Chapter 71

I was in shock. The love of my life just told me she had cancer.

Tamara continued, "I had the tests run again. I had another doctor examine me and he came up with the same diagnosis: ovarian cancer."

I moved over next to her and hugged her. "How bad is it?"

"They won't know for sure until they operate. My doctor thinks we may have caught it in the Class I stage. That means it is confined to the ovaries and hasn't spread to any of my other organs."

"Why did you wait until now to tell me?"

"I just got the second results yesterday. I decided I wanted to be away from our home when I told you. I finally told Lena about it last night. I made her promise not say anything until tonight."

"Well, you shouldn't have kept it from me." I felt hurt that she had kept it from me but at the same time I did understand.

"I was hoping they were wrong. I didn't want to worry you."

"How did they find it?"

"My doctor found it through a pap smear," she said.

"What can I do?"

"You can be there for me. I'm scared."

I held her and kissed her tears. "I'll be here for you. When are you scheduled to go into the hospital?"

"Friday. After the surgery, they want to do some chemotherapy to kill any tumor cells that are left."

Something came to me. "Is this why you expanded our relationship to include the other females?"

"Yes and no. I truly love having them but at the same time I wanted you taken care of, especially since I'll be out of commission for awhile."

"Baby, you will always please me; even without sex. I love you!"

I looked over at Lena and she was in tears. I pulled her to join us on the lounger and held her tight as well.

"Let's go back to the room," I said and led them back.

We retired to the bed. I made sure Lena knew she was wanted. Tamara was lying in the middle of the bed between both of us. There were lots of caressing, cuddling and kissing but no sex. I fell asleep holding her.

I woke up to the smell of coffee. I felt a body next to me and open my eyes to see Tamara looking at me. I pulled her to me and kissed her. Lena came in with two steaming mugs of coffee.

"Tell me I had a bad nightmare last night," I said.

"You didn't have a nightmare. I do have cancer. I would like to keep it a secret while we're here in Scottsdale, though."

"I'll try, but I have trouble hiding my emotions."

I think for the first time since we had been together, Mr. Happy wasn't in the mood for any fun. I went to the bathroom and started the shower. I had just wet my hair when I felt someone join me.

"I may be sick but I'm not fragile. I still want to make love with and to you as much as ever," Tamara said.

We took time washing each other. I was still in shock from the news. My heart felt heavy and hurt. I could kick the shit out of most men and yet I couldn't do a thing to help her.

After the shower I felt like I was in slow motion. I dressed and had breakfast with Tamara and Lena. The phone rang and it was Michelle. I gave the phone to Tamara. She talked a few minutes and hung up.

"The girls have decided to meet at the day spa at ten. I told them I would meet them there," she said and then turned to Lena. "Sorry, girl, but you have to work today."

Lena pouted but said she understood. Tamara left to grab her bag and head to the spa.

Lena waited until her mother left and said, "I'm sorry, John. I promised Mom I wouldn't say anything to you."

"I understand. Are you involved with me because of your mother's illness?"

"Not at all. I'm involved because I want to be. I didn't know about her illness until two days ago. I never suspected anything either."

"She kept it well hidden from me, that's for sure."

The phone rang and it was Lisa checking on our status. I told her we were ready. I grabbed Adam and we left.

Tom had met with the resort management and reserved a meeting room. He and George were there when we arrived. He had a table set up for Lisa and Lena to use. George worked with Lisa to load the templates on the computers while Lena set up the printer.

"Gentlemen, there has been a slight change in our plans. I found out that we can't do what we want with Ralph today. Since this is Sunday, everything we would do today wouldn't hold up in court. We'll meet with Ralph at eight in the morning."

"Oh darn! Do you mean we just have to enjoy ourselves at this resort today?" George asked.

'I'm afraid so," I teased.

Tom and George made sure Lisa was up to speed on the documents we would be providing. I worked on a PowerPoint display on Adam.

Since Phil was playing in a tournament that day, we turned on a TV to the channel carrying the event.

A yell went up and I saw that Phil had just sunk a thirty-foot putt for birdie. He was now three strokes up.

I lost myself in thoughts about Tamara. Was she trying to find me a suitable mate or mates if she died?

I called Ralph to confirm everything was set for the next morning. He said he was getting very anxious.

George and Bob helped me with the PowerPoint presentation. They both stared at the screen.

"Do you think that will work?" Bob asked.

George said, "The layout looks feasible."

"Don't say anything about this until the meeting tomorrow with James and Phil," I said.

We continued making adjustments and after about an hour we were through.

Phil had just made another birdie. His lead was now six strokes with four holes left. I'd bet we would have a happy camper flying in that night.

Phil won the tournament and we all celebrated for him. It was nigh on to four o'clock when we broke up and went to prepare for dinner. I booked us into the restaurant for six.

I hadn't been back at the suite very long when Tamara and Lena came in. They were laughing and joking. I walked up to Tamara and took her in my arms. I looked into her eyes and said, "I missed you and I love you." I kissed her deeply.

She embraced me and said she loved me too.

I looked over at Lena and asked her to join us. I pulled her into our embrace. I kissed her and said, "I love you, too."

I suggested we get ready for dinner. I stayed and watched Tamara strip out of her clothes. Mr. Happy definitely got what he wanted to see. She was so beautiful. I think I was looking at her in a new light. When she was completely naked, she sauntered over to me and said, "You still like?"

"Absolutely!"

She swished back to the bathroom and I followed. We didn't have sex but we did make love to each other, the kind that doesn't require intercourse. We finished cleaning up and dressed.