“Oh, look at these cats,” Tess exclaimed. She and Todd were in the backmost room of an antique store that had been going out of business for years.

“They remind me of my grandparents,” Tess added.

“How so?” Todd asked.

“I don’t know exactly,” Tess said. “It’s some ineffable resemblance.”

“Ineffable,” Todd said. “Is that a euphemism for the F word?”

“Sometimes I don’t know about you,” Tess said. “I think we should get them. “Look, 80% off.”

Tess lifted the tag to make sure of the price. “Oh my goodness,” she blurted.

“What?”

“This one cat. He’s got ... He’s got ... A penis. It’s erect. It’s ... It’s so cute.”

“Does it resemble your grandpa’s? In some ineffable way?”

“Shut up, you. Now we really have to have them. That red tip. It makes me...”

“Makes you what?”

“Not what. Wet. It makes me want to suck you.”

“Right here?”

“I swear, Todd.”

“So where would we put them?”

“In the bedroom, of course. On that windowsill, so they could see out.”

“Or they could watch us when we’re—”

“Shut up!”

After admiring the newly purchased dancing cats perched on their bedroom windowsill, Todd asked Tess if she was ready to suck him.

“First we dance,” Tess announced. “Actually first we get undressed, then we dance.”

“This is nice,” Todd said as he and Tess swayed together.

“Better than nice,” Tess said. She adjusted Todd’s erection so instead of pressing above her belly button it slid between her thighs. The angle wouldn’t permit penetration, but Todd’s cock traversed the groove of Tess’s cunt.

“Oh God,” Tess groaned. “It’s scraping my clit just right. It’s going to make me...”

Another dance step and Tess was coming, her love juice gushing.

“That was ... That was ... I don’t think I’ve ever ... like that ... before.”

Tess dropped to her knees. Todd’s cock was covered with her fluids. “My nectar,” she said, before taking it into her mouth. Deep, then shallow, then deep. Then mostly just the cap, with her tongue tip fluttering.

Todd yowled and gushed. He filled Tess’s mouth to overflowing.

“Did I bite you?” Tess asked, after Todd and his penis had quieted.

“No, I don’t know,” Todd said. “It was just so intense. Like I was exploding. When you did that with your tongue.”

“My hummingbird technique.”

“Yes, that. When did you learn to do that? Was it something your grandma taught you?”

“Yes, Todd, it was. And I’ll be sure to teach my granddaughter, if we ever have one.”

“Don’t we first need to...?”

“Yes, we do, but not today.”

Todd nodded.

Tess said, “Aren’t you glad we got those cats? Look at them, all smug and satisfied on our windowsill, as if they just had ... Oh no!”

“What?”

“The cat’s ... the Grandpa cat’s penis has ... has fallen off. Not just fallen off. Disappeared.”

Todd inspected the statuettes.

“What do you think happened to it?” Tess asked.

Todd shrugged. “Probably in Grandma Cat’s pussy. Should we take them back to the antique store and get a refund?”

“Look,” said Tess. “There’s this whiteish powder on the floor. With a bit of pink mixed in.”

“Should I bring the vacuum cleaner?”

“I hate you,” Tess snapped.