Chapter 39: A Face from the Past (1)

The dinner was at a French restaurant, quite well known, located not too far from the city center. Despite its reputation as an upper-scale joint, it still retained a sense of comfort and homey feel, instead of being as stuffy as some of the other French restaurants. We took Sarah's sedan, and she guided me through a maze of streets to the restaurant. After I parked the car, we walked the short distance. We checked our coats at the coat room and were met by the Maitre d'. I wasn't sure if Mark had used our name, but since we had discussed this was going to be my treat, I expected he might have.

And if he used his name, then I guess I'll look like an idiot!

"Tanner. Table for five," I said.

He checked his book. "Your friends have already arrived," he said, before leaving his station to take us to our table. "Right this way, Sir."

He tried to keep his eyes peeled to my face, but Dana and Sarah were very difficult to ignore. Dana chose that particular moment to brush something from my shoulder. I caught Sarah smiling knowingly, and I knew the poor guy had an interesting but short-lived view. After that she quickly hooked her arm to mine, while Sarah took my other arm and the Maitre d' turned to guide us to our table.

"That was naughty," I whispered to Dana.

She shrugged and with a straight face she said, "I was just trying to ensure we would have good service, and attention."

"Really? The service is supposed to be very good. And you have my attention," I retorted.

"Jealous?" she teased.

"I'm not, but it's not nice to tease the poor guy."

I didn't realize I was being subtly maneuvered into a corner.

"You're right, of course. What do you suppose I should do?" she asked with a mischievous smile.

Shit! And I walked right into it!

She laughed, and whispered, "Don't worry. I just wanted to see the expression on your face."

Finally, we were at our table, and Mark stood up, helping Kathy with her chair. I thanked the Maitre d', before he had a chance to seat the ladies. Taking the hint, he left to bring the wine cards. After the greetings were over, I helped Dana and Sarah with their chairs.

Before I could take my seat, Kathy said, "Mitch, can you call Mom? She called and told me she received a call from your office. It might be important."

"Did she mention who it was or anything else?" I asked, slightly annoyed at the interruption.

There was always the off chance that something might have happened, requiring me to return early. The emergencies were usually short lived, not more than a week at the most, and they were compensated with extra time off, but nevertheless they were irritations. She shook her head in the negative, indicating she didn't get any details from Mom. Excusing myself from the table, I went to look for a phone. I saw the Maitre d' on the way, and he showed me to the phone. I dialed the number, while trying to imagine what might have prompted the call from the office.

"Hello," Mom answered at the third ring.

"Ma, Mitchell. Kathy told me you got a call from the office."

"Hold on a second, Son. Let me get my glasses," she said. After a few seconds of silence, she was back on the line, and probably reading her notes. "A Mr. Matthews called. He wanted to get in touch with you. He said he was calling from the rig."

"That's my counterpart. What else did he say?"

"Nothing. He said he needed to get in touch with you."

"Nothing? No urgency or any other explanation?" I asked.

"No. He asked if I knew where he could reach you, but I gave him the standard line," she said.

I could hear the smile in her voice. Even though she might have been smiling, she didn't like what she was doing, but that was what I had asked her to do. The standard line was what the people from the office got when I was on vacation. Basically, Mom told them I was away, traveling, and she didn't have a number or address where she could reach me, but she would take a message in case I called. More or less everybody who knew me knew that I traveled a lot. I had lots of pictures from my trips. And I let them know I didn't keep in touch with my family very regularly, so the whole arrangement and the response were reasonable.

To tell the truth, I didn't really want to list my parents as the contact point to get in touch with me when I was off-duty. My main concern was that the people at the office would make a mistake and contact my parents if I were to be involved in an emergency or an accident while at work. For such situations, I had left strict instructions; they were supposed to contact the family lawyer first, and failing that, Kathy next, and under no circumstances, they were supposed to contact my parents. I didn't want my parents worried, and certainly, I didn't trust the people in the office to break bad news to my parents. I knew the family lawyer would be able to do a better job of gently breaking the news to my family. Neither my parents nor Kathy was aware of this little detail, only the family lawyer knew about it, because I had discussed with him my concerns, and he agreed with my reasoning. We both decided Kathy would be the logical choice if he weren't available, but we didn't inform Kathy. Considering the constant arguments I had had with my parents regarding the instability and danger where I worked, I knew I couldn't talk about it with Kathy; that would have given more ammunition to my family about the subject.

Hell! It had been as difficult as it were at the time, when I signed the contract. And last year... the attack to that rig...

I'm glad they aren't aware of the particular arrangements!

When I was on my days off, I didn't like to disturbed, except for real emergencies, such as when somebody got injured or had a family emergency they had to attend to. If it was something like replacing somebody in the office, I didn't care. They had plenty of people who could take the extra work. I was rarely called for something like that, but once it had happened. Since then, I had come up with the standard line for Mom and Dad. I didn't want to be stuck in the office, and that particular time the so called 'emergency' turned out to be a case of somebody attending a seminar, with nobody willing to pick up the extra work.

Those seminars are announced several months in advance. They should have planned for it as they did when they are scheduling the vacations and technical courses! It's not my problem, and I'm not going to let anybody make it my problem again!

Needless to say, I was very irritated. Of course, I hated the office work, mostly paper pushing. My irritation turned to resentment when they compensated the week in the office with only half the time off. Perhaps that was reasonable since it wasn't 24/7 work as it was on the rig, but on the other hand, I had to cut short four weeks off duty time. Even though I took the unused portion of my off duty time, it wasn't the same as the full four weeks, and with the break, it hadn't been enough to fully recuperate, physically and psychologically. If it had been a real emergency, and I had to work on the rig, it would have been different. Some people might say work is work, but for me, the essence of the problem lay in the fact that there hadn't been a real emergency or a real need for me to do that particular work. If they hadn't been able to get in touch with me at the time, they would have made do without me. What's more, we-rig personnel-weren't obligated to be available at their beck and call when we were off duty.

As these thoughts ran through my mind, I wondered what Tim wanted, before I stumbled upon...

Does he want to...

Last year, he was off during Christmas and New Year, and the previous year, we had shifted our schedules, so he could be with his family during the holiday season, as he knew I didn't celebrate either Christmas or New Year in the past. Since it wasn't a major hassle, and it was a personal favor to him, I didn't mind working an extra week. He compensated by working an extra week during his next tour. I remembered when I was doing my hand-over he hadn't mentioned anything, but at the time I was running on adrenalin, very tired, and we were discussing the operations that he would be busy with. I did a quick mental calculation and realized he would be missing Christmas and New Year this year.

Does he want to shift schedules again?

"Mitch, are you there?" Mom asked.

While trying to figure out what prompted Tim to call me I had forgotten about Mom.

"Sorry, Ma. I was wondering why Tim would call," I replied, absentmindedly.

"Maybe you should call him," she suggested, and her tone carried more than a little disapproval.

We had had a discussion about the standard line; why I did what I did, and I told her about my reasons. She understood my point of view, but she still maintained I should be loyal. My answer didn't make her any happier. I told her there was a big difference between 'being loyal' and 'being stupid'-especially when loyalty was being used to take advantage of people. I always gave more than 100% when I did my job, and they knew it; it was in my personal evaluation reports. So, the bottom line was, I didn't owe them anything. Not one bit. On the other hand, I had lost count of the times they tried to fuck people, including me. The whole deal, more than half a year ago, was still fresh on my mind. I didn't have to do what I did when there were labor problems, when they needed people to do the work on the rig floor. I did my part, in fact, more than required, and they had tried to screw me (trying to use the legal loopholes), but I had beaten them in their own game-Loyalty is a two way street, not one way!-I even gave her a full account of what had transpired and still, she insisted loyalty was important.

Sometimes, Ma, I don't understand you. Not at all!

On the other hand, she reluctantly agreed to follow my instructions. In the end, it was the example I gave her that convinced her. I argued that people had to go through secretaries to make appointments, and she wasn't a secretary, but an intermediary who didn't have any means of contacting me. That was pretty much the reality of the situation. I kept in regular touch-that was the part I lied to my colleagues about-when I was traveling, but never left a telephone number or address where my parents could reach me.

"I'll call him," I replied, and on second thought, I added, "in my own good time," receiving an exasperated sigh from the other end of the connection. "Thank you, Ma. Kathy sends her regards."

"Enjoy yourselves, Son. And don't forget to call him," she said before closing the connection.

I asked a passing waiter to put the call on my tab, but he told me it was courtesy of the establishment. After thanking him, I made my way to our table, while chuckling at my idiocy. Of course, it was courtesy of the establishment, what was I thinking?

Back at the table, Dana asked if there was a problem. I told her it wasn't an emergency, and I would deal with it tomorrow. I was planning to call Tim tomorrow night at Dana's place. I didn't want the telephone records to show he received a call from my hometown, nor did I want to return his call so soon. My mind was busy with what I wanted to do this year. Now, I had a girlfriend-correction, two girlfriends!-and they might want to do something special during the holiday season.

"Do you celebrate Christmas?" I asked Dana.

After a puzzled look, she replied, "Yes, I do."

"Would you like me to join you this year? I'm off duty during the holiday season."

She raised an eyebrow, then with a smile, she said, "Yes, Mitch. I'd like that very much."

"Umm... Maybe this isn't the right time to talk about it, but I might disappoint you."

"What do you mean, Mitch?"

"I'm not a very religious person," I said. When she didn't react, I continued, with a hesitant tone. "In fact, I'm not religious at all."

"Do you mean that as having no faith or belief in religion, or not practicing," she asked.

"I... I don't believe in anything, Dana. I think the closest belief system I can agree with is perhaps, Buddhism," I replied. I was worried about her reaction.

She patted my arm, and said, "I'm not much of a practitioner, and I respect others' choices in that matter. You're forgetting my parents' marriage wasn't only intercultural, but they were of different religions."

Oh, yeah! Of course! Her father and mother...

I smiled with relief at the thought. "I respect others' choices, too. It's just... I've never felt comfortable with faith or religion, or abstract things. Maybe that's why I'm confused and a bit skeptical about the differences in religions. In the end, don't they try to arrive at the same point?" I tried to explain myself, still feeling a bit nervous about what I said, but hoping she would understand.

She laughed at my comment. "I guess they do. At least that's what I learned from Mom, and she should know it, first hand." After a momentary hesitation, she asked, "Haven't you ever wondered about how things came to be?"

"I guess. I mean apart from the scientific hypotheses and explanations. There might be something out there, but... to me it's too abstract. I don't know, Dana."

"I was curious, Mitch. You have a sense of right and wrong, and you're passionate about things, and feel very strongly about them. I was wondering where you got that."

"Good indoctrination by parents? A basic belief in human frailty? I don't know... Pick any one of myriad things you can think of."

That drew more laughter and I noticed the others were watching us, catching parts of our little talk.

"Sorry," I said to them, but Kathy, being the most curious of them all, wasn't ready to let me get out of it.

"Interesting topic. What prompted you?" she asked.

"Nothing specific. I realized I would be off duty during the holiday season. This year I want to take advantage of the opportunity."

"That would be nice, Mitch," Kathy replied, and from her tone, I knew she was urging me to spend the time with the family, but she wasn't going to come out with it, especially when Dana was there. Still, it was obvious what she meant.

I was caught between a rock and a hard place; I didn't know how to respond. She must have realized her gaff, because she said, "We could all be together for New Years. All of us."

That was a solution, but it meant introducing Dana to the family. I wasn't against the idea, but it was too early. The problem was Kathy didn't know that we weren't committed to each other, and that the future of our relationship was yet to be defined. Then there was Sarah, although she could join as Kathy's best friend. I was sure that had happened before. I knew it would probably be just a few hours with my parents, only the dinner, after which we would all go out. That was what we did when we were in college; going out with our friends after dinner. Still...

If I say no, then Dana might think I'm not serious about her, but if I say yes, then...

"That's why I opened the subject," I replied, looking at Kathy. I wasn't saying I would or I would not, and what 's more, I had already asked Dana first, and I tried to remind Kathy of the fact with a pointed look. From the expression on my face, Kathy realized what I was doing. I was a bit irritated at her, for what had been an impulsive suggestion. She should have been a bit more careful.

"It's too early to make plans," Dana said.

I wasn't sure if she had sensed my irritation, or was coming to my rescue, but I was still feeling uncomfortable. I didn't want to give her the wrong impression. I decided to bite the bullet, now that it was almost inevitable.

"I think that was-" I was saying when Dana interrupted me.

"Mitch, honey. It's too early to plan for the holidays. Let's say, we'll make arrangements to get together, and free our calendars accordingly."

I was going to add my two cents, but her eyes were telling me to drop the subject, and I acquiesced to her silent request with a nod.

While I had my attention on Dana, I almost missed Mark and Kathy. From what I caught from the corner of my eye, it looked like Mark was telling her to drop the subject, but Kathy responded with an irritated look, flashing her eyes at him. Mark's eyes tightened for a moment, but he quickly busied himself with inspecting his napkin, instead of responding to Kathy.

Shit! That's what we need, now! It's supposed to be her night, but that doesn't give her the right to...

I was going to let it go after Dana's suggestion, but seeing Kathy give Mark the evil eye, made me more irritated. I was racking my brain trying to find a way to get things under control. I knew I couldn't do anything about it, except to pull her aside and have a private chat. However, I didn't want to do that, because I wasn't sure if I could control my temper. This was supposed to be a happy night, a celebration, not a night of petty arguments. Besides, it was between the two, but somehow I felt responsible, because Mark looked like he was trying to rein in Kathy's enthusiasm, to help me out, and was now getting tongue lashed for it, and I really didn't want them have an argument over something like that; partly, I was feeling guilty. Not to witness further arguments between Kathy and Mark, and to calm my nerves, I excused myself from the table to use the facilities. Dana gave a quizzical look, and I shook my head in the negative to put her at ease. I wasn't very successful, because she returned a sympathetic smile in understanding. I kissed her, and left the table, not daring to look at Kathy.

In the lavatory, I splashed cold water to my face, and tried to calm down. I was surprised at the resentment I felt at Kathy, and couldn't figure out why I was so irritated at that little incident. I knew she could be impulsive at times, but... Perhaps, I was angry because she put me in a spot I was trying to avoid. I guess I was also worried about messing up things with Dana while we were still taking the first steps to something very much complicated-already. I took a moment to consider my feelings, and realized I was very much apprehensive about the possibility of losing the little happiness I seem to have found with Dana. Despite the possible complications, there was a promise of more happiness in our uncertain future. It kind of shocked me to realize the way I thought about it, because it was another evidence of how much I was starting to rely on other people, something I was never comfortable about, in the past.

What has changed?

I decided to put the question aside. I didn't want to worry about things that had no answers, and were still in the future. After one last check in the mirror, I walked out of the lavatory, and came to a dead stop; Kathy was waiting for me. Seeing me, she motioned us to a quiet corner.

Without a preamble she asked, "Why are you so upset?"

This time I couldn't hold it inside, and replied, "Do you know what you did?"

"What did I do?" she responded with an irate tone.

"If you don't know what you did, maybe you should think it over before asking me that question," I replied, trying to keep calm.

"Tell me what I did?" she insisted, and this time I could see from the expression on her face she knew what she did, but was unwilling to admit to it.

"Let's drop it, OK? All of us gathered tonight for you, to celebrate you and Mark, and have a good time. I don't want the evening to be spoiled."

Her eyes flashed in anger and she fumed for a second. I realized she was offended by my patronizing tone. Then she hit back with, "And you'd rather be with your two girls."

"Jeez, Kathy! Are you out of your mind? You were the one who wanted to go out tonight, and every one of us thought it was a good idea and made plans accordingly. What's your problem?"

"And you make plans for holiday season with your girlfriend," she came back.

"So?"

"Instead of spending it with the family."

"Kathy!" I exclaimed, before I took a deep breath to control my irritation. I moved to pull her in my arms, but she resisted. "Kathy, please. Do you know what you're saying?"

"Do you know what you're doing?" she came back.

"That's not fair, Kathy. How can you say that? You're already making your own family," I found myself saying. It was almost a reflexive, involuntary response, a result of my growing resentment.

She colored at the comparison, how different our lives were. Still, she tried to come back again. "I already have a family, as you do."

"We'll always be family, Kathy, and you know that. Don't play dumb with me, please. That's not you."

This time she didn't respond.

"I never expected something like that. Didn't you realize what kind of tight spot you put me in? You were impulsive. Even Mark realized, and-" I said, but Kathy cut me off.

"Don't mix Mark into this."

Ignoring her outburst, and despite my better judgment, I continued. "And you gave him the evil eye. Tell me, is that how you treat Mark?"

"I told you not to-"

I cut her off. "Just stop for a moment and think why Mark would do what he did, and whether he earned the evil eye."

"I said-"

"I heard you the first time. What are you going to do next? Are you going to call me Mitchell, instead of Mitch or Bro?"

She kept quiet, trying to gather herself to come up with an answer, because she was still angry, but my continuous assault had an effect, slowing her down.

"Weren't you the one who said to me, the road to hell was paved with good intentions?" I asked, softly.

That took the wind from her sail. She kept her eyes locked to mine, but the anger was fading away.

"Kathy, I knew it was impulsive," I said, and as the words left my lips, my mind was busy with 'impulsive.' I continued with a gentle tone, "Don't you think I don't understand that? After so long, you wanted the whole family to be together. Look, I was hasty also, OK? I was talking to Dana, and making on the spot plans, and I didn't realize it. I'm sorry. I love you, Kathy. But, you're already making your family, and I didn't give a second thought to how my plans would affect you. I just didn't see a reason, because..." I trailed off. I didn't want to repeat the obvious a second time. She had her own family, well almost. Dad and Mom were used to not having me around, so they hadn't entered the equation. Even I hadn't realized the true nature of the situation until I was giving her the sermon. I had been impulsive and hasty as much as she had been.

After a long silence, she said, "I'm sorry, Bro. I don't know what came over me." Then she moved into my arms. "I forgot. I really forgot, and didn't realize it."

"You're not the only one, Kathy. I forgot, too. Come on, Sis. Tonight's your night, and Mark's."

She sniffled, but didn't make a move to disengage.

"Kathy, you will ruin your make up, and probably my jacket as well, with your tear marks," I quipped.

She reached with her fingers, and pinched my earlobe, twisting it hard, while sniffling and giggling at the same time. "Be nice to me."

"I'll be very nice to you, Kathy. I'm sorry, too. We'll figure out something. OK?"

"If you can... It's been too long, Mitch, and I'm sorry for what I did," she said with an apologetic and pleading tone.

"I understand, Sis. I was also impulsive. I guess we both have to get used to some things."

"I know... I think I understand; you think it might be too early to introduce Dana to the family. I see that, now. I hadn't thought about it. You know I'm very much impressed with her, and thought it would be nice to have her with the family," she replied.

"I know... I know... It's all right, Kathy. We'll figure out something."

"I love you," she said, then slowly pulled herself from my embrace.

When she looked at me, I grimaced. "God! You look like a horror show. I'm glad Mark hasn't seen this."

"You said you'll be nice to me."

"I am being nice to you. I didn't say how you really look," I retorted. Before she could respond, I grabbed her, and turning her, patted her bottom, pushing her towards the ladies room. "Go, get refreshed."

"One of these days, Mitch..." she said, and I was very much tempted to get the last word, but I let her have it.

I went back to the table. I noticed Sarah was missing also. Taking my seat, I asked, "Where are the girls?"

"The powder room," Mark answered.

I felt Dana's hand on my thigh, and turned to her. "Did anybody order drinks?"

She wasn't fooled by my question or my attempt to divert attention elsewhere. Her expression didn't change, but her hand was busy on my thigh, and her eyes were asking if things were all right. "Yes, we all ordered. I ordered white wine for you," she said.

"Good choice. Thank you," I responded with a smile, then leaning in I kissed her neck, and whispered, "Everything's OK!" She squeezed my thigh in reply.

About ten minutes later, Sarah and Kathy returned, all smiles. Kathy had her make-up refreshed. She took her seat, then kissed Mark, whispering something. From the expression on his face, I knew Kathy was making up with him.

I took the opportunity to check on Dana again, but she seemed pleased with how things turned out. Still... feeling my eyes on her, she turned to me smiled again. Leaning in, she squeezed my thigh, then gave a slight nod towards Sarah. I chuckled in response.

You are some woman!

I turned to Sarah, giving her a quizzical look. I suspected she had a hand in what happened. I wasn't wrong.

"I thought Kathy might want to have a word with you, so I suggested a visit to the powder room," she whispered.

I kissed her neck, while whispering, "Thank you."

"You're welcome, Mitch. You're not angry with-"

"Nope. Everything is OK!" I cut her off, and kissed her neck again. We both knew how she felt about Kathy.

The waiter arrived with our drinks, and after he left, we raised our glasses for Kathy and Mark. Then, Kathy returned it, raising her glass, and offering a toast for 'love and friendship, ' while her eyes traveled between the two girls and me. A waiter brought fresh bread rolls and butter, and took our orders for appetizers. After he left we continued chatting. My eyes caught a couple being shown to their table by the Maitre d'. At first, I wasn't sure if my eyes were playing a trick, but as they neared our table, I recognized an old friend. He was scanning the tables, and he noticed I was watching him. For a few seconds, he had a puzzled expression on his face, before it gave way to recognition and a big grin.

I put my napkin on the table and stood up to greet him, getting a surprised look from our table, except Dana, who had noticed my attention on the couple long before the others. Following my gaze, Kathy and Mark turned to look at the arrivals. By then, the couple was by our table.

"Mitchell," he exclaimed, as I made my way to him.

The Maitre d' stopped, and stepped aside.

"Alex. Long time no see." We shook hands before hugging each other. "What brings you here?"

"Had a meeting in town which ran late, and missed our flight, so we have to spend the night in town," he replied. Turning to his companion, he said, "Sabine, meet Mitchell Tanner. An old friend. Mitchell, Sabine Bremens, my colleague."

From her name, I gathered she was German, a foreigner. Her thick accent confirmed my suspicions when she greeted me. She was a tall brunette, with dark brown eyes, high cheekbones, very amply endowed, with generous curves in all the right places, but especially around the hips.

Typical Alex!

He had always been an ass-man first, and a tit-man second.

Turning to our table, I made the introductions, starting with Sarah, then moving on to Dana. "Sarah Morgan and Dana Conor, meet an old friend and an ex-colleague, Alexei Tsadiris, and his colleague, Sabine Bremens."

After the greetings, I turned to Kathy, but before I could say anything, she took it upon herself to greet Alex. "Hello, Alex. How are you?"

"Hello, Kathy. It's nice to see you again," Alex returned. "Are you still the same ball of fire, or have you mellowed?"

"What do you think, Alex?" Kathy responded with an amused smile.

"I think some things don't change." With a smile, he added, "And some things shouldn't change at all."

"Have you changed, Alex?" Kathy replied, returning a mischievous grin.

"I don't know. Only time will tell." Realizing that the rest of the table was being left out, he directed his attention to Mark, and asked Kathy for the introductions. "Would you do the honors?"

"With pleasure, Alex. Mark Brandon, my fiancé."

With great enthusiasm, Alex shook hands with Mark, and I could see Mark was surprised, especially after the little exchange between Alex and Kathy. Kathy chose that moment to add, "We're celebrating... sort of a pre-engagement. Before we break the news to my parents."