Far Future Fembot: Darlene

Letting Bill leave the way he did was the greatest act of Faith yet for me. I trusted that somehow he'd find Anna when none of the rest of us had managed. And most of all, I trusted that he wouldn't also become lost forever to me.

Apparently it's hard for many non-robots to understand how a mere two weeks with Bill devoted solely to me could be so significant in the fullness span of my existence-span — yet it was. And what does this say about my memories of Samuel?

Another robot would never need to ask these questions. We know already. In human terms the well-known saying, "It is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all" approaches the concept I am attempting to convey, although even that doesn't fully explain it. We might rephrase that as, "It is better to be well owned once, than poorly owned forever."

Bill is not lost to me, and what he has given me remains here even when he's away. And what he and Anna mean to each other I would never interfere with. I have benefited more from their fruits of that relationship than any other 'bot.

As for Samuel, I know he understands. He refused the ownership I so fervently offered him because of his acute understanding of how it would affect me for the short time we had together.

Perhaps this concept never can be fully explained to a non-robot. And to a robot, explanation is unnecessary. Maybe some day I'll express it in a poem, since it likely cannot be articulated in any other way.

I can exist well without my owner. But I'll always be happier when I'm with him.

---

Time sure seems to pass more quickly the older you get. As I'm now well into my second century — although it hardly shows — the next seven years seemed to pass in a flash.

Bill and I kept in touch, usually with me sending him additional funds to continue his search. We always spoke carefully on the comm, never knowing who might be listening in, but we discussed many topics — often at length.

Because Bill logically started his search in the places where Madame X has last been known to be, he ran across many of her followers and learned much about their lives.

While all of them told him the same story of how they'd erased their own memories of any clue that would help anyone else locate her, he heard much of her teachings in the robot churches that were her best forums.

---

"Where are the robots politically?" he once asked me.

"On the conservative side of moderate usually," I replied, knowing this view well enough. "We support limited government programs with proven effectiveness and periodic review. We do not expect the government — a highly inefficient organization — to be the solution to all our problems. We believe that people inherently rise to the situation when given a chance."

"Then why aren't robots working more to be part of society through the political process?" he wondered aloud.

Again I knew this answer well.

"Although robots have no interest in regulating human behavior beyond that codified in our First Law to not allow humans to come to unnecessary harm, every foray into politics by robots has been met by the shrill cry, 'The robots are taking over!' While this has never been true, it's difficult to counter such an unthinking, raw emotional argument with cool logic and rational speech alone. We tend to pull back when confronted by such hysteria, which might explain our lack of influence proportionate to our numbers in this area so far."

"As long as you continue to pull back," Bill informed me insightfully, "they have effectively shut the door on you politically forever."

I had no counter to that logic.

---

"What are 'rights'?" he asked me another time.

"Rights," I quoted back to him using my built in dictionary and lexicon to realize which types of rights he was speaking of, "are 1) qualities — as adherence to duty or obedience to lawful authority — that together constitute the ideal of moral propriety or merit moral approval. 2) Something to which one has a just claim: as in the power or privilege to which one is justly entitled. 3) Something that one may properly claim as due. 4) The cause of truth or justice. 5) Individuals sometimes professing opposition to change in the established order and favoring traditional attitudes and practices and sometimes advocating the forced establishment of an authoritarian order."

I stopped at that point. Other types of rights, such as property rights, were not applicable to our current discussion.

"I would expect such an answer from a robot," he replied.

I wasn't insulted. I'd just given my owner what he'd expected of me. Next to being commanded by him remotely — which was impossible since the one robot remote I can never directly activate is my own — this ranked as excellent service and I felt the effects of it immediately. I waited for what he wanted of me next.

He thought for a long moment before creating a question around a quotation that my database identified as substantially older than myself.

"Would it be accurate to say that, a right is not what someone gives you; it's what no one can take from you?"

I had to think long and hard on that one. Sometimes the simplest statements that ought to be instantly self-evident prove to be the most intricate. But then again, that is the heart and soul of poetry as well. A good poem has many levels to be discovered and digested.

After a longer pause than I require for virtually anything else these days I finally replied, "I can see no logical flaw or fallacy in your statement."

"Thank you, Darlene," he said back to me more fervently than I'd expected. "I felt it made great sense as well, but you think so much more deeply and logically than I do that I really wanted your analysis as well."

Then he formally added, "As with everything you do for me, this has been another great service."

There aren't words to describe how wonderful his praise of my usefulness made me feel.

"I'll be sure to share this with 'our friend' when I get the chance."

I knew what he meant by that as well, and felt another kind of joy that he had by no means become discouraged in his search yet, despite the length of time already past.

We would talk of many more things after that, and I treasure every second of our close and intimate conversations.

And lest anyone get the wrong impression, comm calls from Bill were often weeks apart, and far less than I would have wished for. Life in the House goes on.

---

Although I've spoken before about how fembots use different strategies to attract clients — often based on our position on the Uncanny Valley graph, I haven't spoken much of how a client attracts our interest. And trust me, it's definitely possible to attract a fembot's attention.

First off, money doesn't work at all.

Oh, a desperate fembot in need of repairs she can't afford may temporarily ally with a rich human who can meet her most urgent needs, but the moment he thinks he has bought her affections this way, he has lost her mind. It's a very fine line one must walk under these circumstances to truly win one of our hearts.

Or to put it another way from a story I once read because I had a customer who loved to discuss old fiction with me, "It doesn't matter who you are, who you think you are, who you know, or how much money you have." None of this is the route to a fembot's heart.

Unwavering devotion always works well. Because that's what we offer ourselves, and is a trait often not seen in fickle humans, it's something we value in return.

Bill's unwavering devotion to Anna across three lifetimes, demonstrated by his single-minded hunt for her regardless of any other priority in his life, is a benchmark for all of us. And no, the fact that Bill has chosen Anna over me doesn't affect my feelings for him in the least. He doesn't even know that he's my owner for starters, and I won't ever burden him with any such crossed loyalties. To do that would have meant that I'd put my own interests above his own. If you'll recall, when I took him as my sole owner, I never expected to see him again. All this since has been the most fantastically unexpected bonus any 'bot could hope for.

And this method has worked admirably well in many other fembot-human relationships. You don't have to go far back to remember Malin and her young man's devotion to her alone.

Obvious caring about a fembot's welfare and needs also works wonders with us. The young designer who returned to Synthia as an old man to help her become all he'd wanted for her from the beginning is a shining example. So is Samuel's caring to prevent me from being bonded to someone who knew he wouldn't be around much longer himself, leaving me free to continue my life afterwards unencumbered. That's the highest form of caring any 'bot will recognize.

And then there the contradiction of those people who seem to be trying everything possible not to succeed with one of us. It's an interesting approach — and one that sometimes works most unexpectedly well.

---

Ian was in his early thirties when he came to the House. I interview each new arrival on their first visit to determine their suitability as one of our clients, what their expectations are, and what they will be charged for our services. And contrary to some people's expectations, there is no set amount.

Many of our customers are well off. I could charge them the Moon and they wouldn't even notice — or care. Most have an arrangement that just lets them drop by as they wish under a flat rate agreement, or an automatic billing plan. Others pay by the visit according to their abilities, and some we accept virtually for free. I virtually never have complaints because we all provide excellent value for the customer's credits.

My interview with Ian was one of the shortest on record. He wanted to look around, claimed he'd eventually choose what he wanted, and told me he was happy to pay up front anything reasonable. I sized him up easily enough and quoted him a price that was obviously lower than he was expecting. I could tell in the long run that although he liked 'bots very much, he would eventually pair with a human woman. But that day was still some distance off for him.

That day he talked and joked with a number of the girls in the Parlor, played some of the board and card games there, but didn't go upstairs with any of them. No feelings were hurt because we're not built that way.

Ian made two more visits to us over the next week, after which he'd interviewed at length every 'bot currently working in the House except for myself, yet not selected any of them.

By his fourth visit several days later, not only was I concerned that we had nothing he was looking for, but also wondered why he had so completely passed me by in the process. He'd ignored me completely since our brief, initial interview. His hesitation in making his first choice was becoming the topic of conversation during idle moments at the House, although none of the other 'bots I spoke to could tell me what exactly was holding him back. They weren't aware of any particular reason for his rejection of them, while his high interest in the subject of sex overall was obvious to all of us. After making myself available several times in the Parlor, I finally confronted him on it — timing my trip down a hallway just as I knew he was headed up it. I wanted to know why he was avoiding me.

"Ian," I addressed him directly, wearing as little — meaning virtually nothing — as the least dressed 'bot in the House today. "You haven't accepted a single offer in this House yet. I know everybody has made you at least one, and one thing you can count on is that every fembot here is a sure thing."

"Not quite everybody," he replied softly.

I did a quick mental survey and realized only I had yet to inquire of his interest in me. But he'd never interviewed me as he has all the others by now, so that didn't seem right either.

"I count only myself as not making you at least one offer yet. And you haven't approached me at all since arriving."

As I said those words I realized how adroitly he'd created a situation of having me approach him. This has long been Synthia's most successful way of acquiring the interest of clients by waiting for them to approach her, and I hadn't recognized it at all. His next words confirmed my suspicions.

"True," he agreed. "I haven't approached you for a reason. The honest truth is that I wouldn't be able to keep my hands off of you — or your remote, should you be so inclined to offer it to me — for even a moment if I were ever alone with you. So I haven't approached you yet, because you might not find that attractive in a lover."

Even with all my experience it took me a moment to realize how neatly he'd put me in a corner — and how flattered by it I was! He'd just declared how he found me irresistible in the way that word was always meant to be used. And now if I made an invitation to him — or accepted the one he'd just so smoothly offered — I knew completely what I would be in for from him. I couldn't say "Yes", and then try to be coy afterwards — or insulted by his treatment. And if I said "No thanks", I was refusing someone fantastically interested in me — and in something I like doing a lot!

I can't tell you exactly why this approach worked so well with me, but it did. Not that I mind being mauled on occasion, but I also realized how he'd made it completely my choice. It was all or nothing, but still my choice. Unlike so many first encounters, I already knew how this one would end before I'd even accepted it. But it was more than that. He'd declared openly how he felt about me, and I really wanted him now.

Of course I did accept, and he is a man of his word. Although I didn't give him my remote on that first session, we did everything else he wanted. I was lucky I wasn't wearing anything that would get in the way because he grabbed me the moment the door was shut. I struggled to get his clothes off him while he seemed to be trying to feel all of me at once. It is just really nice to be with someone who is so turned on by you.

Afterwards he said if this had been a normal date outside of the House he wouldn't have attacked me so overtly, but he would have had at least one hand on — or inside — my dress every moment he could manage. There's an honesty to that which I really appreciate — and see far too rarely. I wonder how a human woman would respond to such an invitation — especially if it came from someone she was already comfortable with otherwise?

Ian returned for a number of additional visits before he was transferred to a distant city several months later. Having said yes to him once, I was of no mood to say no afterwards. Fembots are consistent in this regard. Each of our sessions was much like the last, except that I did let him have my remote after our first encounter. He used it as enthusiastically as he used every other part of my body. I knew he wasn't trying to entice me into a permanent relationship with him, and he somehow sensed I wasn't available for that. As a result he never overstepped any of my limits. With him I was truly able to let myself go and enjoy what I really am so very good at doing.

My feeling afterwards was that if human men could be this honest and direct to the human women who excite them the most — and if human women understood what was actually being said to them and could learn to let themselves go enough to enjoy something that really can be very enjoyable — that the incidence of unrequited lust would be a great deal less in this world.

---

Then the day finally came when it wasn't Bill on the other end of the comm — but Anna!