nausea, but uncontrolled sobbing made up for it. She heard her mother once, outside her door, but she could not stifle her crying, and Theresa must have decided it was useless to try any more.

Theresa did try at suppertime, offering to leave a tray outside Julie's door. This time, Julie added a resounding 'No' to her usual rebuff. Not long afterward, both parents left in the car together. There was no way of knowing how long they might be gone, but she dove for the phone and called Candy. Within ten minutes, Candy and her parents were there with two cars and a younger brother to help.

Everyone sprinted in and out of the house, anxious to avoid any chance of Vince and Theresa returning while they were emptying Julie's room. The cars were packed with as much as they could hold in less then forty-five minutes, and there was nothing of significance left. Julie sent the parents and brother off with the load while she went back in to straighten her room. Candy stayed with her, mystified why her friend would risk discovery just to leave her room pristine for the last time. While Julie made the bed, Candy looked in the closet and saw the Prom dress hanging, and the matching shoes still on the rack. As gently as possible, she rolled them up and covered them with the light jacket she had worn. Being slinky, the dress took up very little space.

Just as Julie was taking a last look back at her long-time sanctuary, they heard a car pull up. They dashed down the stairs and waited by the front door until they were sure the car was in the garage, then slipped out. Julie even managed a little giggle as they made their escape down the block. She had planned to write a short note, but had run out of time. The familiar walk to Candy's house took only a few minutes. She had no way of knowing her parents had just returned from Glen's.