Chapter 21: The Skate Babe Chat Harem

"Ah, Jesus, Warren, he's starting D-Lew again!"

"Hmm. Must be a lefty on the mound for the Blue Jays."

"Yeah. Wells."

"Who we got?"

"Arrojo. At least Offy is playing. Lewis is batting ninth."

They were sitting in the Kelleher's living room-Peg, Jim, and Ellen, with Warren and Sophia. Warren's younger brother and sister had stayed outside. Sophia and Warren had turned on the Red Sox.

"You're a Sox fan, Sophia?" asked Jim.

"Big time," confirmed Sophia with a smile.

"She's the Fabulous Baseball Babe," quipped Warren, drawing laughter from the room.

"Yeah, they went to a game about a month ago," Peg smiled. "All I know is Warren spent all his money and was begging me for lunch money by Wednesday," she said with a wry smile.

"War," asked Sophia, "does your Mom know what you spent all your money on?"

"Ah, well-no."

"Oops."

"OK, now you've got me curious," said Peg. "What, exactly, did you spend all your money on?"

"Red Sox jacket."

"I'm confused. You have one. It's hanging up, it's the same one you had since last year."

Sophia grinned a little. "Actually, he bought me a Red Sox jacket. I was admiring it-I was not hinting, I really wasn't."

Peg laughed. "Suuuure you weren't."

"Actually, Mom, she wasn't," interjected Warren. "She just said that she would make sure she brought enough money to get one the next time. I had the cash, so I bought it."

"Ah, yes, young love, I remember it well," mused Jim. "How sweet, how precious, how... expensive!" Everyone laughed at that.

"Actually, I thought you had bought that yourself," said Ellen. "That's kind of an extravagant gift, Warren. Those things aren't cheap."

"Ah, heck," said Warren. "Sometimes, you've just got to say, what the heck. That's the only extravagant gift I've ever gotten her. I don't have the money to do that every day." They all laughed at that. "Well, except for the pendant. But that was different-it was a birthday gift."

"Pendant?" Peg asked.

Sophia smiled. "The one I'm wearing. I never take it off." She got up and walked over to Peg, so she could see.

"Sophia, that's lovely!" Peg smiled. "Warren, you've got good taste."

"In women and jewelry." Warren quipped.

"Yeah, but not in baseball teams," Sophia grumbled. "Delgado just took Arrojo deep, with a man on."

Peg just laughed. "Well, it's a lovely pendant, in any case."

"Yeah, I got all misty when he gave it to me," Sophia laughed. "He said I was the ruler of his heart, so I had to wear it around my neck."

"Remember that mushy romantic stuff that I said they only do sometimes?" asked Ellen. "Well, here it comes."

"Warren, I just realized-I've never bought you anything like this." Sophia said.

"Yeah, well my birthday isn't until January."

"I know, but you didn't get me the jacket for your birthday."

"Sophia, it doesn't matter. I did the jacket on the spur of the moment. This isn't a competition." Sophia relaxed. "However," Warren added with a gleam in his eye, "there is a twelve-string Rickenbacker down at Guitar Center I've had my eye on."

"That's a type of guitar, I take it?" Sophia asked. Warren nodded assent. "How much they cost?"

"Oh, thirteen hundred dollars."

"Well, then, dear heart, you just keep your eye on it. Because that's all you're gonna have on it."

Warren made mock pain noises. "Fine. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to repair to my recording studio-otherwise known as my bedroom-and write myself a new Country Western hit song entitled, 'I Gave My Love my Heart to Wear Around Her Neck, and She Won't Even Buy Me a New Gee-tar."

Sophia hit him with a couch pillow, and then mock-intoned, "So, thus endeth the gooey romantic mush portion of our program."

The parents were in stitches by now. Sophia sat up, and said, "That reminds me. I've never seen your bedroom."

"Thought you wanted to watch the Sox."

"Ah, they suck if Pedro ain't pitching."

"OK. Let's go." They got up off the couch.

"Uh, Warren," Peg said seriously. "You're taking her up to your room?"

"C'mon, Mom. She just wants to see it."

"Uh-huh."

"Really," Sophia smiled, as the disappeared around the corner and up the stairs.

"C'mon, Peg," Ellen smiled. "They're not going to do anything with all of us down here. Don't you trust them?"

Peg smiled at that. "Yeah, you're right. However, I do find it hard to trust anything involving a fourteen year old boy's hormones, a bed, and a girl as pretty as Sophia."

The three parents chatted for a while, getting to know one another. Time passed, and Peg looked at her watch.

"Uh, I'm trying to be trusting, I really am-but they've been up there for over an hour. I'm trying to accept that they're--uh, doing it-but not here, not with Ryan and Kristin around."

"I'd agree-Sophia knows not to risk Eric and Tara seeing any of that-and I do trust them. But maybe we'd better go check..."

They got up, and went up the stairs. The door to Warren's bedroom was closed-not a good sign, although they didn't hear anything coming out of the room. Peg knocked.

"'sopen. Come on in," they heard Warren say.

They walked in, and found Warren sitting on his computer chair, typing into the keyboard. Sophia had pulled up a chair and was gazing at something on the screen. Beatles music was playing on Warren's stereo. And, much to the relief of Peg and Ellen, they were fully clothed.

"Yo," Warren said without looking up. "And this is the official Bourne and Kraatz website," he said to Sophia. "You can get to all of this stuff from the SkateWeb page."

"Cool," said Sophia. "And that mailing list?"

"Yeah, see, you can subscribe from right here. What's your e-mail address?"

"SexKitten23 at aol." They both laughed. "What's yours, by the way?"

"I have two. Preppy99 at hotmail, and BeatleMusic at prodigy."

"That figures," Sophia said. "Both of them."

Warren laughed. "Anyhow, there you go. You are now subscribed to the skatefans list, and the participant skaters list. Check your computer every day, you will be bombarded by emails. Especially when skating season starts."

"Great."

Peg and Ellen had gathered around behind them. Sophia looked up, and smiled. "Warren is showing me some of the neat stuff on the web."

"Porn, mostly," Warren quipped.

Sophia laughed. "He's joking. Really." Peg and Ellen laughed. "No, he showed me lots of music stuff, and now he's showing me some skating stuff."

"Oh," Peg looked chagrined. "You guys were up here so long... and we were worried..."

Warren looked up, bemused. "You were afraid we were up here rutting like rabbits." Peg and Ellen looked at each other, embarrassed. "Don't worry, Mom. There ain't no lock on that door, and all I'd need is to get walked in on by Kristin and I'd have to explain sex to my nine year old sister. I'd rather have a piano fall on my head."

They all laughed. "I'm sorry, Warren," Peg said. "We should have trusted you."

"As long as the house ain't empty, you can trust us," Warren quipped.

"Although," Sophia smiled, "if you had walked in about 45 minutes ago, you would have found us making out a little bit. But all articles of clothing were in their proper place."

"Yeah," smiled Warren, "all except for her bra, because she's not wearing one."

Sophia blushed. "It's too hot to wear a bra."

"Surrrrre..."

"Sex maniac."

"Oh, really? Which one of us, again, is the one with Sex Kitten in their email address?"

"Touche."

Peg and Ellen looked at each other, bemused. "Uh, huh.,"said Peg. "Well, please keep the rest of your clothes on, OK?"