I fell in love with disco music back in elementary school, and when I started high school I became more and more interested in electronic music, and the community that was subject to that subculture suited me completely. It was a time when the friends at school were divided into ravers and rockers. Back then, I didn’t know anyone who listened to folk music, and even pop music would have been considered poor and backward. But that was once, today’s times are different. During the summer, my cousin from Germany would come and tell me how in Germany there are festivals and parties of all types and subtypes of electronic music, where people consume ecstasy and party day and night.

In the middle of the first half of the nineties when I graduated, as a gift I was permitted to visit our closest relatives in Munich. Damir, my cousin who is three years older than me, took me to a party. After that first party, I was never the same anymore. Anyone who has not experienced such euphoria and freedom in which the mind and body are guided by music and freed from prohibited substances in such harmony and people bring out the best in each other, will not be able to know what I am talking about.

Damir was a smart guy and I will always remember his words: -”Manuel, listen, I know how you feel right now, I know you want to repeat this every weekend, but it doesn’t work that way. If you do this regularly, you will no longer feel this good, and frequent consumption of synthetics can destroy you in a short time. Once or twice a year is okay, but not more often. You see how I also party and don’t take anything, I drink three, five, or ten beers and I get carried away by the music and the atmosphere. Now this has helped you to open that locked part of your mind and that’s it. You are not a peasant who does not understand this kind of entertainment and who needs substances to fit into the atmosphere.”

Since I returned home, I haven’t stopped talking about that event, that music, about the feeling I had, about those people, the girls who are so polite and approachable, the feeling of indescribable happiness that reigns there ... Then I spoke with guys from Zagreb who spend summer time with us on the Island of Krk and there are sometimes such parties in Zagreb as well. After a few weeks, I was invited to come to Zagreb with my friends for one of the rare parties - then they were called rave parties, although the music was not rave, but a mixture of trance and house.

Five of us sat down in my car and headed for Zagreb. Friends welcomed us and soon we came to the club. I can say that apart from some technical elements, there was no significant difference between the German event and this one. The atmosphere was identical: people were also happy and friendly. Yes, there were also famous pills arranged for us by our friends from Zagreb. I watched my friends walking around with a beer in hand looking amazed. It was clear from their faces that they were not yet familiar with anything; it was clear that they were in this kind of place for the first time.

I was standing at the bar and started talking to a girl, while calculating whether I could drink a beer or not, considering that I still had to drive back. I told that girl how I was in Germany for a party, and she told me about her experiences too. Her name turned out to be Ines. We talked so much that for a while I forgot about my friends and then I looked around and to my surprise, I saw them dancing on the podium, which was otherwise unimaginable. A few girls were dancing next to them, but there were no classic pranks where these guys rushed at them, they just danced next to each other without primitive intrusions. I knew exactly what was going on with them. It was clear that they had taken ecstasy.

My hand in my pocket felt for the pill, and then I remembered Damir’s words and decided to stay sober, I gave the pill to Ines, who decided to stay with me at the bar. When it started working, we left the bar. First we went to my friends and danced with them, and then we went to the other corner where her friends were. It didn’t take long for the two societies of opposite sexes to merge. Ines was in euphoria and during the dance we came closer and closer to each other until we started kissing and touching each other. We soon got outside and after a few minutes in the passenger seat of my car, my cock was penetrating her cunt.

We returned to Krk. My friends there were no longer the same. Months passed and they only recounted the events of that evening. The same as I talked about the event from Germany. Over time, more partying began in our area, classic disco clubs started organized parties, but that was no longer so great. There began to be more and more other characters than true fans of electronic music. At first, the dealers who, with the help of their pack dogs, were selling cheap drug junk smelled the opportunity, and then the drug addicts came to parties. Not to mention just how many plainclothes police officers were hanging around there, some honest and some corrupt. In the end, all kinds of characters started coming who had no idea about this subculture, but who have heard that there are a lot of sexy girls who get fucked easily due to the influence of drugs. But that was completely wrong thinking because I know from experience that it is easier to fuck a drunk girl at a pop or folk concert than an urban girl at a dance party.

So we went to such places less and less. We moved around normal places and only 2-3 times a year would we decide to have such a party, and only if it was something exclusive, such as a guest appearance by a world-class DJ.

It was summer. Exactly that time in the evening between bathing and going out. That time when you want to rest, have dinner, get ready to go out, and do a lot of things in a short time. And then something always comes up. That’s how it was now. One by one friends started coming. Admittedly, I was expecting Kiki because he lives in Rijeka and always visits me when he comes to our Island, and the other two were already ready to go out and came to hurry me to get ready. We were sitting in the living room, and my mom Diana brought us beers and would occasionally join in our conversation. There was a house party in Pula over the weekend, and we hadn’t had a party since last summer. We were of two minds whether to go or not.

Mom overheard the conversation and said: “Oh, I would go with you too, I’m interested in how it is at those parties.”

I thought: “Oh no, she is the only thing we don’t need at the party!”

However, my friend Zvone’s tongue works faster than his brain.

Zvone: “Well, come with us, there are exactly 5 of us.”

I tried to answer that crazy idea. Looking at my friends secretly and giving signs of displeasure, I said: - “Well, no, who knows how long we’ll stay there, maybe we’ll go to some after-party...”

Trying to stop it didn’t work and I didn’t even have the support of my friends, so my mom took the opportunity.

Diana: -”Well, it doesn’t matter. I won’t hold you back. I’m interested in how young people are having fun these days.”

I already knew that this party was going to be a bust. They supported her in the idea of going with us, and she thought it was settled. All I could do was roll my eyes.

When she moved away from the living room, I said: “Okay men, are you normal, so what the hell is she going to do to us? Well, she’ll figure it out if we take something, you fucking fools.”

Tino: -”Yes, so what, let her come with us. She’s cool.”

“Maybe she’s cool to you, but not to me. I don’t want her to see me sprawled out there.”

Zvone: -”Well, who says we’re going to fall apart.”

“Well, since we rarely party, we usually get quite messy when we go to such a party.” - I said

Kiki: -”We won’t, just a little booze and that’s it. I intend to grab some pussy.” “You always say that. Ha ha.”

That Saturday came and I was less and less enthusiastic about the idea of taking my mom to a party, but I couldn’t do anything. She was constantly preoccupied with what to wear. She kept changing her decision and informed herself about the dress code at such parties. In the end, she wore a rather interesting creation, and it would all look good if she were a 18-year-old girl, but when a woman 45 years-old puts on a skirt that fails to cover her bum and is made of a material and colour similar to my raincoat, then it doesn’t seem like a very good move. Or is it because it’s about my mom after all? Otherwise, she was well acquainted with the club culture. She always said that in her youth there were many discotheques in the area and that everyone couldn’t wait for the weekend, and the same music was played there as in, Milan or Paris or in Studio 54 in New York. When I saw how happy she was to go with us, my anger eased a little. I realized that now she felt for a moment as if she is from the past or she is 20 years old again. And honestly, she looked like that. On the way to the party, she kept talking about past events, about music, and my friends bombarded her with questions so that we reached Pula sooner than she could say everything she wanted to.

When we went inside, she was impressed by the ambience and even liked the house music. We were at the bar drinking beers. It was the first time in my life that I saw my mother like this at the bar with a beer in her hand. The booze started us off, so often we cut the beer with some shots. Over time, we slowly drifted apart. Everyone was talking to someone else or simply going for a walk to the other side or upstairs. There were a lot of people and it was difficult to visually find someone just like that. I saw a guy that I had known for a long time from previous parties and I went to another bar to drink with him. I used the proven method where I drink until midnight and then tire myself out by dancing so that the alcohol evaporates from my body and I am clear to drive in the morning. And as it usually happens, you step away from the bar a little and bump into someone, talk a little and the time flies by quickly. In such an atmosphere, I completely forgot that my mother was with us. I went around to see what happened to her, but first I ran into Zvone. As soon as I saw him I knew he had taken pills because his pupils were dilated and he was clenching his jaw.

“What the fuck are you doing, my mom will see you.”

Zvone: - “Come on, It is ok, give me five.”

“And where is she?”

Zvone:- “Well, downstairs, she is dancing on the podium.” He pointed towards the main podium and added: “She’s a real party girl.”

I looked towards the podium and saw my mom dancing on the speaker and below her a dozen young partygoers chanting and whistling. She was completely out of her mind. Dressed in a top and that short skirt, she did not give the impression that she was a woman in her forties. Just in case, the security guard stood there calmly and watched so that she wouldn’t fall off the speaker. She jumped, wiggled her butt, performed a sexy dance and I knew right away that she had been given ecstasy.

“Fuck you, you gave it to her, huh? Well, you’re fucking stupid...”

Zvone: -”What are you worried about, all is fine.”

Zvone was in his own head movie and there was no point in communicating with him about it. I headed down towards the podium, but before I got to my mom, I saw Kiki and Tino sitting in the booth with two girls.

As soon as I saw them, I immediately attacked them: “What the hell did you give her? Are you crazy?”

They seemed a little embarrassed. Since due to the loudness of the music, you can only communicate by speaking directly at an ear, I sat down next to Kiki.

Kiki: -”Well, we didn’t offer it, but she said herself that she wanted to try it.”

“Well, you could have said that you don’t have it, that you don’t know anything about it.”

Kiki: “Well, she’s neither stupid nor old enough to not know what’s going on.”

I just waved my hand and stood up. I went to my mom. I walked over to the speaker where she was still dancing, befitting a 20-year-old hot girl. The girls and boys around her were also dancing and I stood before them and looked at her. When she saw me, she exited the loudspeaker and jumped into my arms, shouting: “Manuel, Manuel...”

While she was hugging and kissing me like that, she shouted in my ear: -”Oh, I’m so happy, I feel so good. I have never felt such good.”

“Ok Mom, I know.”

And then she continued: “It’s so nice for me here.”

“Mom, you took something?”

“I did and it’s great, I’m very glad that we’re here.”

When she finally stopped hugging me, Kiki and Tino came and she repeated the same to them. We stayed at that place and danced with a few other girls and boys. Mom was also the center of attention. She danced in the middle and we stood in a circle around her. No matter how angry I was, when I saw how happy Mom was, everything somehow went away. Since I didn’t take anything, I needed more booze than they did, so I went to the bar more often to get booze, and that trip would also include small chats with people I met on the way to the bar, so the time passed quickly. I would go back to the dance floor, and every time I came, my mother would hug me and, with outpourings of happiness and love, repeat that this was the best time of her life.