Chapter 4

I rode my bike as hard as I could. I don't know where I went, I just had to get away. When I finally came to my senses I was out near Lakeside. I looked over into a nearby yard and there was a four year old boy chasing a three year old girl. They were both laughing. He caught up to her and they just stood there hugging each other. The smiles on their faces made it evident how much they loved each other.

And I grew up. I knew I couldn't run away. I had to go back and confront Les. And do whatever I could to make it right.

I spent the ride back coming up with questions. Would Les ever talk to me again? Would I have to explain why I raped my sister to my parents? Would they send me away somewhere? Have me arrested? What if Les was pregnant? Or if I'd caused some kind of damage to her? And most important, how could I do this to my sister?

It started raining the last 15 minutes or so and I was soaked by the time I got home. I put my bike in the garage and went into the kitchen. There was a note on the table from Les saying that Mom, Dad and Jaz were spending the night at our Aunt's house and wouldn't be back till tomorrow afternoon. That meant I had a chance to talk with Les before my parents got home.

I walked upstairs after determining that Les wasn't on the first floor. It felt like I was walking toward the gas chamber but I kept going. Her door was pushed to but not closed and there was a light on in her room. I hadn't realized it was dark.