Chapter 19

I studied the Saturday night city skyline. I needed the time away from home so I volunteered to close the restaurant for one of the other busboys.

Rachel was even angrier than after Melisa and I had our discussion about manipulating me. I suspected Melisa wanted me to react to her pushing the limit but Rachel had not yet seen Melisa at her manipulative best. In truth, I enjoyed Melisa's manipulations; sort of like watching a no net high-wire act.

I could not say that I enjoyed having a Jason storm raised by Dr. Lawren's challenge but then neither could she. My extended thoughtful mood was making the Siblings irritable with each other and Rachel. If I had bothered to care, the turmoil around me would have made my life uncomfortable during the preceding two weeks.

I considered the restaurant I worked in a McDonald's for people with money. Nothing high-class enough to be intimidating but overpriced in my opinion. I had finished resetting the tables to the Sunday configuration and was standing with my tie in hand.

"Hey, man. You still here?" I heard from behind me.

I turned around to see the side-order cook walking up to me. I shook his outstretched hand before replying.

"Just got done, Josh."

"Long night, man?"

I shrugged.

A regular Saturday always meant the same things: overbooked, pissed off diners, pissed off management, and pissed off cooks. The waiters if they had the time would have been pissed off to.

"You work tomorrow, man?" he asked.

"Nah, dude. Only work Fridays and Saturdays now," I replied with another shrug.

"School?"

"Not really, just planning to put in more hours at my school job this year."

The ready lie; a Jason lesson in keeping people out.

He nodded.

"Wanna go for a beer at the go-go bar? Some of the guys already headed that way," he asked.

"Nah," I said looking at the city lights again. "I'm just gonna go home and go to bed. Thanks anyway though."

"Alright, if you change your mind stop by, I'll buy you the first beer."

He shook my hand and worked his way around tables to go out the back door. I stood there for a few more minutes. I heard the other busboys at the bar waiting for tips. I walked up to the bar and sat down to wait with them.

"Hey, Dave. Is that your Beamer?"

There were two bartenders on Saturday; I looked at the one asking the question.

"It's my housemate's."

Another ready lie.

"Your housemate let's you drive her BMW?"

I shrugged, even if it was my car sometimes I felt like I had to ask Melisa to fit me into her schedule so I could drive it. I thought about buying myself another and letting Melisa decide which color she preferred on any given day. I had learned to accept that if there were two identical things, one Melisa's and one David's, Melisa would always use David's so buying her a car would not get me my car back.

The bartender stared at me trying to find a way to get more information. I only associated with one or two people at work so he would have to wait until they asked. The other bartender finished the tip-out and handed out the cash. I made a C-note and almost laughed remembering the balance of my checking account. I sat while the bartenders cleaned up and closed the bar. The manager and I made some small talk. He was alumni of my University and wanted dates for a few events. I told him I would email them to him. Finally, I walked to the back of the restaurant and up to the employee dressing area. I could see a light under the management office but did not think much of it. I changed, moving as if my body were on autopilot. The two bartenders came up to change and left before I was done. The restaurant manager opened the office and walk inside. I heard a brief conversation and he came back out.

"David's still here," he called into the office.

"Hey, David can you do me a favor?" he asked.

"What's up?" I replied.

"Marie wants do about a half-hour's work so that she doesn't have to come in tomorrow, but her car is in the shop. Can you keep her company and wait with her for a cab when's she's done?"

He looked like he had plans for the night and waiting for Marie was not among them.

"Yeah, no problem," I answered closing my locker.

"You sure, man?"

I shrugged.

"Tell her to forget the cab, I'll give her a ride home."

"Thanks a lot, man."

He hurried inside as if he were afraid I would change my mind. He came out carrying a change of clothes, said thanks again and rushed down the steps.

I walked up to the door. Marie looked up from the computer screen.

"Hey, baby," she said in a teasing voice.

"Hey, sweetie," I replied imitating her tone.

I would say that the reasons Marie was one of the people I talked to in the restaurant were altruistic. She was around my age with an undergraduate degree in English literature, but altruism had nothing to do with it. She was five foot seven with strawberry blonde hair, more strawberry than blonde, and had the most incredible blue-green eyes. To cap it off, she had the second best ass I ever saw on a woman. The best was in grammar school and the girl eventually lost it so it probably did not count. Quite a few of the guys tried their hands at getting into Marie's pants but none that I knew of had succeeded. I saw the action and decided not to bother. She always called me baby, so I teased her with the sweetie.

"Thanks for waiting," she said.

"No problem. I'll give you a ride home too."

"You don't have to, David," she told me.

"It's no big deal. It's halfway to my place anyway."

"You sure?"

I put my bookbag down and sat at the chair next to the table. Marie earned extra money at the restaurant by doing a lot of the paperwork. I knew she was getting ready to quit and this was a way to transition out. I also knew she was serious about her boyfriend but was edging away from anything more seriously committed than having each other's keys. We talked about it once on a slow day. She loved him, but was not sure if that was it, nor was she was ready for happily ever after to start.

Having only witnessed the debacles called military marriages, I had nothing to say about the staying power of 'til death do us part'.

"How's your summer going?" she asked me.

"It's okay. Taking a class. Found a place for the year," I replied.

"Nice place?" she asked as she continued to type in data.

"It's cool. I'm lucky to have found it."

"How're the housemates?" she asked smiling.

Freshman and sophomore years had saddled me with shithead roommates. At least my freshman year, it was the omnipresent smell of hash that annoyed me. Even with my sensitive sense of smell, I would have chosen that over the frat shithead.

"Actually, I like my housemates. Three females and a guy."

"I bet you like living with three women," she said.

I shrugged.

"I'm guessing that little blonde and the smokin' redhead."

I nodded.

Melisa needed my car to go window shopping for the Sibling vehicles the day before. She dropped me off by the valet parking in front of the restaurant. Doris Alex and her found it absolutely necessary to express their overwhelming gratitude in public for my gift. It caused a few raised eyebrows.

"From those kisses, I'm guessing they're a little more than housemates."

"I regularly do the dishes," I replied.

She laughed before returning to her work.

"I heard you wouldn't be working here after next semester," she told me.

"I decided to follow you out, sweetie. How could I work here without my Marie?" I teased.

She laughed again.

"I've already cut my Sundays."

"I thought you needed this job?" she asked curiously.

"I never needed the money," I said with a shrug.

Jason and I spent very little money during our time in the military and I had inherited his savings. Between the GI Bill and six years of savings, I had been set for my time in college even before the Brotherhood.

"This was free spending money and time away from school."

"You don't need that anymore?"

"The house is time away from school," I answered honestly. "What about you? You just graduated and you're still here."

She glared at me comically.

"I have a few offers, I'm waiting for the writing agent to get back to me before I consider any others seriously."

She applied for a position with a literary agent in the city. She said she kicked ass and was waiting for him to call back.

"How much longer are you going to wait?" I asked.

"I called him yesterday. He has one more interview that was rescheduled for Monday but unless that person is fantastic he said he would be offering me the job."

I nodded.

"So with any luck, I'll be handing in my two weeks on Monday."

I clapped.

She reached over to poke my shoulder.

I watched as she continued to enter numbers into the computer. She was attractive in that girl next door fashion: very light skin, a dusting of freckles on her nose, nicely shaped lips, healthy, not much in the breast department but great breasts with that ass would have been too much. The blue-green eyes put her over the top anyway; they changed color with clothing, lighting and her mood.

I wondered what color they would be in the middle of an orgasm, maybe a dark green or a light blue.

I shook myself internally. I sat quietly for ten minutes staring at the ceiling thinking about my situation with Dr. Lawren. Her attempt to score had cleared my head. Having her no longer mattered to me. I think that annoyed her as much as it amused Professor Ryan.

I watched Marie stop typing for a second to lean her head forward and rub at the back of her neck.

"I could do that if you want."

She looked at me before nodding. I moved to stand behind her chair. I put my hands down about two inches below her neck and applied pressure. I understood her hesitation; most of the guys at the restaurant had talked about her and tried to score her, their word. I never bothered, mostly because considering female tastes there were much better choices than me among the restaurant staff. Even though I complimented her and showed interest in that "You're female, I'm male and let's not forget it" way, I tried to make sure it was not intimidating. Marie gave me someone to talk to when I was bored in the restaurant and that was more important than finding out that I did, in fact, not have a chance with her.

I thought about what had happened over the last few weeks, working with my hands always allows me to think. I made a mistake with Dr. Lawren; actually I made many mistakes. I played her game. A smaller mistake was giving Melisa too much slack.

The full confession of Melisa's maneuverings helped me understand her much better. I never considered how different Melisa was from me. I assumed she was the opposite of whatever I was. It was a bad assumption and her goals exemplified how different we really were. I let her continue with her plans. All of them were interesting even the ones I thought were doomed to failure, like Rachel. The most surprising thing about her plans was the depth to which she was winding herself around my life. I was being used as a center point around whose gravity she could live her life. Her need for someone else to be her center was one of the hardest things to understand.

My mistakes with Dr. Lawren were not as understandable.

I rubbed the left side of Marie's neck. She leaned her head in the opposite direction to give me better access. I switched from using fingertips, to most of my fingers, to having my palm on her neck squeezing and carrying that squeeze up and off her neck. After a minute, she leaned her head the other way so I would switch sides.

Fingertips, fingers, palms and then my entire hand coaxed her neck into relaxing. I moved my hands to her shoulders and rubbed there when she started typing again. I worked on her shoulders and the upper part of her biceps and triceps.

I let Dr. Lawren dictate the action. Her failed knife-thrust shifted the power away from her but not necessarily towards me. The Siblings watched us warily. I failed with Janet somehow and was close to the same with Dr. Lawren. Melisa said it was Janet's failure but would not tell me what she expected me to gain from my experiences with Dr. Lawren.

I had not pressured her for that answer at the time of our discussion. Melisa trying to make up for bad behavior was very distracting.

I moved my hands to the base of Marie's neck and trailed fingertips to the skin behind her earlobes. I pressed in slightly and moved my fingers in small circles. I traced the back of her ear with applied pressure. I placed three fingers where her cheekbone and ear came together and pushed her skin forward until I was on her temples. Moving in slow backwards circles, I alternated the finger that rubbed the tension away. Every few seconds I ran a finger across her forehead. I felt the chair bump into me as she flexed her shoulders after a few minutes of that. She stood up suddenly and without looking at me turned the chair around so it was no longer in my way.

I stopped for a second to consider. I knew she was having problems with her boyfriend. He was applying serious pressure on the issue of a larger commitment to each other.

I let the thought pass.

She had trouble concentrating and every few seconds the keyboard went silent. I smiled, enjoying the game. I had been practicing my backrubs on Melisa and Doris Alex since I moved into the house. I graduated to not thinking of them as backrubs but clothed massages. I got much better at it with partners always willing to be on the receiving end.

I got much better at quite a few things with partners always willing to be on the receiving end.

I smiled as I realized I was having a hard time concentrating on my thoughts of Dr. Lawren and the problem she represented.

Starting between her shoulders, I worked my fingers to Marie's shoulder blades waiting for her to say something. The keys went silent again. I rubbed the upper part of her back for five minutes before she moved again. She was wearing a light summer sweater because of the air conditioning. She reached down to pull the sweater over her head, leaving her in a white t-shirt and bra. I lowered my head to take a deep breath and noticed she was wearing light brown string pants; summer pants that look like sweats but are much thinner. The only thing that holds them up is a string tied at the waist. On a normal woman they look good, with a nice ass they look great, and if she has more than a nice ass you are in trouble. On Marie, I was dead in the water.

I had gotten better at not drowning though: the willing partners and all.

Another deep breath helped. While I tried to regain control, I put my thumbs on opposite sides high on her back. I applied pressure bringing the tips inward to touch at her spine. I moved my thumbs down the line that bisected her.

She leaned forward with her ass over the edge of chair. She put her forearms on the back of the chair and rested her head on them. It was a problem because her ass in that position made most of the blood in me rush towards a central location. I also had trouble with my position so I went down on one knee.

I settled into a waiting pattern.

I moved my hands to the top of her spine and rubbed my thumbs down her back. I was staring down at the way her ass looked over the edge of the chair. I wanted to make any decision to stop hard for her to vocalize.

Her position forced the t-shirt, which was small, to ride up about three inches. I touched the small of her back with my fingers. I was above her pants, and she leaned forward exposing a line of skin the pants had previously covered.

I tested the water.

I turned my thumbs toward each other and move them down to the waist of her pants. I turned them so they pointed towards the floor. On the turn, I got my thumbpads touching the skin beneath the waist of her pants. I applied pressure towards her hips and then moved back towards her spine until my thumbs touched. I inched my fingers towards her hips again.

At this point, I dropped all pretense of not trying to have her naked beneath me. I planned, with no expectation, but planning every move that came next.

I moved to the outside of her back still underneath her pants. I kept going around the upper part of her hips. I kept going around her waist. I pulled my thumbs out and turned my hands so that my fingers lay on her stomach. Keeping them in contact with her skin, I brought them around to her back again.

She did not retreat no matter how much I pushed against her willingness to continue. It was fun to play on the edge of our reluctance for a while but eventually I had to make a definitive move. It was untying the drawstring of her pants, which she answered by taking off her t-shirt.

I could see the tension of wanting but not knowing if she wanted to do the thing she wanted.

I rubbed bare skin gently. I looked down to see that her pants rode lower, halfway between her waist and the chair. I could see the beginning of the cleft between her ass cheeks above light tan panties. They were classic panties for the most part if not as wide. I traced lines with my fingers in random places along her back.

I ran a finger on the line of Marie's panties along her back, around her right hip to the middle of her stomach. My other hand met it there and completed the circle around her body.

I played with her bra clasp telling her with my hands more was coming. The clasp was a point of no return and she tensed every time I approached it. I almost laughed wondering if she was sitting there thinking "God, get fucking to it!"

This whole male/female thing would be a lot easier if asking "Do you want to have sex?" were not so unseductive.

I ran my fingers along the bra almost to the front. She tensed as my fingers touched the sides of her breasts. I stopped moving while keeping my fingers in contact with her. She relaxed but seemed expectant. I put my palms on her body, not moving my fingers. I traveled my hands down her sides. I kept moving downwards, pushing her pants further off her body. I turned my hands so that my nails touched her ass and traced it along the chair.

She pushed her hips back, forcing her ass out a little more. I was where I wanted to be so I enjoyed a few fantasies I had about Marie as I played with her ass. I probably did it for a lot longer than I should have.

A Sibling does not mind waiting that first time, or any other. The thoughts that a Sibling does not mind much at all if it involves being naked with a Brother, and that they were my new standard occurred to me.

The skin at her hips tightened as she squeezed her ass in reaction to my touch. Her feet moved restlessly. I put my hands on her hips and pushed my fingers into her pants. Deciding to tease, I returned to massaging her back. She wriggled her ass on the chair.

There was no question she wanted it all now. I was the one who would have to fuck it up for us to stop. Her body had been convinced. I moved my hands up her spine, and without hesitation undid the bra clasp.

She took a sharp breath.

I gave her newly bare skin the attention it deserved. I touched her from hairline down to the skin covered by her panties. Kneeling down had become uncomfortable so I sat back on my heels. I concentrated on the small of her back and ass.

Light touches, rubs, tracings; anywhere that I could study the contact of my hands on her body. I leaned forward and warmed the skin at the small of her back with my breath. She arched her back slightly.

She wanted now, not just her body wanted, she wanted.

I could have but it was not enough.

It hit me hard.

It was never going to be enough again.

I leaned forward and kissed the base of her spine. She gasped as my lips touched her skin. I extended my tongue to taste her. I wet her skin along the line of her panties, left then right.

It would never be enough again.

She was giving but I wanted more.

I kissed a line from the base of her spine to her neck. I put my hands on her hips and sat back on my heels. I spread my knees as far as I could and guided her down between my legs. She came without struggle.

I put my hands on her stomach and drifted upwards to cup her breasts. I pulled her back so that her naked back was against me. I kissed the hollow between neck and shoulder.

I wanted everything.

I kissed her neck as I caressed her nipples.

I did not want just her body.

I let go of her breasts and moved my hands up lifting the bra. She raised her arms to allow me to remove it from her body. It came off her hands and fell between her legs.

I wanted everything she was.

I put my teeth on the back of her neck as my hands renewed their attention on her breasts. I ran my thumbpads in tight circles around tighter nipples. I bit the muscle between her shoulder and neck. Her breathing turned harsh as her excitement grew.

Even if it only lasted for the time we were naked, I wanted everything she was.

My hands trailed down her stomach until they were on the inside of her thighs. I pulled them apart slowly. I pushed my body towards her and she leaned forward. I kept going and she had to get on her knees.

Marie was offering her body, but I wanted what a Sibling gave me during the moments we came together.

Everything they are.

I knelt up bringing her head back onto my chest. My hands touched the front of her neck. Her eyes were closed. I circled her nipples again before I brought my hands up to touch her face gently.