Chapter 1

It was a hot spring afternoon. Birds could be heard singing throughout the area. The palm trees around me hissed as a warm breeze passed through their dry and brittle fronds. I could taste the salt air on my tongue. I couldn't have asked for a more perfect day.

My heart started pounding as the first few chords of Pachelbel's Canon in D came from the harp player behind me. As the music built momentum, the bridesmaids began coming down the aisle dressed in their flowing pink dresses. Every last one of them was stunningly beautiful.

My heart tied itself in knots as the first three bridesmaids slowly walked down the aisle to be met by their groomsman and then escorted to their place for the wedding. The maid of honor was next. She smiled at me warmly, lovingly. I returned the smile and choked back a tear. I loved her almost as much as the woman I was marrying today and she loved me just the same. She took the hand of my best man, he bowed, and then they parted and took their places on either side of me.

The first notes of Mendelssohn's Wedding March struck up on the organ and my heart skipped a beat. I watched as my beautiful bride, dressed in a beautiful, lacy, traditional white wedding dress, came slowly down the aisle. My eyes met hers and together we conveyed the love we had for each other. Her eyes held to mine. She didn't search the crowd for relatives or friends. She didn't even look at the wedding party or the judge officiating the wedding. Her eyes were just focused to mine. She was such a vision of loveliness.

As she approached me, the best man came down next to her. Our gaze still did not break as the judge asked who would give this woman and the best man offered her to me. A single tear escaped my eye and she gently wiped it from my cheek with a smile.

The ceremony went fairly quick. It wasn't a religious service, neither of us all that religious in the first place. We held our gaze as much as possible during the ceremony. We said our vows and exchanged our rings and finally it was official.

"With the authority granted to me by Pinellas County, Florida, as a duly sworn magistrate of the same, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."

I kissed her with all the passion of all of our lovemaking to that point. It was beautiful and wonderful. The world around me drowned away. No guests sitting on white wooden folding chairs. No sound of the caterers preparing for the reception. No sound of the boats out on the water or of the palm trees swaying in the wind. It was just her and I. Perfection. We broke our kiss finally and looked into each other's eyes once again. Pure love.

"I now present to you for the first time, Mr. and Mrs. Gregory Hamilton!" exclaimed the judge.

Everyone in attendance came to their feet and applauded us. I felt joy and euphoria like I had never experienced in my life. It was obvious that my bride felt the same way as she took my hand into hers and we marched down the aisle proudly. As we walked to the back of the aisle and into my aunt's house I thought how lucky I was to be marrying this beautiful woman.

As we started the pictures, my bride was engaged in most of the early shots so I stood and watched her and remembered. I remembered all that we had been through to get to this day. The joys, the sorrows... definitely the sorrows, to bring us to this wonderful day...

I moved to Florida from Michigan after I graduated high school to attend the University of South Florida and also to spend some time with my Aunt Grace. My Aunt Grace was the black sheep of the family, which is probably one of the reasons I liked her so much. She married young; too young for my mother's Christian values. On top of that, the man she was marrying was almost 20 years her senior. Unfortunately for Grace, the marriage only lasted five years, ending in tragedy when her husband Frank was killed in a speedboat accident.

Grace was provided for after his death. Her husband was a millionaire many times over and left everything to her. The money meant nothing to her. She grieved many years after his death. She became a recluse, not leaving her house if she could manage it. When I came to Florida for school, I got her to return back to the world of the living. I like to think that I was good therapy for her, and she was good therapy for me after 18 years of living with my intolerable parents.

My freshman year of college I decided to live in the dorms. I could have lived with Aunt Grace, but I wanted some level of independence. Grace footed my entire college bill including the dorms and also gave me something of an allowance as well. I kept trying to refuse it and take jobs, but she kept making sure I lost those jobs and insisted on paying. Eventually I just gave in, realizing that it brought her joy to be putting me through school.

I decided somewhere in my freshman year that I was going to study marine biology. I had gotten hooked into scuba diving when I first arrived in Florida and that was what drove my interests into that major. Scuba diving became my sole hobby. I didn't participate in any clubs or organizations at school. I never did that in high school so I saw no reason to do it in college either. I instead worked hard the entire year on achieving PADI Master Diver certification.

With all of the diving, I managed to get in pretty good shape. I was never muscular up to that point; I even had a bit of a gut when I came to Florida, but I ended up toning up and building some muscle and of course a nice bronze tan.

By the time classes began in fall of my freshman year, I was already starting to look pretty toned. I had no problem finding a girlfriend my first week of classes. Her name was Heather. Heather was a really hot blonde that looked like she came off the cover of Maxim. She was from Kansas, about as out of place in Florida as a guy from Michigan. We hit it off really well. She took my virginity the first week that we were dating. After that she basically taught me a lot about pleasing a woman. It was a wonderful relationship. I was absolutely head over heels in love with her. I was even contemplating making a proposal by the end of the school year.

I also met another girl during this time. Her name was Ashley. Ashley was a little spitfire Irish girl, complete with the red hair and fair complexion. While she wasn't model material, she exuded her own kind of sexiness that was borne out of her passion for life and her unfailing self-esteem.

Ashley and I never hit it off romantically that year, especially with Heather in the picture. We did, however, become best of friends. We were such good friends that there were often things I would tell her that I would never dream of telling Heather. Ash was my confidant. She and I probably ended up spending more time together than Heather and I did.

About two weeks before finals in April, the shit hit the fan. Heather informed me that she wasn't going to be coming back to USF in the fall. My heart was broken. She broke it further when she told me the reason she wasn't coming back to USF. She was going home to marry her high school sweetheart.

For the next week I was like the living dead. I started to sympathize with how Aunt Grace felt after Frank had died. I didn't want to eat. I didn't want to socialize. I just wanted to be alone. I was progressing through my classes on autopilot. All my energy went into studying for finals. Studying meant that I wasn't thinking about Heather.

I shut everyone out of my life that week. I shut out Aunt Grace, my friends, and I also shut out my best friend, Ashley. I hadn't told any of them what had happened so I didn't know, didn't care if they found out from other places. I just wanted to disappear forever. Ashley, being the friend she was, wasn't going to let that happen.

It was the Thursday before finals week that I hit rock bottom. I had even given up studying. I was just moping in bed thinking of good ways to get back at Heather. I won't lie; suicide crossed my mind a few times. As I lay moping in my bed, in my messy dorm room, there was a knock at my door. The last thing I wanted was a visitor.

"Go away!"

The knock was more persistent.

"Let me in Gregory Hamilton," demanded a female voice from the other end. It was Ashley.

"Leave me alone Ash," I yelled and threw my pillow over my face.

I heard the combination being punched into the door, her trying the door and swearing.

"Let me in Greg!" she yelled.

"Go the fuck away! I don't want to talk to anyone," I yelled back, throwing the pillow back on my face again when I was done.

Again I heard her try the combination and then the door opened.

"Where in the fuck have you been?" asked Ashley in near hysterics.

"Leave me alone Ash, I don't want to talk about it," I demanded through the pillow.

"I am not leaving until we talk about whatever happened, Greg."

"Then you are going to be here a long time," I said, again through the pillow.

"Well, lucky for you, I brought my books along so I will sit in here and study while I wait for you to talk."

"Will you get out of my room before I forcibly remove you from my room," I yelled, this time moving the pillow from my face first.

"We both know you won't do that. You would never do anything to hurt me Greg."

She had me there. I would never do anything to hurt my "lucky charm". I called her that because she was Irish and it seemed she brought me good luck many times in my life. The absence of a response to her told her that she was indeed right.

"Greg, you have never had a problem talking to me," said Ashley as she pulled up a chair next to my bed and sat down. She then put her hand on my arm and started rubbing it.

"I don't want to talk about it Ashley," I said, pulling my arm away from her. "It is too embarrassing."

"Did you break up with Heather?" asked Ashley softly.

I shook my head.

"Did she break it off with you?"

I didn't move or say anything for about five seconds and then I finally nodded and started sobbing into my pillow. Ashley didn't say anything. She just rubbed my back as I cried. I don't know how long I cried. I am sure it was a long time, but Ashley didn't leave my side. She didn't speak until I settled down again.

"Can I ask why she broke it off with you?"

I turned around and looked at her. Concern was etched all over her face. I saw the love and caring in her emerald green eyes and I lost all resistance to telling her what happened.

"She is marrying her high school sweetheart," I said, defeated.

"Oh my, "she gasped.

"You can tell me 'I told you so' now," I said to her with unexpected venom in my voice.

"I would never do that Greg," she said, her eyes tearing over.

"You told me she was trouble. I didn't believe you. I thought you were just being jealous. As always I was wrong."

"Greg, I told you she was trouble because I didn't want to see you get hurt, like you are now," said Ashley openly crying now.

"I know," I conceded. "You weren't the only one. Grace told me the same thing. So did Jim." Jim was my roommate.

"You have been so angry at all of us for being right that you couldn't face us, "said Ashley as if she was revealing the meaning of life.

Ashley was one perceptive woman. It was one of the things I liked about her. She always had a firm grasp of a situation. She wasn't very book smart. She struggled to earn her B's and C's; however, she was wise beyond her years.

Chapter 2 »